by Vi Lily
Pretty sure if a duck had my brains, he’d fly north for the winter.
“So, you just ate whatever didn’t eat you first?” I laugh. His lips twitch again, even more this time.
“Well, Mister Yap Flapper, I just realized how rude I’m being.” I wipe my hands on my skirt, thanks to not having a napkin. I stick my hand out over our food.
“I’m Chloe Sawyer, new Afterlife Academy student.”
Toru stares at my hand for long seconds. I just hold it there, waiting. I’ll hold my damned hand out all night if I have to.
Did I mention I’m stubborn?
Finally, he wipes his hands on his pants and then slowly wraps his huge hand around mine. He’s so gentle and careful that it makes my heart ache. I notice that, like his face, his hands are scarred.
Poor baby has been through a lot.
“Toru Makio,” he grunts and then releases my hand like it’s diseased. He even wipes his hand on his pants again.
I don’t get my panties ruffled over it. Not that I’m wearing any. And that reminds me that I need to find the Commissary.
“Nice to meet you, Toru. And I believe I owe you a drink,” I say with a grin. He gives me a little frown in return, which makes his face even scarier looking. I stand and half turn toward the food counter. There still isn’t anyone there.
“Does no one work in this place?” I ask the room in general and then jump when Toru passes me. I didn’t even hear him get up from the table.
I follow, even though he didn’t tell me to. When he gets to the counter, he places his huge hand on the flat surface and it blinks and lights up.
“Large orange soda, no ice and…” he turns to look down at me.
“Vanilla shake,” I grin. In just seconds, there’s a whirring sort of sound as a metal door opens to our right in what looks like a cooler. Two tall cups slide out on a tray, and then the tray slides back into the magic cabinet the door closes.
Toru reaches over my head — no difficulty there, considering the top of my head doesn’t even come close to reaching his pit — and he nabs the cups. Without a word, he turns and heads back to the table. I trot along behind him.
Surprisingly, he waits until I sit, then he gently places my shake in front of me before sitting in his chair. I notice that the thing creaks as he does. And it’s made of metal. Good Lord, this guy is humongous!
My shake comes with a fat straw, which is awesome and I take a big draw. It is the most delicious shake I’ve ever had and without thinking, I immediately I suck down half the shake. Pain crashes into my head like a freight train.
“Argggh!” Dammit, apparently brain freeze is still a thing in the new body. I slam my cup on the table and put my fingertips to my temples.
“Here,” Toru says as he gently pushes my hands away and starts rubbing my head. Like my whole freaking head. And I thought Gio’s hands were big. Toru, Gio and Samuel all tower over me too.
I’m starting to think I’m like the lone tater tot in a batch of baked potatoes and I wonder if all the guys in the afterlife are tall. But then I remember with relief that Ali wasn’t that tall and Sal was barely taller than me. I really hate being the smallest, which has been a thing all my life.
“Not drink so fast,” he murmurs as he continues gently rubbing. I wonder if English isn’t his first language, or if it’s difficult for him to speak.
His hands are so warm and surprisingly soft and the pain starts easing almost immediately. I close my eyes as I sigh in relief. This is the best I’ve felt all day.
In just seconds, the pain disappears almost completely, but Toru’s massage is freaking amazing. I don’t want him to stop, but I can tell that he’s about to, so I open my eyes and place my hands over his, holding them to my head.
“Thank you,” I murmur with a smile. “You’re being nicer to me than anyone else has.”
I’m not counting Gio, because I’m pretty sure he has a selfish agenda — meaning, getting laid — but Toru is being nice to me just to help me. I can tell that he isn’t expecting anything in return.
Once again, he looks shocked. A frown creases his heavy brow. “Why you no scared me?” he asks with a tilt to his head, like he’s trying to figure me out.
Good luck with that, buddy.
I remove my hands which causes him to release my head and sit back. I’m instantly sorry for the loss, which is really super weird. I mean, earlier in the day I wanted to make friends with the guy, but I definitely wasn’t having any touchy-feely ideas about him.
