by Lynn Galli
After a long while, M gave a self-conscious, nearly inaudible laugh. Her head dropped in a defeated motion and shook slightly.
My hope faded as she struggled with herself again. Seeing her lose faith in herself was heart wrenching.
When she raised her head again, she stepped forward, filling the space between us. She squeezed my hand, reached for the other, and brought them both up to cup her face. I let my fingers gently tighten on her jaw, loving the feel of holding her face in both hands. The fingers of one hand slid down to trace the side of her delectable neck. I was so entranced by the feel of her skin that I almost missed her whispered request.
“Kiss me.”
My eyes snapped back to hers, heart pounding loudly. “Oh, M, are you sure?”
“I’ve never been kissed, Briony. I want to share that with you.” She raised her hand to lace fingers into my hair, resting her palm on the side of my neck. Her other hand pressed against the door beside my head, bringing our bodies only inches apart.
“Show me how good it can be.”
I swallowed roughly. As much as I wanted this, the added pressure of giving someone her first kiss made me nervous. I tilted my head forward, keeping her stare, trying to send messages of desire and assurance. When I had to, I dropped my gaze to the inviting curve of her lips. I could feel her pulse speed up under my fingers on her neck.
Because I couldn’t wait any longer, I closed the final distance and found heaven with the first brush of our lips. Her head pitched backward in my hands. I kept still, waiting, knowing she’d come back to me. She released a shaky breath that blew across my chin before tilting her face back up. This time, my lips pressed fully onto hers in a gentle kiss that she accepted eagerly. My abdomen felt a blast of fire as soon as she stopped just accepting and started kissing me back. Our lips moved across each other’s mouths, and I had to consciously keep from trying to deepen the kiss. Her lips were supple and persistent and nourishing and addictive.
At the first tentative nudge of her tongue, I moaned loudly, the sound echoing through her silent apartment. Her tongue retreated at the sound, but her mouth continued to explore mine with an expertise that belied her inexperience. When her tongue came back, it pushed forward until it found its mate inside my mouth. I let her lead, meeting every new discovery with approval.
After it seemed like she would accept it, I took over and reached into her mouth. A small sound left her throat, and while I hoped it was a pleasurable moan, I had to make sure it wasn’t too much to handle. I eased up on the kiss softly until its natural end.
Pulling back, my eyes fluttered open to see hers blinking in a startled manner as breaths pumped through her frame. Her first kiss. Judging by her stunned but jubilant recovery, I figured it went okay. Not that my reaction was any different. Had the door not been right behind me, I would have stumbled backward in a daze.
My fingers slid under her chin, coaxing her to look up into my eyes. She trembled slightly, and I tried to transfer my emotions to her though my touch. I wanted to assure her startled eyes that I didn’t expect anything else. That what she’d given me was more than I’d ever fantasized about. “Goodnight?” I asked in a trouble-free tone.
M smiled gratefully then reached for my hand, the one she’d held in the elevator, and squeezed. She didn’t have to say anything. The astounded look in her eyes told me that she’d been as overjoyed as I had by our first kiss.
I turned around, ready to open the door when I experienced another undeniable urge. Since they’d not failed me with her so far, I went for it. “Oh, M?” I turned back to face her. “The fall’s over. I’m in.” I watched as interest furrowed her brow. “I love you.
I thought it was time you heard that.” Her expressive brown eyes glistened, but thankfully, she wasn’t panicking. In fact, she looked so amazed I wanted to burst into tears for all the years she’d gone without knowing what it felt like to be loved.
“And I loved that kiss.” My still tingling lips stretched into an elated smile. “If I have to wait thirty-nine more years for another, it’ll be worth it. Goodnight, beautiful.” The stunned expression I left in her doorway would be enough to keep me warm as many nights as it took until she was ready.
Chapter 32
"Mom?”
“Hmm?”
“You’re humming.”
I turned back from unloading the groceries and found Caleb staring at me with wide eyes. We’d been getting ready to make dinner together, and now he looked flabbergasted. “I am? Am I making your ears bleed, kiddo?” I snatched him against me, rubbing my thumbs along his ears.
