I sit opposite him. “It’s small. One bedroom. And sits on the banks of the river. The inside needs cleaning out. And it could use a lick of paint throughout, but it’s solid…I put in an offer earlier today and it was accepted straightaway. It’s time, Greg. Not just for you, but for me as well.”
“I should never have tied you to me the way I did. Instead of being an ass, I should have just been honest to begin with like Matthew begged me to do. I’ve hurt you, and the man that I love. I’m not sure about making the announcement at work, but I’ll agree that in our personal life it has to stop.”
I’m surprised that he’s being so understanding for a change and I’m presuming that I have Matthew and his sister to thank for that.
“If you hadn’t got me to help with keeping your secret, I wouldn’t have the practice that I have today. And I wouldn’t have met Aiden.” I shrug, not even knowing what is really going to happen with Aiden, if anything. “I’m not suddenly doing this because of him. I need you to know that. He is responsible for giving me the push, but after talking to Kris today, I knew that it was time.” I offer him a wry smile. “It’s going to be strange living on my own after all these years.”
“You’ll be fine, Sarah. Plus I’m not exactly going too far, huh?”
“You’re going to move in with Matthew?”
“I am. I was going to offer to continue paying rent on this place so you have somewhere to live, but I guess you have your own plans.” Greg smiles and takes my hand. “I know I haven’t always been easy to live with and I’m sorry for that but regardless you’re still my friend and I’ll help you in any way I can, so please don’t be afraid to ask. My offer of help will always stand.”
Tears prickle at the back of my eyes at Greg’s unexpected words. “Thank you,” I whisper. “We’re really going to do this?”
Greg squeezes my hands in his and lets go. “Yeah”—he clears his throat—“we are.”
Sighing heavily and feeling so mixed up, I drop my head into my hands. Seconds later I feel Greg’s hands on my shoulders.
“I need to tell you something and I really didn’t want to be the one to tell you.”
My heart thuds in my chest at what he has to say. “What?” I whisper.
“You’re not the only one who has been looking to purchase a property I was in the realtor’s office earlier to ask them to take my name off the lease but to keep the monthly payments coming out of the same account.” Greg sits next to me. “On the way out front, I saw Aiden there with Rae, and he was asking about two bedroom properties in town. He looked kind of friendly with her.”
And isn’t that the icing on the cake. My mind spins and no matter how much I try to tell myself they are purely friends my heart aches.
“Look, Aiden lives here so he’ll know the area. He could just be helping a friend out. I thought you should know, but at the same time please don’t jump to the wrong conclusion until you’ve spoken to him, okay?” Greg pats my hand and quickly disappears to his bedroom.
For now I will carry on with the purchase of my own home and just wait to see what happens, because I’m so very tired of everything, especially of the constant jealousy.
AIDEN
Lucia has been looking at me as though I’ve grown two heads or something for the past couple of days and I don’t know why, and part of me is afraid to ask. Although I’ve always called her Lucia, she’s been my stepmother for more years than I had my real mom. She’s always been there for my siblings and me regardless of how we treated her to begin with, which hadn’t been pleasant.
She’s also not known for holding her tongue, which has me worried as I lean against the doorjamb in the kitchen watching her knead bread.
“How long do you plan on standing there before offering to help me?” Lucia asks, a soft smile on her lips.
I laugh. “Now, Lucia, you know how my bread always turns out.”
She snickers. “Come and keep me company then.” Her right brow raises and I know that there is no escape at the moment.
Sitting myself down opposite to where she works, I inhale and the fresh aroma of bread teases my nostrils. I love that scent. It always reminds me of when I was a little boy.
“What’s going on with you, Aiden?” She looks closely at me and makes me want to squirm like a child. “And I want the truth.”
Her words surprise me because I’ve only ever been honest with her. Lucia has always had my respect, and lying isn’t something I’ve ever done with her since I grew out of my rebellious teenager years.
“Don’t look like that. I’m not accusing you of anything, but I want to know what is really going on between you and Rae, especially as I haven’t seen you around Sarah for a while.” She stares, letting her question sink in before she concentrates on the bread.
I’m not off the hook and need to answer, but I’m not sure how. “Rae has only ever been a friend and that’s all she ever will be. As for Sarah…I love her. She’s bought one of the cabins near the river, but I’m not sure whether or not she still has plans to be with me.” My heart aches at the thought and I know that it’s something we’re going to have to talk about. There is so much guessing and presuming between us that we really do need to sit down and talk.
“You do realize”—Lucia interrupts my thought—“that everyone is tongue wagging about Rae being your girlfriend. No one believes a word about you just being friends.”
“You included?” I ask, annoyed that there appears to be gossip going around that my own family believes.
“I want to believe you, but I’ve seen you both together…all the time, Aiden. When you’re together you’re always touching…a hand here, a caress there. You smile at her most of the time when you’re having a conversation. You basically act like lovers.”
I open my mouth to deny all of what Lucia has said when I realize that she’s right. Until recently, I’ve never thought about it before because it’s just always been so natural between us. I have a feeling that no matter how many times I tell them that Rae is like a sister to me I won’t be believed. It sounds like a case of ‘protesting too much’.
