by L. E. Thomas
“It’s too late. Shields are failing,” Bear said, his voice training. “I’m punching out.”
A smaller signal separated from the Trident image on the holographic board, Bear’s escape pod shooting off toward deep space. A second later, the Trident disappeared and left nothing else on the board. If Gan was able to eject in time, his transponder on the pod wasn’t working. But Austin knew better.
The Star Runners stood in silence, their eyes fixated on the space. The view shifted back to the Formidable.
“Alert fighters launched,” the Tower announced. Four Tridents emerged from the launch tubes. “Launching Kardas to begin rescue operations.”
“Show’s over,” Captain Talad announced as if they had just finished watching a sporting event. “You all have work to do. Get to it.”
The Star Runners slowly dispersed. Curly glanced at Austin, her head shaking. She held his gaze for a moment before leaving the room. Austin lingered at the edge of the holographic board for a long moment, watching the Kardas and Tridents head toward Bear’s escape pod and the debris field that used to be his friend Gan.
*****
Mom twisted and writhed in agony as the flames enveloped her, igniting her clothing in a lethal dance of fire and light. Burning embers floated and withered to ash as they hit the pine straw. Austin reached for her, his arms moving in slow motion. His feet wouldn’t move as if concrete encased them. He screamed for her, but the smoke filled his throat. Mom melted into the flames. The fire was igniting his legs. He rolled away from the inferno and into the darkness, the only place where there was safety.
But the ground disappeared beneath him. He fell through space and the scene changed to a rocky beachside cliff. He continued to fall. He could feel he was getting closer to the rocks below.
Closer. Oh God.
Closer. He was going to die.
Closer. This is it!
He jolted, droplets of sweat rolling down his forehead as he sat forward. The air left his lungs as he inhaled slowly and propped himself up on the bed in his quarters. It took a moment for the fires to dissipate from his mind. He rubbed at his face.
Glancing at the clock, he saw he’d managed three hours of sleep. Not bad—more hours than he had slept in one stretch for the past two weeks.
Smack.
He frowned. The noise came from the hatch to his quarters. Sliding off the cot, he shuffled over to the hatch. The floor was cold. He pulled the hatch back.
“Major Braddock?” He snapped to attention, blinking the sleep from his eyes.
“At ease, Lieutenant.” Braddock glanced at the sweat stains on Austin’s shirt. “Are you all right, son?”
Blood rushed to his face. “Yes, sir. Are you?”
“Something’s happened. Do you have a moment?”
Austin gestured behind him. “Please—come in.”
Braddock stepped into the quarters. His uniform looked wrinkled, unusual for the Major as if he had hadn’t taken it off for days. When Austin turned around after closing the hatch, Braddock appeared shorter and deflated.
“Something wrong, sir?” Austin asked.
“We lost two more Tridents while you were out,” Braddock said, exhaling. “Damnedest thing I’ve ever seen.”
Austin’s stomach twisted. “Who, sir?”
“Fish and Crusher of Tarnex.”
“How?” he asked, even though he knew the answer.
Braddock lowered his gaze. “Our new friend out there seems to know our patrol schedule.”
“Why do you say that, sir?”
“Crusher was new—started out about the same time you did but without the advanced … situations you have been through—and had been struggling with carrier life. Captain Lord had said he admired Fish, who was on his third tour.” He slid his hand down the side of his face. “Kid got scared when that Wraith showed up. Fish held his own, but the Wraith went right for the rookie. It was like he knew. Fish used up his shields trying to get in between Crusher and the Wraith, probably hoping he could give the kid an out.”
Braddock stared at the wall, his mind on the attack.
“I ain’t never seen a Trident take so much damage, but Fish kept the thing flying as long as he could.”
“You knew him, sir?”
Braddock swallowed. “I was on his first tour. I was a Lieutenant when he came onboard, but the whole ship talked about how talented the new guy was. You know he got his call sign because he fell in the water during one of his first days at the academy?”
“No, sir.”
“Yep. I heard the guy was looking at this girl jogging past and fell right in the campus fountain.” Braddock laughed and leaned up against the wall, but the smile faded slowly until the standard, hard-nosed expression returned. “Once Fish was gone, Crusher lost focus and, well, the rookie was taken out before our other patrols could get there. Whole thing was over in a minute.”
“Unbelievable,” Austin breathed.
“There’s no denying it now.”
“What’s that, sir?”
Braddock stared at him, his eyes cold. “Our systems were hacked when we contacted Ramelle. They know everything about our roster. It’s the only way this makes sense. They’re tracking our Star Runners’ movements.”
“What are we going to do, sir?”
Braddock’s expression softened. “We are going to need to make changes if we’re going to deal with this ship … some unorthodox tactics are being discussed. No other rookies have the combat experience you do, so your value on this tour has multiplied. I need to know you’re with me, Rock. That you’ll do what is needed when the time comes.
“We can’t let that ship be mass produced. If the Zahl Empire works out the kinks of that thing, well, we … we have to make sure they can’t make it.”
“Yes, sir.” Austin clenched his jaw, thinking of Gan. “I’ll do whatever I need to do. Gan was my friend.”
