by Amy Muscat
“Oh sweetie, come here,” she said but now it was her pulling me in for a comforting hug.
Silently crying I heard her sniffling too as I let the thought of what could have happened run through my head.
I thought of how Ivy could’ve woke up today and me not being there ‘cause creepy fucking Andrew. He might have killed me.
An “Oh god” slipped past my trembling lips and Lottie held me tighter, her arms slightly constricting, but it was comforting when she held me to her. So different from the hold that Andrew had on me last night.
“Shh...Shh, Pey that fucker, can’t hurt you now, you’re safe. You’re safe.” She was rocking us slowly side to side, and the swaying motion and her reassuring words calmed me down, so I pulled away and dried my tears and took a shuddering breath.
After a couple attempts, I calmed and pulled away from her and told her thanks.
“For what?”
“For always being there for me. For always being there for Ivy, and for just being my friend.”
“No. Thank you for being my friend Peyton. You and Ivy have turned my life upside down for the better, in the last four years. You really have. I love you girly.”
“Ditto,” I gave her one last hug before pulling away again and told her, “right no more crying, from the both of us, or Ivy’s gonna come in here and start wondering why.”
Nodding, she wiped her face of any wetness that was left on it.
“Sooo... I got up early this morning and there was no one sleeping on the sofa, care to explain that?”
Groaning I told how the doctor said I had a mild concussion and needed to be woken every couple of hours, and when Keller had come in to wake me I’d asked him if he was gonna do this again and when he’d said yes, I made him get in bed with me.
“Beside the couch was too small for him and it was probably uncomfortable,” I told her shrugging.
She was pulling a face at me when she said, “Pey I don’t want you to get hurt by him again, I don’t mean to sound like a bitch, but I’m just worried about you that’s all. You understand that don’t you?”
I did.
“I do, I really do. I know you’re just looking out for me and I appreciate that Lotts. But Keller has the right to see and know his child. So to me, this should be about Ivy knowing her dad. And I’m not gonna let him hurt me again, I promise you.”
“Well, if he does, he’ll have ME to deal with, and it won’t be pretty,” she said, mock punching the air.
Shaking my head at her, I said okay and that I’d warn him before walking back to my room and started getting ready, dressing up warm as it was colder out today than usual.
A couple minutes later Ivy came running in wearing a pair of jeans, her pink rain boots and a thick pink sweater and holding the hairbrush out to me.
“Turn around then,” I told her making a spinning gesture with my finger.
She spun and told me she wanted two pigtails.
Giving me a whirl she asked me, “do you think daddy would like my hair like this, momma?”
“He sure will baby, you look beautiful,” I spoke honestly, she was always beautiful.
“Otay, thanks momma. How long is he gonna be?” So impatient.
“I don’t know, about five/ten minutes. Why don’t you go brush your teeth, ‘cause I know you haven’t yet,” I told her giving her a look.
“Otay.”
Smiling as she walked off I grabbed my bag off the floor checking that all the stuff that I need was in there. Walking in the living room, I saw Lottie sitting on the couch and joined her. She looked somewhat better, her hair was damp so she must of showered, but she’d stuck new pajamas on, so I didn’t think she’s going out anywhere to soon.
“What you doing today, bumming it?”
Laughing she said, “Yeah man, I can’t be arsed to do anything today, we still doing movies today after you come back from the park?”
“Erm... I don’t know. I’m sure that Keller will wanna spend more time together with Ivy. I don’t know if he needs to be somewhere.” I told her shrugging.
“Well, it's bloody cold out there and it’s only meant to get colder, so if you don’t end up staying at the park for long, and Keller’s not doing anything, I don’t mind if he comes back and joins us. For Ivy’s sake, I’ll suck it up.”
“Thanks Lotts, I appreciate that, and I know Ivy would love for him to come back here. I know you don’t like him and I understand why, but I really and truly believe that he knew nothing. He’s a really nice guy, Lotts and I know how long it takes you to trust someone, but give him a chance, I am.” I said looking at her pleadingly.
