“Wouldn’t the council have a problem with that? Wouldn’t they be afraid he’d use me for his own ends?”
“Perhaps, but Laramie is powerful and has strong friends. We’d offer to study you of course. But the truth is you’d be Laramie’s, wholly.”
“Silas has already told the council Doctor Schubert wants to study my situation further.” Alec licked his lips. His heart was starting to slow its pounding in his chest. He just wanted out of this situation with this crazy vampire.
“Yes, but Silas is allowing you freedoms and rights that you won’t have with Laramie. You’d be caged and studied. Laramie would be in full control of everything you did.”
“You’d treat me like some sort of animal?” Alec had assumed when she was talking about him being leashed she had meant it in the most loosely translated way. Now he wasn’t so sure she wasn’t completely literal.
“You are an abomination!” she spat out. “You are neither human nor vampire. You shouldn’t exist. According to our laws you have no rights.” She was practically in his face now.
Alec took a step back.
“Doctor Schubert doesn’t agree with you,” Alec said as defiantly as he could in his fear. With each moment his heartbeat was slowing and he was gaining control of his fear.
Cassandra barked a laugh. “Doctor Schubert is more interested in getting you under his microscope. He doesn’t care about your rights or your existence. He just wants to understand you, but you are nothing more than a wild animal to be used in whatever manner the strongest of us sees fit. And we are the strongest. One way or another we will control you or we will see you dead,” Cassandra said sharply and used one of her manicured nails to dig painfully into Alec’s chest and force him step by step backwards until he was pressed painfully into one of the bookshelves.
Alec was still afraid but his terror had subsided. He wasn’t an animal. He deserved to be treated better than this. He also had the ability to stand up to her physically if he could just burn blood. He didn’t want to have to fight Cassandra here in Silas’s own mansion. He didn’t want to, but he would if it came down to it, or at least he’d try to if he could make his abilities work.
“Please…” he said again not meeting her eyes. “Just let me go.” He was still reaching for that feeling of time slowing. He so desperately needed to burn blood so that he might be able to get himself out of this situation. With his fear in check he was hoping he could do it. Cassandra’s presence reminded him so much of Clarissa that he almost couldn’t stand it. She had that same cruel glint to her eyes that Clarissa had on the night she turned him. Clarissa and Cassandra were both insane. The only difference was Cassandra was smart enough to hide it.
Cassandra smiled coldly at him. “So are you refusing my offer? You know if you’d been in my protectorate you’d already be dead or under our control. We don’t tolerate abominations to roam freely amidst us. Silas has grown weak.” Cassandra grabbed Alec’s chin cruelly and turned his head forcefully until he met her gaze. “You are as weak as Silas. If it were left up to me, I would kill you right here and now. Instead I will get to watch the council humiliate and demean you and then put you to death. If they don’t, we will. Your days are numbered Alec Carson.” She squeezed harder. “One way or another they are numbered.”
Alec swallowed loudly.
“Silas thinks there’s a good chance they will keep me alive to study me. Even if they disagree I have the right to live. I didn’t do anything wrong! I didn’t ask for any of this,” Alec said as defiantly as he could.
Cassandra squeezed his face painfully and laughed then. “You are such a fool. There are changes coming that you aren’t aware of.”
Suddenly the door to the library burst open and Marcus and Silas entered. Cassandra released Alec and turned away from him.
“Silas, did you come to check on your pet? I knew Xavier would run straight to his master and tattle,” Cassandra said coldly.
“Is there a problem here Alec?” Silas asked not taking his eyes from Cassandra’s hard gaze.
“No,” Alec said after a moment dropping his eyes. He was ashamed of his fear in front of two men that he respected. He was trying to gain control of it but he just couldn’t seem to. Even now with Silas and Marcus in the room he was trembling and afraid of Cassandra.
Daringly Alec said, “But Cassandra, if you ever do try to kill me, you might find it more difficult than you expect.” He was afraid to meet her eyes when he said this.
