Dragon Lord
Page 31
She was exhausted by the time they returned to Draken Fortress, but happily so. She didn’t regret it even though her feet hurt from the soft soled slippers she’d been given to wear and her back hurt, and her belly felt as if it needed something more substantial to support its weight than her body, because she barely saw him for days on end afterward. Almost the only time they were together was at night, and she was usually exhausted and Simon seemed both exhausted and aggravated.
Audric entertained her. She didn’t doubt that Simon was behind it. If he hadn’t wanted Audric around her, he would’ve placed an army of guards between them, so she didn’t know if Audric actually wanted to be with her or not, but she enjoyed his company anyway. He took her for walks, which got shorter and shorter as time went on because it became an exercise in teeth gritted endurance for her to walk at all after many more weeks and she began to fear she was going to have to spend the last weeks of her pregnancy confined to bed. She was determined not to if she could help it. She had reached a point where she was just as miserable, physically, no matter whether she sat, or stood, walked, or reclined. At least as long as she could move around she wouldn’t be bored to death, or worse, have nothing to occupy her mind but her fears.
Those alternated between the baby’s health, having the baby, and the fear that Simon would dump her, whatever Audric had said, because he seemed to lose interest in having sex with her.
She quit worrying about any of it after a while, though. She’d grown too miserable to have any room left for anything except hoping the baby would come so she could get it over with. She ‘ripened’ well past her anxiety about not being able to get around, when even getting a decent breath of air was a struggle.
Audric stopped walking her to the garden and started carrying her out to get a breath of fresh air. As much as she appreciated his thoughtfulness, though, it was pure torture to sit for very long on the hard, backless bench. She couldn’t sit up straight because of the mound in her lap, and she couldn’t lean back far without her muscles screaming in agony.
As she sat staring at nothing in particular, thinking about nothing beyond the fact that she had to pee again when she’d just gone before she came out, idly rubbing her stomach, Audric finally turned to straddle the bench. “Come here. I will rub it and try to make it better.”
Raina looked at him doubtfully, but she was tempted. Finally, she dismissed her concern that Simon would find out and be mad and shifted closer. Audric dragged her between his thighs and pulled her back against his chest. Raina relaxed against him after a moment, closing her eyes in enjoyment as he began rubbing her belly soothingly. Just having him to lean against made her feel tremendously better because it was a strain to sit up without anything to lean on when she couldn’t sit straight up anymore because of her belly. The pressure of his hands was heavenly. Within moments she was half asleep.
“Simon’s going to be mad at both of us,” she murmured, feeling compelled to point that out.
Audric glanced up at Simon as he appeared in the door and strode toward them with angry, purposeful strides. Their gazes locked as Simon came to a halt a few feet away, his eyes blazing with anger. “I will deal with Simon’s temper,” he said grimly. “Does that make it feel any better, dearling?”
Raina expelled a deep, contented breath. “It feels wonderful! It almost doesn’t hurt now. I used to wonder what people meant when they’d say ‘it’ll feel good when it stops hurting’. I can almost get a really deep breath. Will you feel slighted if I fall asleep?”
“No.”
“Good,” she murmured. She drowsed, but she knew the moment Simon crouched beside her even before she felt the light touch of his lips. “Don’t be mad, Simon.”
He slipped an arm behind her back and one beneath her knees. “I am not, but I think you will be more comfortable sleeping in our bed.”
She doubted it, but she was relaxed enough she felt some hope of taking a nap so she didn’t argue. If the baby would just take a nap with her she thought she could manage it, but he was rarely still for very long at the time.
* * * *
Audric sent Simon a look that was a mixture of guilt and belligerence when Simon returned a short time later. He relaxed slightly when Simon, instead of blasting him with his temper, settled on the bench where Raina had been sitting and dropped his head into his hands.
“I am nigh sick with fear for her, Simon,” he said after a prolonged silence had settled between them that had grown from tension. “There is little more to her than belly now. It is your child, and I know that you will not like for me to say this, but is there not something that could be done?”
Simon lifted a haggard face to him. “Do you think I am not worried? I feel like weeping every time I look at her and it is all I can do to pretend that I am not anxious to keep from infecting her with my fear. I want the child, but not more than Rainie! Gods help me, but I would sacrifice it if I thought it would save her. I spoke to the court healer--asked him to take it from her, even though I know she would probably never forgive me for it--but he said it was too late, that it would be more dangerous to try, now, than to wait for nature to take its course.”
Audric’s shoulders slumped. “Mayhap it only seems huge because she is so small,” he said gruffly.
“It seems huge because it is--to her. The healer thought there might be more than one--which would have made me feel a great deal better, I do not mind telling you--but he could not find but one heartbeat.”
“Mayhap he is right and there are two,” Audric said more hopefully.
Simon nodded in agreement, but he didn’t look much heartened. He said nothing more and Audric had just decided to leave him with his thoughts when he finally spoke again.
“I have suggested to the council that they should consider you to take my place.”