Like I said, he’s really scary-looking. But he’s sweet as pecan pie.
I tilt my head at Toru like he did to me. “What do you mean?” I ask, even though I know exactly what he means. I don’t want him thinking that I find him repulsive. Cuz for one thing, I don’t. Yeah, he’s not in danger of winning any beauty contests, not even at the dog show, but it’s damned easy to look past the face and see him.
And so far, I really like what I see.
A scowl comes over him and he looks down at his forgotten cake. “People… avoid,” he admits. “Think scary.”
“Oh,” I say like that’s a revelation or something. I hope I’m a better actress than I think I am. “Why is that? Are you scary?”
Startled black eyes shoot back up to meet mine. I keep my head tilted and hope I have a questioning look on my face. He frowns briefly, then gives his head a little shake.
“Big. Ugly,” he grunts and looks away again as he takes a drink of his soda. I hate that he thinks this of himself — or knows it rather. I reach out and put my hand over his. I can practically see his skin jump at the contact as his eyes fly to mine again.
I smile sweetly. “All I see is a sweet new friend who happens to be a very large male. And I, for one, love big guys.” I wink at him while he just blinks at me a few times before his eyes slide away.
Poor guy is never going to figure me out.
I pat his hand, then lean back and pick up my burger. I’ve barely eaten a few bites thanks to talking, so I eat while he finishes his cake. He then neatly stacks his plates and silverware, then dusts off the table into his hand and drops the crumbs onto the top plate.
Wow. He’s tidy too. And not an arrogant jerk. I can honestly say I’ve never met a guy like him. I voice it out loud and he snorts while darting his eyes at me.
“You never see man dog?” he growls with derision. Any sane person would be scrambling to get away, but I can tell he’s growly as a defensive reaction.
This poor man has worse self-esteem than me. I roll my eyes at him. “No, I meant I’ve never met a guy who is so sweet and bothers cleaning up after himself.”
He once again seems surprised that I’m not reacting like most people would. He stares at me for a split second, then shrugs his massive shoulders.
“Be respectful,” he murmurs. “No reason not be nice human, even if only half.”
I decide right then and there that I’m making Toru my project. I’m gonna help him see that he’s not what he thinks he is, or what others might see. He’s so much more.
I offer him some of my fries and he carefully takes one with his finger and thumb. I want to laugh; it’s quite a trick since one of his fingers is like three of mine. But he’s very delicate and deliberate.
“Take a handful,” I laugh. “I’m not going to eat them.” I watch as he takes a few more, then sucks them into his mouth one at a time, chewing slowly. He’s very graceful for such a humongous man.
I take a few more bites of my burger, then offer the rest to him. He takes it from me and his fingers brush the back of my hand, they’re so long. I take his free hand then, which he allows while watching me with slight suspicion.
I match my hand to his and laugh. “Look,” I tell him, “my whole hand fits in your palm, with room to spare!” I think it’s funny, but Toru pulls his hand away and puts it in his lap as he looks away. It’s obvious he’s embarrassed by his size.
My eyes travel over his ridiculously broad shoulders a
nd his arms that look like tree trunks. His biceps are seriously testing the stitching on his tee shirt that’s so big I think I could use it to make a tent fort. I want to sigh; I have always adored big, muscular men.
Hello, my name is Chloe and I’m buff-aholic.
“Do you have to eat a lot to keep up with all these beautiful muscles?” I ask as I run my fingertips over his forearm, propping my chin up in my other hand.
It’s a totally flirtatious move, and I’m not really sure where I’m going with this. All I know is I want Toru to feel good about himself and if a semi-attractive girl pays him attention, maybe it will help.
His black eyes flash to mine and I want to laugh as his cheeks redden. “Eat lots,” he admits with another shrug. He looks sheepishly at his stack of plates and bowls. I count three large plates, two small and four bowls.
“And do you usually eat this late?” I lean back and take a sip of my shake, careful to take a small sip, although a part of me wants to gulp it in order to cause another brain freeze. It would be totally worth it to get Toru’s hands on me again.
