by Barbara Gee
“Hey, Beck. Sorry, we were up in the attic.”
I was impressed that she managed to look and sound so calm. Beckett really was incredibly handsome. If I was Janna and already had a thing for the guy, seeing him standing there in jeans, black leather jacket, and chunky biker-style boots would’ve taken my breath completely away—just like seeing JP did to me.
“Hey, Janna. Thanks for letting me crash your party.”
“Hi, Beckett,” I called to give Janna a chance to regroup if she needed it. I even gave him a jaunty wave.
“Good to see you again,” Ava added. “Myla and I were just headed out to the backyard to see if it can be made into a nice courtyard or something. We’ll let Janna show you around in here.”
He flashed us a smile. “Good to see you ladies too. This looks like quite a house.”
“Yeah, it’s great,” Janna said, a hint of nervousness coming through. “We can do a quick tour if you want. You girls sure you don’t want to come along?”
Ava waved a hand. “We just saw the whole thing. You go ahead.”
We headed down the hall and I jabbed her with my elbow. “Not exactly subtle, are you?”
“What? It would be silly for us to go through the whole thing again.”
“Maybe Janna wanted the support. She sounded a little desperate, don’t you think?”
“It was just a brief moment of panic. They need the alone time.”
She was probably right, but I was worried. What if Beckett really was here to tell Janna he was leaving?
***
“He leaves tonight.” Janna was sitting on the floor by the front door, tears streaming down her face.
Ava and I had gone inside as soon as we heard Beckett drive away and now we rushed over to her. He’d only been there for twenty minutes, but that was apparently all the time he needed to devastate Janna.
We knelt on either side of her, neither of us knowing what to say.
Janna wiped at her cheeks. “Don’t worry, I held it together while he was here. I didn’t break down until I shut the door behind him.”
“What happened?” Ava asked softly. “What’d he say?”
“He likes the house,” she said thickly. “He wishes he was going to be around to help renovate it.” She drew her legs up and dropped her forehead to her knees, a single sob escaping.
“Oh Janna,” I said, my heart breaking for her. “So he really is leaving?”
She nodded, keeping her face hidden. “He said he’s being loaned out to another field office for a while. I asked how long, and he said it depends. I said, ‘On what, how long the undercover operation goes?’”
“Oh my word, what did he say?” Ava asked, sounding a little in awe of Janna’s boldness.
“He didn’t deny it, just gave me a surprised look. I told him I’d figured it out from hearing people say bits and pieces about his job and assignments and the fact that he knew so much about trafficking.”
“Did he confirm it?” I wondered.
“No, he just said he can’t talk about it.”
“He didn’t give you any idea of how long?”
Janna shook her head. “Nope.”
Ava patted her shoulder. “Did he say why he sought you out to tell you personally this time?”
“He said he’s enjoyed working with me at the house and he wanted to encourage me to take the job here because he thinks I’d be really good at it.”
“Well, that was…nice,” Ava said hesitantly. She’d clearly been hoping for more, as had I.
Janna lifted her teary face. “He kissed me.”
“What?” Ava and I asked at the same time and at exactly the same high pitch.
Janna sniffed. “He started to leave, but then he turned around and came back. He held my head and said if things were different he would’ve wanted to spend time with me. Get to know me outside of work. And then he kissed me.”
“Is that…good?” I asked, squinting at her hopefully. “It is good, right? It means he has feelings for you just like you do for him.”
Her eyes welled up again. “It was a good-bye kiss. That’s how it felt. Like it was our first and our last. Like he’s afraid we won’t see each other again.”
“Did he say anything to indicate that?” Ava wondered.
“He didn’t have to, I could just tell. He’s afraid he won’t come back and he didn’t want to go away with me thinking he didn’t care. But it was good-bye. Wherever he’s going—whatever he’s going to do—it’s so dangerous he doesn’t think he’s coming back.”
