“I think I’m falling in love with you Bella and am I right in thinking that possibly you feel the same?”
I think actions speak louder than words so we kissed again, this time long and passionate. We walked back to my home and had a night cap. The next morning I prepared a picnic and Richard and I took the children to the zoo for the day. They really enjoyed their day and Richard was extremely good with them and they seemed to really like him.
The next morning Richard had to leave and go back home. I was disappointed although I knew he had to go at some point. After he went back, we chatted daily on the phone. Richard told me Simon had returned from New York for a while and was staying there with him. I knew I had some feelings for Richard, however, I was confused because he was Simon’s brother. I tried to keep my feelings to myself because I didn’t want to get hurt again and I certainly didn’t want to give Richard the wrong signals.
I decided to take the children to New York with me to visit
Violet. Anthony took me to one side and asked me for my blessing as he was planning to propose to Violet. Despite thinking she was a little too young for marriage I gave my blessings. Anthony was a lovely young man and from I could see he had a very good influence on her.
I felt much better after a good nights sleep. The children were still rather sleepy after our long journey so I let them sleep a bit longer.
Once I got Liam and Bella up and dressed I jumped into the shower. I wasn’t expecting to find what I did .While washing myself I found a lump in my breast. I tried to keep calm and enjoy my holiday with Violet and the kids.
That evening Anthony took us to a restaurant in Time Square called Casa Nona, an authentic Italian experience. The food was superb and we had a fantastic bottle of white wine with our food. Before our desserts were bought out, Anthony pulled out a small box with a diamond and sapphire ring inside and proposed to Violet. The smile on her face said everything and of course she accepted.
Anthony is a writer for a newspaper and I know he will look after her. Violet has always wanted to make her home in New York and now she is with a lovely man.
I only hope she doesn’t make the same mistakes as I have.
Over the next week I tried to enjoy myself with everyone
but I couldn’t get the lump I’d found out of my mind. I decided to phone Lizzie and confide in her.
She told me to return home as soon as possible and go and see my doctor. I decided to cut the holiday short and return back to England. Once we arrived home I went to see Doctor Matthews and told him about the lump. He referred me to see a specialist at the hospital in my home town. I had to have a mammogram which was extremely uncomfortable and then an ultrasound scan which showed up a small mass in my breast. He decided to do a biopsy and sent it off for further examination.
Fortunately everything was done within two days so I didn`t have to wait long before the results were back. Lizzie came with me to give me some moral support. We sat in the waiting room for about fifteen minutes before the doctor called me to his room. I was so nervous and scared. Lizzie held my hand as the specialist told me my results. I had a lump which had been found to be cancerous. I would need chemotherapy and hormone therapy treatment every couple of days for about three months and then every three weeks.
I had to start the treatment immediately. I decided not to tell
Roy and the children. The only person who knew was
Lizzie.
I knew there was a possibility I would lose my hair
and then I would have no choice but to tell the kids.
My treatment started the next day. It was awful and It made me feel very sick; however I wanted to live and I would do anything to survive. I felt constantly drained and lethargic and couldn’t do very much.
After a few weeks my hair started to fall out in big chunks and the children started to ask me questions. I just told them I had a problem with my hair. Violet told me she was coming home with Anthony for a holiday so I knew I would have to tell her when she got here.
When she arrived she knew straight away that something was wrong, so I had no choice but to tell her.
She was very upset and cried like a baby. I tried to reassure her by saying that the treatment should work and I would be fine. I never told the younger children as they wouldn`t have understood anyway.
Roy has been away for a few months on business; however, he was due back soon. I was four months into my treatment and the specialist was very happy with my progress. Violet
decided to stay for a while to offer help and support, but Anthony had to go back to New York because of his work.
I still hadn’t heard from Simon so he didn’t know about my illness and I told Lizzie not to say anything to him if he called. I also told her not to tell Roy as I wanted to tell him myself.
When he arrived home, I asked him to come and see me. I tried to break the news as gently as possible. He was very upset that I hadn’t told him earlier.
After a few weeks my treatment was nearly over. I told Violet to go back to New York because she had a job to ger back too. Lizzie and Roy offered to go with me for my results to see if my cancer had gone. I was on tender hooks waiting for the news. The waiting room was busy and everyone there was in the same position as me. One lady came out crying and I wasn’t sure whether her news was good or bad. Hospitals are not the nicest of places and everything is so clinical. When my name was called, Lizzie squeezed my hand and Roy gave me a hopeful smile. I told them to wait there as I preferred to go in alone.
Mr Davies my specialist greeted me with a smile, and sat down.
“Please take a seat Mrs Ferrari. How have you been feeling? He got my notes out and put his glasses on.
I said nothing, I wanted to scream; just tell me if I am going to live or die.
“Ok, apart from the usual sickness and fatigue.” I answered nervously.
He looked up from his notes and smiled.
“I am pleased to tell you that you’re in remission.” I wanted to hug him, I was so relieved.
“Do you have any questions?