“I guess we do look guilty. I can’t say I’ve ever thought much about how we are when we’re together. Rae is a beautiful woman but I’ve never been interested in her in that way, and I know that she isn’t interested in me either.”
“Then why haven’t you been following Sarah around? You’d be out of the house like a shot the minute she’d pull up before. Now that Rae is here I haven’t seen you looking for Sarah for a week or two.”
Six days since I last saw her.
I frown. “Sarah’s still been here?”
Lucia gives me a funny sort of look. “Of course she has. She’s the only vet in town and a damn good one. Your father won’t have anyone but Sarah look after the animals. You know that.”
“I haven’t seen her around.”
“Probably because she’s tried to stay invisible, and you’ve been too busy or distracted to notice.” I hear censorship in her words.
I drop my head into my hands. “I haven’t seen her in six days. She hasn’t messaged me or replied to my message asking if she’s okay. I’ve been busy with filming and working around here. Most nights I’ve had the intention of going to see her.” I run my hands through my hair. “I guess I’ve also been putting it off because I’m tired of her not trusting me.” I look at Lucia and let her see how much I’m really hurting because I want and need Sarah’s trust.
“How can she trust you when the gossip about you and Rae is hot and you’ve stayed away from her?”
“She knows I’m only friends with Rae,” I mumble. “I’m exhausted, Lucia.”
“Well, get some rest while Sarah isn’t around. Your father told me she’s left town with Greg for a time.”
My head snaps to Lucia who suddenly seems more interested in the dough than the news she just dropped.
Gone where with Greg?
“Oh,” is the only response that I can
muster.
“I’m worried about you, Aiden. I always am.”
I walk to Lucia and place a kiss to her forehead, my arm wrapping around her shoulders. “I love you…please don’t worry about me.”
Needing five minutes to get my emotions under control, I make it to my room and stare out of the window.
Hearing that she’s left town with Greg froze my heart and sent my head spinning with confusion. Why would she do that when their marriage isn’t real? Did he lie to me about being gay?
I hate feeling jealous and I realize Sarah must feel the same when she thinks of Rae and me, and the feeling isn’t nice.
11
Sarah
It’s been three weeks, two days, and four hours since my last encounter with Aiden when we’d had our hands all over each other in the barn.
I was out of town for a week during that time ironing out the terms of the divorce with Greg’s lawyer.
Where at one time I would have felt excited about the prospect of being single and free, now I’m just going along with it knowing that it’s something that needs to happen. There isn’t much for me to celebrate when the man that’s inside of my heart has been very elusive.
Not one word from him.
I’ve been so tempted to message him, but part of me wants him to be the one to get in touch first so that I know his attention isn’t purely on Rae, except I guess that’s where it is.
I’ve tried not to let the lack of contact distract me or ruin the joy of buying my first real home. The one with Greg doesn’t really count as we were only roommates, because we didn’t have a real marriage, and the house was leased.
Regardless of my gloom, I smile as I watch Greg and Matthew maneuver my refrigerator so it fits just right with the counters. It’s cream colored with a large fridge on the top and the freezer on the bottom. It matches the stove and the cheap wooden table and chairs that I bought from the secondhand store in town.
I’m not sure what I would have done if I’d fallen out with Greg because both he and Matthew have been no end of help in getting me moved into my new home.
I don’t have that many personal things to move in. In fact, I have more books than anything else, which the men complained about while they carried box after box inside.
After working most of the day, my cabin is looking more like a home and I couldn’t be happier. The smell of fresh paint lingers from last week when we painted throughout to give the place a renewed, welcoming look, but it’s nothing bad now.
Tonight will be my first night spent inside these walls, and my belly has a nervous flutter. Greg and Matthew offered to buy me dinner to celebrate, but I declined. I just want to be alone and sit in the peace and quiet of my new home.
“How’s that look?” Matthew asks, stepping back from the fridge. “Look’s good I think.”
I smile and bring my attention back to the kitchen. “Perfect.” And it is.
Greg wraps an arm around my shoulders and holds me close. “Are you going to be okay, Sarah?”
“Yeah.”
Matthew chuckles. “That didn’t sound very convincing.” He raises a brow. “You’re more than welcome to stay out at the farm with us.”
I’ve gotten to know Matthew in these past few weeks and he is a genuinely nice guy. The distraction of having Greg move in with him has helped keep my own overthinking at bay.
“I know that,” I answer in reply to Matthew’s invitation. “I also appreciate it, but I’ll be just fine here. Please don’t worry about me.”
“Um,” Greg clears his throat, “you’ve heard the rumors going around about Aiden, right?”
Unfortunately.
“I’ve heard them,” I reply, refusing to meet his gaze. That’s another reason why I haven’t gone to talk to him.
“Look, you know how rumors can be wrong, right? I mean everyone thought that I was having affairs with different women when it’s only ever been Matthew…All I’m trying to say, Sarah, is that sometimes people get it wrong. Talk to the man and find out what’s going on because there’s already been too much guessing about what Aiden is up to on your part. Start trusting him.”
