by Tonya Brooks
"It's so easy for the pious to say, I'd never do such a thing, but I call bullshit," she said indignantly as she sat up and turned to look at him. "You never really know what you're capable of doing until you're put in a position to find out. I have no killer instinct whatsoever, but I'd fight to my last breath if someone tried to hurt me."
"That's one thing you'll never have to worry about, beauty," Dane vowed as he sat up next to her, the golden eyes glowing with conviction. "Because I'll destroy anyone who tries."
A chill of apprehension walked across her soul even as his promise warmed her heart. She had finally found a man who would set the world on fire for her. A man who would love and adore her for eternity. Everything she had always wanted could be hers if she had the courage to reach out and take it.
CHAPTER FOUR
Sunday Night
They were relaxing in the bathtub, her back pressed against his front, his arms wrapped loosely around her. Shana had never felt so content in her entire life. Or so loved. Not that either of them had mentioned the L word, but it felt like love to her. Or at least her idea of what it should feel like.
However, she was a practical woman, prone to overthinking every issue. The devil was in the details after all. This weekend had been perfect and ideal. A moment out of time. But the weekend was almost over and she began to wonder if their relationship could survive in the real world where they had busy schedules, bills, and a million other distractions.
She was fairly certain that her feelings for him would not change, but what about his? Dane seemed convinced that she was his mate, but would that stand the test of time? Would they still feel the same way a year from now? A month? Hell, even a week? There was only one way to find out, but he wasn't going to like it.
"Dane, would you do something for me?" She asked hopefully.
His lips pressed a tender kiss into her hair before he replied, "Anything, my beauty."
"Will you agree for us not to see each other for a week?"
"Anything but that," he corrected himself. Shana felt herself being lifted and turned so that she was sitting astride his glorious body. The worry in his eyes wrenched her heart and her resolve almost wavered. Almost. "What's wrong, Shana? Tell me what you're thinking," he urged in genuine concern.
"Nothing is wrong," she hastily assured him and took his hands in hers. "The whole weekend has been so idyllic, but we can't live in our own insulated little bubble and escape the real world forever."
"We could," he countered enigmatically. "If that's what you want to do."
She laughed and leaned forward to place a kiss on his lips. "See? There you go again," Shana accused. "You're too wonderful to be real, Dane. Being with you is like a dream come true, but the problem is that I can't think clearly when I'm with you. I need a few days to myself so I can put things in the proper perspective."
His expression was adorable. He looked like he didn't know whether to be pleased with her admission or pissed at her request. He finally settled for frustration. "I understand your reasoning, but not being able to see you for a week is unacceptable," he admitted. "My wolf would go insane."
"But it wouldn't have to be a whole week," she clarified and slid her hands up his arms to settle on his shoulders. "We can meet again Friday night."
"That's five days," he growled and the wolf made his displeasure known in the tone.
"Please, Dane," she pleaded softly. "I really think we need some time apart."
***
Dane didn't like the idea at all and his wolf hated it. But he refused to be selfish and not let his mate have the time she'd asked for. 'Fucking chivalrous prick,' his wolf complained. Yeah, he was that all right. However, if Shana needed time away from him, then that was what she was going to get.
Even if it killed him to do it.
It probably would.
His wolf was snapping and snarling furiously at the decision, but the beast would have to get over it. Their mate's wants and needs took precedence. "If it'll make you happy," he conceded.
"Oh, I'd be much happier with you," she assured him and his heart damn near burst with joy. "But… being your mate is a monumental step and I don't want to rush into it. I don't want either of us to have any regrets."
He slid his hands sensually up her sides and eased her chest down against his. "Beauty, the only regret I'll ever have is not meeting you sooner," he vowed and kissed her tenderly.
She smiled and framed his face with her hands. "How do you feel about bathtub sex?"
Since it was quite possibly the only place in the suite they hadn't made love, he was all for it.
Monday Morning
Dane had not been pleased to discover that Shana had meant to cut off all forms of communication until Friday. He'd looked so hurt that she'd almost changed her stance and given him her phone number. However, she knew that the sound of his voice would be enough to have her right back in his bed tonight.
Which was exactly where she wanted to be.
God, she was so weak-willed where he was concerned. So much for her reputation as the Iron Maiden, a tough as nails prosecuting attorney with a backbone of steel. The big bad wolf shifter had turned her into a spineless jellyfish who wanted nothing more than to please him. Not her normal behavior.
Shana was a strong, independent woman. The kind of woman who would walk all over a lesser man, and had done so on numerous occasions. She also wouldn't tolerate a domineering man who thought he could control her. Hence the main reason why her relationships never seemed to work out.
Dane was not the kind of man she could use as a doormat, thankfully. And though he was a dominant wolf shifter, he deferred to her wishes instead of trying to force her to do something she wasn't ready to. A man of intellect, he used reason to persuade her to his way of thinking instead of expecting blind obedience.
Which was a good thing since the word was not in her vocabulary. She hadn't been kidding when she'd told him that she could be a bitch. Shana had been accused of it more times than she could remember, usually with good reason. Most men didn't like losing to a woman and she was damn good at her job.
Her job.
