“You guys didn’t fight did you?” Michelle said as she nudged me, trying to get my attention. I shrugged again and she stood up and pulled the ear plugs from my ears and said, “How selfish of you. You know that he’s got a big game tonight!”
I had visions of her in between the pair of us last night when Noah said that talking about his mom wasn’t exactly sexy. He was right, that was the last person you wanted to discuss when you were in an intimate situation with your lover.
I could have lied.
But I’m so shit at that. “Yes.”
Then I stood up and headed out, anywhere as far away from her as possible. Michelle and Dad started to argue, and I wandered if it was Princeton making us all feel this way. I turned around and watched them continue to fight. I thought, I need to make it up to Noah. Sometime, and that time was now.
I sent him a text. One that I hoped that he would respond to:
Babes, please forgive me :(
Within seconds he said:
We need to talk, but after the game xox
It wasn’t much to go by, but those kisses meant the world to me. I held on to my phone and my attitude changed; I was all ready to go to the game. Michelle wouldn’t bother me. She couldn’t, not after today. Never ever again.
***
“Hey Ava where you been?”
Shoot, I knew that I’d forgotten to do something. Today, I’d been supposed to call Trinity; it had been a while since she went to college in Boston.
“Sorry, I got distracted. Can you believe that Noah’s playing college football already?”
She shouted, “Shut up.”
“I know. I felt the same way. But we’re here to watch the game.”
Trinity said, “Hey, and you said nothing. Well guess who else is here this weekend?”
It didn’t take a genius to guess who was there that weekend. “Eli?” I smiled, thinking that at least my friend was happy. I could hardly hear anything as the game was about to start.
“I’ll call you after the game.”
I put the phone down, because whatever she said after I just couldn’t hear. That was when the game started and everything that was supposed to be right, just ended up being completely wrong.
“Shit, what’s up with Noah?” Dad asked as he missed another pass, and he just kept on missing them.
I started to get paranoid, especially after the first couple of touchdowns. I had seen Noah play so many games, but none like this. It was a hot mess. I couldn’t believe it. That was when things turned from bad to worse. The crowd were boo-ing, not so much about the result but about Noah.
The guys behind us were shouting, “Get that new quarterback off the field!”
“Shit, we’ve never been this so far down so early in the game!”
His mom got up all of a sudden after Noah was sent off for fighting with another player. The whole game wasn’t exciting or even interesting. It was just in bad taste.
She blurted out as she pushed past me, “I hope you’re happy!”
I was far from it. Dad held my hand and said, “Ignore her.” I tried to do that, but it was so damn hard. Impossible, as I saw the man that I love being sent off for trying to attack the opposition. That wasn’t like him. His game was off. His attitude was bad and, as much as I tried to dismiss it out of my head, there felt like only one thing to do, and that was to leave.
I wondered if he did send me those text messages. I looked at my phone once again and it was Noah. His texts were full of kisses and made out that we just needed to talk. I felt guilty, as if it was my fault that he was so lost in the game. Maybe I was the reason he lost his rag.
“Dad can we just go home?”
He didn’t answer as he took my hand and kissed it. I really wished that he didn’t have to go back on the road. I wanted him to stay and, as we finally got out of the stadium, he said, “I had good news for you. I was going to tell you later, but I may as well tell you now. I’m not going on the road again.”
I didn't want to know the reason why. He was right that it was good news. Apart from the hurt burning in my heart about Noah, it was the best news ever.
Chapter Seventeen
That night I didn’t hear from Noah. I did what I thought was best that night. I thought about what I was going to say, until Michelle walked into my room, turning on the light without permission. She was so rude and, as many times as I had told her not to do it, she still continued all the same. That was why no one liked Michelle. Not only was she rude, but obnoxious too.
“Noah, said you guys had some sort of fight.”
She was flushed, her cheeks were red and she was angry. Real angry. But I didn’t care. I had my laptop on my bed and it was nearly midnight, and I had been trying to write an email to Noah. I couldn’t face him. I couldn’t speak to him. It was a coward’s way of doing it, but one that I felt needed to be done.
She was wearing her gold night slip. Everything about her was perfect on the outside, with her hair in a bun and as usual she had make-up on; not as heavy as she wore during the day but I could tell that she still had foundation on.
I choked out, “Yes.”
Had Michelle finally got the message that we were a couple who loved each other?
“Do you think that had something to do with his attitude on the field?”
She was calm. Not the hyperactive woman who had left the stadium claiming that it was because of me that her precious son had lost it on the field. No, she was more assertive and, for once in her life she was being nice.
“I hope not.”
She shook her head as I sat up and faced her.
“I didn’t ask what you hoped, but what you thought?”
I nodded my head. I hated to admit it. I’d spent the whole time in the car convincing myself that this wasn’t going to happen. Our relationship wouldn’t affect his career. His dream. His aspirations. But the more I thought about it, I knew that it wasn’t true.
“So, what did you do about it?”