She hesitantly said okay.
Just as I was about to thank her, there was a knock on the door and Ivy came running out from the bathroom and called out “who is it?” before opening the door.
Keller’s big frame filled the doorway and he looked smoking hot with his dark blue jeans and black boots, with the laces loosely done up, a navy blue thick coat, and his head was covered over by a black beanie. He looked flushed from the cold.
He looked completely fuckable.
No Peyton, stop thinking these things.
“Fuck me,” sighed Lottie, speaking my thoughts.
We watched as Keller smiled at Ivy and bent down to her level and handed her something. A princess doll.
It was the newest one out, and I was gonna get it for her, for her birthday next week.
“Thanks daddy!” She said gasping and wrapping her arms around his neck. He put his arms around her tiny waist, picked her up and in a happy voice said, “You’re welcome. A princess for a princess.”
He looked over to me, smiled and winked.
“Oh god, I think I just came,” Lottie said breathlessly.
Turning my head gapping at her.
“Lottie,” I hissed.
“What? I may not like him, but fuck me, he’s one fucking sexy man,” she whispered to me.
“Shut up, Lotts, he might hear you!” I whisper yelled at her.
Her eyes turned back and she said “bloody hell,” and I turned to see what she was looking at now and saw Keller bent over and putting Ivy back on the ground, and he was giving us a great view of his ass.
“That’s one, tight, sexy arse he’s got there,” Lottie was still whispering to me.
“Yeah, it is,” I sounded just as breathless as she did.
“You ready, Pey?” Keller said snapping me out of my thoughts, where my fingers were digging into them bare cheeks.
I flushed. Thank god that he couldn’t read minds.
“Yeah," My voice cracking slightly, so I cleared it and walked over and put my red thick pea coat on, noticing Ivy already had hers on along with her hat and scarf and gloves.
“I’ll see you later Lotts,” I called out to her.
“Bye aunty Lottie!”
“Bye munchkin, bye guys.” Well, at least she included Keller in her goodbye.
“See you, Charlotte,” Keller said, waving a hand at her.
Wincing as he called her, her formal name, I looked over and saw her giving him a dirty look.
I hurried them out the door and waved at Lottie, who was still pulling a face.
“What was that look for? I only said bye.”
“Yeah... she doesn't like being called Charlotte.”
“Well, I didn’t know that. Could have given me a heads up there Pey,” he said, nudging me with his shoulder.
“Sorry.”
“How’s your back and head?” His hand coming up and gently rubbing the back of my head.
“Its okay, hurts a little, but I’ve taken some medicine and the ache is gone down, but it’s my back that hurts the most.”
“I’ll put some cream on it later if you want?” The images that popped in my head over that statement were all R-rated.
Clearing my throat, I told him that would be great.
It took us about 15 minutes to walk to the park. Ivy was in-between us swinging our hands that were clas
She hadn’t stopped smiling the whole way and my heart warmed.
When we got to the children’s play area, I told Ivy to go play.
“But I wanted daddy to push me on the swings, momma,” she said pouting.
“Daddy will push you in a minute baby, okay?”
“Otay, come push me in a minute daddy!”
“Okay princess, I just gotta talk to your momma and then I’ll be there,” he said nodding at her to go play.
Nodding back she ran off over to the slides.
“She’s so beautiful Pey, and not just how she looks. Her personality is perfect too. I’m really proud of you, and you should be proud of yourself too. You brought her up all on your own? Or did your mom and dad help? Fuck, what do they think of me?”
“Well, firstly I am proud of Ivy. Very proud. She’s my world, Keller. My whole fucking world and I’d do anything for her, even strip. ‘Cause it paid for the food she ate and the clothes on her back. I hate doing that, but what else was I meant to do? Go back and live with my parents? No, I wasn’t gonna do that.