Oh, hell. It was time to get her brain back in the real world again. She'd be willing to bet that Lawrence would be camped out in her office. Ugh. The last thing she felt like doing was dealing with him. How she longed to be back in Dane's arms in their snug little hideaway, safe and sound from the rest of the world.
"Girl, where have you been?" Her assistant and best friend Cindy De Suza demanded as she rushed to embrace her fiercely. "One measly text Friday morning telling me that you're not coming in and not to worry does not cut it. What the hell happened? My heart couldn’t catch a break all weekend."
"I'm sorry I worried you, Cind," Shana said contritely as she returned the hug. "I just needed to get away."
"Lawrence is a basket case and he's slept on our couch all weekend," she complained as she stepped back to look her over as if inspecting for damage. "What did he do? The rat bastard wouldn't tell me a damn thing."
Oh, she'd bet he'd kept that little detail to himself, Shana thought wryly. Knowing her best friend's temper it was probably a good thing he had or Cindy would have kicked his ass. Amused by the thought, she promised, "I'll tell you all about it tonight."
"Is it an ice cream or wine kind of night?" She asked solemnly while brushing a wayward lock of curly black hair away from her face.
Since their college days, the two of them had consoled each other over numerous breakups and semi-broken hearts. Ice cream was their weapon of choice for a break-up and wine for a broken heart. "How about dinner instead?" She suggested since she didn't need consoling.
Cindy looked puzzled but nodded her confirmation. "I'll order something in," she agreed and then thought to ask. "What do I tell Lawrence when he shows up?"
A multitude of answers raced through her mind, but she settled for the less complicated, "Tell him to come right on in."
Less than five minu
tes after she arrived, Lawrence blew into her office as immaculately attired as ever and not a hair out of place. The only sign of the emotional strain that Cindy mentioned was the slightly wild look in his eyes. Yeah. She'd bet her law book collection that he was more worried about his reputation than her heart.
"Shana, sweetheart, let me explain," he said in a low, urgent tone as he closed the door behind him.
"I think I got the picture Friday morning," she assured him evenly and realized that she wasn't angry with him anymore. How about that? She wasn't even pissed that he'd lied to her or that she'd caught him with another man. In fact, she probably ought to thank him. Because had it not been for his infidelity, she never would have met Dane.
Her mate.
Shana was unaware that the thought had brought a smile to her face. The man across the desk from her saw it and obviously thought the worst. Smiling while she went in for the kill was her signature move after all. "Sweetheart, it's not what you think," he hastily denied as he moved around the desk.
"Oh, I'm pretty sure seeing your dick in another man's ass is exactly what I thought it was," she countered and barely bit back a laugh at his horrified expression. "Lawrence, it's okay. I just wish that you'd told me the truth."
"You do?" He gulped nervously and slumped heavily against the edge of her desk in relief. "I'm so sorry."
"I'm not," she denied honestly. Even though his betrayal had hurt like hell, her sense of fairness insisted that she give him the opportunity to defend himself. However, the office was not the best place for that to happen, so she suggested, "Come by tonight after dinner and I'll give you the chance to explain."
"All right," he agreed and looked slightly dazed as he rose and headed for the door. His hand on the doorknob, Lawrence paused and said in a confused tone, "I can't believe how well you're handling this."
After the way she'd gone all psycho crazy bitch Friday morning, her lack of fury probably did confuse the hell out of him. "Don't get the idea you're forgiven. The verdict is still out as to whether or not you get to keep your balls," she warned and shooed him out the door.
***
That night, the take-out boxes had barely been opened before Cindy demanded, "Start talking, girl, and it better be good."
Since they had no secrets between them, Shana did just that. "Thursday night, Lawrence and I discussed one of my cases over dinner at his place. Friday morning I remembered that I'd left the file there, so I went to get it, assuming that he'd already left for work," she said as she piled food on her plate.
It had been a reasonable assumption since her father was grooming her ex to take over as district attorney when he retired so Lawrence was always the first in and the last out of the office. Her friend nodded her understanding and prodded impatiently, "And?"
"When I got there, I let myself in and grabbed the file off the coffee table," she explained. "I heard moaning coming from the bedroom so I went down the hall to make sure that he was okay and caught him having sex with someone else."
Cindy's mouth fell open in shock before she exclaimed, "Shut the fuck up!"
"I don't know which of us was more shocked," she admitted.
"That dirty rat bastard," she seethed furiously and slapped her palm on top of the table, her lovely mocha cheeks flushing angrily. "I cannot believe he'd cheat on you! And I wasted my whole weekend consoling his sorry ass. Girl, you just say the word and that's one body that'll never be found."
"Oh, it gets better," she assured her hot-tempered friend. "He was with a man."
"What?" Cindy screeched in astonishment. "Are you shitting me?"
"I shit you not," she denied in amusement.
The other woman looked as if she'd been gobsmacked. "Lawrence… and another man?" She exclaimed in amazement and then demanded, "Who the hell was he?"
"I have no idea," Shana admitted and really didn't care. "His face was buried in a pillow."