Silas’s eyes narrowed dangerously at Cassandra. Before he could say anything to Cassandra about threatening guests under his very roof, she stormed out of the library.
Alec let out a breath that was half sob. He really, really hated and was terrified of that woman.
Safely back in Silas’s sound proof office, Alec sat with a drink in his hand and filled Silas and Marcus in on what had happened. Silas was angry but silent for a few minutes as he considered what had transpired.
“Alec it wasn’t wise of you to talk to Cassandra like that. She already hates you,” Silas finally said.
“What’s she going to do Silas, threaten to kill me twice? She’s already stated that either the council is going to kill me or she and Laramie will do it. I’m tired of being threatened. You said vampires respect strength. Maybe it’s time I started acting strong instead of acting weak. I’m not going to go out starting fights or anything but unless I start standing up for myself I will be seen as weak. I refuse to give in to bullies any longer. I’ve been doing it all my life and I’m sick and damn tired of it!” Alec was trying to be strong but it sounded weak even to his own ears.
Silas was quietly thinking and then he sighed. “I hope you know what you are getting yourself into. Don’t go picking fights but standing up for yourself is a good idea. As long as you’re careful,” he cautioned.
“Doesn’t it bother you that Cassandra threatened to kill a guest under your protection in your own house?” Marcus asked Silas. “If you pull the video from the library you’d have enough to detain Cassandra until the council meets.”
“It’s not worth the trouble,” Silas said waving the idea away. “Laramie would make life difficult with his demands and Cassandra would turn this around somehow on Alec and she’d end up getting a slap on the wrist and that would be that.”
Marcus bit his lip but nodded slowly.
Xavier entered the room quietly and walked over to where the three men were seated on the couch.
“You will be pleased to know, Cassandra has decided to return to Laramie tonight. She has packed her things and they are preparing to leave even as we speak.”
“Good,” Marcus said clapping his hands once. Silas gave him a look but Marcus just smiled at him.
Alec, Marcus and Silas talked for a few minutes more. Silas had some work to do so Marcus and Alec were again left on their own. They decided to work on Alec’s control some more so Marcus led Alec back to the gym. As usual it was empty and they had the area to themselves. Alec wondered briefly if the vampires ever really used it. Did they get bored and challenge each other to games of basketball? The thought almost made Alec laugh.
Alec wondered why he let Cassandra get to him? What was it about her that scared him, other than her cruelty, and the fact that she was a vampire and reminded him of Clarissa? Yeah, why should he be scared of her?
“You want to talk about it?” Marcus asked breaking into Alec’s thoughts.
Alec shrugged his shoulders and sighed. “What’s to talk about? I’m a half vampire that can only use my abilities when my life is in danger; not when I’m getting beat up or threatened, only when my life is actually in danger!” He sighed again.
“How did it work when you were at the pizza place with Jake? Your life wasn’t in immediate danger then.” Marcus sat in the bleachers and looked at Alec.
“No,” Alec said thinking. “My life wasn’t in danger but I was very angry.”
“Then use that,” Ma
rcus said thinking.
“The problem was,” Alec said frowning, “I wasn’t in control. If you hadn’t come along and stopped me I would have killed someone, maybe several someones. I had no control what so ever. I was just angry.”
“So if your life is threatened you can burn blood and protect yourself, but if you use anger then you are out of control.” Marcus shrugged. “Could be worse.”
“How?” Alec said frowning at him.
“You could have no abilities at all and be bullied your whole life.”
Alec shook his head.
They tried working on Alec's control for about an hour. Marcus would have Alec concentrate and try to burn blood and perform certain actions but it just wasn’t working. Alec simply could not use his abilities without being threatened with physical harm. The more Alec tried, the more frustrated he got with the whole situation.
