by Amy Brent
“Because you studied to be a child therapist, silly,” Brittany said, wiping away a couple of my tears. “You’ve always been great with children.”
“What if my kids are terrible and I can’t control them?” I asked. “And what if Ian doesn’t want anything to do with this baby and I have to raise it on my own? I don’t know if I can handle being a single parent.”
“You won’t have to,” Brittany said confidently. “I’ll be here to help. Auntie Britt is going to spoil that kid rotten.”
I gave her a watery smile. “That makes me feel so much better,” I joked.
“Seriously, anything you need,” Brittany said. “Babysitting, grocery runs, diaper changes, rocking the thing back to sleep in the middle of the night—you name it. I’m on it.”
I gave a small laugh. “The thing?”
“You know, the baby.” Brittany scrunched up her nose. “I guess it’s a good thing you’re pregnant before I am. You’re going to have to teach me how it’s all done.”
I sighed. “I’ve already read a gazillion articles and blogs, and I still feel like I don’t know anything about raising a kid,” I confessed.
“Well, you’ve got another, what, eight months to figure it out?”
“Unless the baby is premature,” I fretted. “Or did you ever realize how many women miscarry? What if I get all attached to it and sort out my whole life to have a baby, and then I miscarry?”
“Don’t worry about that,” Brittany said. “You’re young and you’re healthy. And if you do miscarry, it just means that you and Ian have to do it again.” She lowered her voice. “I mean have sex.”
She was trying to make me laugh again, but I just couldn’t. I was feeling too miserable. “If he ever wants to look at me again.”
“I’m sure he will,” Brittany said, rubbing my back. “I’m sure he’ll be home any second, and he’ll give you the biggest hug and tell you that he just needed some time to think about it, just like you did. You know he called me last night to ask if I’d seen you.”
I gave her a guilty look. “Sorry. I was out for a walk. I just needed to clear my head, and then I went to this diner and got pancakes and coffee, just like you and I used to do during school when we had boy drama. Only then I realized that I’m not even allowed to drink coffee anymore.”
“You should have called me,” Brittany chided, but she didn’t sound upset. It was more like she just wanted me to know she was there for me. And that helped, but not as much as it would help to know Ian was there for me. It was his baby too after all.
“Maybe I should just get rid of it and pretend like this never happened,” I whispered. I’d been wondering that ever since I found out about the baby. I didn’t really want to do that, and I knew Zach would probably give me even more shit about irresponsibility if I did, but I was scared.
“You’re going to make a great mom,” Brittany insisted again, brushing my hair back from my face.
Just then, I heard Ian’s keys in the lock. The front door swung open and he stepped inside. For a moment, he just stood there, staring at me. I glanced at the clock. It wasn’t that late, but it seemed like I’d been waiting forever for this moment.
Brittany was already on her feet and gathering her things. “I’ll leave the two of you alone to talk,” she said. “But seriously, Abigail, if you need anything, I’m here for you. Unless you want someone to beat up Ian, in which case I’m probably not the best person for the job, but I can find someone who’s better suited.”
I barely heard that last bit as she ducked out the door. I was too busy staring at Ian, who didn’t seem to know what to do with himself.
“I’m sorry,” he finally said, his shoulders drooping. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you before. I was just so surprised that you were pregnant, and I guess I felt a little betrayed that Zach knew before me. That I had to find out from him instead of from you.” He shook his head. “He knew everything first: that you loved me, that you were pregnant.” He gave me a rueful smile. “Apparently, he knew that I loved you first, too, even before I realized it.”
“Apparently?” I asked hoarsely.
“I went over there when I left,” Ian admitted. “I needed to talk to him, to figure things out. Just like what you probably did with Brittany, although with fewer tissues.” He took in the pile I’d made on the table, and I felt myself blush a little.
I looked away from him. “I really was planning on telling you,” I told him. “I really wanted you to be happy about it. But I wanted to fix things with Zach first so that we could all be happy and not upset with one another.”
