by B. J. McMinn
Shocked, her gaze went from John to Tyler and saw little resemblance. But, if this man was Tyler and Janey’s father, he must be Margaret’s husband. By the way they were draped over each other, it would be a safe conclusion. Then what did that make Jason, who still held Emma. Neither of which took part in the family reunion.
It alleviated the guilt over her attraction to Jason knowing he was not Margaret’s husband. It also brought many other questions to mind.
Margaret ushered everyone into the house complaining she had held supper long enough. She scolded John for being late as she set food on the table. John and Jason looked at each other and burst out laughing. Margaret smiled at them both and blushed.
Jade wandered around the room as Margaret set out the evening meal. She stood next to the fireplace, her eyes riveted on a framed tintype on the mantle. The woman sitting in a chair held a small baby snuggled on her lap. A little girl stood beside her, a ruffled pinafore covered her simple dress. The man at her side, with his hand on her shoulder, resembled Jason to a large degree, yet, the eyes were not Jason’s.
Her hands grasped the mantle, her knuckles turned white. Another man and woman with small children gathered around floated in her memory. Blurred, fragmented memories. Painful memories. She waited breathlessly for the memories to congeal into a clear image of the past. Nothing. The past tormented her by dancing just out of her reach. For a moment in time, she could see things clearly. Then watch helplessly as they vanished into the darkness.
A gentle touch on her shoulder startled her. She whirled her head around in a swift movement to stare into the blue eyes of the hands owner. Jason stood with a rueful smile on his face.
Jason had observed the distant expression in Jade’s eyes. Watching her closely as pain washed over her lovely features. Her grip on the mantle was one of desperation. Had fear swept her away into what held her in its thrall when she slept? Or was it something she visualized from the tintype of his family?
Earlier she and Margaret appeared to have a sort of silent communication. At first, he had thought her lack of speech due to the fact a person couldn’t get two words in edgewise when talking to his sister. Now he was taking a different perspective on the matter.
He accepted the fact that she couldn’t or wouldn’t communicate with anyone. Had something traumatic happened to her that she had lost the ability to speak, or had she been born unable to talk? Margaret hadn’t found out anything about Jade so far, and he needed to know if she had anyone waiting for her before he could set his plan into motion.
Not wanting to startle her, he gently touched her shoulder. She twisted at the waist to stare up at him and he was immediately swallowed up in the depths of her incredible green eyes.
“My parents,” he stated simply. “They passed away before we came west,” Jason explained. “Margaret has supper ready if you would like to sit down.” Jason led Jade to the table with silent concern.
With supper over, she and Margaret worked together: washing the dishes, setting the kitchen to rights. Jade felt comfortable in the kitchen, cooking and cleaning, although, she had no memory of doing such chores. When they finished they join the men and children in the family area.
Jason sat in his favorite chair holding a sleeping Emma, John and Margaret sat on the sofa each holding a child. Curious, Jade’s gaze passed from John, to Margaret, to Jason and back again. Margaret glanced at her, and Jade masked her expression of bafflement. In the confusion of John’s arrival, everyone had neglected to introduce him to her. What was the relationship here?
“I’m sorry Jade. You look confused. John,” Margaret said. She interrupted his conversation with Jason by tugging on his sleeve. John turned his head to smile at her. “This is Jade. Jade my husband, John.”
Jade looked at Jason, then to Margaret who seem to understand the voiceless question in her eyes.
“Jason is my widowed brother.” Relief washed over Jade like a flood. Self-condemnation had flicked her conscience with guilt. She hadn’t been lusting after another woman’s husband after all.
Margaret glanced down at the child in her arms. “Looks like the long day has caught up with these little ones. Time for bed.”
John and Jason rose, each held a sleeping child, and headed for the bedroom that John and Margaret would share.
“I’ll put Tyler to bed and come back for Janey,” John said.
Once the children were tucked into bed, she listened to Jason, Margaret, and John discussed different happenings in town.
CHAPTER 12
“We’re going to the barn,” Jason announced.
The sun had just set over the horizon as the men made their way to the barn. Jason lit a lamp he had taken from a nail high on the wall.
“What was that all about in there?” John asked as he closed the barn door. “I didn’t want to ask in front of her, but who is that ‘girl?”
There’s that name again. Jason grimaced. “We call her Jade.”
“What do you mean ‘we call her Jade’? Isn’t that her name? If not, what is?” John asked, confused.
He told John how they found her on the trail when he and Margaret had returned to the ranch. Of how she hadn’t spoken a word and that they knew absolutely nothing about her.
“Margaret thinks if she had family somewhere, they would be trying to find her,” Jason continued. “Have you heard anything in town?”
“No, I haven’t. I believe Margaret is probably right. When Indians take captives there’s usually not anyone left to complain.”
Jason mulled this over for a while then blurted out, “I want to marry her.”
Jason flinched. When it came to talking about Jade, he was either saying the wrong thing the right way or the right thing the wrong way. Nothing appeared simple anymore.