She knew the answer to the question and the whole idea of her wanting me to say it out loud annoyed me. Her whole presence was driving me insane.
“I went home with you and Dad.”
She nodded, “You didn’t even try to clear the air.”
Maybe that was because you have spent the last couple of months telling me whenever we have had the odd conversation, which wasn’t often that the relationship between Noah and I was bad. Real bad.
“That’s because …”
She stood up and walked to the door. I wished she would just stay out of my room and life, once and for all.
“You caused him to lose his dream. I just hope to God that they give him another chance,” her words were fast and vile. But just like Michelle, she continued batting her eyelashes and appearing to be the perfect saint.
“You didn’t even apologize to him. Instead, you blamed me. Blamed me for you going out with that realtor and spending more time with him than you should do, and then getting on Skype and showing Noah what you’ve been doing with him.”
Where the hell did she get all this from?
Sure, I had spent time with Keith. He had only been at the realtor a year and it was easier to follow him and learn the ropes, than it was with the other realtors, who were more experienced and felt that I should be photocopying, answering the phone and getting them lunch. He was the only one that treated me with respect.
“I didn’t even mention him to Noah. I feel,” God knows why I was begging her. “That maybe I’m in the way of his college life and he’s not enjoying it as much as he should do, because of me.”
I walked towards her trying to make her see reason, because I had a bad feeling that he’d lost his rag on the field, because of me, and because of what this poison Ivy was saying to him.
“You go and see him after weeks, the night before the game, and you know the rules,” her hands were on my shoulders, like they always were whenever she was getting ready to patronize me. Whenever
she had a good reason to put me down. Her hands slide down my arms and eventually land in my hands. She’ll entwine them with hers and then she will say her killer line. The one that will make me doubt any sense of reality. The one that will only make me see things her way.
“You know the best thing to do for him. The best thing to do for both of you. Tell him that you’ve moved on. It’ll hurt, but at least he can focus on his career. Focus on the one thing that he’s dreamed of doing his whole life. That is what a friend would do. Especially a best one.”
This time she didn’t seal it by gripping and dropping my hands. This time she sealed it with a kiss on my forehead. The one that a mother would give to a child.
I wished that I had some sense of relationship with my own mom, but I knew she wasn’t interested. I couldn't remember the last time that I had seen her. Right now I needed someone, anyone, and it felt like Michelle was my only friend, as within minutes Dad knocked on my door and said, “Good, you’re awake. I need to go on the road again. I promise that it won’t be for long.”
I was like a statue. Frozen in my very existence. It felt like only a few seconds ago that Michelle had left my door. It could have been hours, but I didn’t care. I needed to write that email and, as Dad said he was leaving once again, I knew that I had to do it now. I couldn't put it off any longer.
Chapter Eighteen
The next day I couldn’t go to work. I sat staring at my computer reading my email to Noah over and over again.
Dearest Noah,
You’re my best friend and lover. But this needs to end. We are so far apart and I hate to tell you like this, but I’ve met someone else. Don’t contact me. Goodbye. I hope that you keep your head in the game.
Ava
I stared at my phone, hoping that he would ring. It kept going round it in my head. What did I want? For him to turn around and say that everything would be okay and for us to keep going on like this, or to just move on. I had told him to do it. Keep his head in the game. It was a lie; I just wanted him here with me, like he had always been. But it was clear that I was being selfish. That I was only thinking of myself, and I couldn’t do that any more. Not only for his sake, but mine too.
No, this was for the best. I just wished it didn’t hurt so bad.
“Why is it so dark in here?” Michelle asked as she walked into my room. Yesterday that annoyed me, but today it offered some sort of comfort. But I couldn’t figure out why.
Maybe because, for some crazy reason, Michelle was the only one that knew what was going on in my world. Since I had started working at the realtors, my phone calls to Grandma had been few and far between. Trinity and Carly were both all loved up with their men.
Shit!
I had been supposed to call Trinity after the game. I’d completely forgotten.
“This isn’t healthy, Ava. You can't be doing this to yourself. What about I make you a nice steak? That’s your favorite right?”
I had to blink my eyes and I opened them wide. The voice sounded like Michelle’s, and even the red power suit that she wore to work looked like Michelle’s, but everything else was completely different. The person in front of me, smiling as if she was sent from above, wasn’t behaving like Michelle. She was behaving like Trinity and Carly’s moms treated them. This had to be a dream. It just couldn’t be real. But as she patted her sides and said, “Get showered and dressed, then meet me downstairs,” I concluded that it was Michelle.
I slowly crept out of bed, ignoring her instructions. “Why are you being so nice?”
She smiled as she went down the stairs. Hesitating, she faced me. “You broke up with Noah.”
Then she hummed as she went to the kitchen.
He got my email.
Or message.
Or my text.
I repeated the same thing, just so that I wouldn’t change my mind. I wanted to know what he’d told her and how he felt about it. But then the realization that I knew the answer to my question made me feel sick.