Braddock nodded. “He was a good pilot. Helped in the Battle of Atlantis. I had high hopes for him.”
“And Bear?”
Braddock made a clicking sound with his tongue. “He’s shaken up, but he’ll live. Probably be grounded for a while—at least till the doc says he’s flight ready.” He took a deep breath. “I should be going. I’ve had about enough of being target practice for this guy—think it’s time for a role reversal.”
“I agree, sir.”
“All right.” He smacked Austin’s shoulder so hard it nearly knocked him over. “See you soon.”
When Braddock left, his shoulder still burned.
Austin sat at his desk for a long moment, considering he might be better off going to the gym than trying to sleep again. His eyes lingered on the sheets damp with sweat, and he thought of his nightmare.
He booted his tablet and wrote letters to Mom, Josh and Nubern. Although the ship was currently on communication blackout, the messages would be saved and transmitted when the Commander believed it was safe.
He shuddered, thoughts of the Wraith spinning around his head.
Austin just hoped he would still be around when the messages were delivered.
Searching the Formidable’s Intranet, Austin made an appointment with the ship’s counselor.
“And that’s really it,” Austin Stone said, leaning back into the plush seat of the counselor’s room. “I don’t really know why I’m here, but I know need to sleep.”
The counselor, Lieutenant Krista Carpenter, sipped her coffee. She gently placed the mug down on the table in front of her and folded her arms over her chest. Austin had expected a large room complete with an oversized couch and a massive window overlooking the stars. Instead, the counselor’s room was no bigger than Austin’s quarters and contained two uncomfortable seats, a filing cabinet, and a glass table.
She had said very little when Austin entered, simply asking him in a kind voice to explain what he would like to discuss. As Austin carefully laid out his concerns, she had studied him and made no notes of any kind.
“I can supply you with a mild sedative to aid with sleep,” she said, nodding slowly. “It would be a very low dose that wouldn’t affect your ability to fly. You said the nightmares had been going on two months?”
“Yes,” Austin said, avoiding eye contact. “A little less than that. They started when I was on leave.”
She cocked her head to the side. “I have to be honest with you, Lieutenant, I looked at your file when you set up the appointment. The amount of action you have seen this early in your career is quite astounding. I think it would have an effect on anyone. Can you talk a little about that?”
Austin shrugged. “About what exactly?”
“Based on what you said, I’d like to hear your thoughts on the Battle of Atlantis—if you can talk about it.”
“Sure.”
Austin gazed at the wall, remembering the events of that day. Jonathan Nubern had led the lone defense of the port comprised of five total Tridents. Somehow, three Star Runners fell early in the contest as the swarm of Tyral Pirates concentrated their fire on them.
“I, uh, launched as ordered and began my attack,” Austin said slowly, his mind conjuring up the images of the battle. “The others fell quickly. I don’t know why. Nubern was shot down. And I survived.”
Carpenter observed him. “Go on.”
“There’s nothing to say. They died, so did Gan. And Bear almost died, too.” He tilted his head toward the floor. “I didn’t.”
“Do you think you should have?”
“Yes,” he said without delay. He locked eyes with her. “I’m not any better than any of those Star Runners. How did I survive and they didn’t?”
“We don’t always have the answers.”
Austin steepled his fingers, felt his knuckles pop. “It just doesn’t seem right. It doesn’t seem fair. I didn’t do anything special to get this recognition. I merely survived.”
“You mean the Distinguished Constellation of the Star Runner.”
“Yes.” He thought of the award, felt his stomach turn. “I don’t want the recognition. I hate people talking about me like I did something amazing. I just want to fly.”
Carpenter took another drink from her coffee mug. “I think there’s more to it than that. You’ve seen people die. Some veterans fly their entire career without witnessing a death, and you’ve been through all of this in the past year. I think you need to give yourself time.”
“I don’t know.” He sighed. “I think my luck has run out.”
Carpenter blinked. “I’m sorry?”
He felt like he lingered at the edge of a cliff, afraid to go into detail about his feelings. “Every time I get in the cockpit, my time has run out. Don’t get me wrong. I still love it. I just think I’m due. I can’t be this fortunate forever.”
She leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. “We’re all going to die.”
Austin snorted. “Thanks, Doc.”
She smiled. “I’m serious. There are no answers for why some of us die and some of us don’t. You are facing some serious questions, and you need to give yourself time to sort this out.”
Turning to her side, she pulled a tablet from the file cabinet. She activated it and began typing.
“I’d like to see you again,” she said. “I think it’s good you came to me.”
Austin tensed. “Are you going to ground me?”
“Ground you?” She laughed. “Of course not. I hate to burst your bubble, Lieutenant, but you’re not the first Star Runner to come to me to discuss nightmares following a battle. I just sent you a meeting invite and will write you a prescription for the sedative. I’d like us to chat monthly to discuss whatever you’d like. I don’t want you to let these feelings fester. Understood?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Austin stood. “I appreciate it.”
“My pleasure. For now, try not to think too much. Your records show you to be an incredible Star Runner. You might not believe it, but you are that good, Lieutenant. You just need to gain some confidence.”
Austin nodded his face warming. “Thank you.”
