by Joey W. Hill
"Mom," Sam said with mock severity. "No matchmaking."
"Can't help it. It's a mother's right."
***
Her mother had inadvertently pointed to the exact solution Sam had reached herself. The two men together filled all her empty spaces and corners, and she thought maybe it worked the same for them. She hoped so.
Jace, her oldest brother, would probably be the first one to accept it. That thought took her to another get-together, this time a cookout they'd had at their own house, within the past couple of months. They'd invited a few friends and, since her brother only lived thirty miles away when he was home on leave, she'd invited him and his current flavor of the month.
It wasn't as derogatory as it sounded. She usually liked the girls Jace dated; it was merely obvious that he was with them for sexual companionship, rather than a long-term relationship. With Jace's looks and personality, he never lacked for female company to warm his bed when he was home.
Maybe Sam was overly romantic, but she believed it was never too early to find the love of your life, and she wanted that for him. She understood he was pretty dedicated to his military career and didn't feel there was yet room in it to start a family. He was always honest with and kind to the women, so she didn't have to go after him for being a dick. However, given his attitude toward his own relationships, he'd shown a surprising level of insight into her own situation.
At the cookout, she'd left off her teasing of Chris about his grilling style when Geoff had chased her away with a spatula, telling her outdoor cooking was serious man business. Jace was already eating one of the first round of burgers, so she came over to sit with him at their picnic table. As she leaned against him companionably, he gave her a bemused look. "You involved with either of them?" he'd asked in a neutral voice. "Or both?"
She was glad she wasn't eating anything, else she would have choked. Her knee-jerk reaction was to deny, to elbow her brother as if he was making a joke, but since he wasn't playing, suddenly she didn't want to do so, either. She hadn't broached anything with Geoff or Chris yet, though she'd been percolating on it more and more.
Out of all her siblings, she was closest to Jace, so it made sense that he'd picked up on what she hadn't yet voiced to anyone else.
"No and yes. It's complicated."
"Hmm. Can't choose?"
"Don't want to. Not sure . . . if I need to." She stole a glance at him, uncertain what she'd see in his expression.
Jace took a few more bites before he said anything else. "Well, it sounds strange saying this, but you three look good . . . as a unit. And you're happier than I've ever seen you. So whatever's happening or going on, as long as you stay that way, I'd say follow your heart. They're good men. Both of them. But if they fuck you over, I'll kick their asses. You know that, right?"
She put her arms around him. He was wearing his Captain America T-shirt, a gift she'd given him after he finished his first tour in Iraq. He'd worn it so much it was thin and fading. She loved him for that, despite the ribbing she knew friends in his unit gave him about it. "They watch after me as well as you do," she promised him. "They'd never hurt me on purpose. Whatever happens, whatever I decide . . . We'll make our stumbles together, if that makes sense."
"Yeah. Not like me and Traci. She's not all that much into the stumbling." He smiled at the pretty blonde he'd brought with him. She was chatting with one of the wives of Esteban's landscaping crew. "Think she's mostly about hooking up with a hot military guy. When she realizes I'm no different from any other jerk who leaves his underwear on the floor--except I know how to deactivate bombs--she'll split. But it'll be fun while it lasts. I'm not where you are yet, little sis. That could be good, though. If you trip all the land mines first, you can put me on course when I find the right woman."
"Gee, thanks," she said. "Not that you'd listen anyway, you and your dumbass hard head. It's all about boobs and long legs for you."
"Hey, whoever I marry, it will be about way more than that, so it's best to take my fill of the shallow stuff while I can." He winked and pushed his plate at her. "Got any more of those burgers?"
Coming back to the present once again, Sam said her usual daily prayer for Jace, back overseas now, and studied the computer screen. She couldn't read any more of this. She wanted Geoff and Chris. That needy feeling was rising, capturing not only her body but her mind, disturbing her anew. Focusing on her reflection in the computer screen, she could tell she was too wound up. Maybe she should use her vibrator. Maybe more than once. Was it possible to get stuck in an "on" setting when it came to physical arousal? But these waves of agitation were more than being horny, a word she particularly despised for its crudity, so she wasn't sure why she was using it now.
