Tattered Love (Needle's Kiss)

by Stark, Lola

  “Why not? You said she was hot I heard you. You told Uncle Trip she was hot, and Uncle Mace was a lucky B word,” he asked, genuinely confused.

  “Shit, sorry Scar. They hear every word you utter when you don’t want them to, but ask them to take out the trash, they suddenly become deaf.” He clamped his hand over Jordan’s mouth and apologized looking at Scarlett.

  “Don’t worry about it, Jude, really. You have two of the most handsome little guys.”

  Jordan looked up, pulled his father’s hand and smiled, making his dimples pop out. “Hear that, Dad? She wants me.” This started another round of laughter and Jude shooing Jordan off towards the party food. Jaxson followed quietly behind him still watching Scarlett with a look of wonder on his face.

  “Think someone has a crush on you, babe.” I laughed, watching Jude try to wrangle the boys without any injuries or more embarrassment.

  “They’re cute kids. Jordan’s clearly not shy. Jaxson has beautiful eyes though.” He did, big bright green eyes that took in the world. He paid attention to everything from the moment he was born.

  “You wanna help me watch them next week? I promised Jude I’d take ‘em for a night.”

  “Sure, how much trouble can two little boys be?”

  “Famous last words, babe,” I chuckled. She had no idea just what she was in for. Jaxson might be quiet at first, but that quickly changed once he let you in.

  We had spent the better part of the night attached to each other. It didn’t matter where we were or what was happening; I felt calmer when she was in my grasp. Hearing her laughing and joking was just a bonus. Scarlett grounded me, took away all my worries with just the touch of her skin to mine.

  We said our goodbyes and headed for the parking lot. Scarlett snuck her hand into my pocket and retrieved her car keys. As we approached, she stopped dead in her tracks.

  “What the fuck!” she yelled and stormed over to where I had parked the car. My great mood vanished the instant I took in the sight before me.

  Fuck!

  My car!

  It had been vandalized. All four of the tires had been slashed, my windows smashed out and scratch marks all down the sides, deep enough that you could see the silver underneath. My stomach dropped the second I saw it; the tears that threatened to fall, now slid down my face. My baby! Who the hell would do this? I didn’t have any enemies.

  Mace’s strong warm arms wrapped around me as he stepped up behind me and took the keys from my shaking hands. He kissed the top of my head and passed me off to Trip. Apparently, my yell had drawn a crowd from the party. I watched as Mace took out his cell and called somebody; he moved a distance from me so I couldn’t make out his words, but it was clear that they weren’t nice; the scowl on his face told me he wasn’t happy with whoever he was speaking to. After a few more moments, he hung up the phone, came back over to us and Teeny took over holding me up while Trip and Mace inspected the car.

  “It’ll be okay, Scar. We can fix this,” Teeny told me, handing me a tissue from her oversized bag. “You do need to call the police though and a tow truck.”

  “Tow truck is on its way, so are the police” Mace took me back into his arms and held me tight to his chest.

  A little while later, the police arrived and took statements. Luckily, the restaurant had surveillance. The police would look over it to see if they caught the asshole that vandalized my poor car. The entire time through the questioning, Mace had been quietly standing with me. Once finished, he walked off with an officer. They had a quick conversation; immediately, I felt like something was off. He was mad as hell but there was something else.

  He made his way back to me and asked, “You need anything outta the car before they tow it, babe?” I shook my head in the negative before he turned and handed the driver the keys to my car with specific instructions to deliver it to a body shop I’d never heard of.

  Teeny waited around while everything was taken care of waiting to drive us home. I hadn’t gotten close enough to get a really good look at all the damage, but my baby would be off the road for a while—at least a few weeks. Fuck it! I couldn’t believe somebody would do something so low. I had stopped crying and shaking, but then I was just mad and a little sad. The car could be fixed, yes, but all that ran through my head was the hours of hard work I had put in with my father.

  Leaning against Teeny’s car waiting for Mace to finish up with the tow truck, she asked, “You okay, sweetie?”