He giggled and squirmed out of my grasp. “No, but you haven’t hummed while making dinner since…since Mommy died.”
“Oh, sweetie,” I whispered. I hadn’t realized I’d been humming and certainly wasn’t aware that I hadn’t done it in years.
“No, it’s good, Mom. It means you’re really happy.” He stared up at me with his earnest gold-brown eyes. “I’m not a little kid anymore. I know when Holly kidsits at night that sometimes you’re out on a date, right?”
My heart tightened at his declaration that he wasn’t a little kid anymore. Still a half year out from eleven, his gangly limbs were getting longer every time I turned around. “Would that be okay with you?”
“Yeah, Mom. I told you.” He rested his hands on his hips in a very Peter Pan way. “But now you’re humming and you don’t even know it.”
I cocked my head and pursed my lips. “You said that already.”
“You don’t hum for nothing.”
“Really, and what do I hum for, huh, wise guy?”
“Love,” he said it simply and without any resentfulness. “Is it, Mom?”
I took a deep breath and looked my grownup boy right in the eye. “Yes, son, it is.”
“Yippee!” The little boy returned with glee. “When can I meet her? Can she come to dinner sometime? Is she nice? Does she like kids? Is she tall like Mommy? Maybe you can bring her to my soccer game this weekend? Does she like sports? Is she as smart as you? Can she pitch better than you? ‘Cause Hank and I need more batting practice before baseball starts next year. Does she have a dog?”
The rapid-fire interrogation would have continued if I hadn’t grabbed hold of his shoulders. “What’s wrong with my pitching?” I teased.
“Moawmm!” he drew out, fists pounding back onto his hips.
“Seriously, what’s wrong with my pitching?” I demanded.
“You almost beamed me last year,” he said matter-of-factly.
“Twice.”
“Yeah, but I was trying to beam you. You’ll notice that Hank stayed unharmed.” I couldn’t keep my expression serious.
He nudged me with a broad grin. “C’mon, Mom.” I took a deep breath, preparing to tackle his questions in order. “You’ve already met her. She can come to dinner anytime.
She’s very nice. She loves kids. She’s not very tall. I’ll ask her about coming to one of your soccer games but maybe not this weekend. She likes sports. She’s smarter than I am. I’ve never seen her pitch, but no one’s taking over my pitching duties. And no, no dog, and you’re not getting one, either, bucko.”
“I don’t see why I can’t get a dog. Everyone else has a do—” Realization dawned on him. “I met her? Who is it?”
“M.” I waited for a response before I said anything else.
“M?!” he yelped. “Hank’s M?”
“That M, yes.” I smiled at how he classified her. In the past two months, we’d gone to the movies with the boys once, but I’d found it nearly impossible not to show affection. We both decided that I’d need to tell Caleb before we tried another outing together. “Is that okay, Caleb? You have fun with her, and she really likes you. She’s become very important to me.”
“This is so great!” He started hopping a happy bounce.
“Hank’s not gonna believe this. Can she come over for dinner sometime?”
“I’m sure she’d love that.�
��
No sooner had the words left my mouth than he raced to the phone. I assumed he was calling his best friend, who adored M as much as he adored his own grandmother. He pressed two buttons and waited to be connected via the TTY relay service. When he spoke, my heart jumped into my throat. “Hi, M, this is Caleb.” I lurched toward him, stunned by his action. He never called anyone other than his friends without asking permission.
“No, Mom’s fine, she’s right here. So, um, do you want to come over for dinner tonight?” He showed me all his teeth in a big grin. “Yeah, she knows. Mom, tell M you want her to come to dinner.” He held up the phone but danced out of my grasp, giggling.
“Please come to dinner if you’re free, M,” I called out, knowing I’d never catch his wiggly little form when he was determined to play keep away.
“You’ll come? And do you want to come see me and Hank play soccer on Saturday?” He waited for a response before signing off and daring me with a gleeful stare.