“I know,” Ian said, coming over to the couch and gingerly sitting down next to me. “Did you really have to tell Jason before you told me, though?”
“I didn’t really plan on telling him,” I said, shaking my head. “He just wouldn’t leave me alone about getting back together, and I knew that would do the trick. Anyway, it just popped out of my mouth. I had just found out about the baby before I went over there and it was on my mind, and I just said it.” I shook my head. “I wish I could take it all back. You should have heard what Zach said to me.”
“He said he’s sorry. He wants to tell you that in person, too, but he told me he thought I should probably go first.”
I blinked at Ian. “He’s sorry?” I asked, my voice full of hope.
“He’s sorry,” Ian confirmed. “And I am, too. I’m sorry I overreacted, and I’m sorry I panicked.” He reached tentatively over and put a hand on mine. “I love you, Abigail, and I don’t know what the future is going to have in store for us, but I want you to know that I’m going to be here for you.”
“Good,” I said, breathing out a heavy breath I hadn’t been aware I was holding. “I’m going to need you. I don’t know the first thing about baby-proofing cabinets, and everything I can find online is pretty confusing."
Ian laughed, pulling me into his arms. “We’ll figure it out,” he said. “All of it.”
I tilted my face up toward his, wanting to kiss him, but I held back, not sure what he was thinking. If ever there was a time to define our relationship, it was now. “Are we still…” I trailed off, not sure how to finish that question.
Ian’s eyes twinkled. “Roomies with benefits?” he asked teasingly, leaning down to kiss my mouth. “I think we’d make better roomies with extra, extra benefits.”
I laughed and pulled him into another kiss, immediately opening my mouth to him.
Chapter 24
Ian
The whole time I was kissing Abigail, all I could think about was that I loved her and she was carrying my child inside her. It was a heady feeling. I was hard, yes, but I also felt more connected to her than I ever had before. I wanted to take care of her, I wanted to pleasure her, and I wanted to make sure she knew how special she was to me.
I knew I shouldn’t have run off like that when she told me she was pregnant. I’d finally left Zach’s and come straight home, relieved to have fixed things with him but anxious to see what was waiting for me back at the apartment. In part of my mind, I imagined Abigail had run off, that she’d decided she didn’t want anything to do with me anymore, and that she’d gone to Brittany’s or back to her parents’ or somewhere else.
Clearly, I wasn’t mature enough to have a baby with her if I couldn’t even have a conversation with her about having the baby. I had been hurt, but that was no excuse. I knew she hadn’t exactly planned this either, and I could only imagine she was feeling hormonal and lonely at the moment.
I should have been there for her, and I hadn’t been.
When I got back to the apartment, the scene that greeted me was almost worse than I’d expected. I almost wished Abigail had packed her things and left. Seeing that she’d been crying, that Brittany was the one she’d had to rely on, hurt me even more. I felt terrible.
I was only grateful that she seemed to have forgiven me.
“I really am sorry that I ran off before,” I whispered against h
er lips, nuzzling her chin.
“I really am sorry that you had to hear it from Zach first,” Abigail responded.
“I’m also really sorry that I got you pregnant in the first place,” I said. I still wasn’t sure how it had happened. It had to have been a broken condom, but how could we not have noticed?
That was a stupid question, though. With as mind-blowing as our sex had been, we were both pretty out of it afterward. I had a sneaking suspicion it had been while we were at the gym. We were in such a public place that I’d just tied off the condom and quickly fixed my clothes. It could easily have happened there.
I kissed the tender skin beneath her ear and then nibbled lightly on her earlobe, making her moan. Her legs spread open on the couch, but I wasn’t going to take her here again, not tonight.
Tonight, I wanted to show her how special she was to me. She was the mother of my child, my love.
I stood up, pulling her up with me, and led her toward my bedroom. Our bedroom. I was getting ahead of myself, maybe, but if she was going to have a baby, we were going to need a nursery, so it only made sense for her to move in here with me. I’d broach that subject another time, though, when we’d both had time to think all of this through.
