His face looked so hopeful and yet so sad at the same time. I could see the apprehension in his eyes, and I had a feeling my face mirrored his, as I was feeling the same mix of emotions with him now sitting next to me telling me these things.
“Allow me to spell it out for you,” I said calmly. “I am still absolutely terrified of marriage, but I would marry you tonight if it was a way for me to prove how much I believe that you’re the guy for me.”
His eyebrows rose at my declaration. “Wow,” he said, not giving me much of anything to go off of.
“So?” I asked, searching his face for some sign of what his ‘wow’ meant.
He looked stern again. “I cannot get hurt again,” he said, gravely. “I’m serious.” He sounded serious, but I could hear him wavering at the same time.
“I know,” I said. “Me neither.”
He shrugged. “So the way I see it is the only way I can really guarantee that is if we do get married – tonight.” With that he pulled out his phone and started pushing buttons on the screen as my eyes went wide. Was he serious? Did he actually want to get married?!
“What are you doing?” I asked, trying to keep the panic out of my voice.
“Booking flights to Vegas,” he said, completely calm. “You’d better say yes this time.”
I felt the color drain out of my face. He started singing a song about it being a beautiful night and wanting to marry me as he scrolled through his phone.
“You have a girlfriend,” I said, wondering why I’d chosen that moment to bring up Kelsey.
Beckett just shook his head, his fingers still typing. “No, I broke up with her about thirty minutes ago, so I’m single,” he said, glancing up at me to gauge my reaction.
I put my hand over my mouth, suddenly afraid I was going to be sick.
It was then that Beckett burst out laughing and turned his phone to me. “Email,” he said, showing me his BC email account on the screen. “But that was fun.”
I reached out and smacked him on his chest. “That was mean,” I said, and before I knew what was happening, he grabbed me and pulled me to him.
He kissed me slowly, laying me down on the sand. When he pulled back, he looked down at me, his eyes searching mine. He looked down at my left hand, taking it in his, his thumb tracing the ring on my finger that he’d given me so many years earlier.
“That’s my ring isn’t it,” he said softly.
I nodded. “Yeah, it is.”
He sighed. “I know we’ve been through a lot of shit, but I think it’s time we put all that behind us. What do you think?”
“That’s definitely a question I can say yes to,” I said, before I kissed him again.
Epilogue
I was rushing around like a crazy person, barking orders at whoever would listen. My nerves were about shot, as I moved from bridesmaid to bridesmaid convincing them to put down the champagne and help Summer get ready. We needed to be outside in ten minutes and she was still shoeless.
She seemed blissfully unaware of this fact, as she couldn’t have been happier that she was about to walk down the aisle toward Patrick. I was trying to convince her cousin Elizabeth to help me finish getting Summer ready, but she was too busy staring at the engagement ring on her own left hand. Her boyfriend had proposed two nights before, so she was still in the honeymoon stage of her engagement. She was a lost cause. Then, just as I was realizing that no one was focused on the task at hand, Kate swooped in and took one of the shoes I was holding in my left hand. She was tan from the trip to Antigua she’d just taken with Tim who had been in the picture for officially a year that day.
Kate shook her head at me, as she slipped the shoe on Summer’s foot. “Are you ever going to exchange that ring for a real engagement ring?” she asked, looking up at me.
I was still wearing Beckett’s silver ring on my left hand. I hadn’t taken it off since the day I’d put it back on. “Nope,” I said. “But, for the record, we are not engaged, so for now it is just a ring.”
Beckett and I had talked about marriage, but I knew it was still a long way off. We’d officially been together for nine months and had been living together for one whole month. When Summer and my lease had ended, she’d moved in with Patrick, and I had moved in with Beckett. So far it had been perfect, but not much different from before, as I had practically lived at his apartment anyway. I figured we would get married eventually, but there was no rush. We were happy just the way we were.
Beckett was busy with school, and I was extra busy trying to balance working part-time for Kate, writing my blog, and making edits to the novel I’d finished in January. In March it had been picked up by an agent who had sold it to a publisher in May. I’d been making the necessary revisions for the past few months. The book was due out in January. I’d finally reached my goal of being a published author.
When the book had been picked up and things started to get busy for me, I’d realized how insane it was getting trying to balance everything. I’d started earning a good living from my blog, so I asked Kate if she would be okay with me working for her part-time. I’d stayed on full-time until she could hire someone else but then dropped back my hours so I could focus on writing and revising. I was also in the process of working on a second novel.
I turned to look at Summer. She was standing in front of the full-length mirror at her parents’ beach house where we were all staying. In a few minutes, we would walk downstairs and out onto the beach where she would marry Patrick. In her simple, white dress she looked like a princess. She’d put a white hibiscus in her hair, and she looked stunning. I stood next to her in my cornflower blue bridesmaid dress and smiled.
“You look so beautiful,” I said, putting my arm around her.