Alec had forgiven Marcus for spying on him. He had just been doing his job and looking out for Alec as well. In the short amount of time they had known each other, they had become close. Marcus didn't have to help Alec with his abilities but he did. He wondered how much of this Marcus would report back to Silas but didn't really care. He trusted Silas, and it had been Marcus's idea to keep it between them. They talked briefly about it but didn’t want to say too much in such an unsecured location like the gym. Anyone could be spying on them.
Alec enjoyed the changes in his body that had taken place and the abilities that he had, when they worked. He enjoyed being able to move quickly and quietly, and the ability to pick up heavy objects. He had never felt more alive than when he burned blood and used his abilities. But he was half vampire and that thought still made him uneasy. He still had questions about his future and more importantly his soul, but he was afraid to give them voice, even to Marcus. He wasn't sure he wanted to know whether or not he was actually damned…or half damned or whatever. But it had kept him up at night thinking about it. Maybe Cassandra was right. Maybe he was an abomination. That thought ate at him.
Marcus broke into his train of thought and led Alec over to the bleachers to sit. Alec lay back with his hands behind his head. “This is so frustrating. I know I can do it, but I can’t control when it actually works.”
Marcus shrugged. "True, but when it does work, you are stronger and faster than you should be. Your strength and speed rivals vampires that have been around far longer. That's unheard of. Just look at what happened at the pizza place. You beat five vampires. Any vampire would have trouble doing that, and a fledgling shouldn’t be able to do it at all."
"I know," Alec said, sighing. "I've just never been good at anything and I want to be good at something." He laughed at how pathetic he sounded.
"Well, you might not have been good at anything before but now you have a brand new start. You just have to put your mind to it and make it happen."
Alec nodded at this. “Easier said than done.”
"Come on, let's go swimming." Marcus jumped up and sped off towards the pool with Alec in pursuit. They entered the pool area, the warm, moist chlorinated air surrounding them as they entered. It was a little warm for Alec, but he loved the heated water of the pool.
Both men stripped off their shirts and threw them in chairs as soon as they entered. They sat as they untied and removed their shoes and socks. Marcus remained seated as Alec stood and dropped his cargo pants, folding them carefully and placing them in the chair with his shirt.
"What are you waiting for? Are you enjoying the view?" he asked laughing.
Marcus chuckled. "Who wouldn't?" and he winked at Alec. He stood then and dropped his jeans, folding them. Both men laughing jumped into the pool.
Marcus had Alec try to burn blood and swim laps back and forth across the large pool, but again it didn’t work. Marcus wasn’t surprised but he was trying to get Alec comfortable with trying to burn blood on command so that it became easier. Alec still couldn’t quite reach that feeling of time slowing down. The only time it was easy to accomplish was when something dangerous happened and he did it subconsciously. He was hoping it would get easier and he wouldn't have to 'try'.
"So, what did Jake think about all this?" Marcus asked as they were treading water in the deep end of the pool.
Alec sighed and shook his head. "He is worried about me and what will happen."
"What did he think about you being a vampire?"
"Well, he thought the physical changes in me were amazing. He said he was jealous that I didn't have to exercise and still looked…like this." Alec laughed out loud. "When I met him at the park he didn't even recognize me. He nodded at me as he passed. It wasn't until I said something to him that he recognized it was me."
Marcus laughed. "Was he okay with all of it? It didn't freak him out or anything?"
Alec shrugged. "Yeah he seemed to be okay with it. Growing up the way we did, you got used to things being a certain way and you couldn't change them no matter what. I guess he just accepts it."
Marcus nodded. "I didn't know if it would put a strain on your friendship. You guys were close growing up?"
"Yeah," Alec said smiling. "He was my best friend. He watched out for me when I got picked on. He was like my older brother. Neither one of us ever got adopted because of our age, and the foster system was shit, so we lived and worked at the orphanage."
"Did you get picked on a lot?" Marcus asked frowning.