“No doctor, the only thing I want now, is to go and live my life.” I realised at that moment just how precious life was. Lizzie and Roy were still waiting anxiously in the waiting room when I walked out of the doctor’s room. They knew as soon as they saw me that the news was good.
We left the hospital beaming and went home. That evening we celebrated big time.
The next evening the front door bell rang and when I answered it, Richard was standing there. As soon as he saw me he knew I’d been ill. I invited him in and explained about my cancer and that I was now in remission. After I put the children to bed Lizzie offered to babysit although I got the feeling she didn’t really like Richard, despite not really taking the time to get to know him.He took me to our local pub for a drink to celebrate my news.
After only a few drinks I started to feel quite tipsy. This was the first time I had touched alcohol since having cancer.
“Have you heard anything from Simon?” I asked.
“I was going to ask you the same thing.”
“Last time I heard, he was staying with you and your dad. He hasn’t been in touch with me, but he called Lizzie a few months ago. She hasn’t heard from him since and he isn’t answering his calls. I hope he’s ok!”
I decided to call Barbara and she told me she was on a cruise and the last time she’d heard from Simon was six weeks ago. That’s a long time. I even tried Victoria and she knew nothing either. Richard decided to call all of Simon’s friends, maybe he was with one of them; however no one had heard from him. The only thing we could do was report him missing. Richard came with me to the police station and we filed a missing person report. They told me Simon would only be found if he wanted to be. I was more worried that something had happened to him.
Richard decided to stay a few weeks and wait to see if
Simon turned up. Lizzie asked if there was something going on between Richard a
nd me. I told her nothing was going on and we were just friends. It had been a while since I’d had a relationship, and it wasn’t long after, that my divorce came through from Claudio.
That evening Richard and I went for a walk, it was autumn time and the leaves were falling off the trees. We walked along the beach and he took my hand. I couldn’t get Simon out of my mind and I was worried about him. Richard noticed my quiet mood and asked me if I was ok. Hot tears sprung in my eyes and I couldn’t help it. Everything over the last few years hit me like a ton of bricks. He must have felt uncomfortable. Richard laid out his coat and we sat down on the sand looking out to sea. The night was rather warm for autumn, however, the sky looked full of rain. We thought it would be a good idea to head back home. We were near my street when I could see Lizzie outside talking to someone. We ran to the house, Lizzie was talking to a police man. Apparently Simon hadn’t used any of his bank cards for six weeks. It was then that I realised things were serious.
That night none of us could sleep and we were all concerned
of Simon’s whereabouts.I hadn’t seen or spoken to him since we were on the sea front. I phoned Violet and told her Simon was missing. She told me she would be on the next available flight and come home.
Richard and I phoned everyone we could think of, but nobody had heard from him. Violet arrived two days later and told me that the date was set for her wedding and they had decided on Christmas. I told her the timing wasn`t exactly right to talk about that, with Simon still missing.
Violet stayed for her birthday and Anthony arrived the day after. I decided to take everyone out to the local seafood restaurant. Everybody was in sombre mood and worried about Simon. We were all hoping he would walk in through the door at any moment, but he didn’t. As the weeks passed, there was no news on him.
I thought I had spotted Simon on a few occasions; however Violet thought it was just wishful thinking on my behalf. I knew he had to be somewhere.
Roy has arrived and he has a new lady friend. He still misses Tammy very much; we all do. She was an exceptional woman and a good mother to us all.
Time passed by and Violet informed me she was pregnant.
Nine months later she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl on the twenty first of March. They named her Ruby and she is beautiful, she looks just like Violet. She stayed in hospital for three days and was then allowed home with baby Ruby.
With a new baby in the house, things were a bit chaotic, so I helped Violet as much as I could.
Ruby was soon three weeks old and was changing every day.
Eventually I returned home and decided to sell my house and move away. All the memories I had there were too much.
Violet asked me to move to New York to be near her, however, when I lived there before, I got terribly home sick. Lizzie popped in for coffee and told me not to sell the house but to rent it out instead; that way if I wanted to return home I could. I became very close to Lizzie as over the years she had always been there for me when I needed her, without judging me one little bit. I felt torn between England and being with Violet in New York. After sometime I made my decision to go and give New York another try. Moving there was the best move I ever made.
The children were much happier and Lizzie also moved with me and was very lucky to find a job as a beautician almost immediately. I opened up a little coffee shop and it was doing very well. Richard often kept in touch by email and phone calls. Roy stayed in New York more than in England. He liked being close to his family.
Ruby was six months old and kept her parents on their toes.
We started to wonder if we would ever see Simon again. He seemed to have vanished of the face of the earth.
I finally came to terms with the situation and Richard told me that if he were to see him he would be tell me immediately.
Over the next few weeks I was kept very busy in the coffee shop. Business was booming. Thank heavens the children were both at school full time.