I smile. “Thank you.”
“And the rest,” Matthew mumbles, and Greg looks sheepish.
“Rest?” I query.
“I, um, blocked Aiden’s number in your phone.”
I stare at him in disbelief, stunned he’d ever do something like that, or when, considering my phone is always with me. At least it explains why I haven’t had a call from Aiden.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, but I saw what the rumors were doing to you and I wanted you to have some peace. I’m really sorry, Sarah.”
I should be angry but I don’t think I am. Aiden knows where my practice is, which he’s been to before to see me. He could have easily gone there when I didn’t answer his messages…if he sent me any that is.
“It’s done and I’ll unblock him. See if he’s sent me anything.”
“I’m not sure old messages come through when the number’s unblocked. I think it only affects new messages.”
“Oh. I’ll leave it then. I’ve had enough really.” I avoid meeting their eyes.
“Go talk to him.” Greg smiles, and kisses my forehead. “Don’t let him just walk away after waiting for so long.”
I nod, wanting to just be alone. I’ve had so much going on for so long that I want peace and quiet now. I want to sit out back and relax on my porch while drinking coffee and listening to the sounds of the country.
Smiling, I hug both Greg and Matthew and watch them drive away before I move from my spot in the middle of the kitchen.
My car is pulled around back, and I lock the doors before heading into my pale green bathroom to take a shower and wash away the grime of the day.
Next stop will be a glass of wine and the pasta I purchased earlier from the deli while I sit out back with a good book.
AIDEN
“I swear if you’re not going to do something about Sarah, I’m going to hit you over the head with a bottle of beer,” Rae shouts. “This isn’t like you…and from what I’ve seen of Sarah, she’s faring just as well. I seriously don’t get it.”
“There’s nothing to get,” I add when she pauses for breath.
“You’re an idiot. You need to make sure she’s okay. What if she had to leave town because something happened. You don’t know, Aiden.”
I run my hands over my hair. “There has been plenty of time since.”
Rae pauses and then throws her arms up in the air. “Ugh…men!”
Lounging back on Rae’s new sofa, I rest my feet on the coffee table and close my eyes. Tiredness follows me everywhere these days.
Rae is right, I need to go and talk to Sarah, but why the hell should it always be me? I’ve had enough of doing the chasing. I love the woman and that isn’t going to change anytime soon, but dammit. I’ve messaged her and messaged her with nothing going through, which tells me that she has my number blocked and that pisses me off more than I can say. Why? What’s changed between us?
Many questions run through my mind and I’ve just tried to concentrate on getting Rae settled in Great Falls.
The two-bedroom cabin that she’s bought is perfect for her and her daughter, Andie. It’s the first home that Rae has had since Andie was a few years old and I’m glad that she chose to settle close to me. Of course that has set the tongues wagging yet again. There was a time when we’d both find it amusing, but now it’s more annoying than anything, especially when my own family doubts me…it also makes me wonder what Sarah believes.
In the end though, I’m sick and tired of denying things between Rae and me, and as for Sarah, I’m frustrated with her and myself.
“You know what I think you’re doing?” Rae nudges my feet from the coffee table and sits facing me. “I think you’re trying to give her a taste of what it’s been like for you.”
I frown, wondering what the hell she’s talking about. “Car
e to explain?”
Rolling her eyes, Rae then adds, “You fell in love with her while she was taken by another man, so…gossip around town is that we’re in a torrid affair and you’re moving in with me. You know this and I think you want her to believe the worst of you for whatever reason that is going on in that thick head of yours.”
“I’m not—”
“Yes, you are, and unless you do something about it, you’ll probably lose her.”
Is that what I’m doing?
“It’s self-preservation, but, Aiden, I’ve never known you to not react.” Rae takes hold of my hands and squeezes. “Please talk to her and ask if she’s okay. Tell her you need to know whether she’s changed her mind and wants to stay with her husband.”
My eyes widen in surprise as the last few words leave her mouth. That isn’t a possibility. He’s gay.
Rae smiles. “I see the fire in your eyes now.”
“I’ll go and find her tomorrow.” I sit forward. “I’m tired, Rae…I’m tired of my family looking at us as though I’ve lied to them about our relationship…I’m tired of the gossip…and to be honest, I’m tired and I guess a bit disheartened to always be the one to do the chasing…reassuring…what happened to her trust in me?”
“There’s nothing much I can do about the ‘us’ that everyone thinks there is, but try and look at Sarah’s situation from her point of view. She’s a married woman, Aiden. Until she met you she was probably plodding along in her marriage, and then bam, you knocked her off her feet and caused her emotions to explode. She’s having to chose between right and wrong.” Rae taps my knee and I meet her gaze.
“You know I’m right.” She smiles. “Just nod and say, ‘You’re always right, Rae.’”
I laugh and feel lighter than I have in a while. Rae is half right though. I did come along and knock Sarah off her feet, just like she did me. However, Sarah has never been the married woman in the sense Rae thinks. “You’re not always right, Rae, but I’ll admit that you made some valid points.”
Love in Country: De La Fuente Family #4 Page 7