He winced. “Experience tells me when someone asks for permission first, the question is going to carry a wallop, but go ahead.”
“It’s about the killing.”
He rested his head on his palm and watched her. “Carl?”
“You.”
“Wait.” His hand dropped to his side. “What are we talking about?”
“You’ve hinted that . . . well, in your past . . .”
This time he shifted until he sat up, leaning against the pillows. “Are you asking if I’ve killed people?”
With the sheets wrapped around her, she eased up to sit next to him, careful not to touch him in case he didn’t want to be touched. “I’m trying to figure out why you’re familiar with killing.”
“You are strangely calm about this topic.”
She put her hand on his lap and sighed with relief when he slipped his fingers through hers. “I’m not afraid of you, if that’s what you’re trying not to ask.”
“Why?”
“Why?” He continued to stare at her despite her stunned response, not showing any signs of explaining the question, so she tried another tact. “I’ve lived my entire adult life detached after spending every year before that as the only responsible one in my household.”
His body came alive then. He didn’t move, but energy pounded off him. He was interested and engaged. “What about your parents?”
“My dad was long gone by the time I could talk.” That was the easy part. “My mom . . . uh . . .”
He squeezed her hand. “Would it be easier if you knew when I first met you I had a file on you?”
She shifted to face him. “Meaning?”
“It’s part of what I do for Wren. I collect information.” He brought their joined hands up to his mouth and placed a quick kiss on the back of hers. “I know your mom died when you were seventeen.”
“Do you know the details?”
“I didn’t look. Didn’t think they were relevant.”
She laughed but she there was no amusement in the sound or inside her. “Some people think my past explains why I am the way I am.”
“Loving? Smart? Driven? Sexy as hell?”
“Aloof.”
He shook his head. “I’ve told you before. That one doesn’t fit.”
“She battled depression and these incredible cycles where she moved and talked at hyperspeed. It was nonstop. No sleep. No eating. Just racing around and solving these puzzles that only seemed to exist in her head.” More than a decade later the memories clicked into place. She didn’t have to dig to find them. No, she’d spent years trying to smooth out the edges and file them away. “She hated the meds because they made everything dull and colorless.”
“That’s a lot to handle as a kid.”
“That was easy compared to the times when nothing mattered and she wanted out.” Lauren gulped in air but it did nothing to ease the lump in her throat. “She tried and failed, then one day she succeeded.”
“She killed herself.” Garrett cradled her hand in both of his now.
“Ran her car into a tree.” Lauren rested her head against the wall and fought off a punch of grief. This one was new, fresh. A reminder that her job had always been to take care of other people. The only thing she learned was not to let her emotions engage, not get close enough to get sucked under again. “She was on the phone with me at the time.”
He didn’t say anything but he did move. His arm came around her, tucking her in close to his side. His thumb rubbed her shoulder and his lips brushed her hair. He enveloped her in a comforting hold that made her feel cherished and safe.
She’d tried to explain her upbringing to other people. Told them parts of the story and watched the pity overtake them. Heard every comment about her mother “being in a better place now” and how everyone had someone like that in their family. They all meant well, but the words and those lame phrases only caused her to shut down faster.
Garrett didn’t try to make her feel better in the usual ways. The hug was so much more effective, so she closed her eyes and fell into him. For just a few minutes let her mind clear. Pushed out the list of things she needed to do and handle and worry about, and let the sound of his steady breathing guide her.
“The killings.” For almost a minute that’s all he said. “Before I worked for Wren I worked for the government. My official career was with the National Geospatial-Intelligence Agency.”
She froze. She debated saying anything because she was desperate to hear him talk, to know more about what had shaped and created Garrett McGrath. “I don’t even know what that is.”
“It’s about monitoring and assessing data and images and where people and military equipment are located and how they’re shifting.”
“Just say spy stuff.”
He laughed. “That’s a line losers give in bars to get sex.”
“I can’t imagine it works.”
“Who knows? I’ve never tried it.” He settled deeper into the pillows as his body relaxed. “The point is I did do that work, but that’s not really who I worked for.”
She separated from him and sat up, letting the sheet dip in front of her but not caring. “Oh, my God. So, I was right. Actual spy stuff.”
“I did black ops work, which I can’t talk about and don’t want to, but that’s where I saw death. That and a mix of bad decisions, questionable management and unnecessary loss of innocents.” He exhaled. “And you are the only one outside of a small group of friends—small as in five—that know that.”
“I trust you, too.” The words popped out but she meant them.
He cupped her cheek. “I lost my parents when I was a little older than you were. Just a kid, really. Every choice I made after that, including seeking out a career that I believed allowed me to know the unknowable, both at the agency and now, stems from the car accident that took them.”
A chill ran through her. Their lives, so different on the surface, mirrored each other in some ways. Early deaths defined them and their decisions. Losing people they loved shoved them onto a path that made them responsible for others.
She understood him.
“If we were dating I’d say we just learned something important about each other.” She tried to make a joke but the tone didn’t come off right.