“You kind of put her on the spot, kiddo,” I chastised gently.
“I know, sorry. But you probably wouldn’t bring her over till Christmas otherwise.” That dare persisted. “I’m not little anymore, Mom. She makes you hum. I like when you hum.”
“I like it, too.” More than I could express.
Fifteen minutes later, an astonished but delighted M showed up on my doorstep. We’d barely had time to smile at each other before Caleb loudly crashed down the stairs and grabbed her around the waist, hugging tightly. The sight would have made me burst into tears at his obvious happiness if I hadn’t known what this hug would do to M. She’d flinched at first then stood rigidly, her eyes shocked but softening when she caught my surprise.
“Thanks for making my mom hum.” Caleb’s soft voice brought my hand to my heart. M sucked in a breath and raised her hands up to pat his back. He released her and started in on the excited jabber. “It’s taco night, do you like tacos? We were going to make spaghetti, but I thought you might like tacos better. I do.”
“So do I,” she confirmed with a warm smile then turned it on me.
“I still have to grate the cheese, so you and Mom can say hi.” He turned a sly grin my way. “I won’t look, just don’t make all those gross smoochy noises.”
Laughter burst from me at his unsolicited permission. I winked at a stunned M before turning back to my beautiful son.
“I’m now going to make gross smoochy noises all over you.” He squealed and slipped out of the reach of my hands, darting off toward the kitchen. When I turned back to M, she hadn’t recovered much. “Hey,” I greeted in the tone I reserved just for her.
“I make you hum?” she asked, partly bewildered, mostly delighted.
“You definitely make me hum,” I responded seductively.
She grinned and reached to touch my face. This was becoming her standard greeting now, and I loved it. After the briefest hesitation, she leaned forward and brushed her lips against mine. A soft hello kiss, something she’d never initiated before. “Caleb said I could kiss you.”
“Yes, he did.” Now I was the stunned one. “We had a little talk.”
“You must have.” She turned and flicked the door shut behind us. When she reached for my hand, I nearly fell into her from the headiness of this surprising evening. “He seems okay.”
“He’s more than okay. He’s ready to brag to Hank. If you wanted to tell him yourself, I might be able to hold Caleb off for a day.”
She brushed her free hand through the air. “I told Lucille last weekend. I’ll give her a call on my way home tonight. If she wants to say something to him first, she’ll have the chance.”
“What did she say?” I couldn’t contain my curiosity, thrilled that she’d told Lucille about us. That was a huge step for her. I knew how highly she valued Lucille’s opinion.
“That she’d figured it out when she saw how I reacted to seeing you in her living room that day.” She smiled and shook her head. “I’ve never said anything in all the years I’ve known her, but somehow she knew.”
“It’s hard to fool women of that generation.”
“Something I learned with Kathryn,” she confirmed with a nostalgic smile.
“You guys done smooching yet?” Caleb called out from the kitchen.
“Caleb!” I admonished gently. His boldness was getting a little obnoxious, but I knew it was mostly born of excitement. Once it settled down, he’d start to remember his manners.
“What? I’m starving. C’mon, it’s taco night!” I turned back with an apologetic smile. Getting used to a ten-year-old might take a while for M.
She grinned and tugged on my hand. “Yeah, it’s taco night.” Taco night with my son and my new love, nothing could be better.
* * *
Caroline’s last phone call had a threatening undertone.
Unlike the last time she’d summoned me to the café for lunch, this time she meant business. Apparently, Lauren had mentioned the dessert we’d shared at Quinn’s, and Caroline was feeling a little miffed that I hadn’t yet introduced her to my girlfriend. I’d held off her attempts at fixing me up by telling her that I was working on a potential relationship. She’d been fine with that for a while, but now she was insistent. M was due in my office any minute for our lunch date, and I crossed my fingers that she’d agree.
The knock on my door didn’t sound like the one I was expecting. The fact that it opened immediately afterward also told me it wasn’t my girlfriend. My two closest friends on the staff burst inside.
