“Are you all right?” Eiryn asked as she settled beside him. She tugged at her hair with her free hand.
“I’m fine. You’re heavy as a feather, that’s all.” The boy looked up at her and grinned, the floppy hat casting his face in even darker shadows. “Where’s Keilan-minnai, Arèn-minnoi?”
“I don’t know. I suppose she saw someone she wanted to talk to.”
“Oh.”
“I should get back to my classes,” Radèn said. “We’re doing outdoor demonstrations today.”
Eiryn hit the brim of his hat with Innas. “You said there was cake!”
“I didn’t say when.”
Which was very rude of him, Innas agreed. “Arèn-minnoi!”
Her uncle only laughed. “Why don’t you go with Radèn-minnoi and watch, Eiryn? There’ll be cake tonight.”
Eiryn thought better of pointing out that she wanted cake now and not tonight. She also thought better of pointing out that her uncle hadn’t given her any presents like Keilan-minnai and Radèn. “All right,” she said, sullenly. She didn’t even know what Radèn was going to be demonstrating in the first place, but she followed after him anyway and stubbornly ignored her uncle’s well-wishes. Perhaps, since it was her birthday, she could convince whoever was teaching Radèn that he deserved a day off and they could play games in the garden instead.
“Orryn-minnaoi!” Eiryn called out when she spotted their teacher a little ahead of them. Ao stopped and turned as Eiryn bounded up to aon. “I’m five today!” Eiryn was bouncing on her toes. “So now I’m a lady.”
“Blessed birthday, then, Eiryn-minnai. That is a very big day indeed. Are you coming to watch Radèn demonstrate what he’s learned along with Kerra-minnai’s other students?” Orryn-minnaoi smiled at them both, though aos eyes were fixed on Radèn. Eiryn felt a little grumbly at that. It was her birthday.
Still, she nodded at her tutor’s question. She wanted to see what Radèn was going to demonstrate. “But I don’t know what they’re going to do.”
“Beat Janyn bloody,” Radèn muttered from behind her and the snarl made Eiryn’s chest hurt so much she threw herself against Orryn-minnaoi and shuffled behind aon to hide. Ao slid a hand back to lie on her shoulder reassuringly, the bangles on aos wrist clinking softly.
“You will do no such thing.” Aos voice brooked no argument, but Eiryn knew Radèn’s moods by now. He’d spoken in that tone that said he wouldn’t listen to anyone. And Janyn was bigger and stronger and Radèn was always getting into fights with him. “You don’t solve problems by using violence.”
Radèn-minnoi’s voice was too low a grumble for Eiryn to make out the words, but she pressed herself against Orryn-minnaoi more tightly until ao gently moved her beside aon. She clung tightly to aos hand and looked from boy to adult uncertainly. Nothing happened.
Orryn-minnaoi guided her down the path and out onto one of the largest lawns. Her teacher found her a nice sheltered spot to sit in, though the wind wasn’t so bad yet and the sun was still keeping everyone company. Radèn had turned aside to the other children who’d be demonstrating their stick skills. Eiryn had never seen Radèn practice before. All she understood from what she saw was that it involved hitting against another stick. Some of the children seemed to have begun already and it looked very dangerous.
Orryn-minnaoi didn’t leave her sitting on her own, quite, but ao did drift off a way to talk to an adult Eiryn didn’t know. She thought about following her teacher. The stranger wasn’t wearing any sash to tell Eiryn how to address them. So she hesitated. She didn’t want to say the wrong thing by accident. Besides, some of the other children in the palace had begun to gather where she sat and distracted her with their chattering.
Bunren-minnaoi settled almost right beside her and she startled away just a little. The tarènaoi looked different that day, happier. Eiryn pulled up her legs and tried to make herself invisible. Perhaps if she were invisible then ao wouldn’t notice her or call her sifanou again.
Before long, though, her worries were interrupted when one of the eldest girls in the class, Illyneis-minnai, settled between Eiryn and Bunren. Radèn and the other children were waving their sticks around in what Eiryn could just make out was a pattern. They weren’t all moving at the same time, but she was impressed by it all the same. Maybe there was supposed to be a pattern in there too. Eiryn didn’t know. The children on the grass moved almost perfectly. Illyneis started talking to Bunren, while Eiryn tried to make herself even smaller. Repeating farakaoina to herself did not manage to shut out the noise, however. Before long she knew more about what Bunren-minnaoi’s parents let aon do or not do than she’d ever wanted to know.