  “No, they went after the one thing that means the most to me, Teen. My car was the last thing I had left of my dad. It was ours,” I told her. Turning to get in the car as I slid into the back seat, I noticed Mace had been standing behind me, a hardened look on his face.

  Outside my house, I waved Teeny off as Mace opened the front door and dumped my handbag on the front table. I walked inside, spun around and asked, “Why have you been so quiet? Talk to me.”

  He shook his head. “I’m damn sure it was Janelle who fucked your car up, babe.”

  “Why would she even do that? What did I do to her?”

  “It’s the kind of bitch she is, babe. This is about me, not you; I told you I wouldn’t let my shit affect you. This is my shit, not yours.” His voice was so low I almost missed it.

  “Don’t let her do that to you. It’s just a car, Mace. It can be fixed” I felt the need to make light of the destruction, even though it broke my heart and cut me deeply. I searched his face. Dread filled me. Something was wrong. Really wrong.

  He grabbed me and kissed me gently, holding me close in his arms. There was a sadness in his eyes I didn’t quite understand, almost as if—no, he wouldn’t. I opened my mouth to speak when he cut me off.

  “I’m a walking tragedy. Everything I touch turns to shit. I don’t want that for you, Scar.” He swallowed hard, turned and walked out the front door, leaving me speechless, watching after him and hoping this was some bad joke.

  Mace just left me.

  I felt the tears trickle down my face. The lump in my throat making it hard to swallow, I crumpled to my knees.

  “Get your stupid good for nothing ass off that fuckin couch right now, asshole!” My head snapped up from the cell in my hand.

  “Fuck you! What the hell’s your problem?” Trip stormed in the house and slammed the front door, the only warning I got before he started yelling. Trip moved in close and put his face in mine. “You did this to yourself. You had a good thing with her, but you fucked it all up the ass. Now, you’ve either gotta live with it or fix it.”

  One of the hardest things I’d done was walk away from Scarlett. Leaving her was like sticking a knife in my own heart. Trying to stick to my decision was almost as hard it was tearing me apart. The days she was angry were easier. Seeing her stomping around slamming doors, blasting angry music, I could deal with that. The days she came and went looking as broken as I felt, were hard to watch.

  “I can’t fix it; she’s better off without me and my shit.”

  “So find Janelle and get it sorted out. She’s made your life hell for too many years. She’s the reason you’re messed up, blaming yourself for Belle, taking your money, which by the way, is total fucking bullshit. Now, you’re just going to let her take from you again?”

  “It is my fucking fault Janelle went after Scar!” My temper flared. I was gripping the beer in my hand tight enough that it might explode at any moment.

  “Your fault? How the hell is any of this your damn fault, you moron?” he hissed, his finger pointing into my face.

  “It fucking is! It’s my fault because I cut Janelle off. I stopped the cash flow and told her I was done. I wasn’t supporting her anymore. I wanted her out of my life for good. She threatened to make my life hell and she has. I can’t find her to put a stop to it, and she isn’t answering her cell. The safest thing to do is stay away from Scarlett, for her own good.” I knew Janelle would retaliate; it was the kind of bitch she was, but I never thought she’d take it out on Scarlett. All I wanted was
to start a life with Scar, make her happy. I wanted that happily ever after. With her.

  “You can’t control everything, Mace. You need to accept that, and Scarlett wanted you regardless. She loves you. That’s hard to find, brother. Don’t give up on it”.

  “I do know. I just don’t want to be the reason she gets hurt,” I told him quietly.

  “Well it’s too fuckin’ late for that.” Wait! What? I had no idea what he was on about. The thought something had happened to Scarlett crossed my mind. I instantly jumped up grabbing him by the shirt.

  “What do you mean too late? Fuck. Is Scarlett hurt? Why didn’t you say something?” I yelled in his face, pushing him out of my way and making for the front door. Blood rushing in my ears, a sharp pain in my chest at the thought of Scarlett hurt.

  “Stop, you idiot! She’s not hurt like you think.” Stopping dead in my tracks, I spun around, adrenaline still rushing through me.