To follow Geoff's rules, she'd need to text or call one of them to use the vibrator. Or she could say to hell with that, do it and not tell them at all. Or ask for forgiveness. She shifted. That wasn't what she wanted, either, damn it. A power exchange was a willing thing. It wasn't like Geoff could force her to ask permission to get off. But the point was she was giving him that control, right? That was what turned her on, as much as it did him.
She shoved away the chaotic roar of her hormones and whatever else was going on in her head and brought herself back to the more important topic at hand--whether this would work long-term. Was she naive to think the word forever when it came to the two of them? She wasn't a teenager anymore.
Maybe it was possible to integrate all of the possibilities and lock them in place with Chris's philosophy of slow living. Soak up the experience rather than worrying it away, all while remembering who and what was important. If they could do that, if she could do that, maybe they'd stumble into the right way to make a go of this.
"Sam, you home? Where are you, crazy girl?"
Things leaped up inside her, like swallowing a chocolate bar down whole. The surge of adrenaline was overpowering, the kind that came with doing something wrong that didn't have immediate consequences.
Stop it. Settle down, take a breath.
Shutting down the computer, she left her room and came into the kitchen. Chris was setting his lunch tote on the counter. He looked hot, tired and sweaty, as he usually did after a full day. He had a dirty bandage wrapped around his arm--also not unusual, since he often came home with scrapes. She went right to him, winding her arms around his neck and pressing her body insistently against him as she rose on her tiptoes to bring her lips to his.
He looked a little startled, but then he figured out the same thing she had in the time it took her to get from her room to the kitchen. They could do this now, greet each other as lovers did at the end of the workday. He cradled her head in one big hand and deepened the kiss, pressing her against the counter. She curved her leg over his hip, willing him to put her up on the counter, press himself between her legs, relieve her all-over throbbing, but instead he moved her back, lips tugging in a smile.
"I'm filthy. I'll get you all dirty."
She so didn't care, but she forced herself to go back to her heels. "What happened to your arm?"
Chris rolled his eyes. "New guy on the crew. Don was swiping at a bee with his clippers and took a nice chunk out of my arm. Idiot. Think he'll work out okay, though, if he doesn't manage to kill us all first."
"Did you--"
"Yes, Nurse Nancy, I disinfected it and kept it clean. All's good. I'm going to go hit the showers. Geoff's on his way home--on time, for once. He's going to pick up some salads and fish sandwiches from Whole Foods. Pretty cool about the Bat Cave thing, right?"
"Yeah." She trailed him to the bathroom and watched him strip off the shirt. He hesitated when she was in the door.
"Oh, sorry." She started to move away, but he shook his head, offering her a half smile with enough lazy promise to uncurl warmth in her stomach.
"No, you're welcome to stay. Just getting used to it, you know. In a good way."
He stripped off his clothes, leaned in and started the shower. Her gaze
slid down his back and over his bare haunches, but when he began to unwrap the bandage, she came forward and took over. She told herself to focus on his arm, not the tempting weight of his genitals, so close she could brush her thighs against them.
She grimaced. "Chunk is right. This is going to leave a scar."
"Won't be my first." He kissed her cheek, reached into the shower and flicked water at her, making her draw back with a mock scowl before he stepped in and closed the shower door.
His cock had started to rise at her proximity, she noted, and wondered if that was why he'd so quickly moved under the spray. Chris had agreed to Geoff's mandate about no sexual activity for the next several days. Yet Chris was aroused by her presence, so why shouldn't they take advantage of that? If she slipped into the shower, he wouldn't deny her, would he? She fingered the hem of her shirt. All she had to do was strip it off, after all . . .