A few days later Richard called to say he was coming to see me. When he arrived at the airport I went to pick him up. I was quite shocked at his response in seeing me; he gave me a big hug and a kiss. I didn’t exactly know how to react. I just stood there with butterflies in my stomach. I showed him my new coffee shop then took him to my apartment on West 34th Street New York, the one that Roy had bought many years ago and that I’d decided to keep.
I took Richard out for a meal that evening with the children and Lizzie. I was happy and surprised to see Lizzie really making an effort to get to know him..
After I showed him Time Square and he was amazed with the bright lights of the city. Richard asked me on a real date with me, however, I refused because I knew Simon was still somewhere and until he was found dead or alive I felt I couldn’t move on with my life.
Lizzie told me she received a phone call from Ben and was coming to visit New York for a few weeks. She seemed very excited about it especially because she now knew she wasn’t related to him and nothing could come between them incase they hit it off again
After all the attempts Richard made to date me I finally gave in. How could I not have? He was an amazing guy, with all the qualities I wanted in a man. He did so much for me and had always comforted and supported me when I needed a friend. He showed me how much he cared and he even told me numerous times that he was in love with me. I knew I had to forget Simon once and for all and move on with my life. Like the police said; he would only be found if he wanted to be.
We agreed to meet before the sunrise, the sun was peaking out over the horizon, and you could see the first rays of sun grace the earth. Before your eyes, the clouds became lit with a fabulous warm light, as the rising sun announced the coming of a new day, and a new Chapter of my life. Richard took my hand and we walked along the beach. Even though it was our first official date, I knew that we had fallen in love long before. Richard decided to move to New York and our relationship did nothing but blossom.
One day we were standing in the middle of Times Square and Richard told me to look to the left. I couldn't believe my eyes. There on a huge screen, written were the words;
Will you marry me Bella?
I looked at Richard and he was down on one knee, smiling the smile that made my knees wobble. Just like Simon’s smile.
“Well? Will you marry me? ”
“Yes, yes and yes.” I answered happily.
The ring was just as I imagined; eighteen carat gold, antique with five diamonds in a gypsy setting.
Our engagement party was the following Saturday. Roy organised it at his place in New York. He hired a marquee and staff; there was enough food to feed an army.
“I want to make this as special as possible for you! You deserve to be happy again Bella, after all the drama you’ve been through.”
As I stood next to Richard, I could see from the look in his eye and by the way he held me, that his love for me was so pure.,As we were dancing, the music went silent and everybody stopped and stared, I thought at first they were looking at us dancing.
But as I glanced to the door I saw a blast from the past. Simon stood there looking at us both with tears in his eyes; my heart skipped a beat when I saw how sad he looked. Why did he have to show up now? It was as though I was being punished for finding happiness with Richard. Simon walked across the dance floor towards us both and glared at Richard.
“What the hell is going on here?” He shouted.
“How dare you come here and ask that question when you have been gone for so long. Bella was so unhappy after you disappeared, she turned to me for comfort and over time we fell in love. This is our engagement party, I love Bella dearly and I know she feels the same about me. We are getting married as soon as possible. You had your chance Simon, but blew it. You’re my brother, but you never even let me know where you were. I know everything there is to know, that Robert and Liam are your children. Bella has told me everything. There aren’t any secrets between us and she can finally feel at ease.”
I just stood there listening.
“If you’d been any kind of man you would’ve been there for your children.”
I looked at Simon with tears in my eyes.
“Do you realise how hard this has been for me? I couldn’t tell you all those years ago that Robert was also your child and I had to grieve for him alone. When I told you Liam was yours, you just walked away and left me standing there. You don’t deserve to be a father; at least our father loved you and Lizzie and bought you up as his own”
Richard and I walked away and left him standing there just as he did to me all those years ago.
Ben moved to New York and moved in with Lizzie it turned out that the spark between them had never disappeared. He found a place nearby and decided to open up a new fashion house with all his own designs. As he and Lizzie had been childhood sweethearts and had been his first love; he decided to call his new design label.
‘Lizzie.’
It didn’t take long for word of mouth to get around and people were soon lining up for his designs.The label ‘Lizzie,’ became famous in the fashion world.
They eventually got married and moved to a beautiful penthouse apartment not far from mine.
As Richard was in the business of property developing it didn’t take long for him to also become well known in his field, his forte was renovating old mansions to their original glory.
After buying an old mansion for ourselves and doing it up, we decided to sell our apartment and move in to the mansion. It stood in an acre of ground and thought it would be a good place to keep horses. I opened up a riding school and Lizzie and Violet decided to help in this new venture. It didn’t take long for Lizzie to sell her shop and as Violet needed something to do, it seemed like the ideal situation.
After we all received some training to open the business, everything fell into place.
When the business was approaching the first year, we decided to open the riding school for children . One day a woman arrived with a beautiful little boy about five years old, she said he was from the local orphanage and had been chosen out of all the children to be given the opportunity to learn to ride a horse. His name was Andrew James but everyone called him AJ, he was a beautiful child with blonde curly hair and big blue eyes. Lizzie instantly took to him and she became his personal teacher.
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