“Blessed birthday,” Illyneis whispered suddenly. With a start, Eiryn turned her head to look at the other girl. She hadn’t noticed that the two children had stopped speaking to one another, and it took Eiryn a moment to realise that yes, Illyneis was talking to her. The other girl was smiling and holding out a small, cloth-wrapped disc of some sort. Eiryn stared at it. “It’s for you.”
“Thank you.” Taking the gift gingerly, Eiryn put it on her lap. She carefully tugged her hair back into place and looked at the cloth. Illyneis-minnai tended to keep to herself almost as much as Eiryn did; she’d never really talked to the other girl before. But Illyneis didn’t make Eiryn feel like she wanted to run or hide the way Janyn did. So she moved Innas to the crook of her elbow and started to pull on the knot that kept the white cloth tied. It was a very tight knot and Illyneis-minnai had to help Eiryn pull it free in the end, so that the gift almost fell from their grasp.
Illyneis caught it and held it out for Eiryn to take. The gift was a piece of shell the size of Eiryn’s hand and had a picture of a brown-furred animal painted onto it. The animal looked like a cat, only spotted and twice the size. “Thank you,” Eiryn repeated with less confusion and more sincerity. It was lovely. She had nothing to put the gift in, though, so she left it lying on her lap.
“My grandmother painted it,” Illyneis-minnai said. “I thought of you when I saw it.” She didn’t explain, but Eiryn might have asked her to had not Kerra-minnai announced loudly that they’d be pairing off students now that they’d gone through their warm-up exercises. Radèn-minnoi was up first. Eiryn was certain that was because his mother didn’t want him to demonstrate out in the sunshine. He wasn’t wearing his floppy hat at all. Maybe the demonstration could show them all Radèn didn’t need to wear any stupid hats every time he went out. That would be a great birthday present!
But her heart almost stopped when Kerra-minnai announced that Radèn would be partnered with Janyn. Illyneis put a hand on Eiryn’s knee, though it made Eiryn fidget rather than offer her reassurance. Illyneis didn’t look particularly calm either. Eiryn thought about looking for Orryn-minnaoi and asking aon to take her back inside, where Radèn had promised her there would be cake, but she didn’t dare.
Instead she hugged Innas and her new piece of shell close and decided that she didn’t want to see after all. Pulling up her knees, Eiryn pressed her face against them and hummed farakaoina under her breath. Very softly because she didn’t want to distract anyone, but it was enough for her not to flinch and scream at the sound of stick hitting stick. She hoped it was stick hitting stick. The sound punctuated the farakaoina she was singing so completely that Eiryn settled into those that fit the rhythm the two boys were making.
She did scream, almost, when someone put a large hand on her shoulder, but it was only Orryn-minnaoi asking her if she was all right. Though Eiryn wanted to nod and say that everything was fine, she couldn’t do it. Her knees made it harder to shake her head and it make her eyes hurt even more, but she was afraid to look up. “This wasn’t such a good idea, was it?” Orryn-minnaoi said, though ao didn’t sound angry or upset. Ao scooped her right off the ground and held her close. “Do you want to go see Radèn?”
Eiryn wasn’t sure, but Orryn-minnaoi wa
s already carrying her away from where she was, so she didn’t answer. She did manage a small wave at Illyneis-minnai, but the other girl was following them at a distance and Eiryn felt a little silly for doing it. Bunren-minnaoi followed too, so it was a small procession that traversed the edges of the field to where the children who’d finished with their demonstration were waiting for the others. Orryn-minnaoi put Eiryn down when they reached the low rope that marked the boundary of the practice field.
When Eiryn spotted Radèn sitting under a tree, she grabbed Illyneis-minnai’s arm and dragged her along to where he was sitting. He looked perfectly fine. Illyneis-minnai fidgeted when they were there, but Radèn asked them both what they’d thought of the demonstration and the older girl was soon chatting away. Eiryn snuggled against Radèn and didn’t interrupt Illyneis’ story. She hadn’t seen, after all, and she didn’t want Radèn to know she’d been too scared to watch. Orryn-minnaoi said aos goodbyes to them all and Eiryn did wave aon off then, but mostly she stayed close to Radèn and tried to let the boy’s calm seep into her. She’d like to hear what he was telling Illyneis-minnai about the fight he’d had with Janyn, but it scared her so.