*****
“The supply ship, Sanctuary, will be arriving tomorrow to resupply the science station Ramelle,” Captain Zyan said. “From now until then, we will be tripling our patrols.”
The Star Runners gathered in the briefing room, some lining the back wall as they typed into their tablets. Austin noticed everyone’s good humor had darkened in the past days, camaraderie and conversation slowing to a trickle. When anyone did speak, it only consisted of necessary exchanges. He stared at the floor as Ryker warmed up the holographic projector for the briefing. The room’s lighting faded, the projector humming softly.
According to a post on the Formidable's internal message boards, the funeral for all Star Runners lost to the Wraith would be held later. This included Gan Patro. Austin could still see the shy pilot’s face onboard Tarton’s Junction. Gan had been one of the first Star Runners to speak to Austin when he arrived on Tarton’s Junction, one of the first people from another world Austin had ever met. Gan was excited at first, enjoying the fact he would be able to fly Tridents for a living.
But that was before, before the Tyral Pirate attacks and the looming threat of destruction. He had never been the same since Etti Mar had been killed by Dax Rodon and his band of thugs, focusing afterward on training and the task at hand. But the light had faded from his eyes by the time Austin saw him at the Battle of Atlantis.
And now he was gone.
So many pilots had been killed in Quadrant Eight over the past months—and that was only the ones Austin knew. Since he had boarded the Formidable, his vision narrowed to a very fine view of the universe that included his quarters, the briefing room, and the Trident cockpit. Sometimes he found it hard to believe he had ever done anything else.
He looked up at Ryker standing in front of her Star Runners as she prepared her briefing. Dark patches formed under her eyes, her tan skin looking paler than normal. She seemed tired and unhappy. Austin wanted to go to her, talk to her the way he had on Oma.
But she made it clear she was more interested in her career.
He glanced over at Skylar, who sat a few seats to his right. She looked back at him, a smile appearing at the corner of her lips.
“All right,” Ryker said, slapping her hands together. She stared at Austin for a moment. “Here we go.”
The hologram of the Formidable appeared behind her. The view extended to show Ramelle and the surrounding space.
“The Sanctuary will be arriving tomorrow,” she said, the hologram highlighting a rectangle away from the Formidable. “Protocol calls for them to curve in at ten-thousand MUs to avoid a collision. Frankly, under the circumstances, I would like it if we could break protocol.” The Sanctuary appeared on the screen. “Tarnex and Lobera will form a perimeter around the Formidable to provide a fighter umbrella for our carrier. Tizona has been charged with escorting the Sanctuary back to the Ramelle.”
The view shifted to the supply ship. “Now,” Ryker continued, “we will form a moving perimeter around the supply ship here. We will have three Tridents at the bow and stern of the ship, two above and below, and one at starboard and port. Once we are in position, we will proceed toward the Ramelle. The supply ship isn’t the quickest out there, but the entire operation should only take twenty minutes. Once the Ramelle docks with the Sanctuary, the resupply will commence. We will stay in position while the supplies are loaded. All right, here are the assignments.”
Images of Tridents appeared in position around the supply ship. Austin’s position downloaded to his tablet. Ryker had placed him directly in front of the Sanctuary with Reaper and Star on his flanks. The remainder of the flight ready Tizona Star Runners filled in the positions around the supply ship. As long as regulations would let them fly, they were going on this mission. Austin thought of Bear recovering i
n sickbay, knew he would want to be on this mission to exact a little revenge on the Wraith … if it showed up.
Austin stared at the hologram, saw the amount of Legion ships involved. The Wraith would show. Somehow, he knew it would.
Martin “Sketch” Bolin raised his hand. “Is the Sanctuary carrying Tridents?”
“Yes,” Ryker said with a nod. “They will be offloaded to serve on the Ramelle. But they are not combat ready. They do not have Star Runners on board. I’m told the replacement Star Runners will be arriving with whatever carrier is being sent here to relieve us.”
The entire room seemed to exhale at the same time. Austin didn’t realize it at first, but the thought of leaving this remote area of space provided a sense of relief. They had been here long enough.
“Any more questions?” Ryker surveyed the room, her eyes falling on Austin. “Be careful out there. All of you. Keep your eyes open. Call out any bogeys if you see them. Let’s get this over with. Dismissed.”
The Star Runners slapped their tablets shut, creating a pattering of pops like someone played with bubblewrap. The pilots began filing out of the room. Austin stood and stretched, the uneasy feeling in his gut intensifying. Although he had tried to battle back the looming negative voice in his head, it still boomed into his subconscious.
What if this is the last time I’m in this briefing room?
Gan died yesterday—what if I’m next? Did he have any idea it would all truly end when he climbed into the Trident for the final time?
He closed his eyes, exhaling slowly through his nose. Dr. Carpenter told him not to think too much. He tried to take in another deliberate breath. When he looked around the room again, he caught Ryker staring at him. She looked back to her tablet briefly before locking her gaze on him.
“Be careful,” she mouthed without speaking.
Austin’s stomach fluttered. He wondered if her concern was out of love or friendship. Austin was so tired thinking about it. He gave her a half smile and then looked away.