The last thing I wanted to do was take a shower, or even eat.
No, I wanted to stay in my room. The idea of never being with Noah again made me feel physically sick. I crept back into my room, drew the curtains, and went back to bed. I thought about the happier times. The ones of us together and it made me feel good. It made me feel alive again, but I knew that I could only feel that way in my dreams. Not in my reality.
***
“Dad are you here or are you in my dreams?” I asked as I felt a hand on my shoulder and a kiss on my cheek.
He seemed old, tired, which was unusual for a man who prided himself on being fit. Now he just looked over weight and middle aged. He had drawn the curtains, and I wondered if it was day time again. The last time I remembered sleeping this much was when I’d had the flu and Grandma had come and brought me her favorite chicken soup every day.
Within two days I was feeling better. But the warmth of my bed and the company of my grandma made me pretend that I needed to stay in bed just a little while longer. Just so that I could have some loving tender care. The type I used to have with Noah.
“I’ve been home a few days now, and this is all you ever seem to do.”
I didn’t get his point. What had I been doing all day?
“Sleeping!”
Maybe he saw the confused look on my face, which meant that I was totally confused, because I didn’t have a clue what he meant.
“No matter what, tomorrow that is it. You’re coming in with me. I’m not having you mope around here all day long like a love sick teenager, whilst Noah is out there having fun and enjoying his life.”
My ears pricked up at that.
“Why isn’t he coming home?”
That was the original plan, he would come home and I would sometimes go and visit him. I had hoped that after my message he would be the one to bring us together. Make me see sense and we could come up with a plan. A realistic one, after he knew that this thing we were doing was not working.
“Well, you have a new man, and I think he’s got a new girl.” Dad said scratching his balding head. Then it made sense. Perfect sense. I had told him to move on and that was exactly what he had done.
“Wow,” I said as I sat up and thought about how quick and easy it was for Noah to move on. He didn’t even bother fighting for me.
“Wow, what?” Dad said as he stroked my chin. I lifted my arm and the smell nearly made me sick at the realization that I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d bathed.
“That was quick.” I sounded like a kid. Wishing that her best friend had called round to see her after she’d had a fight with her. The same way I used to do when we were kids. Hoped that Noah would love me so much that he would want to know what was bothering me. What was on my mind. The problem was, we were adults and he was a college student. Going on to better and brighter things. Maybe this whole thing was really about the green-eyed monster wanting attention.
“He’s a good looking guy. You didn’t want him. Did you expect him to be sleeping and moping and walking around the college dorms for six weeks?”
I looked at Dad as if I had seen a ghost.
Did he say six weeks?
“Six weeks?”
He chuckled, “Sweet pea. You’ve been in and out of your room. Just not responding to anyone. I thought you would snap out of it. That’s what the doctors said. Besides I thought that Trinity and Carly were coming last weekend, but then something came up and they couldn’t make it. So, I thought I needed to deal with this. I needed to step up as a dad and help you out of this, instead of always expecting others to do it.”
It sounded like I wasn’t the only one that needed to grow up. So did Dad. But there was just one problem. One part of the equation was missing and I was scared and completely in shock when Dad had said six weeks. Not for the reason he just gave me, but for another.
Chapter Nineteen
“Girls, I need you to do this with me.”
They both nodded. I
’d called them immediately after Dad had left the room. All of a sudden I had a spring in my step and a new lease of energy. One that was going to be spent learning the truth. Shit, I was scared.
Trinity said, “Yeah, but we can’t pee on the stick with you.”
“I remember this one time, or it could have been three…” Carly started counting on her fingers. “Yes, yes, it was three times that Ryan and I nearly had this scare.”
All three of us were staring at the pregnancy tests, wondering which one to pick up.
“Go on,” Trinity encouraged her to say what it was on her mind, but then she went off into a daze and said, “Oh nothing.”
Which meant there was more to this story, and Carly wasn’t ready to share with us what happened next. Which in my mind was a good thing, because I really didn’t want to hear it.
“Okay, this one looks good. It comes with a calculator,” Trinity said, as she was brave enough to not only pick one of the shelf, but read it too.
“Great, it tells you how far gone you are!” Carly snatched it out of her hand. “That’s so cool. We’ll try this one.”
We both stared at her. Did she really think we were clothes shopping or something?
Then Trinity was brave again and picked out another one. “What about this one? Just the two lines, and they have two in a pack.”
I nodded; I really wanted the expensive calculator one, but deep down I knew that there was no reason to take the test. I knew the results, I just didn't want to admit to them.
I had been in bed for over six weeks, drifting in and out of sleep. The only good thing was my laptop got a rest. I may have showered every couple of days or so. Gone down to the kitchen. Grabbed whatever didn't require anything more complicated then warming up. Ate. Then went back to bed. That had been my routine for six long weeks. Not once did I get a sanitary towel or tampon. That could only mean one thing.
The Quarterback's Baby: A Secret Baby Sports Romance Page 5