And what my parents thought of you? Well... let’s just say it was a good thing that you were halfway around the world.” I told him.
My dad wanted to kill him and I honestly think he might of. If Keller had been closer and my mom and I hadn’t calmed him down. My mom didn’t believe it for a long time. Nor had I, I had kept waiting for him to come home and tell me that it had been a mistake, but after the first year of me giving birth and no Keller, reality had set in and I knew that it had been true and Keller really wasn’t coming back.
Keller visibly winced. He was probably imagining my dad running after him with an aluminum bat ready to the beat the shit out of him.
“Shit that don’t sound too good. So how do you think they are gonna react when they know I’m back?”
“I don’t know Kel, maybe it’ll be better if I told them over the phone first. I don’t want my dad to blow up again.” I told him.
“How did they take it when you told them you were pregnant?” The curiosity in his voice was unmissable.
“Well, it wasn’t pretty, especially when I told them about you. I was so scared to tell them, like I was shitting myself. And the day I was gonna tell them, my mom found me bent over the toilet throwing my breakfast up, and when I looked up at her, it clicked. She just bent down pulled my hair back from my face and told me it was all gonna be alright. I broke down and told her everything. So she listened and held me and told me comforting words and even though I could see she was upset and disappointed that I wouldn’t be going college anytime soon, she understood that I could never get rid of my baby. She helped me throughout the whole pregnancy. And when I told my dad. That wasn’t a pleasant time, but he accepted it and he loves Ivy. They both do.” I was getting upset telling him this, ‘cause it was both one the best experiences of my life, but it was also the worst.
All them times when I was sick and needed Keller there to hold my hair back, rub my back or just sit there and comfort me.
Or the time when I first felt Ivy kick. It had been a magical moment for me, feeling my unborn baby moving around in my belly.
It was when I went into labor that I needed Keller the most.
That had been one of the most-scary experiences I’d ever gone through, and though I had my mom there with me holding my hand, I wanted it to be Keller’s hand that I was squeezing to death.
I felt his thumb wipe under my eye and while the side of his palm cleared away the tear that dripped down my cheek.
Sniffing, I apologized again for my tears.
“Don’t be sorry Pey. I’m sorry for not being there and I swear to you, I WILL find out who did this to us. That’s a promise Pey. Whoever it was, is a sick fucker with no life and likes messing around with other peoples.” He was angry. His fists were clenched so tightly, his knuckles were white as a bone. It was only when Ivy came running over that he calmed down.
“Daddy, can you push me now?” Her face was flushed from the cold.
“Yeah, coming,” He said getting up and walking over to where Ivy was waiting for him. He swung her up in his arms and I could hear giggles from where I sat on the bench.
I watched as Keller gently deposited Ivy into the swing and then stood in front of her before he started to push her.
“Higher daddy!” Her laughing voice shouted.
“Okay, princess.”
The moment was so perfect that I got my cell out and took pictures of them together like that.
10 minutes later I decided that it was getting too cold now and told them that we should head back. Ivy pouted, but once I told her that we could go get some hot chocolate she perked right back up.
“You wanna come Kel?” I didn’t want him to think that I was gonna make him come along with us if he had other things to go and do.
“Yeah, sure I would love to have a hot chocolate with you girls,” he said picking Ivy up and putting her on his hip before he wrapped an arm around my lower back and pulled me closer to him.
“Keller, what are you doing?” I whispered to him. I didn’t want Ivy to hear. He was making my body feel things that I haven’t felt for so long now, it was giving me a head rush at just the thought of him touching any part of me.
“Nothing. It’s cold Peyton. I was just trying to keep you warm,” he looked and sounded innocent, but I knew Keller, and I knew he was up to something.
I gave him a look, and he chuckled but didn’t say anything more, but just carried on walking out of the park.
TWELVE
We were sitting in a coffee shop that was around the corner from the park, waiting in a booth while Keller went and got our hot drinks.