“Thanks,” she said. “You do too.”
“Are you nervous?”
She shook her head. “Nope. I’m marrying Patrick. I couldn’t be less nervous.”
Standing there with her made me think of Ryan. I didn’t think about him much anymore, and I hadn’t seen him but once since that day at my mom’s house in August. It had been awkward and uncomfortable, as if I was talking to a stranger. The last time had been during Christmas. I’d been shopping on Newbury Street and had literally run into him outside of Banana Republic. He was with his new girlfriend, Trish, and I realized halfway through the conversation that she was the girl his mom had wanted to set him up with when we’d first started dating. We’d talked for a few minutes but kept the conversation at a surface level. He didn’t ask about my personal life, but I think he knew I was with Beckett.
He did tell me that he was moving out to San Francisco permanently after the first of the year, so I doubted I’d see him again. It was good. He was better in the past, but every now and then, he would pop into my head, and he would suddenly be in the present. I had no regrets and no wishes to see him again. He was just a memory of a different time in my life.
Standing next to Summer wearing all white, I imagined what it would have been like if I had decided to stay with Ryan, if he hadn’t found out about my affair with Beckett, or if I’d chosen him. Would I feel the same way as Summer if I was preparing to walk down the aisle toward Ryan? I couldn’t picture it no matter how hard I tried, so I knew I never would have been as calm as her. I would have been a wreck, because deep down I would have known I was choosing the wrong man.
Just then, there was a knock at the door. I walked over to get it. As soon as I opened the door, my heart skipped a beat. Beckett stood there smiling at me. Even now, after all of this time, I still got excited when I saw him.
“Wow,” he said. “You look incredible.” He leaned down to kiss me.
“Thanks, so do you.”
He did. The guys were all wearing tan suits with cornflower blue ties. His brown hair was still on the long side, and his brown eyes danced back and forth as he looked at me and smiled.
“You girls about ready? I was told to come up here and tell you it’s time to head down.”
/>
“We’re ready, right Sum?” I asked, turning back to her. She gave me a thumbs-up sign. “Yeah, we’re ready.”
“Okay, then I’m heading down, so I can stabilize Pat. He’s about to fall over from nerves.”
I laughed. That was typical. Summer was calm, and Patrick was freaking out.
“So I guess I’ll see you down there,” he said.
“You will.” I smiled, kissed him once on the cheek and hurried back to Summer.
***
The ceremony went off without a hitch. Summer and Patrick were now Mr. and Mrs. Ryland, and they couldn’t have been happier. Beckett and I had done a joint toast, pulling together pieces of what we loved about Summer and Patrick as a couple with the pieces we loved about them as individuals. They had loved it. Then we danced, ate, and celebrated with our friends.
Near the end of the wedding, Beckett and I were sitting outside at one of the tables, drinking margaritas and enjoying the break in the noise from the party. The light from the nearly full moon overhead was dancing off the water. It was a perfect evening in so many ways. I smiled over at Beckett. He smiled back, and then got to his feet.
He held out his hand to me. “Let’s take a walk.”
“Okay,” I said, setting my glass down on the table.
He took my hand, and we set off down the beach. In the distance, we could see the guests inside, dancing and laughing. Beckett put his arm around me as we walked.
“They are so happy,” I said, referring to Patrick and Summer.
“Not as happy as us,” he countered, squeezing me against his side.
He was right. I didn’t think anyone was as happy as we were.
“Court?”
“Yeah?”
Beckett stopped then and turned to face me. “I want to ask you something, but I’m a little hesitant.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. What could he possibly be hesitant about asking me? He took my hands in his. I realized then that he was nervous.
“The thing is,” he continued, “I’ve asked you this question before, and you gave me an answer that I didn’t like, so I’m a little afraid to ask again.”
My heart started to pound. He was going to ask me to marry him. Oh, my God. This was it. I finally had my second chance. It had been three and a half years since the last time, and he knew that I would never say no, but still he was nervous.
“Yes!” I said quickly, before he could even get his question out.
He gave me a funny look. “I didn’t even ask the question yet.”
“Okay, go ahead. Ask me,” I said, bouncing up and down lightly on balls of my feet. I had waited so long to hear him say these words again, preparing myself for what I would say.
“I just wanted to know if you wanted to look at getting a bigger apartment, because I really think we should.”
My face fell. I had really thought this was it. Was he really just bringing up the apartment debate again? We had talked about it at length. He thought we should get a bigger place, but I liked his apartment so much, that I’d convinced him to keep it. It was plenty big for the two of us. Besides, now that John had moved out of the apartment next door, there was less risk of being scorned as we came and went.
He smiled, then and put his arms around me. “I’m only kidding,” he said. “Will you marry me?”
I was in shock for a full ten seconds before I realized what was happening. I threw my arms around him and kissed him as hard as I could.