"After my parents died, I went into my shell and never came back out. I was the quiet kid and that made me a target for the bullies. I never took up for myself, but Jake was always there for me, keeping me from getting the crap beat out of me. He's a good guy."
Marcus nodded. "He seems to be. At least you had someone there watching out for you."
"We always helped each other out. He kept me from getting beat up and I helped him with his homework. I had to tutor him in math all through high school and he still barely passed." Alec laughed as he remembered all the nights trying to teach Jake geometry. That had been a nightmare.
Marcus swam to the edge of the pool and pulled himself out, sitting on the side with his legs dangling in the water. Alec swam over and joined him. The air was cooler than the water and he shivered.
"Neither one of us had a family and we were all that the other had." He shrugged.
"Well, you have us now," Marcus said squeezing his shoulder. "We are your family. Your slightly psychotic, immortal, blood-drinking family," he said laughing.
"That's great," Alec said laughing and rolling his eyes. He stood up and stretched. Marcus sat there for a moment and then put his hand out, which Alec took and pulled him up. There was a long moment where they stood there, chest to chest and just looked at one another, and then Alec broke it by looking away. What is wrong with me? he wondered.
They walked over to the towels and started drying off. Alec jumped like he was guilty of something when the door to the swimming area opened and a guard peered in. When he saw Alec and Marcus he entered and walked up to them, eyeing both of their naked forms. Marcus just stood there, unembarrassed and let the man look. Alec felt weird about being checked out but he refused to be ashamed and cover himself.
The guard was a young man, probably Alec's age and human. His red hair was cut short and looked military. His blue eyes finally met the two men’s and flicked back and forth between them.
"Alec, Doctor Schubert would like to see you in his office when you are done and Marcus, Silas would like for you to join him in the sitting room." He looked like he was sweating from the humidity in his uniform and tactical vest.
"Thanks Max," Marcus said while he finished drying himself. "Please let them know we will be with them shortly."
Max looked like he was going to salute but caught himself and nodded once. He checked out both men once more before he exited.
Alec frowned. "What was that about? Him checking us out?"
Marcus laughed. "He's probably never seen a vampire naked and was curious. It happen
s a lot."
"Really?" Alec asked incredulously.
"Yeah, everything about us changes when we are turned. We become stronger, more attractive and better built. It makes us better predators and better able to feed."
This stunned Alec. "What do you mean?"
They walked over to their clothes and sat down.
"We change to make us more attractive, better built and uh…larger in many areas," Marcus said delicately. "It makes humans more attracted to us and therefore easier to draw in and feed on. Well, back in the day, not these days obviously. But back before the council, a vampire fed where he or she could. Our bodies not only become stronger but more attractive and muscular. We become better looking physically so that we could draw in a larger number of prey."
He shrugged. "It's just the way it works. Depending on your age when you are turned, determines the attributes that will be highlighted." Both men were still sitting in the chairs, Alec caught up in what Marcus was telling him.
“Such as?”
"Well, with young men like us, our looks and our bodies are accentuated. With older people like Silas, it makes them more distinguished and notable. Don't get me wrong, Silas has muscles under those suits he wears." Marcus laughed then. "With older people in their sixties or so, it makes them look like one of your grandparents on steroids. It brings out the attributes that will make you most appealing and trustworthy to humans. If we were plain looking or drab, it would make it harder for us to feed."
Alec had never thought about it. He just accepted that his looks had changed with no question as to why. Vampires in stories were always more attractive than humans. He looked down at his body. It had definitely changed for the better. He could see how his looks would draw people in making them easy prey. Hell, he'd even been flirted with for the first time ever after he had started changing.
Marcus stood up and started dressing. "Things have changed a lot for our kind, but being a vampire is all about feeding. Everything about us is a weapon in that arsenal; strength, speed, agility, mind control, our looks, hell, even sex. It seems brutal to put it that way but it's the truth."
Shadow Born: Book 1 of the Shadow-Borne Chronicles Page 13