Suddenly, Radèn-minnoi tensed up; Eiryn could feel him. It wasn’t until she heard Janyn say “Can I see your doll?” that she tensed herself. “Please?”
“Leave her alone. She’s not going to show you anything.” Radèn’s voice, storming just below the surface.
“I was asking Eiryn-minnai. Perhaps you should let her make her own decisions.”
With difficulty, Eiryn made herself sit up straight. She didn’t want Radèn to get into another fight, and Janyn seemed almost shy. “Why?” she asked, though it took her a few times to get the word out audibly and without wanting to burst into tears and hide. She was five today. She was a lady now. Ladies were supposed to be brave and strong because they had to take care of the whole family.
“I just want to see how it’s made.” He didn’t seem like he was about to call her bad things. All the same, she didn’t trust Janyn. He’d been nice to her a few times, but he usually wasn’t. “I want to make a doll too. You know my aunt, Mystá-minnai?”
Eiryn shook her head. Though the name sounded a bit familiar, so perhaps her uncle knew her.
“She says she’s expecting a baby.”
“Liar,” Radèn hissed under his breath. Eiryn scooted a little further away to clear her head. She knew Radèn definitely wouldn’t lie to her, but she also knew he and Janyn had hated one another even before she’d come to class. And Radèn was a finger-snap away from jumping up and attacking the other boy; it was why she’d created some distance between them. She didn’t like the way it made her feel inside, all churning and roiling like she was a wave about to crash into a cliff.
“I won’t do anything except look,” Janyn said. “I know I’ve been mean to you a lot and I don’t blame you for not trusting me.” Eiryn frowned; something about his words sounded off, hollow. “I’m sure it’d mean so much to my aunt and her baby to have a special doll.”
With her free hand, Eiryn tugged on her hair and with the other she held Innas closer. She didn’t want to give Innas to Janyn, not at all, and she didn’t trust him, but. He was making such a sad face at her. What if he was telling the truth? Eiryn could help someone get a doll they loved just as much as she loved Innas then. That wasn’t a bad thing to do. “You promise?” Her voice quavered and she could feel Radèn tensing beside her even from that distance. “You have to promise on the Balance that you won’t hurt Innas.”
Someone, Eiryn couldn’t tell who, gasped, but Janyn only nodded and said, “I swear on the Balance that I’ll only look to see how Innas is made. And if I break my word may I be punished accordingly.”
“Don’t –” Radèn said when she held out her doll, but Janyn had already taken Innas in his hands before the other boy was able to intervene. Radèn was standing beside Eiryn now, though, and he had his fists clenched at his sides. Eiryn wasn’t sure what to do. She wanted to bolt away from her friend, but she didn’t dare take her eyes off Janyn. The older boy was turning Innas over in his hands.
Ao wasn’t a very pretty doll, not really. Dai had made aon especially for Eiryn when she’d become pregnant again. She’d said it was so that Eiryn could practice having a little sister around. Dai’d said she wasn’t very good at making things, but Eiryn hadn’t cared. It was her mother’s gift to her and that made it more special than anything. And now Janyn held Innas in his hands. He plucked at the green dress carefully. Eiryn’s heart had stopped when he’d first pulled at the dress, but he didn’t try to take it off.
All the same, fear dried Eiryn’s throat and made her shift from foot to foot. She didn’t dare tug on her hair, which meant her hands fluttered up and down while she tried to figure out what to do with them. She wanted Innas back, even though Janyn didn’t seem to be doing anything but turn Innas around and see how dai’d made the dress.
“Give aon back,” Radèn said. The boy had gritted his teeth so much he barely managed to make himself understood, but Eiryn heard him all the same. Janyn didn’t listen, of course. He just turned Innas over in his hands and looked at aon.
“Is it hard to sew a doll?” Janyn asked.
