Monochrome My Madness
Page 7
The driver’s door swings open jolting my mind back to the here and now, game face Shannon he needs to believe in this personality. In that split second, my heart plummets as if it was me falling off the building. Neil doesn’t want anything from his brother; he wants something from me. He knows what happens to my suitors and is waiting for Callum to disappear. Motherfucker.
I am just a weapon in his pointless, childish fight.
Callum’s large frame takes all the air out of the car and my breath with it. He commands attention just by existing now that my purpose has become a little clearer I swallow the lead lump in my throat as he swerves into traffic and winds his way towards the hotel where he is staying. I can feel my cycle starting I have a victim, I cannot control the compulsion. The urge to kill is impossible to ignore, I know now I am allowed to kill him. It is just a pity I don't have what I need to do it tonight. I feel trapped so close to him with no way out my heart is beating so loud it drowns out any other sound.
A valet takes the keys from Callum before he walks around the car and opens the door for me holding out his large hand for me to take. My brain screams don’t touch him, but I can’t help myself I slip my hand into his for support and he helps me from the car. He doesn’t let my hand go as we walk into a large lobby where there are people looking at us his touch is like a hot flame burning into my skin. A beautiful girl behind the lobby bar gives me a death glare alerting me to the fact that he has obviously been there already, I knew he would be a man slut like his brothers and their boys. I lost my concentration and Callum pulls me closer with a harsh tug as we step into the elevator. The doors ding closed leaving me in a small space with a very dangerous man. My body betrays me; it is hot and needy and wanting the hand he has grasped around mine to be all over me. I stare at the reflection of us in the mirror walls, his green eyes brimming with all kinds of evil, my small petite frame next to his. The way my red hair stands out against the black of his suit, the way my little hand looks in his. When his eyes catch mine in the mirror, I can’t pull my gaze away he looks into my soul, and I know he can tell that I am not what I seem. He gets a filthy grin on his face, and he yanks me around into his chest, so my back presses against his hard body. I can feel that more than just the muscles are hard right now. Callum wants me, and he thinks he is going to get me; I see the lust in his eyes as he continues to stare in the mirror. His hands work down my sides slowly exploring my body with a possessive touch that sends the wrong kind of shivers down my spine. I am not easily possessed and those who try - fail. I feel the ice flowing in my veins, but the heat of his touch igniting my skin, I am conflicted by this man. I have never felt both before always one or the other.
Always, fuck or kill. Never want. I want Callum, and that is a very dangerous thing to want for both of us, because I need to kill him, and soon I will want to kill him too.
Eighteen, that’s the number of times where I felt ice, run through my veins when a man touched me, the number of times I turned cold and my heart became frozen. The number of times Neil has cleaned up after my mess and the number that has earned me the nickname The Poisonous Princess. I have something wrong with me; I have had since I was fourteen, and they made me this way. I am not sure what it is; I call it the madness. I was controlled, my whole life run by rules and then, I snapped. I will accept your rules in life, but in my bed and my heart I am in charge and when challenged I cannot control the need to remove the challenges permanently. My personal choice, poisons. They cause a horrific death that makes my heart skip a beat and spreads a smile on my lips. No man will tie up and dominate me in the bedroom; they dominate my whole fucking life I will not give them that! When they tied me up and raped me while my father laughed, they replaced the colour, the normal in my life with grey. My compulsion was born in that violent moment, and I cannot make it stop. I have no control over the haze when it takes over, just like I had no control over what they did to me or what my father did after that.
But Callum, can I kill him? I doubt it. I know he will want to dominate me he is trying already, and I am not sure why I am feeling more than the urge to kill right now. I need to stop it at least until I can speak to Neil, the sly fucking bastard he knew this would happen. He wanted to use me again. I will never help him, not if I can help someone else instead.
The door dings again as it opens air rushes in, and I can breathe a little better. I step forward to remove myself from Callum, but his grip is solid, and he isn’t letting me break the contact between us. It feels good, but so wrong. He walks us to his door with me in front of him, his whole body propelling me forwards. I cannot have sex with this man tonight I need to stop this before it starts. My body knows it’s started already, and he won’t give up easily. I am in trouble - with no easy way out of it. The ticking clock in my head is already started and Callum’s time will run out.
He lets go of me only long enough to remove a key card from his pocket and push the door open then his hands are on me again forcing me into his space. The suite smells of him and the fresh flowers in the foyer. His hands leave me, and he sits me down on the couch in a small sitting area before he goes to pour two glasses of scotch at the small wet bar.
He places the glasses filled with the amber liquid on the table and takes a seat on the chair opposite me. Those evil eyes are raking over every inch of me, trying to read me, to tell if I am really going to go along with his plan. Looking for my soul - he won't find anything here. Only filthy dirty poisonous murder.
“Shannon why does Neil want me to date you so very badly?” His voice is thick and rough as the words roll off his tongue. I am pretty sure I know why now, but do I divulge that to him, gut feeling, yes…head absolutely not. Follow your gut Shannon and trust him.
“I have a good idea why, it just dawned on me earlier tonight. He claims he needs to keep you here but I do believe that’s a lie.” I go with gut; sometimes our heads are full of shit so far my gut has kept me alive and out of prison. My head can be as angry as it wants I am going to die no matter my choice.