“You got all that from one kiss?” I asked gently. “You don’t think you’re overreacting?”
“I’m not. I saw it in his eyes and felt it in his kiss. He only revealed how he feels because of it.”
Ava pressed a hand to her chest. “But he wanted you to know, and he wanted that kiss to take with him.”
Janna covered her face with her hands. “It’s not romantic, Ava, it’s selfish. It would be a lot easier to watch him leave if I thought he was indifferent. Now all I’ll think about is what could have been.”
“What can still be,” Ava said sternly. “He’ll be back.”
“Maybe, but I doubt it.” She looked at me with a crooked smile. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore. Let’s go to your house so you can show me my room.”
I leaned over to hug her. “You got it. How soon will you be moving in?”
Chapter 39
O
ver the next month, JP and I worked to establish our new normal. Which, as of two weeks ago, included Janna as my roommate.
She was fantastic. Not that I saw her a lot, considering I was at JP’s almost every evening, but she cleaned up after herself and had also added some cool new furniture to the place, which I appreciated. I wasn’t quite as fond of the grandma décor as Ava had been.
On the days I didn’t teach I stayed with Lily, and Camilla covered the other days. My mom had even filled in a couple of times when I got called into work on short notice.
JP tried to take off work a little early at least two days a week. He felt guilty that everyone else was taking care of his child, even though he knew we all enjoyed it. He talked about finding a good daycare for at least a couple of days a week, but Camilla and I encouraged him to wait until after Adalyn passed. Lily had had enough adjustments for now.
That was the toughest part of this normal we’d found—watching the health of a wonderful lady whom we’d grown to love steadily decline. JP, Lily, and I drove to Garnett every Saturday to spend time with her. It was the right thing to do, but it was getting harder on Lily every time we went. She couldn’t understand why her Grammy was so tired and sick. She asked a lot of questions and got frustrated with our answers. She complained about the long drives. But when she was with Adalyn, she was sweet and gentle, just as JP asked her to be.
Our visits lasted two to four hours, depending on how Adalyn was feeling. Most of the time was spent with her simply watching Lily play or reading to her. Reading was the one activity Adalyn could still handle, and Lily would curl up in her lap for an hour at a time and listen to story after story.
Louise spent most days with her friend, with private-duty nurses covering every night and also the days Louise couldn’t be there.
It was a Friday night, five weeks after Haley’s death, when Louise called to tell us Adalyn was in the hospital. She had passed out shortly after eating a few bites of soup for dinner. Louise had called 911 and Adalyn had been admitted for tests.
She was conscious, but barely. Louise quietly informed us that the doctor wasn’t optimistic. He didn’t expect Adalyn to last more than a few days.
JP was ready to head to the hospital right then, but Louise convinced him to wait until morning. She hoped Adalyn would be more alert by then. She also asked us to bring Lily, because it could be the last time Adalyn would be aware of her.
***
The visit didn’t happen. Adalyn lost consciousness soon after Louise’s phone
call and she passed at midnight.
Her memorial service was held the following weekend, attended by all of JP’s family, my parents, and Adalyn’s group of friends. Her ashes would be buried beside Haley’s.
Lily didn’t totally understand, of course. We talked to her about Adalyn being in heaven now, living with the God Lily heard about in Sunday school. Lily asked if she liked living there better than here, and JP tried to explain that she hadn’t gone because she wanted to, but because it was her time. When people got too sick to live here, God gave them a place where they wouldn’t be sick anymore. We didn’t know if it was the best explanation, but it seemed to satisfy her.
Thankfully Adalyn had had time to take care of all the legalities of getting her estate transferred into a trust for Lily, but JP was the one who had to take care of getting the house ready to sell. His family and I spent two weekends cleaning it out.
Adalyn had owned a lot of valuable jewelry, as well as furniture and art. We kept most of her jewelry and some special collectibles for Lily and sold the rest at a local auction house, the proceeds going into the trust. Everything else was donated or junked. After that JP had a cleaning service professionally clean the house from top to bottom, then it went on the market.