Tipping her mouth up, he kissed her. Slow and sweet until the end when he treated her to that sexy tongue. He lifted his head again. “I agree—we definitely learned one important thing over the last few days.”
Those eyes, that rough voice—she was mesmerized, hanging on his words. “What?”
“We are dating.”
Chapter Nine
The alarm on Garrett’s watch sounded at two in the morning. He’d re-routed the new silent alarm at Lauren’s house straight to his watch. Actually, Matthias had, but the result was the same. It got Garrett’s attention.
He’d been on his side in bed, curled around Lauren’s naked body, finally drifting off to sleep after hours of touching her. Now he was up and dressed. Freezing his balls off on the sidewalk in front of her house with Lauren at his side.
He really wanted to leave her back at the hotel, locked in and safe. She made it clear when she got dressed and threatened to kick him that she did not agree. “This could be dangerous.”
She didn’t look at him. Her focus stayed on her front porch. “More dangerous than those two guys walking around with guns while they try to fade into my shrubbery?”
The men, dressed in black and carrying, stalked the house. They moved around the grounds, without a sound and out of sight. They only popped into view when Garrett pulled up a few houses down. But they’d been on site since Carl’s body was found, blending in and slipping into the darkness when needed.
“They work for Matthias.”
She nodded as she tucked her hands in her jacket pockets. “That’s oddly comforting.”
Garrett agreed. Matthias only hired the most qualified. His teams were trained, serious and lethal. They o
beyed orders and did not mess around. They also breached the house as soon as Garrett called to say the motion sensor went off but had no luck catching anyone.
One of the guards slipped around the house and in just a few steps stood in front of them. “We checked. No one is in there.” He spoke to them but his gaze continuously scanned the area. “No obvious signs of anything being taken.”
“How did anyone get around you?” Lauren’s sounded fascinated, not accusatory.
“Not possible.” The guard met Garrett’s gaze and held it for a few seconds. “It’s a false alarm.”
Garrett did not want to get in the middle of a pissing match. He knew better than to go up against a guy carrying at least three weapons. And those were the ones he could see. Garrett was pretty sure there were more, but he didn’t want to test the theory.
“Save that for your boss.” He nodded at the guard then looked at Lauren. “Stay here.”
“Not happening.”
Garrett was pretty sure he saw the guard smile at her refusal but Garrett kept his full attention on her. “Lauren.”
“You can say my name as many times as you want. The answer will be the same. No.” She unzipped her jacket and headed for the front door.
“Don’t smile. It only encourages her.” Garrett mumbled the comment under his breath to the guard before reaching out and snagging Lauren’s arm. “You stay behind me and don’t touch anything.”
“In my own house?”
He used the key he’d made to open the front door. “These comebacks. You really are on your game at two in the morning. I need to remember that for next time.”
“I’m hoping this doesn’t keep happening.”
Garrett didn’t respond because he didn’t disagree. He slipped inside, careful not to disturb anything. He’d turned off the sensors to keep his watch and Wren’s console back at his office from going haywire.
He glanced around the room. Didn’t spy anything out of the ordinary. He remembered the layout of the floor and had studied the photographs enough times to know where and how Lauren kept everything, down to the box sitting next to the couch filled with Christmas ornaments.
He didn’t need that reminder. Time ticked down to the holiday, Garrett’s least favorite of the year. His only comfort came in slipping away in quiet each year. He’d been dodging decorations and holiday displays for months. Lauren hadn’t put up a tree yet, but the box was clearly marked.
Walking around, he realized he couldn’t hear anything. The room was silent. She’d stopped talking and her boots didn’t sound on the floor. He whipped around to find her standing over the spot where Carl’s body once rested. “Lauren?”
Her face was drawn and devoid of color when she glanced up at him. “The floor is clean.”
He wasn’t sure what to do here. Did he usher her out or put an arm around her? He honestly had no idea what the proper protocol was for this sort of thing. For his work cases, Wren had a team of people who came in and took care of the hand-holding.
After a few seconds of indecision, he went with talking. Nothing else. “I had a service handle it once Detective Cryer gave me the okay.”
Her mouth twisted in a frown. “Someone had to see that?”
“It’s a specialty company. They clean crime scenes.” He could see her sharp intake of breath and took a step toward her.
Instead of breaking down or yelling—both would have been understandable—she shook her head and inched back from the now invisible outline of blood. “That sounds like a terrible job.”
“But necessary.” He went to her this time. Rubbed his hands up and down her arms. “Anything obvious?”
She gave the area within view a quick look. “No. Could this have been a false alarm?”
Anything was possible but Garrett didn’t believe in coincidences. “We set up motion sensors. Something set one of them off.”
Her eyebrow lifted. “How did you manage that?”
That tone he recognized. She brought it out when dealing with business matters and when she thought he was trying to walk over her. It bugged him at first but now it was one of his favorite things about her. It meant Lauren was Lauren. She wasn’t locked in the past or swept away by anger or grief.