The other woman's mouth fell open again and her light brown eyes were huge orbs. "So Lawrence was…"
"Balls deep," she confessed and burst out laughing at her best friends expression.
"Oh. My. God. This is insane," Cindy replied and still looked as if she were in shock. She threw both hands in the air with her usual dramatic flair and demanded, "What did you do?"
"I threw the engagement ring at him, screamed some obscenities and left," she confessed. "Then I got in my car, drove to the closest bar and started slurping Long Island Ice Teas like they were water."
Cindy's expression suddenly became concerned. "Your fiancé cheated on you... with a man no less, and yet you're remarkably calm about the whole situation," she pointed out and seemed confused as hell. "Are you sure you’re okay, Shay?"
"I wasn't until I met someone," she admitted with a cat that got the canary grin.
The other woman slapped both hands down on top of the table and crowed victoriously, "You had revenge sex!"
"Better than that. I met my fated mate," Shana said gleefully and did a happy dance in her seat. "Can you believe it, Cind? I have a mate!"
Her roommate squealed in delight and leaned across the table to hug her. "Congratulations! That's wonderful," she enthused. "Girl, I want every last detail." An hour later they were both still smiling like loons and Cindy just kept saying, "Wow," which pretty much said it all as far as Shana was concerned.
"So you're not going to see him again until Friday," she mused with a smirk. "That's really gonna suck."
She agreed wholeheartedly. "Dane insisted I keep a room key," she replied. "In case I change my mind."
"He's just going to stay at the hotel all week and wait for you?" The other woman deduced and she nodded in confirmation. "Wow. He sounds incredible."
"He is," she admitted. "I can't wait for you to meet him."
"Obviously you can," she pointed out dryly as the doorbell rang. Cindy went to answer it and when she saw Lawrence, she slammed the door in his face.
"Cind, let him in," Shana insisted. "I invited him."
"Girl, you have lost your damn mind," she accused and opened the door. She glared sheer venom at the man standing there and snapped, "And you are a lying, cheating, dirty rat bastard!"
"You're right," he agreed solemnly. "I am."
"At least you can admit it," Cindy said with an indignant sniff and did not step aside so he could enter.
He held up a paper bag from her roommate's favorite bakery and said, "I brought a peace offering."
Cindy snatched the bag, peeked inside and her expression softened a little. "You're not forgiven," she informed him. "But this saved you from getting your skinny ass kicked. For now."
"I'd hoped it would," he admitted ruefully since they knew each other well. The roommates had met Lawrence while he and Shana were in law school. They had been the three musketeers for eight years and she realized it would be a damn shame to ruin their friendship after all this time.
"I'm going to my room to indulge in cheesecake and a steamy romance novel," she informed them as she turned and walked away. "Do not make me come out and referee or it will be painful."
"Yes, ma'am," Lawrence dutifully agreed as he stepped inside and closed the door.
After her best friend left the room, he just stood there with his hands in his pockets, his expression reflecting an uncertainty that was totally alien to his character. "Sit down and start talking," she commanded.
"I have a mate," he said quietly after he was seated across from her.
"What?" Shana exclaimed in shock. "Why the hell didn't I know this? And why were you going to marry me if you have a mate?"
"Because he doesn't want anyone to know that he's gay," he admitted heavily and hung his head.
"Oh, shit," she breathed in realization. "That was him? Your mate?"
"Yes, and he's terrified that you recognized him," Lawrence confessed.
"All I saw was his ass," she replied and then grudgingly admitted, "It was a very nice ass."
A hint of a smile quirked his li
ps. "Yeah. It really is."
Shana curled into her favorite position with her feet beneath her as she tried to make sense of this. "How long have you known you were mates?"
"Since college," he confessed. "Until I met him I'd never even considered having a same-sex relationship, but there was this instant bond between us. Like I knew him, had always known him. Like he was a part of me."
"I understand," she agreed because she did. That was exactly how she had felt with Dane from the moment they met. "What I don't understand is why you never told me about him."
"He's a famous athlete, not to mention his alpha is archaic and same-sex unions are forbidden in his pack," he replied wryly. "He won't go public with our relationship and I can’t live half a life anymore. Our marriage would have ended my relationship with him."
"So you decided if you couldn't have him you'd settle for me," she sighed without condemnation since she'd done the same damn thing when her ideal man hadn't come along.
Lawrence grimaced. "Damn, Shana, it wasn't like that," he denied. "You and I are compatible in every way. I honestly thought we could have a good life together."
She couldn't argue with that since those were the same reasons why she had agreed to marry him. "We could have if I hadn't caught you cheating on me," she accused hotly. "Dammit, Lawrence, you know how I feel about infidelity. I thought we shared the same views."
"We do," he hastily assured her. "I insisted that you and I wait to have sex because I can't cheat on my mate any more than I could be unfaithful to you."
"Why?"
"Because I do love you, Shana," he admitted and the sincerity was evident in his tone. "You're my best friend and the thought of hurting you rips my guts out. Having you as a buffer is the only way I'll ever have the strength to stay away from him. I'd give anything to be able to go back and fix this so it never happened."
"But it did happen and you can't undo it," she pointed out reasonably. "So now we need to decide how to proceed from here."