Because it was well maintained and located in a desirable neighborhood, he had three full-price offers within a week. He chose the family that had a three-year-old daughter.
And then—a month after Adalyn died—everything was done. All the things that had consumed so much of our time and energy the past few months were just—gone.
It felt surreal. Adalyn’s valiant fight was finished, and the final result was that her decision to trust JP had given a little girl her father, and that father his girl. It hadn’t been an easy road, but Lily made everything we’d been through more than worth it.
We would be forever grateful to Adalyn.
The next Friday, a week after JP had signed the papers to sell Adalyn’s house, effectively ending all his responsibilities in the town of Garnett, I found his truck parked in front of my own house when I got home from work. Janna’s car was also there, even though it was at least an hour earlier than she usually got home.
I hurried inside, hoping this meant he and Lily were planning to spend the evening here, which would save me the drive to and from Mountain View. It had been a long day at school, and not having to spend an hour on the road would be wonderful.
I found JP and Myla seated in the living room, Lily playing with a doll on the floor between them.
“Hey, guys,” I said, immediately going to JP. He stood and held out his arms, wrapping me up and kissing me soundly.
“Hi, My-My,” Lily crooned. And then, “Why are you guys kissin’ again?”
“Crazy, isn’t it, Lily?” Janna teased.
“What are you two doing here?” I asked a little breathlessly when the kiss ended.
“We comed to surprise you!” Lily announced.
I knelt down for a hug. “Well, it’s a super great surprise,” I told her. I looked at Janna. “You’re home early too. Surprises all around. Did you know they were coming?”
She grinned and nodded. “I did, and I would’ve been here even earlier but as I was packing up my stuff a gang of old ladies marched into the house and announced they wanted to volunteer. They go to the Methodist church. One of them said she’s your aunt.”
I burst out laughing. “You’re kidding! That would be my Great Aunt Donna. Pastor Dan announced that Find Your Rest is going to be our new neighbor last Sunday at church. I guess the ladies need a new cause to support.”
“They’re loud but harmless,” JP assured her. “Unless you don’t like getting advice from octogenarians, because trust me, they have lots and lots of it to share.”
“I can put up with the advice, considering they’re willing to cook and clean. I signed them all up. They’ll be a great asset to the place, just maybe not all at once.”
“Definitely stagger their schedules,” I said, “but they’re great ladies and they’ll love on your residents once you get up and going. My suggestion would be to put them in charge of desserts. Nothing says love like a grandma and her desserts.”
“Great idea. That could be a really special thing. I’m going to add it to my idea list.”
I got up from the floor and slung an arm around JP’s lean waist. “So what’s the plan? You guys want to hang out here for dinner?”
Lily jumped up, did a happy twirl, and landed in Janna’s lap. “I’m stayin’ with Aunt Janna!”
“You are?” I raised my brows and looked at JP. “Does that mean what I think it means?” I wanted to add oh please oh please oh please but I refrained.
“Depends. What do you think it means?” he asked with a slow smile.
“Date night?” I tried not to sound too pitifully hopeful, but I wasn’t very successful.
His smile turned rueful. “Oh. No, sorry.”
“Oh.” Now I had to try not to look too pitifully disappointed.
He chuckled and ruffled my hair. “It’s not date night, Myla, it’s date weekend. Go pack your bag so we can get on the road.”
It took a moment for his words to sink in, and then my jaw dropped. Weekend? I was going to get a whole weekend with him?
I was pretty sure my smile qualified as blinding. “We’re going away?” I asked when I found my voice.
“Yeah. Just you and me and an isolated cabin in the mountains.”
I hugged him hard, my heart bursting with love and excitement. “That sounds so perfect. Best surprise ever.”
He laughed again. “Go pack. The sooner we get going, the sooner we get there.”
I gave him another squeeze then ran upstairs, Lily close on my heels.