“Is that a yes?” he asked, when I pulled away.
“Yes! Yes, yes, yes!” I shrieked.
His face broke into a wide smile. “Thank God,” he said then.
“Beck, are you kidding me?” I asked him. “Why would I ever say no again? There is nothing in this world that I want more than you. Oh my God, do I want to marry you!”
“Well, in that case.” He reached into his inside coat pocket and produced a little blue box.
I gulped. He opened it to reveal an incredible princess cut diamond ring. I held out my left hand expectantly. He slid the silver ring off and put it on my right hand, then pulled the engagement ring from the box.
He laughed nervously as he slid the ring on my finger and kissed me once. “I’ve held onto this ring for a long time.”
I looked up at him, wide-eyed, not believing he’d kept the ring he’d first proposed with for so long. It made wearing it all the more special.
“I love you, Courtney,” he said. “It’s a simple as that, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
I looked at the ring on my finger. I had never felt like something fit me and my hand better. I was so happy, I was bursting.
“It’s us,” I said, as I put my arms around him. “Me and you. It’s what I wished for so long ago. I wished for us.”
He nodded. “It is. It’s us. It’s what I wished for, too.”
It was always us. Even before we were together, it was always Beckett and Courtney. When we were apart, neither of us felt right without the other. When we were together again, it was as if everything was back it its right place. There was no other way to describe it.
Beckett was my best friend in the world and he had been since the day I’d met him. For whatever reason, we were always inexplicable drawn to each other. Everything was right with the world when he was by my side. Three and a half years ago the world had spun off its axis and we were knocked off with it. Then a year ago it had found its way back onto its axis and was now happily turning the way it was supposed to. Everything was as it always should have been. I was in the arms of my best friend, the man I loved, and the man I would spend the rest of my life with. It just didn’t get any better than that.
Overhead, fireworks started booming, lighting up the beach. Beckett turned to me and smiled. His face lit up with color from the light from above.
“You’re not scared, are you?” he asked, grinning at me. “Should I be concerned that you’re going to make a run for it now that I’ve brought up marriage?”
I put my hands on either side of his face, pulling it toward me, so I could kiss him.
“No,” I said. “I’m not scared.”
He kissed me back, as the fireworks boomed overhead.
About the Author
Thanks so much for reading Just Watch the Fireworks. It was my first novel, and I had a blast writing it. Books have always played a big part in my life, and I love that I was able to translate the ideas and characters in my head into a story of my own. I currently live in Orlando, FL, but spent two years in Boston after graduating from the University of Florida (Go Gators!). Living in Boston, I absolutely fell in love with the city (and the Red Sox) which is why I chose it as my stage for Beckett and Courtney’s story.
In addition to books, I am addicted to fashion, and I never go anywhere without my iPod. Give me a grande non-fat vanilla latte from Starbucks and chips and queso from Tijuana Flats, and I am a happy girl. I am a total sucker for romantic comedies in all forms, because at the end of the day I just want to laugh and see some really great people fall in love. When those stories are mixed with an awesome soundtrack, it just doesn’t get much better than that.
You can read more about me online at: http://www.goodreads.com/monicaalexander
Also by Monica Alexander
Aftershocks
Broken Fairytales
Playlist
Whenever I write, I listen to music, so songs have a way of working themselves into my stories. I incorporated a lot of music into Just Watch the Fireworks, so I thought it was only right to include the songs I hear when I read the book. Some I referenced in the book itself and others are just ones that resonated with me when I thought about what was happening to the characters and what they were dealing with at a particular moment. Enjoy!
Question – Old 97’s
Shell Games – Bright Eyes
Sweetness – Jimmy Eat World
Oh Well, Oh Well – Mayday Parade
Why Can’t We Be Friends
– Smash Mouth
Come As You Are – Nirvana
Somewhere I Belong – Linkin Park
Song in My Head – Sherwood
Peaches – The Presidents of the United States
Burn it to the Ground – Nickelback
Time-Bomb – All Time Low
State of Love and Trust – Pearl Jam
Celebrity Skin – Hole
Seether – Veruca Salt
When I Come Around – Green Day
Friends in Low Places – Garth Brooks
Days of the Old – Every Avenue
Good – Better Than Ezra
Till the World Ends – Britney Spears
All Around Me – Flyleaf
Like We Used To – A Rocket to the Moon
Holding a Heart – Girl Named Toby
Your Life and Mine – Just Surrender
Lie to Me – 12 Stones
Let Love In – The Goo Goo Dolls
Good Intentions – Toad the Wet Sprocket
Perfect Blue Buildings – Counting Crows
Murder of One – Counting Crows
No One’s Gonna Love You – Band of Horses
Shouldn’t Be a Good in Goodbye – Jason Walker
Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been – Relient K
Drop in the Ocean – Ron Pope
Found Out About You – Gin Blossoms
Just Watch the Fireworks Page 32