“So why do you think he wants you date me?” His expression doesn’t change he is still trying to see if he can trust me; I need him to believe me. I want him to trust me, and that’s just stupid. He is cold and calculating right now. His shoulders square, a furrow in his brow as he contemplates me and my answer. He is like a walking men’s underwear advert. My silly female hormones rage at his masculine perfection.
“Because he is pretty confident the first time we have sex you’ll end up dead.” I try keeping my voice calm and light so he cannot see that I am nervous. I want him to know how much I would enjoy killing him. I want him to know that this uncontrolled need to end him won’t just go away. Not now that he has touched me.
“I doubt you are that good my pretty ghost.” He laughs a loud, deep laugh and sits forward in his chair looking me dead in the eye. “Your sweet pussy couldn’t kill me Shannon.” The amused smile on his face tells me he has no idea how dangerous it could be. He thinks I am joking. Grey, grey, grey - I want to kill him.
“Oh, it’s not my pussy he is worried about Callum. Have any of your brothers or the other guys mentioned The Poisonous Princess to you?” Calm stay calm, don’t let him see you are scared of him; you can still kill him if you need to, it will just be harder now. His face drops, I know they must have - it has only been a month since they collected the hot doctor from my flat and disposed of him. A smile tugs at my mouth as I remember watching him as the poison paralyzed his respiratory system suffocating the life out of him. “You see dating me would be awful for your health yet it is the only way I can guarantee I stay alive. I am The Princess Callum! I kill men who try to push me around in the bedroom; I watch them suffer as they die begging the beautiful doctor to save them. I am not going to make a good wife. I cannot have children, and I will be tempted to kill you every day. I am not going to be good for you.” I will never be good for anyone, my father made sure I’d be a monster that no one would ever love.
He doesn’t understand, “Callum it’s not something I can control, I have triggers things that set it off and then I cannot stop it.” I try to swallow, but my mouth and throat are dry; I cannot get my drink behind him. A little liquid courage would help right now. I know that my cycle has started I have tunnel vision of his body arching in agony as he dies, and I will not be able to stop it until he is dead. I have tried before. It cannot be stopped. I need the high that death brings me.
Callum sits right next to me, and my heart rate goes up even more. I can feel my pulse in my temples and the pounding in my chest. “I don’t need to have sex with you ghost I have others that can keep my dick warm. I want to keep you alive, you see my intentions aren’t what they seem either. I am also here to kill.”
His words wound me for no reason, of course, he won’t sleep with me now, knowing I am a serial killer. I don’t know why that hurts my feelings a little. Why do I even have feelings? Who is he here to kill? I wanted him to want me, and that is just too many different kinds of wrong to process. He murdered my sister, and he will kill me without a doubt. I know he will never trust me now, not when it comes to not killing him that is. I will always want to kill him; that's how it works, and he carries on like nothing is wrong. Like I am going just to stop and be his little wife.
“You and I will go and look for a suitable house tomorrow, and then you will move in with me, where I can watch you ghost. You can let that new doctor takeover, you won’t be doctoring anymore. You will make my brother believe we are in love, and you can’t kill me, even if you want to. If you want to kill me, you tell me and I will find someone for you to kill. I have lived close to killers for a long time, and I know it’s about scratching an itch, chasing the high. You belong to me now and you better just accept that. I plan to be the king of this family and you can be my cold-hearted queen, or you can be dead? Pick one Princess, but I am the one man you will never kill. Understood?” I will kill him. If it the last thing, I do on this earth I will kill Callum O'Reilly, and I will enjoy every minute.
All I can do, is nod my head, he hasn’t killed me, but he just took my life. He claimed it, and I know he is right. My gut, head and heart tell me that I belong to him and even if I want to I won’t kill him - not just yet. For now, I want this. Whatever this is? It feels good, almost as good as murder.
“And let’s be clear, just because I don’t need to fuck you doesn’t mean that I won’t.” He leans in smelling my hair, running a finger along my jaw then over my mouth. “I’m going to fuck you because you belong to me, and I want to. Am I clear? Wipe that stupid, scared, confused look off your face you are an intelligent, calculating killer you understand exactly what is going on here.” He puts his hand over my heart skimming my breast as he goes. “Your body betrays your mind ghost.” I am screwed, and he is right. “This is a terrible idea Callum, please don’t” He doesn’t even hesitate at my words.
This man is far more dangerous than anyone anticipates. If I don't kill him, he will kill me.
Callum kisses me again now, this time I let my body betray me completely, I let him control me, and it feels so fucking good. He pulls me up off the couch against his body and whispers across my shoulder. “I am going to fuck you now, and then we are going to your surgery, and you will kill my nephew.” My heart cannot beat any faster at his words; they are fuelling my lust for him and my lust for killing all at once. How can he know what I need so quickly? He is manipulating me, and I hate that he can. I am the one who manipulates everyone around me into believing what I need them to.
Callum
There is always a ghost behind the monster driving its darkness and feeding its soul.