“Aunt Janna and me are goin’ to the movies,” she announced, following me down the hall and bopping into my room.
“Well, that sounds like a good time.”
“There’s a movie ‘bout a princess. And if I eat my dinner, I get popcorn.”
I pulled jeans, underwear, and socks from my drawers. “Then I’d say you’d better eat that dinner. You have to have popcorn at the movies.”
“I knooooooooow,” she said, rolling around on my bed. “I’m gonna eat it all. And I’m gonna sleep right here in your bed for two nights.”
I put my suitcase on the end of the bed and tickled her. “You’re welcome to sleep in my bed anytime,” I said as she giggled.
“Are you and Daddy gonna go to the movies?”
“I don’t think so, but I’m sure we’ll have fun.”
“Not as much fun as goin’ to the movies with Aunt Janna.”
I added warm shirts and sleep attire to the suitcase. “You’re probably right about that. Movie night with Janna is hard to beat.”
Lily sat up and watched me pack. “Are you gonna take a pretty dress?”
“No, I think just jeans. We aren’t going to go anywhere fancy.”
I went into the bathroom and she soon joined me. “You’re takin’ a hair dryer?”
“Sure am. My hair takes a looooooong time to dry without it.”
“Daddy says you have purty hair. He says you’re bootiful.”
“He does?” I asked, feeling ridiculously moved to know he’d told her that.
“Yup. He said you’re bootiful and have bootiful hair and a bootiful heart inside here.” She pointed to her chest. “But we can’t see it. But he knows it’s bootiful cuz you’re so nice. And Grammy had a bootiful heart too. Cuz she was nice.”
“You are so right about that. You know lots of people with beautiful hearts, don’t you?”
She nodded. “Aunt Janna has a bootiful heart cuz she’s gonna get me popcorn.”
“And you know what? You have a beautiful heart too, cuz you’re the nicest little girl I know.” I tapped her on the nose and smiled. “You take good care of Aunt Janna and my bed while we’re gone, okay?”
“I will!”
I gathered up some toiletries from
the box of travel-sized bottles I kept handy. “Can you put these in my suitcase?” I asked, handing her a few things.
She grabbed them and ran into the bedroom while I got my toothbrush and some makeup items. What else? I’d never packed for a weekend so quickly and I was bound to be forgetting something, but I figured there was nothing I couldn’t live without for a couple of days.
I put the final things in the suitcase and zipped it up. “Okay Lily, run downstairs and tell Daddy I’ll be there in a second. I just have to change my clothes.”
“Okaaaaaaaaaay,” she sing-songed, running down the hall.
I heard her loudly announcing my imminent appearance as she went down the stairs and I couldn’t help but grin. I was going to miss the little gal this weekend, but I was so grateful for the time with JP. So grateful I felt almost giddy a few minutes later as he put my suitcase in the back seat of the truck, beside his own duffel bag, a cooler, and a box of groceries. This was really happening!
I grabbed him before he could circle around to his side and hugged him. “Thank you for this.”
He gave me a quick, hard kiss. “I’m not just doing it for you, babe. I’m looking forward to it just as much.”
That made me even happier. I reluctantly let go of him so we could get going. We waved to Janna and Lily, who were on the porch, and then we were off.
“How far?” I asked.
He pulled out his phone and opened the map app. “An hour and twenty minutes. Ava found us this place, so if you don’t like it, blame her.”
“She knew? I just talked to her last evening. She did a good job of not letting anything slip.”
“I told her if she ruined the surprise I’d never trust her with another secret.”
I laughed. “That was the best threat you could have made. The girl loves being in the know.”
“The map shows a little restaurant about fifteen minutes from the cabin. I thought we could stop to eat there, if you can wait that long.”
“I definitely can. I’m too excited to be hungry.”
He reached for my hand and laced his fingers through mine. “This has been a long time coming and I’m afraid it’s going to go by way too fast.”