  “Spit it the fuck out before I beat it outta you.” My conflicting feelings were turning me into an ass and I knew it, but that didn’t mean I could do a whole lot about it.

  Trip let out a sigh, running his hand through his Mohawk. “She’s had shit happening. The other day, I saw her entire front garden was ripped out. I know she didn’t do it. She broke down at work. Scar doesn’t cry, Mace. I held onto her while she lost it. She’s really hurting.”

  “I’m doing it for her own good; do you think I want to hurt her?” Flopping down on the couch I held my head in my hands. I couldn’t keep doing this to either of us, something had to give.

  “That’s not all. I just went over there when she didn’t show for work this morning and she sounded like shit on the phone. I found her hung over an empty bottle which was smashed up on her back deck. There’s graffiti all over the place. I’m not talking a little bit, Mace. The entire back deck wall was covered. Even the word ‘slut’ in huge ass letters. It’s a mess, dude. She’s a mess”.

  “Come again?”

  “I think there’s more going on with Scar than she’s telling me. She didn’t want anyone to know what’s happened. Look, she’s a grown woman, but she’s still Scar, She’s like a little sister to me and you know that. I’m really worried she’s in trouble. She won’t let anyone help. Shit, I had to sneak up on her to find out what little I did.”

  My anger flared, blood roaring in my ears “I—I didn’t know. Why isn’t she telling anyone anything? I balled my fists holding the rage in “Why the fuck hasn’t anyone noticed anything?” I had to stop myself from tearing the hell out of the house and breaking everything in sight. I felt the heat in my face, the veins popping in my neck as I barely held it together. “Calm the fuck down, dude. She won’t. One, she thinks she can handle everything on her own; it’s all she’s ever done. Two, you—you screwed her over.” Trip sighed. “Look, she sort of let on that because you two spilt, she’s not inclined to share with me. I gotta say that pisses me the hell off. I love that girl. She’s just as much family as you and the girls, and you’ve fucked that up.”

  Sighing with frustration, I looked earnestly at Trip. “Something just doesn’t feel right, man. I think I made the wrong decision; it wouldn’t matter what I did, Janelle was gonna fuck this up”

  Fuck me! I knew I should’ve heard from Janelle by now. I gripped the back of my neck feeling the muscles there tight with worry and stress; she hadn’t contacted me for money. She should have by now, even though I’d cut her off. I knew she wouldn’t give up until she got what she wanted.

  Fuck this shit.

  “I’ll need your help then,” I told Trip, my decision made.

  “With?” he asked, eyebrows raised at my sudden determination.

  “I need to get my girl back, don’t I!”

  “’Bout fuckin time, dickhead,” he said, a giant smile spreading across his face. “What you got in mind?”

  It had been a few days since I had my falling out with Trip. He seemed to be keeping something from me. I supposed he was trying to hide the fact he’d told Mace about my meltdown.

  I was standing in the kitchen, the sun streaming through the windows, sipping my coffee and glaring at his favorite mug on the dish rack. I was tired and angry. How dare Mace be so gutless and just leave like that! Frankly, I didn’t give a shit if he thought he was doing the right thing or not. It was a spineless asshole move.

  He went and made me fall in love with him. He broke down all my freaking walls, which I’d erected high enough to feel safe again. And left. Just like that. Walked right out my front door.

  The sleepless nights were getting to me. My mood swings were making me hell to be around, and I was sick to death of crying and being emotional.

  Well fuck him! If he didn’t want me, that was just fine and mother fucking dandy!

  I stomped over to the dish rack, picked up his mug and threw it hard at the wall. The sound of the porcelain breaking was shrill, making my ears throb. Staring down at the broken fragments somehow made me emotional again. Those shards almost representing my broken relationship with the selfish man I loved. My eyes blurred as I leaned my hip on the counter with a shaky sigh.

  I didn’t need him or his stupid shit.

  Dumping my own coffee into the sink, I made for the carport turning up Pantera on the stereo as I went. Pulling on my boxing gloves, I took my frustration and anger out on the floor to ceiling boxing bag, picturing Mace’s face as I went. I pounded the bag harder with gritted teeth.

  Take that, fuck face!