I looked over to Ivy and saw her looking in the direction that Keller was in.
“Did you enjoy the park baby?” I asked her.
She turned her head back towards me and with her eyes shining she told me, “Yeah momma, I had lots of fun. I’m happy that daddy’s back, I missed him lots. Did you miss him lots momma?” She asked me tilting her head to the side, looking me in the eye awaiting my answer.
“Yeah baby, I missed him lots and lots.”
It was the truth. I had missed Keller. It was just that after a while, I started to hate him, and that took away a lot of the missing him part.
Nodding at me like she knew, she looked back over and a big smile appeared on her face seconds before Keller’s handsome face came into view.
“Hey, here’s the drinks, and I got us some muffins too,” he said sliding into the booth with the tray filled with three hot chocolates with cream and three big muffins.
“Mmm...” Ivy said before picking up one of the muffins and shoving the top part in her mouth.
I shook my head at her, it was like she had never eaten before.
I swear that girl could eat everything, and still be hungry.
I looked over at Keller and saw he was doing the exact same thing.
Wow, like father, like daughter.
I picked mine up and started eating it. Slowly.
“So Kel, are you working?” I asked him, wondering what he was doing with himself.
“I’m head of my dad’s security company, here in New York actually. I started about two months ago, after I got out of the hospital.”
“Why were you in the hospital daddy?”
“Erm, because I got hurt princess, and I had to be in the hospital for a while, before I could leave. But I’m fine now baby, no need to worry, okay?” He told Ivy, before looking over to me to gauge my reaction.
My hand was covering my mouth, and my eyes started watering at the thought off Keller lying in a hospital bed bleeding all by himself.
“I’ll tell you later” His lips said to me.
“Okay,” I silently told him.
We went back to eating our muffins and drinking our hot chocolate’s and talking with Ivy. Or rather Ivy telling Keller everything she deemed he needed to know about- which was everything apparently- and when we finished we put our winter coats on and walked ten minutes back to our house.
****
“We’re home, Lotts!” I called out when we walked through the front door.
“I’m in the front room!”
We all hung our coats up and went into the living room.
The first thing I saw was Lottie standing on one of the kitchen chairs changing the light bulb. The next was that the whole room had been changed around, our brown couch was on the other side of the room, our TV was moved, the coffee table and rug, everything was moved.
“Lotts, you been busy?”
She climbed down from the chair and spun around saying, “Yeah I was bored and had lots of shi-stuff going on in my head so to keep me busy I rearranged the furniture.” She shrugged.
I knew what was going on in her head, and I felt bad. She was obviously thinking of last night.
I nodded at her but didn’t say anymore on the subject, because I understood her. I think if I weren’t preoccupying my thoughts, I’d be doing the same thing.
“Okay, so we went to the store on the way back and got everything for today,” I told her and looked over to see Keller shake the bags at her.
“You got the goodies?” At my nod, she smiled and said, “Great! Well, go put them in the kitchen, and I’ll sort them out. You go put some pj’s on Ivy. You too Pey, are you staying Keller?” She said all in one breathe.
“Yeah... I- is that alright, Lottie?” He sounded hesitant, but at least he called her Lottie.
“Yeah, it’s fine,” she said to him, with a very small smile. It was a start.
“Thanks,” he said smiling back at her.
As Keller took the bags to the kitchen, I said thanks to Lottie, smiling gratefully at her.
She gave me a big smile and said, “Yeah well, I gotta do it for Ivy’s sake don’t I?”
“Yeah, you know to her you’re the best aunty she could ask for right?”
Snorting she said, “I’m her only aunt, but yeah I know Pey.”
“Right now fudge off and get changed, while I set things up, and then I’m gonna interrogate your man.”
“Don’t say nothing to him Lotts, I mean it. And he’s not my man.”
“Fine, fine. I won’t say nothing to him.” She got a twinkle in her eye telling me that she was up to something. Plus her left eye twitched, and that only happens when she lies.
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