Chris spoke, his deep voice echoing off the tile amid the rush of water. "Geoff said to have you make up some of your famous lemonade to go with the fish. Mr. High and Mighty said you'd better have it ready when he gets home, or else."
She did like those masterful ultimatums, though she knew when her chain was being jerked. "I can see this whole Dom thing is going to his head."
"Yeah, I could have warned you about that. If you spit in his lemonade, I won't blame you. Just set mine apart before you do it."
She would have happily sat there and watched Chris run his capable hands over every inch of his powerful body, including all the tempting crevices, but she reluctantly left him to do as bidden. She was pretty sure she wasn't going to stay outside the shower if she remained another minute. Besides, Chris was studiously not looking at her, making it clear she was a temptation he had to avoid. It irritated her a little bit.
She needed to lighten up; she knew that. As she fixed the lemonade, she turned on her iPod and did a little disco improv around the kitchen to the Bee Gees classic "Staying Alive." Fortunately, it did lift her mood. Putting the pitcher in the fridge, she saw Geoff pull into the driveway, and those good feelings spiked further. She watched him get out and head up the walkway, handsome and serious in his suit.
As he entered the kitchen, she had the lemonade in a glass and was posed provocatively with it, like she'd done for Chris. Only today, instead of being naked, she had her T-shirt tied up under her breasts, baring her midriff and highlighting her breasts. When she was squarely in his sights, she shook down her hair in a practiced move she'd perfected in high school. She hadn't used the move since well before Anthony, the stalker ex-boyfriend Chris and Geoff had helped her banish into her past once and for all.
"Your lemonade as ordered, Master," she purred.
Geoff wasn't a 24/7-type Dom, any more than she intended to become their domestic servant, but he'd probably do things like this to tease or remind her of those moments when it would be about that. She was good with that, and teasing him back.
Geoff's lips curved, but the playful note she'd intended came out as mocking challenge, and he detected it. As her mother had said, he was sharp. A trace of puzzlement filtered through his expression. She set aside the lemonade to come to him, wanting to give him the same hello kiss she'd given Chris.
True to his nature, Geoff was even more demanding about it, setting down his briefcase and wrapping his arm around her, bringing her up on her toes as he kissed her back, scoring her bottom lip sharply.
His five-o'clock shadow was less coarse than Chris's, something she'd noticed before, but this hyperawareness of every difference, every sensation, was a delightful part of the change in their relationship. As she inhaled his aftershave, a contrast to Chris's earthy sweat, she thought she might be one of the luckiest women in the world, having the opportunity to indulge herself in those pleasurable variances with no restraint. She should have no complaints, no issues.
"Smartass," Geoff muttered, referencing her lemonade pose. He drew back and gave her a closer inspection. "Good day at work?"
"An even better end to it," she said. She'd push past this. No reason they needed to deal with her weirdly vacillating moods. "You have the food? I can get it set up if you want to change. Chris is showering."
"Sure. That'd be great." But he gave her one last penetrating look before he went down the hall.
She threw herself into the routine they all knew. Fortunately, things did level out for the next couple of hours. Maybe just having them close was all she needed. There was a lovely, different cadence to their three-way bond now, exercised in ways large and small. Lingering touches, easy affection, intimate teasing.
Geoff was looking out for all of them, right? Emotional recuperation was important. Time to breathe and think. Plus, him and Chris making the mature decision that it wouldn't be 24/7 sex should make her feel even better about her earlier thoughts. This was how a normal relationship worked. Quiet times, companionship, mixed with intimacy. Friendship. And the really hot sex. Right here at her fingertips, if she could force the issue.
She had that thought as Chris was loading the dishwasher and Geoff was settling down with his work. Her phrasing, the use of the word "force", gave her a start. Why was she trying to challenge Geoff? What was the problem, damn it?
If she could have some kind of physical release, maybe she could settle down. She just needed to feel a little more in control of what was happening inside her. Though she was eagerly embracing her submission, something was warring with it, saying that she needed to assert herself. Make sure there was a balance.