  After an hour of punching the hell out of my bag, even with raw knuckles, I found no relief from the messed up thoughts in my head. I showered and dressed for the day, but before I did anything else, I needed to remove him from my daily life. I was a big fat bag of mixed emotions, and I’d had enough of being such a pussy. I don’t cry. I never did this squishy emotion bullshit. Stomping through my house with a box in my hand, I threw everything Mace had left behind into it. I sure as shit didn’t need his crap lying all over the place making it harder for me. Sealing up the box, I took it to the spare bedroom and shoved it in the far corner of the closet.

  Mulling over my situation, I busied myself downstairs tidying up, playing music and generally occupying myself. Everyday had been a struggle, working with Trip and not asking how Mace was; if he was suffering like I was, it was doing my head in. Living across the road from him and not storming over there to kick his ass for hurting me was killing me to the point I had been staying at Teeny’s place some nights. That was changing. I wasn’t going to be that girl, the girl who cried and sulked over an asshole.

  Unfortunately, the surveillance cameras hadn’t gotten a good shot of whoever screwed with my car, which still wasn’t fixed. The damage wasn’t as bad as we first thought, but it was expensive. Thank God, I had good insurance. That wasn’t the last of the vandalism though, a bunch of strange things had been happening. They were increasingly getting worse and I was beginning to get a little worried.

  “Scar, where are you?”

  “Kitchen!” I called out. Teeny had come round to stay the night with me. Along with the weird shit that had been happening, I had an increasing feeling like I was being watched. It was creeping me the hell out. I hadn’t told anyone about the notes. I just thought it was Janelle stirring shit, but after the one I got just before Teeny showed up, I decided it wasn’t just somebody screwing round; it was serious now.

  “What’s going on, hun?” she asked, plopping down on the bar stool at the kitchen counter and dumping her overnight bag on the floor.

  I pushed the tray of nachos back into the oven and turned around. “I’ve been getting a heap of these weird letters. They’re address to me. I get home from work and there’s usually one under the door. Anyway, I wasn’t worried about them until this one today. Now, I’m completely creeped out.” I slid the letter over to her and watched as she read it. The color drained from her face as she put it back down.

  “First of all, why the fuck haven’t you told me about this
sooner?” Teeny sat perfectly still; she may have raised her voice, but I knew full well the storm was about to hit.

  “Well, you’ve got your own stuff going on and it wasn’t a big deal. I mean, I know who’s doing it and I can take care of myself.” I turned, avoiding the evil stink eye she was giving me. Teeny had a special talent when it came to the stink eye.

  “Since when do you keep secrets from me? When did it become okay to not tell your best fucking friend what’s going on?” she screamed, slamming her hand down on the countertop.

  “For fucks sake, calm the hell down!” I snapped.

  She was being a big fucking hypocrite right now and I was gonna call her on it. I leaned across the kitchen counter, my face right in hers. In a deathly-calm quiet voice, I told her, “You don’t get to yell at me for keeping this from you. You, Teeny Louise, have been keeping a secret from me for weeks now. Care to share, or are you just going to continue spouting shit?”

  Teeny’s face visibly paled and she stammered, “I-I-it’s just, I can’t. You can’t—I—”

  “You know, I’ll find out sooner or later, and you just ripped me a new asshole for lying to you!”

  A pained expression crossed her face before she blurted, “I’m pregnant. I’m pregnant, alright! That’s my big secret.”

  I went completely silent. Unsure if I’d even heard her right. Teeny was pregnant. No, that couldn’t be right. “You’re pregnant,” I muttered a little hurt that she hadn’t told me before now. “You’re pregnant and you didn’t tell me.” This time a little louder.

  “I—well, I just didn’t know how—what to do with it. I can’t have a kid. At first, I wasn’t even sure, but then—and well, you’ve been busy with Mace, and then you two broke up and…Yeah, I am.” She babbled, looking nervous and scared all at once, definitely not happy about it.

  “You’re not excited? Does—wait, you haven’t been dating anyone.” Now I was just plain confused again. Teeny was far from being a slut. “Who?”