The Poisonous Princes, it makes sense now. Neil thought she would kill me; he underestimates my charm and how much I learned from being best friends with a killer my whole life. I saw a little devil in her eyes the second we met.
You see - monsters, villains, devils, demons - whatever you call them they live in us. We either set them free making us whole, but empty or we suppress them, force them out leaving half a person making us weak. I have admitted for years that I am a villain, I wasn’t always a killer and I don’t get my kicks killing, but make no mistake I will kill if I want to. I just feel it when I do and I don’t like to feel. The evil in people like us has to be fed, it is a need as much as the air or water to us. My monster breathes to torture and break others.
But I can say that the thought, of watching this evil little ghost killing someone, has my cock aching. I can feed her monster, train it, grow it and use it for my own benefit keeping her strong and making her mine. I don’t understand my need to possess her. If I really wanted to own a woman, I trade in them I could have my pick of well -trained meek little love pets. I want this deadly beauty something fierce. I want to take the little princess and make her a queen, my queen and I will start tonight and after killing my little shit nephew she will be mine.
She looks just like Cassie, but her inside is not pure, sweet or good she is evil just waiting to explode. She is sweet and drips sex appeal, but there is a switch that will turn that goodness into a deadly woman I just need to find it and learn how I can use it. I want to see what makes the monster come out to play with me.
I plan to turn the princess into my very own murderous mate. Neil wants me to have a wife- oh I will have a killer wife the world will be jealous of.
Just as I plan to drag her to my bed caveman style my phone rings in my pocket, I want to ignore it I really do, but I can’t. I see Art’s number and I swipe the screen to answer his call walking away from the woman I was seducing to take care of my business. I turn and see she is sitting her eyes are on our whiskey glasses again.
I guess I am done with my scotch.
“Art this better be good I am busy!” I bark at the man on the other end of the phone irritated at the disturbance at such an intimate moment. Not his fault, but I hate being interrupted
“Warrick is no longer a problem I thought you should know he had a little party tonight.” His words are serious and all business, this isn’t personal to him it’s a job and one that keeps him alive. “Good, who knows about it?” I need to know if Neil is in a flat panic yet.
“So far just the boys who were with him and some whore he was fucking when he died.” I am suddenly no longer interested in my brother; he no longer exists that’s all that matters. “Art, did you know who she was, I mean do you know what she is?” The line is silent, traitorous fucker. I wait for him to give me an answer, but my patience is short. He knows exactly who she is.
“I have an idea that you may be pursuing the Poisonous Princess as the guys call her. I have never been called on one of those jobs, but I understand she is not the best lover in the world that is if you want to live. Don’t fuck her boss, stay away she belongs to Neil their agreement goes far back and he cleans her mess.”
He is wrong about who owns her, Neil knows her secret but she betrays him every chance she gets she is my princess now. “You didn’t think about telling me this before I had her in the room ready to fuck her senseless Art?” I want him to know I am angry that he would risk not telling me what he knew.
“You didn’t seem that interested boss.” He sounds genuine, but I am irritated by his betrayal and lack of forethought.
“Neil doesn’t own her, I do. Find me a fucking realtor I need a house tomorrow. Goodnight Ar
t. If I’m dead in the morning it, was her.” I don’t wait for him to answer me. I hang up and walk back into the room where she waits for me. I don’t know what I was expecting, but this is not it at all. I should be feeling for my dead brother, but I’m not. I am feeling all kinds of filthy things for the woman in nothing but lace and garter's sitting in my chair with fuck me eyes and a body I want to bend to my will. I want to hurt her. I want her to feel it. I am going to break her. The way, my cock is reacting to just looking at her, is a warning of exactly how this will end. I stalk closer to my prey and pull her hair to expose her beautiful neck.
“The idea, of killing someone, makes you hot in all the right ways doesn’t it princess, I promise you will get your fix later. I will help you feed your monster and you will help me with mine. We are a match made in hell.” She smells so good this close, her milky white skin with a dusting of freckles calls to me. She looks innocent and safe, but there is definitely poison in there I don’t think I will ever trust her, but I still want her. Why do I want so badly to dance with her shadows, she is death? Why does she make my heart race?
She makes my cock ache and my monster roar with a need to mark that perfect body with my torture, to brand her as mine. She is mine.
THE SKY IS TURNING GREY as the sun is sinking behind the clouds that keep it from us. Callum is on the phone he stepped out of the room. I could just slip something in his drink and be done with this, but I don’t have anything with me and his eyes told me he won’t be drinking anything I was left alone with. I don’t want to be done with him, I want him. I want him to fuck me then let me kill that little punk I left in the surgery. The anticipation of the kill, even if it’s not Callum has me excited I get the butterflies and goosebumps just thinking about it. Maybe we can make this dynamic work, after all. My blood burns hot and freezes for him all at the same time, he knows me better than I know myself and we haven’t even met properly. I was only eighteen when he left, he hasn’t been home since. I have no idea who he really is, he was just my sister’s friend and killer. I have no doubt that belonging to Callum is precisely what I want right now as wrong as it may be. I can be his queen for now and when I cannot do it any longer we will kill each other. There is no way we will survive this pull towards each other, we are doomed to die.