For now, I slowly stripped off her clothing, kissing each new piece of skin that I uncovered. First, her collarbone. Then her breasts and her belly. Then her thighs and the soft skin in between them.
She ran her fingers through my hair, and I looked up at her from my position on my knees. There was something deep in her eyes, but she didn’t need to give voice to it. I already knew. It was, “I love you.”
I stripped off my own clothes, leaving them in a heap on the floor. Slowly, I walked her back toward my bed. Our bed.
The air in the room seemed to sizzle with the strength of our feelings for one another. She was mine and I was hers, and we loved one another.
I stroked my fingers down her body, leaving a trail of goosebumps in the wake of my roving digits. Abigail trembled, her breath catching on the tiniest of needy whimpers.
I knew exactly what she was asking for. My mouth sucked a mark in the side of her neck, claiming her, while my fingers slid into the slick space between her legs. Her knees fell open wider, her heels pressing into my lower back, urging me closer.
I palmed myself a couple times, already well ready to slide inside her, but I still hesitated. “Should I grab a condom?” I asked.
She giggled. “I’m already pregnant,” she pointed out. Then she turned serious. “I’m clean. I get tested.”
“I am, too,” I told her.
She didn’t say anything else, but I took that as her agreement. I slid inch by inch into her pleasure spot, groaning as she clenched around me. It was so incredibly intimate like this, nothing between us, not even a thin piece of latex. I could feel so much more, her wetness and the texture of her silken skin.
I gave one quick, experimental thrust, and Abigail gasped, her head falling back and her hands twisting in the sheets. Another quick thrust and she was coming, her back arching helplessly.
I gave her a moment to recover, watching as she caught her breath and pried her eyes open. She blinked up at me, a lazy smile spreading across her cheeks. “That’s a little embarrassing,” she said. “But I needed that.”
I kissed her soundly, delving into her mouth even as I began to use my rod to delve into her other cavern. “Not embarrassing,” I said as we broke apart. “God, you’re incredible.”
Abigail flushed all over with pleasure, her smile turning a bit shy. She whimpered as I changed the angle. I tangled my fingers in hers, pushing her back into the soft sheets.
“Do you think you can come again?” I asked.
“Probably,” she said, turning her face into her arm. “Fuck, that feels so good.”
I slowed down, letting her feel the drag of my member against her folds. I came nearly all the way out of her before thrusting fully back in. My hands stroked her skin, tweaking her nipples and dragging down her sides. I pulled my fingernails lightly across her belly, and she shivered.
“Please,” she whimpered.
I smiled benignly at her, picking up the pace a little even while I still reveled in the feeling of her tight walls around me, her soft skin tugging at my skin as I pushed into her and slowly withdrew.
I could tell she was close to coming again from the way her whimpers increased in frequency. Her hands grabbed at me as though I were the only thing anchoring her to consciousness. She clenched tighter and tighter around me until she was practically a vise that I was pushing into again and again. But it felt so good, squeezing bolts of pure lust right back into my core.
I flicked her nipple and then captured her mouth in another kiss, this one steamy and passionate, absolutely filthy with the strength of my desire for her. She came hard, holding me close, our bodies sticky with sweat as they moved against one another’s.
The third and final time she came, I was about ready to finally come as well. There wasn’t much build up to it on her end; she was already sated from the first two orgasms she’d had. Even though she moaned out my name and her fingers on my hips urged me to keep thrusting into her, to keep using her, she was basically spent. Her body sagged back against the bed as she smiled beatifically up at me.
I lowered my mouth to her skin, kissing her all over, teasing her with my tongue and tasting the sweetness of her. She was everything I could ever hope for, and she was the mother of my unborn child.
With that thought in my mind, I came.