“Carl came here for a reason, possibly to look for something since he waited until you weren’t here to come in. If true, I thought the person who killed him might come back looking for the same thing.”
“Whatever that was.”
“Exactly.” Garrett wasn’t used to explaining his actions. Wren gave him a lot of room to maneuver. Garrett had worked Kayla’s case with Matthias and had his trust as well. “There was a small chance, so I took it.”
“Smart.”
The tension pinging around the room died down. “Thanks.”
She stepped into the kitchen and opened a few cabinets. “Any chance you set up cameras, too?”
He guessed there was a right answer to this. He knew what it was. He hoped she did. “Actually . . .”
Her head shot around and she looked at him again. “Really?”
“A few. I called Wren. He’s checking the feed.”
She treated him to a small smile. “You guys take this stuff seriously.”
“Your being in danger? Yes, I do.”
She started to say something but stopped when the front door opened. Matthias stepped in wearing a suit without a tie, further convincing Garrett the guy didn’t own anything else.
“Hey.” Matthias kept his hand on Kayla’s elbow as he ushered her inside. “She insisted on joining me.”
“Of course I did.” Kayla glanced at Garrett. “But I couldn’t convince him to wear the casual clothes I bought him.”
Garrett winked at her. “Next time.”
“What are we looking at here?” Matthias asked as he stepped further into the living area.
Lauren pulled a water bottle out of the refrigerator and motioned to the rest of the room. They all shook their heads and she kept it for herself. “Matthias, I don’t understand how someone got around your guys and got in here.”
Matthias smiled at Garrett. “You didn’t tell her that part?”
Confusion spread across Lauren’s face. “What?”
Garrett had figured this was part of the setup he and Matthias discussed. Now he had confirmation. “When you want to trap someone inside, you lure them in. You don’t make it hard.”
“Did you leave her door open?” Kayla asked.
“That would be a rookie move. Too obvious.” Matthias shrugged. “Cracked two hard-to-reach windows in different locations in the house and someone took the bait.”
Kayla leaned up and kissed Matthias on the cheek, not an easy feat since the guy was about six-four. “That’s pretty hot.”
Since Garrett would rather be anywhere but at the house that held all the bad memories for Lauren, he kickstarted the conversation. “We had an alarm in the bedroom and one in here. The place is clear of intruders but who knows what else we might find.”
“We’ll get started in the bedroom,” Kayla said as she reached out for Lauren’s hand. The two of them disappeared into the other room a second later.
Garrett headed for the front windows then crouched down to check the sensors. He expected Matthias to head for another part of the cottage but he loomed right there. It was enough to make Garrett stand up again. He knew something was coming.
“Having a good night?” Matthias asked from right behind Garrett.
He knew Matthias well enough to know the question he asked was not really his question, and he braced for more. “Up until a half hour ago.”
“Still just being a bodyguard? Doing bodyguard stuff?”
That didn’t take long. Garrett had been expecting it but Matthias still landed the shot pretty well. “We can look without talking. I’m fine with that.”
“Be careful.”
The change in Matthias’s tone had Garrett paying attention. “A warning? Really?”
For a gu
y who excelled at negotiating and strategizing, he seemed to be doing a pretty shitty job of maneuvering through his relationship with Lauren. He’d dated before. He had no idea why this was so different. So much bigger. Whatever it was, it made him careful with what he said.
“This time I’m worried about you, not her.”
“I’m trying to believe we’re having this conversation.” Garrett would be happy to have it end anytime now. Really.
Matthias scoffed. “That makes two of us.”
He took off for the kitchen at twice his normal speed. Garrett had to smile at that. Matthias was not a man known for running from anything. But Garrett still needed to make a point. “We’re seeing if there’s anything between us. Just . . . you know, seeing.”
Matthias stilled. “Do you hear yourself?”
His stammering was tough to miss. Even Garrett had to admit that. “Unfortunately.”
“You swoop into town—”
“Swoop?” Not a word Garrett ever remembered saying before.
“You might have just started sleeping together, which is the only explanation for that stupid look on your face, but you guys have been circling each other for months. Dating without dating.”
Garrett was pretty sure that was more words than Matthias had said all last month. But he did say something worth noting. “I tried to tell Lauren about that dating part but she was in denial.”
“Women.” Matthias shrugged. “Look, I’ve never seen you like this before. With anyone. She might not be ready even if you are. Maybe go slow.”
Garrett heard the tone. Not Matthias’s usual grumbling bark. No, this was something different. “Is this warning from Kayla or from you?”
“I don’t care about any of this.” Matthias opened the refrigerator and took out something in a plastic container. He studied it but didn’t open it. “You’re consenting adults.”
That was more like the Matthias he knew. But Garrett didn’t buy it. Matthias wasn’t the type to meddle. The uncomfortable talk was his way of saying he cared. That mattered to Garrett and he was close enough to Matthias to accept the advice without mentioning the emotion behind it.
Negotiator, The EPB Page 8