Whoa. Where the hell did that come from? I swear, Ali must have given me extra hormones or something when he reanimated me. I’ve been a horny toad all day today.
His shoulders hike up once more. He won’t really look at me now that I’m asking him questions. I get the impression that Toru is very shy and doesn’t like attention.
Too bad for him that I’m planning on showering him with attention.
“Easier,” he finally mutters. I cock my head to the side.
“Easier? Like, there aren’t any lines or whatever?”
His cheeks redden further, and he shakes his head slightly. “No one stare,” he practically whispers, eyes glued to the table.
Oh. Ow. That makes my heart hurt for him and I just want to wrap him up in a big ol’ hug. Of course, that would be kind of awkward since we just met like twenty minutes ago, but I can’t help but feel like I have to touch him. It’s a need for some reason.
His hands are clasped on his lap, so I lean over and put my hand on his shoulder.
“How about we eat together from now on?” I suggest, and I really hope he doesn’t turn my offer down. I realize that spending time with this gentle giant is something I truly want to do.
“I could use the company and all. I hate being the new girl.”
Toru glances at me and makes a non-committal sound with another shoulder movement that’s more of a twitch than it is a shrug. I’ll take that as a “yes.”
“Well, now that that’s settled,” I drawl with a grin, “I sure could use your help.” His dark eyes shoot back up to mine and narrow slightly. I think he’s assuming I’m faking a friendship so I can use him for something.
“I just got here today, and everything is so confusing,” I tell him with probably more “bimbo” in my voice than necessary. Like I’m too stupid to figure stuff out and need the big, strong man to take care of me. As if. Well, sort of. But I kinda want Toru to think that I do. I think he needs a… purpose, I guess. Someone to rely on him. Trust him.
I’m the gal for the job.
“I sure would appreciate it if you could explain how things work.” I wave back toward the food counter. “Like getting the drinks and all. Oh, and I have no idea where the Commissary is. I need to get some clothes. All I have is my school uniform.” I motion at my clothes and his eyes follow, traveling down my body. I can almost feel the heat from his stare, and I wonder if he can tell I’m not wearing a bra or panties.
I squirm a little in my seat, feeling very naughty all of a sudden.
Toru’s eyes finally meet mine and he frowns. “Your Reaper was supposed tell you,” he says. His eyes slide down over my clothes again.
“What school you in?”
“Reaper,” I tell him and if I thought he’d had a shocked look before, I was wrong, cuz now he looks shocked.
“Azrael know?” he asks. I can’t help but wonder at the concern in his voice.
I frown. “I don’t know. I think so. Samuel was supposed to talk to him after he dumped me off with Sal. Why? Who is this Azrael and why is it such a big deal for me to be in the Reaper School?”
Toru shakes his head a little and looks away. I think he mutters something about a “death sentence,” but I can’t be sure. His eyes take on a vacant look for a moment, like he’s reliving memories. I sip my shake and wait.
His frown deepens as he glances back at me. “Azrael, Angel of Death,” he says with hesitation. “First Reaper. He not… he not nice. Not cross him.”
I tilt my head again. “Why would I cross him just cuz I’m in the Reaper School?”
Toru frowns and then runs his huge hands over his face. “You female,” he sighs. “Never female Reaper.”
“Well, if there’s never been one, then why is everyone assuming he’s gonna hate me? Maybe he’ll be happy to have a gal in the ranks. Shake things up. Hell, I might even introduce pink robes,” I say cheekily, with a big grin.
Toru’s lips twitch as he glances at me and he damn near almost smiles. Almost. Then the darkness comes over him again and he shakes his head.
“Wish you change schools,” he says. “This not good.”
I shrug. “Well, I was always taught to make the best of every situation. When life hands you stale tortillas, make tacos.” At least, that’s what I think I was taught… by someone I can’t remember.
The corner of Toru’s mouth lifts. I decide to change the subject. I don’t want to dwell on this judgey Azrael who’s never even met me. He should at least wait to meet me before deciding I’m a pain in the ass.