Or maybe it was the inner child poking out her lip and saying, He can't tell me what to do.
Shaking her head at herself, she left them to change into her pajamas. Pausing over her choices in the dresser drawer, she didn't pull out the flannels and comfortable oversized T-shirt she would have normally worn. The T-shirt was an extralarge freebie Geoff had given her some time ago after he'd run a half marathon for the animal shelter charity drive.
He'd chastised her about wearing provocative outfits in front of them, but that was before they'd all been sexually intimate. Now they could act on it if they wanted to do so, right? It was fine for Geoff to act as Dom, but they hadn't agreed he could impose things on her full-time. Okay, yeah, some things, sort of. But this was still a willing thing, and ultimately they were equal partners. She could change the rules if she wanted to do so.
She withdrew a baby tee and coupled it with gray jersey shorts she donned over a hot pink pair of panties with a high Brazilian cut. The light pink T-shirt was thin, showing off the shape of her nipples. When she was curled on her hip in her favorite reading chair, the shorts would ride up the curve of her ass. Just enough to make them a little bit crazy, which seemed quid pro quo, since she was all crazy at this point.
Don't do this, Sam.
Why not?
Her mind couldn't give her the right answer. Her gaze fell on the Naughty Bits envelope she'd pulled out of the mail, and she seized the distraction it offered. Coming back into the living room holding it, she pasted a smile on her face, trying to pretend she had on nothing out of the ordinary. Their new intimacy was simply making her comfortable wearing less around them. It wasn't like she was doing it as a deliberate provocation.
Which she was.
Chris was stretched out on the floor, his feet up on the arm of her reading chair. Geoff was on the couch reading through something work-related while Chris channel surfed.
"Hey, look what we got in the mail." She waved the invitation. Her cheeks were flushed, so she kept her head down as she spoke. "Madison is doing a benefit for an erotica theater she's planning."
She placed the brochure on the coffee table where they could both see it. "She's calling it Carnival in the Round. It'll be in that old theater in downtown Matthews. There'll be performances with whip play, wax, all sorts of things. Says it's a fetish costume thing, so we can dress up however we want. Or not at all, but I think I'd like to, even if you two don't. There will be changing areas at the theater if nee
ded. What do you think?"
She was talking in a rush of words, so she made herself shut up and backed into her reading chair, sinking down in it and curling her legs up beneath her. She dared to give Chris's bare feet propped there a quick caress, then she drew a steadying breath and raised her gaze.
She realized immediately she should have looked at Chris first. She met Geoff's cool hazel eyes, inscrutable as a sphinx's. Her cheeks flushed anew. "Hmm," he said. His gaze swept her, then Geoff put his feet down from the coffee table with a decided thump. She jumped, but he merely leaned forward to pick up the invitation. She looked toward Chris, trying a casual smile. He was trying to look anywhere but where it was obvious he wanted to look, at her scantily clad body, so he turned his attention to the invite when Geoff handed it to him. After Chris set it on the coffee table, the two men exchanged a glance.
"I think it's time to give her the gifts we set aside for her birthday," Geoff said. "One in particular."
Chris's mouth tightened as if he was undecided about that, but when he glanced her way at last, his gaze latched on to her trembling breasts and bare legs. For some reason, when her nervous gaze slid back to Geoff, she felt exposed in the wrong way.
"I think you may be right," Chris said at last.
"My birthday isn't for another month," she said. "And we're supposed to buy only small things. We agreed."
"Well, in this case there was an exception clause to that agreement, supported by two of the three signing members." Geoff gave her a trace of his normal smile, which made her feel easier and, oddly, a little ashamed. She crossed her arms over her breasts. Not trying to hide them. Not exactly.
"I wasn't aware the agreement was based on popular vote," she said.
Chris took one of her hands, pulling it away from her body. "This one time it is. You know you never have to buy me anything for my birthday, anyway. Just make one of those white layer cakes with the powdered sugar on it."