Audric stared at Simon’s profile in disbelief for several moments before anger settled over him. “May I speak to you as your brother?”
Simon sent him a questioning look, but smiled faintly. “I thought that you always spoke to me as my brother.”
Audric glared him, unwilling to allow Simon to tease him out of his ill temper as he generally did. “Then I will tell you straight out that I want no part of it! I love you, Simon, both as my brother and my sovereign, but this I will not do for you! I have never refused to do anything you asked. I have always tried my best, regardless of how I might feel--but not this!
“I was not born to it, and not trained to it. I could not do it if I wanted to, and I do not want to even try. I knew from the moment that I realized that I loved Raina, that she was already lost to me, that there was no hope … at all. I can live with that because I must, but I will not be pushed into a position where I must marry for the sake of the realm! I will not tie myself to a woman I do love, and could never love--very likely could not even tolerate. I have no doubt that I will be miserable, but I am not going to be made more miserable by struggling with affairs of state and listening to the whining of some princess who thinks she has married beneath her because I am only a royal bastard!
“And, like it or not, when you leave here to return to her world, I will go also. You may not think that you need me now, but I have always watched your back, and I will continue to do so! Because whatever you say now, whoever they finally decide upon will not like to think that you might decide to return just about the time he becomes comfortable. If you do not spend the rest of your days dodging assassins, I will be nothing short of amazed.”
He got to his feet then, barely remembered to bow, and stalked off.
Chapter Twenty Four
Audric was startled and not terribly pleased when he answered Simon’s summons several days later and entered his chamber to discover that Simon was sitting with his back against the headboard of his bed, Raina between his splayed thighs and propped against his chest. He stared fixedly at Simon’s hands as they moved over Raina’s bared abdomen for several moments before he collected himself enough to be
g pardon and make an about face.
“My apologies. I was told you wished to speak to me,” he said stiffly.
“I summoned you. Sit down--the end of the bed will do,” Simon responded coolly.
Audric stared at the bed for a moment and balked. “I will stand … if you please,” he growled irritably.
Simon ignored him, tipping his head to look down at Raina. “Is that better, beloved?”
Raina sighed, but decided to lie. “Yes, much.”
“There was something I needed to discuss with you … and it concerns Audric, as well.”
Raina shifted, trying to find a more comfortable position as she looked around for something to cover herself with. Seeing nothing close enough to grab, she gave up. She didn’t particularly care. If Audric was revolted, he could look at something else. “What is it?” she asked finally. “Nothing bad?”
“I hope you will not think so,” he said, and paused for a moment. “Would you be greatly distressed if we stayed here instead of returning to your world?”
Raina tipped her head back to look up at him. “I’d … still be your woman, right?”
He smiled faintly and kissed the end of her nose. “Did I not say you would always be mine?”
Raina smiled back at him in relief. “Then I don’t care--as long as I’m with you I don’t care where we live.”
“You are absolutely certain?”
Her smile widened. “Of course I’m sure.”
“Well, that is a relief, because I had told the council that I would not consider ruling without you by side and they have decided that they want us both.”
Raina chuckled wryly. “They want you badly enough to put up with the upstart Earthling, you mean.”
“They will do more than ‘put up’ with you, I assure you,” he said grimly. “They are happy to have you, else I would not have considered it.”
Raina sent Audric a wry look, but he was staring studiously at the far wall. She frowned. “I’d be … like … your consort?” she asked hesitantly.
“You will be my Empress--we are equals, you and I, remember?”
Raina wasn’t certain of how she felt about the title, but she felt delirious with joy that Simon had said he would marry her--not asked, told her, but she wasn’t about to quibble over it. “Empress Raina,” she said thoughtfully.
“It does have a nice sound to it,” Simon agreed cheerfully. “And Audric will be your consort,” he added.
Raina’s mind went blank. She stared at Simon a moment and then looked at Audric. Audric looked as if he’d been pole-axed, though, and she could tell he wasn’t going to be any help clearing up her confusion. “But … you mean he’ll be my escort?”
“Audric knows what I mean, do you not?”
Audric stared at him blankly for several moments and finally sat down on the end of the bed as if his knees had give out. “I have not betrayed you, Simon. I swear it! I never would.”
“But you love her, Audric, and she loves you--I love you. I would far rather accept that we are all dracons, and fallible, than demand something of you that you might or might not be able to do. As much as I want to be with Raina all the time, and as little as I care for the thought of sharing her, I can not do my duty without leaving her alone much of the time and I would never trust anyone to keep her safe but you.
“I need to be easy in my mind that Rainie is safe when I can not be with her, Audric, else I can not in good conscience accept the duties expected of me. Rainie’s happiness and well being will always be far more important to me than anything else.”
Audric turned to look at her for the first time, staring at her for a long, long moment before he looked at Simon again. “You do not mean this,” he said hoarsely. “You are … concerned … now and you are not thinking clearly.”