That’s what everyone else does.
“So, do you think you could take me to the Commissary when they’re open?” I ask. Toru’s head tilts. With his features, it really is a canine look for him. It kinda makes me want to scratch behind his ears.
“Samuel your Reaper?” he asks instead of answering me. I nod, wondering how he knew that, but then I remember I just mentioned him dumping me off with Sal.
Confusion covers his face. “Should have tell you where, how. Reaper’s job.”
I ignore the pang that makes me question if I’m being a bother and Toru doesn’t want to help me. It’s a familiar feeling, I realize, one I remember from the old life — of being told I’m a pest.
Unwanted.
I shrug it off. I get the idea that if Toru doesn’t want to do something, Toru doesn’t do it.
For some stupid reason, I feel the need to defend Samuel. “Well, there was the fact that he was against me joining the school too, I think cuz he knew Azrael was gonna get his tail tied in a knot. He seemed… preoccupied, when he dropped me off at Sal’s.”
And there’s also the tiny fact that I think we have a mutual attraction thing going.
Toru harrumphs, like he doesn’t agree that’s a good enough excuse. “Should take care of you,” he mumbles. “I would,” he admits while staring at his clasped hands.
Awww… seriously, can this guy get any sweeter? I’m getting cavities over here. I don’t mention what he admitted, though, cuz he seems embarrassed.
“Well, I guess I’ll just have to hunt him down tomorrow and have him do the orientation then,” I say, putting a bit too much sadness in my voice. “I don’t wanna be a bother to you.”
I might be laying it on a little too thick.
But it seems to work, because Toru looks up at me. “I help you.”
Chapter 8
T HE COMMISSARY doesn’t have “hours,” which is a good thing. Also, like almost everything else around here, I found out it’s completely automated.
Toru leads me down the quiet hallways and, unlike Speed Racer Sammy, he takes the time to point out “landmarks” so that I can find my way around.
“Swim,” he tells me as we pass a set of double doors. Everything is either wood or stone in this building, so it is hard to tell what’s what. I would expect glass doors to lead to a pool, but nooo.
�
�Why aren’t there any signs here?” I ask as we continue down the hall.
Toru makes a grunting sound, then walks up to a door and presses his hand against it while looking at me. Lighted letters instantly appear within the wood — which is freaking awesome, actually — that says “Fae Female Showers.”
“Touch doors. Tell you what is,” he says, still focused on me.
I smirk at him. “You wanna go in?” I tease as I nod at the door. He glances back, then jerks his hand off like it’s on fire. His cheeks redden again, and I have to say it’s super adorable to see such a monstrously huge guy blush. Especially with his looks.
“Come on,” I tell him as I slide my hand under his arm and tug slightly. He jumps at the contact, but I just loop my arm under his and then clasp my hands together, trapping his arm. My arms barely reach around his. My two arms… his one. Holy cow.
“This girl needs to go shopping.”
The Commissary is… weird. Part of it is set up like a department store, part of it like a sporting goods store and another like an electronics store. And, true to what Toru said, no one works in the place.
I wander around, looking at the different items. “So, you just take what you need? Just like that?” I ask as I pick up a camera-looking gadget that looks really expensive.
Toru grunts, which I now know means “yes.”
“Huh, that’s so strange. Like shoplifting without getting in trouble.” I frown then as another of those fleeting memory things trickles through my brain.
It was a summer day and I was young, like a tween maybe. The girls and I were at a mall and had gone into a boutique that had clothes none of us could afford on our limited allowances. Tabby wanted a sundress and was trying to talk the rest of us into chipping in so she could get it. We of course all told her to pound sand, which ticked her off.
We continued to look around the store for a bit, then Maddie suggested we get frozen yogurt. When we walked out of the door, alarms sounded and the next thing I knew, I was in the store office, being accused of stealing a sundress that had somehow found its way into my backpack. I wasn’t arrested since I was so young and it was my “first offense,” but I’d been banned from that mall for life.