“Whoa partner.” John laughed. “From the looks of her she might already have a husband. There’s a few pit falls to your plan. One.” John flicked an index finger in the air. “You’ve known the girl for no more than a week. Two.” Another finger shot upward. “According to Margaret, she’s in no condition to disclose information about her past.”
Too blunt, Jason thought, and backtracked. He’d have to use reason to work his way around John objections. If John understood the motive behind his plan, perhaps he’d help him convince Margaret.
“We’ve already established the fact that it’s highly unlikely that anyone is looking for her,” Jason reasoned.
“Margaret told me she’s pregnant,” He added. From the smile that crossed John’s face Jason assumed he hadn’t been talking out of line. He pressed on. Margaret was John’s weak spot.
“It will be hard on her having three children underfoot while she’s pregnant. You know what a hard time she had with Janey. If I had a wife, I could keep Emma with me. I don’t like being a stranger to my own daughter,” Jason explained.
He could see John’s resistance begin to crumble with the mention of Margaret’s health. Jason pressed his cause further. “I couldn’t expect Jade to stay at the ranch without the benefit of marriage, even though it would be a marriage of convenience.”
John gave Jason a hard stare then burst out laughing. “What? Whom do you think you’re kidding? The way you look at the girl, not likely. I’ve seen the passion in your eyes when they linger on her pixie face and small, delicate body. A ‘marriage of convenience’ between the two of you has a snowballs chance in hell of working.”
Heat traveled up the back of his neck. Jason hadn’t thought anyone had noticed his attraction to Jade.
“Besides, have you thought of the baby she’s carrying? It might be a half-breed,” John countered. “Are you willing to raise her child no matter what?”
Jason was thinking hard and fast. For the last week, only one thought had consumed him. If he could somehow keep Jade and she would be willing to care for Emma then Emma could stay with him on the ranch. John bringing up the fact her baby might be part Indian was not something he’d considered when devising his p
lan. Would he be willing to do that?
“Do you think the town’s people would hold it against the child?”
“This area hasn’t been plagued by ambushes and raids. So the locals don’t hold a lot of animosity toward Indians. In fact, several Indians trade at my store and people treat them politely. I don’t believe they would hold a child accountable for its birth.”
“Then I don’t see where there’s a problem.” Unless Jade wouldn’t marry him, then all his planning would have been for nothing.
“Let me be the first to congratulate you on your marriage and new fatherhood,” John said with a chuckle, slapping him on the shoulder. “I hope you figure out how to get her to say ‘I do’ before the nuptials. Now I’m going in to crawl into bed beside my wife before any kids wake up.”
CHAPTER 13
It was late. Jason couldn’t sleep. The bed creaked as he rolled over to stare at the wall separating his room from Jade’s. Worry kept him awake. Was he doing the right thing for Emma? He wanted to be a father to her, not have John take his place in his daughter’s life.
Was he doing the right thing for Jade? She needed a place to make a life for her and her child. As for him, he would be getting his daughter back, a beautiful wife in his home, if not his bed.
He was not a man to seek out the local brothel for his needs, then have the town’s people know and scorn Jade for it. Jason had watched other men with fine wives follow this path, and he had seen it destroy those women day by day. He wouldn’t do that to Jade. He hadn’t noticed the loss of physical contact in the last year. The future wouldn’t be any different he assure himself. The heat that sizzled between them would surely die out as they became better acquainted.
A slight sound caught his attention. At first, he believed it to be one of the children that slept in Margaret and John’s room. When his sister did not immediately tend to the whimper, he realized the soft cry had come from Jade’s room.
Jason slipped into his trousers and padded on bare feet across the floor to Jade’s bedroom. Opening the door he saw the moonlight slanted across the bed where she lay curled up on her side, reminiscent of the way he had found her on the trail.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, as he had done so many nights, he took her hand, rubbed the back gently with his thumb, and began to talk to her. This time he didn’t talk of things in general, but told her of a future he envisioned for her and himself. He wanted his daughter with him so desperately that he had come up with an idea that would help him and solve her problem as well. If she would consider staying with him on the ranch, with marriage of course, he wouldn’t want her to feel less than respectful, then he would take care of her and her child and she could take care of his.
He promised it wouldn’t be a real marriage since they barely knew each other, but he felt they would get along well enough.
Slowly, the voice pulled Jade back from the dark pit she had fallen into when she slept. The voice could always draw her back into reality. She felt, more than saw, the man sitting on her bed, holding her hand, talking to her in the smooth way he had with words that could console, yet excite her. Only this time, the soft timbre held a deep poignant sound.
She forced her hand to stay limp so he would not realize she was awake.
Jade could hear the sadness in his voice when he spoke of his child, how he wanted to be with her, and how circumstances kept them apart. He wanted to watch her grow each day into womanhood, not be an absent father whom she rarely saw. Thinking of her own child, she understood his pain. But could she do as he asked and live life without love. Jade felt there had been love in her life, but could not recall where or when. It was but a shadow in the darkness that surrounded her.