“I don’t know. Dai made it for me. Can I have aon back, Janyn-minnoi?” Her hands reached for the shell in her sash. She’d twisted Illyneis-minnai’s gift into it so she wouldn’t lose it. Eiryn just wanted something to hold and keep her hands still. “I want Innas back now.”
“Ao must be a very special doll,” Janyn said, and then the world went off-kilter entirely. Eiryn could hear there was something sharp to the boy’s voice and it would have worried her except that as he’d said it he moved his hands and Radèn dove at him from beside her. He tackled Janyn to the ground with a loud cry. Eiryn didn’t understand anything of what was happening save that Janyn and Radèn were fighting and Innas was somewhere in that fight. Only then Innas was on the ground and – and –
Then Illyneis-minnai was holding Innas and there were bits of white wool fallen to the ground and bits of down floating where the breeze took them and there were adults and other children pressing around them making noises that didn’t make any sense to Eiryn at all. She could see people’s mouths moving, but that was all. She was scared and angry and confused and a little bit excited, only she wasn’t any of those things save scared and confused. Everyone around her was responding to the two boys who’d gotten into a fight and no one was paying any attention to Innas or to her. Not even while she was screaming as loudly as she could.
It was Kerra-minnai who finally pulled the two boys apart and Anou-minnoi who took Eiryn by the arm and led her away while the petite woman dealt with Radèn and Janyn. Anou-minnoi’s grip on Eiryn’s arm was firm as he steered her away. It hurt a little. When Eiryn tried to turn and see whether Radèn was all right, Anou-minnoi’s free hand snaked around her shoulders and propelled her even faster. The old man led Eiryn from the courtyard and further into the gardens until there was not a sound from everyone’s shouting and a bench for them to sit on.
“This is far enough, I think.” Anou-minnoi didn’t sit down, but he did let go of Eiryn’s arm. She could run away, if she wanted to. She’d probably be fast enough to outrun Anou-minnoi if she really wanted to. She’d only ever seen him shuffle anywhere, except for that one night he took her out into the gardens maybe. Arèn-minnoi and Keilan-minnai would never have let her go to make sure she wouldn’t run. And Anou-minnoi was cold. He was shivering, so Eiryn guided him to a bench nicely sheltered from the wind and untied her sash for him like he’d done for her.
“Thank you, child.” Anou-minnoi patted the stone beside him and Eiryn soon found herself seated on his lap, both their sashes untied and wrapped around their shoulders for warmth.
“Can you tell me what happened, Eiryn-minnai?”
At first she shook her head, but then the words came tumb
ling out anyway. She wasn’t entirely sure of what happened because it had all gone so fast, but she did know Janyn had wanted to see her doll and he’d promised. He’d promised. Eiryn couldn’t explain why she’d believed him. Janyn was Janyn and even dai broke promises, so Janyn certainly would. But Eiryn had trusted his word and now she didn’t have Innas anymore and she wanted dai so so so much.
Anou-minnoi stroked her hair and gently swung his legs until one of her sobs turned into a giggle and then back into a sob. “Do you want to hear a story?”
“I want Innas.” But she burrowed against his chest a little deeper and wrapped her arms around him. Anou-minnoi was warmer than Innas, though much bigger. “I want dai.”
“I know, child. Shall we look for your doll? You’ll have to let me go if you want to,” he added after she’d nodded. “You’re too heavy for me to carry.” So Eiryn slid off Anou-minnoi’s lap and slipped her hand into his. She didn’t retie her sash, even after he’d draped it over her shoulders and he’d retied his own. She knew she should, but it gave her other hand something to hold too and that made her feel a little better. So she didn’t.
Side-by-side they walked back to where the demonstration had been held. The crowd was gone by the time they got there and several people were packing everything away. At the archway, Eiryn stopped and pulled back. She didn’t have to put all her weight into it this time because Anou-minnoi stopped when she did. “You don’t want to come and see?”
She shook her head. Anou-minnoi squatted down until he was a little lower than her. He grimaced a little as he did, but he was all smile when he looked up and the sincerity threw her. Before she could blurt out a question, though, Anou-minnoi was already speaking. “You don’t have to come. Just describe to me what Innas looks like and I’ll ask about your doll. You can stay here and wait. I doubt I’ll be long.”
A Promise Broken Page 15