“I am thinking clearly. I have checked the laws. There is no impediment. Despite the fact that it has always, in the past, been males who have binded with multiple consorts, there is nothing to prevent such an arrangement between us. You may be sure that I am not completely delighted with the prospect, even though I feel that it was the best solution for all of us. You may also be certain that I mean always to be first with my Empress--we will be first bound. She and I first mates, and you will be her consort--that does not make you and I equals. I do not expect this to go smoothly--perhaps in the years to come--but no time soon. I believe that we will muddle through, however. I have not slain you yet.”
“Uh … Do I have a voice in this?”
“Only if you mean to agree with me, beloved.”
Raina gave him a strained smile. “I should’ve known that was your idea of us being equals,” she said teasingly. “There’ll be raised eyebrows.”
Simon shrugged. “I do not care, even a little. They can waggle them, if they like. I am the Emperor Simon Draken, and I always do as I please.”
Raina sighed. “Well, if y’all are through deciding what you want to do, do you think, maybe, you could call the healer? I’m pretty sure something’s happening here.”
All traces of humor left Simon abruptly. He stiffened. “Gods be damned! Rainie! Why did you not say something before! Audric will have a heart attack if you have that child before the healer arrives and I am not at all certain that I will not! Audric! Go! Fetch the man now. And if you faint, I swear I will tie you to the whipping post myself and take the hide off of you!”
Simon looked so relieved when the healer arrived and sent him from the room, Raina might have been amused if she’d been in any condition to feel amusement. The pains had been growing steadily worse even before Audric had arrived for the discussion, though, until they’d reached the point where she couldn’t sit still any longer.
She’d listened only with half a mind to the discussion, had a dim idea of what it was about, and a lot of reservations, but she could deal with that later, she thought, when she didn’t hurt so much. It got worse than she would’ve believed possible, so that she passed from the fear of dying to the fear that she wouldn’t, and still it didn’t let up. She hardly knew where she was or what was happening beyond the haze of pain, but she perked up when the healer stepped to the door and announced that the baby was coming and Simon should come in to witness the birth.
Almost over, she told herself. Just a little longer.
When she managed to open her eyes again, Simon and Audric were plastered against the wall at the foot of the bed, both of them looking as if they would pass out and slide down the wall at any minute. She lifted a hand hopefully to Simon. He stared at it as if it was a snake and finally wobbled to the side of the bed and dropped heavily to his knees, grasping her hand. She squeezed his hand tightly, uttering a growl of effort each time the healer told her to push.
“The babe has crowned,” the doctor announced.
Audric slid to the floor and fell over, distracting Raina in the middle of a contraction. She tried to sit up. Simon pushed her back down. “He is resting, beloved. He will be fine.”
Raina panted for breath. “He hit his head.”
“He has a very hard head. I am certain, if he broke anything at all, that it was the fixture he turned over when he fell.”
“It is a male child!” the healer announced just as the baby announced his arrival by letting out a loud, indignant wail.
Riana let out a tearful breath of relief. “Is he alright? Does he look alright?” she demanded anxiously.
Simon turned his head to look at the infant. He frowned. “He is very small,” he said finally. “And very ugly.”
Raina glared at him, but ground her teeth as another contraction hit her. “What’s wrong?” she asked, panicked when the pain eased off.
“You are doing very well, lady,” the healer said soothingly. “The second infant has crowned.”
Simon stared at the man blankly. “You said there were not two,” he said accusingly. “I have been going insane with worry that it was one enormous babe and there are two?”
“I beg pardon, sire,
but I said I did not hear but one. If you will only look, you will see that there are definitely two.”
Simon looked vaguely ill. “I will take your word for it,” he said uneasily, his hand tightening on Raina’s, more as if he needed to hold on to her than as if he was giving reassurance.
“If you will take this one, I will help the other.”
Simon looked at the man in horror, but finally reached to take the wiggling bundle. Raina held up her arms for the baby as he turned and he settled it beside her with a look of profound relief. She cuddled it as she strained with another contraction and finally went limp as a thin wail announced the arrival of the second baby. “It is a female.”
As excited as she was about the babies, and anxious to examine them, exhaustion threatened to swallow her up. She struggled against it until she’d carefully looked both of her babies over and satisfied herself that they were perfectly formed. One of the women that had arrived with the healer surged forward and reached for a baby. Raina tightened her arms around the baby protectively, glaring at her.
“It is alright, Rainie,” Simon said soothingly. “She only wants to bathe them. She will bring them back to you.”
She still didn’t like it, but she was too exhausted to argue. She lay drifting in and out of sleep for a while, listening to what was going on around her, feeling awe and happiness slowly claim her. “Devlyn and Racquel,” she murmured.
When she opened her eyes, she discovered Simon had disappeared and Audric was kneeling by the bed, holding her hand and grinning at her sheepishly. “They are beautiful,” he murmured. “Just like their mother.”
Raina blinked at him dizzily. “They are?”
“Yes.”
She frowned. “Racquel has dark hair … like Simon.”
“I have not seen them,” he confessed shakily. “But I know they are beautiful.”