Afterward, I managed not to collapse on top of her, but it was a near thing. At the last second, I rolled to the side, pulling out of her with a groan. We were both utterly spent, and we stared up at the ceiling, our fingers still twisted together on top of the sheets.
I smiled up at the ceiling. “We’re having a baby,” I said, my voice quiet, reverent.
“We’re having a baby,” Abigail echoed tiredly. She rolled onto her side, propping herself up on her elbow and staring down at me, her fingers tracing aimless patterns on my chest. “You’re not mad at me, are you?”
“Takes two to tango,” I pointed out. “Anyway, once I got over the initial shock, I’m kind of excited. Nervous as anything, but excited.”
A slow smile broke across Abigail’s features. “Me too,” she admitted. She flopped onto her back, staring up at the ceiling again, and I knew she was picturing life with our little one, just like I was.
“What do you think it’ll be?” I asked. “A boy or a girl? I know we’re not going to actually know for a few months, but don’t you have some sort of mother’s intuition?”
“I didn’t even know I was pregnant until yesterday morning, and that was only because I missed my period and I was afraid I might be,” Abigail groused. But she smiled. “I think it’s a boy. Don’t ask me why. I just think it is.”
“A boy,” I said, grinning as well. “We can teach him how to play catch, and to skate and ride a bike.”
There was a pause. “You know, you don’t have to be okay with all of this,” Abigail said after a moment. “I’d love to have your help with everything, but if you don’t want to, I’m the one who’s stuck carrying the thing, and I can raise him on my own.”
“You don’t have to do that,” I said, pulling her over into my arms and holding her tight. “I want to be there for you, and for it. Him.”
“Good,” Abigail said, breathing out a long sigh of relief. She relaxed against me, and I kissed her shoulder blade.
“You don’t have to worry,” I murmured.
“I do,” Abigail said. “I start a new job on Monday. What if they get mad when they find out I’m pregnant?”
“You didn’t know you were pregnant when you accepted the position,” I pointed out. “And the person who interviewed you, that was a woman, wasn’t it? I’m sure she’ll understand. Anyway, they can work you hard for months before you have to worry about anything. And if they fire you, I’ll personally hand-deliver y
our resume to all the local businesses in the city and we’ll find you another perfect job. I promise. Unless you want to be a stay-at-home mom. That would be okay, too.”
Abigail smiled. “What if you want to be a stay-at-home dad?” she asked. “Someone’s got to earn the money around here.”
I laughed. “As much as I’m excited for the little one, I don’t think I have what it takes to be a stay-at-home dad,” I told her. “But we’ll see. We’ll figure it out.”
“I don’t know,” Abigail said. “You do make a pretty good cook.”
“We’re going to make a great team,” I said, already envisioning it.
“Is Zach really okay with everything?” Abigail asked worriedly. “You should have heard some of the things he said.”
“He was just upset. We had a long talk,” I told her, again tightening my arms protectively around her. Zach had confessed some of the mean things he’d said to his sister, and I’d just about punched him. Fortunately, he’d agreed that he deserved a good punch or else I actually might have done it.
I shook my head. “He thought he was losing his best friend,” I explained. “And on top of that, he felt like he was losing his little sister, like you were all grown up and you didn’t need him anymore. I told him that was ridiculous and reminded him that we’re right here, just an easy walk away from him. And I reminded him that with the baby, we were going to need him more than ever. We’ll need Uncle Zach and Aunt Mikayla.”
“Plus Auntie Britt,” Abigail murmured sleepily.
“Plus Auntie Britt,” I agreed. “And your parents and my parents, the grandparents, I’m sure they’ll want to spoil the baby rotten as well. This kid is going to have so much love in its life, it’s not going to know what to do with it all.”
“Good,” Abigail whispered.
I kissed her again. “Get some sleep,” I told her. “Mommas deserve it.”
“I’m not a momma yet,” Abigail protested.
“Well, get some sleep anyway,” I said, amused at the almost petulant, pouty way she’d said it. “You’re my girl, and you deserve it.”