“Howdy, Bri,” Javier offered first.
Alexa shoved him out of the way. It was often hard to imagine these two were respected professors in their fields. “Hello, friend of mine. Lunch?”
“Got plans,” I managed casually. “How ‘bout tomorrow?”
“Mm-hmm,” Javier mused, raising his eyebrows at Alexa.
“Told ya.”
“Told her what?” I half rose out of my chair, wondering why they were acting so suspiciously.
“You’re in luuuvvv,” he sang. “Does she have a cute brother?” Alexa elbowed him, turning a studious gaze on me. “Does she have a cute heterosexual brother?”
I knew I looked like I was doing an impression of a fish, but I couldn’t help it. I didn’t think I’d been acting any differently at work. M and I met up a few times a week on campus, but we’d met up all summer, too. Nothing suspicious there.
“Oh, stop with the shock, sister,” Javier chastised. “Caleb let me in on your little love affair at the last practice.” He was the assistant coach on my son’s soccer team. He’d gotten the job two years ago when he’d been dating a guy with a son. He’d gotten hooked on coaching—the boyfriend, not so much. “Didn’t tell me who, though.”
“I figured that one out,” Alexa declared proudly.
“With the help of a photo, genius,” he taunted back.
Sometimes their code talk was even more complicated than my son’s with his friends. “What?”
“We were headed to my office yesterday and spotted a photo of Caleb and Hank in their uniforms through an open door.
Guess whose office it was?” Javier taunted with a huge grin.
Alexa smacked his shoulder. “It’s the only one she has in her office, so it obviously means a lot to her.” I pushed out an amused breath. Caleb had picked out the frame and wrapped the gift for M himself. He decided that she needed a picture of her two favorite kids—his and Hank’s egos at work—to brighten her workspace. I knew he was just a big ol’ ham who liked having his picture taken. My heart melted when I stopped by her office last week and saw it displayed front and center on her bookcase. “It does, and she means a lot to me,” I confirmed happily.
“She’s your lunch date?” Alexa coaxed.
“Yep. She’ll be here any minute.” In response, they both rubbed their hands together with a plotting look about them. “Be good. Better yet, be gone.”
They tried to look affronted but their mock anger was interr
upted by the sight of M appearing in my doorway. What made my heart jump, other than her appearance, was that she clearly fought the urge to try to disappear within herself when she was surprised by the people in my office.
“Hello, M,” Javier greeted furtively. Both Alexa and I grabbed his arms and yanked him back from crowding her. “What? I was just saying hi.”
“Ignore him,” Alexa advised. “He’s on his fourth pot of coffee today. How are you? Here for your lunch date?” The startled expression M wore turned a shade of pink as it moved into shocked. “Hi,” she offered then looked questioningly at me.
“They were just leaving, right, guys?” I pleaded.
My colleagues recognized my tone, or perhaps they could sense the alarm in M’s stance. “Yep, the coffee’s burning a hole in my empty stomach.” Javier patted his solid abdomen then slid an arm around his best friend’s shoulders. “Let’s roll, sexy lunch honey.”
“Watch it! That’s sexual harassment. You’re both witnesses. I can sue and finally get my roof fixed just in time for winter.”
“You could sue, but my worth won’t be enough to roof your birdhouse.” Yep, respected professors in their fields. A marvel, isn’t it?
Alexa pushed Javier toward the door. He and M switched places so she could get inside. “She’s a good one,” Alexa commented on her way by with a nod of her head in my direction.
“Yes, she is,” M agreed quietly as they both waved and headed down the hallway. She shut the door behind them and turned with yet another version of an amazed expression. I was starting to think she’d never experienced anything good in her life because she was constantly amazed by simple kindness. “Hey, you.”
“Hey, yourself.” I stood to greet her.
That soft hand darted out to slide knuckles against my cheek as she stepped closer. This time, her body brushed a light bump against mine. After only an infinitesimal straightening that pulled her back a fraction, she set her gaze and slowly rested her front against me.