Jason could feel her body relax as he spoke. He gently laid her hand down and almost reached out to brush back a stray red curl from her forehead. He pulled his hand back. He didn’t want to disturb, or wake her. Tomorrow, he would speak to her. No other way had presented itself and if he was truthful with himself, the thought of being married to Jade left him excited, on edge, yet, with great anticipation. He only hoped she would agree and John would keep Margaret from trying to talk him out of it. Rising, he walked across the room and quietly shut the door behind him.
What would she do? What could she do? Jade weighed her options, which were pitifully few, and hoped tomorrow didn’t bring a change of mind on his part. It was easy for her to accept the idea in the dark of night. She prayed she could say yes in the light of day.
CHAPTER 14
Breakfast was a strained affair. Jade cast nervous glances toward Jason. He appeared deep in thought. Did he worry about how he’d ask her to marry him or if she’d turn him down? Last night she’d concluded she had no other choice.
Margaret fidgeted. She and John would leave today. John sat back in his chair, a smile twitching about his lips. What did he find so amusing?
Jade couldn’t take the strange atmosphere any longer. She rose from the table to go outside. As her strength returned, she had been seeking the outdoors more each day. Today, she sought the solitude of the swing Jason made for Tyler and Janey, and sat down.
Adjusting her skirts around her, Jade blinked back the tears filling her eyes. The air was warm for a late fall day, yet, it brought hint of the winter to come.
The canopy of dry leaves overhead crackled in the breeze. They fell to the ground and were scattered about like so many fallen dreams. If she accepted Jason’s offer this would be her world. No longer would she have dreams of what might have been before the darkness possessed her.
The ranch had come to represent a haven to her. At times, another house would slip passed her mind’s mental barrier only to disappear before it became a reality. A shadowy figure on the fringes of darkness, a gray ghostly image never in complete focus. How could she leave here, a sharp and clear present, to travel into the unknown?
A push with her toe set the swing in motion. Swinging slightly back and forth, she lost herself in thought. She needed to consider carefully what she would do to support herself and her child if she couldn’t bring herself to accept Jason’s offer, or worse, if he didn’t offer. After further consideration, he may have changed his mind.
Margaret would go back to town with her husband, which would leave Jade alone with Jason if she didn’t go with them. What would town hold for her? Nothing, she thought. If only she could remember her life before she came to the village. Her life before the Indian camp had disappeared into the darkness. When sleep claimed her, it hovered in the shadows just beyond her reach. She only knew that before the Indian village, fear and terror embroiled her life.
Each night the darkness encircled her with sounds and shapes she couldn’t name. But, fear, she knew fear, and fear kept her silent. The fear came silently, slithering around her, engulfing her until she wanted to scream, but couldn’t. Jade placed her hand on her head as if it hurt, not from pain, but from the darkness she knew existed there. Waiting to come for her in the stillness of the night. A tremor shook her. She closed her eyes against the knowledge of how helpless she was against the circumstances controlling her life.
When Jade left the room, Jason thumped his fingers on the table in an annoying rhythm. A habit he’d developed when he was nervous or unsure of himself. It had always irritated Margaret. The thumpty, thump, thump played against the table like a dissonant melody.
How was he going to approach Jade? What would he say? What would she say? If she was able to say anything at all. He worried about her not being able to speak. But, Margaret communicated with her without trouble, so it was an obstacle easily overcome, and she appeared intelligent. She and Emma had taken to each other well enough, so no problem there.
He had better get this done–the sooner the better and away from prying eyes. Time was running out. John and Margaret needed to leave, and he hoped Jade would say yes, so they could get married before his sister and her family left for home. He had plans to make for his and Emma’s future, as well as for Jade
and her child.
He knew what bothered him. What had him agonizing over what to say to Jade; his reaction to her. How would he make it through the winter in such close proximity to her and not be tempted beyond endurance? Would she agree to a real marriage? No, he should stay with his original plan of a ‘marriage of convenience’ and not scare her away. He needed her to stay, and if he would admit it, it wasn’t just for Emma.
Images of her danced through his mind, of her clutching the bodice of Margaret’s robe she wore over her thin nightgown. He smiled. The soft material couldn’t quite contain her full bosom, exposing more than it covered. He had become aware of the glances she kept casting his way, more so, since John’s arrival. The look on her face when Margaret introduced John as her husband and Jason as her ‘widowed brother’ was one of, what?-relief. Had she thought he was Margaret’s husband? Could she be the least bit attracted to him? The idea gave him pause. Maybe, just maybe, a marriage of convenience didn’t have to last forever.
~~~
Jason’s fingers stilled. The thumping stopped, to Margaret’s profound relief. Jason bolted to his feet, startling her, and raced to the backdoor.
“I’m going to talk to Jade,” he called out over his shoulder.
“Wait. What are you going to talk to her about?” Margaret asked.
Jason seemed in an odd mood. Now may not be a good time for him to try a one-way conversation with Jade. She didn’t want him saying or doing something to scare her away. It would ruin all her plans for them.
“Never you mind.”