by Corn, Laura
The only trick to this seduction is getting out of bed a little early on Saturday morning without waking your sweetie. Jump in the shower and get squeaky clean. Make sure your mouth is sparkly fresh — use toothpaste and mouthwash. You don’t really need deodorant this soon, but if you use it, pick one that’s clear and unscented.
Now for your first secret weapon: a touch of cologne. A light touch, please. Don’t splash it on; don’t rub it over your face. The best way to apply it is the same way women do: Spray it into the air, wait three seconds, then walk through the mist of fragrance.
So what should you buy? Well, there’s the tried and true Old Spice, which is even sexier now that it features a hottie on a horse! Just avoid anything advertised by a football player, or sold by the quart. Do not use the same cologne you wore to your senior prom. The best scents can be kind of expensive, as you know if you’ve ever bought the real stuff at a department store. But you don’t need a big bottle for this seduction -— one of those little sample tubes will do. And thanks to the Internet, there’s a great way to get your hands on all the samples you could ever want, delivered to your door at a buck a pop. This website is listed in the ingredients, but the hottest scents around (according to my girlfriends) are right here under your nose:
Issey Miyake
Giorgio Armani
Chanel Allure for Men
And if you insist on going Old School, try Drakkar.
Ready? Then go ahead and slip back into bed. She’s going to wake up and smell paradise.
Start easy, with lots of nuzzling and touching. If she pulls back and says something about her morning breath, reach to the nightstand for your second secret weapon: Altoids. (Did you know they’re not just for blowjobs??)
Smell-Good Sex is usually slo-oo-ow sex, and with that luscious scent drifting from you, she’s going to want to be face-to-face... or face-to-neck, and face-to-chest. Start on top, hold her close and pump away, allowing your new aroma to fuel her fantasies. Make sure she has all the orgasms she wants, because that’s what will activate your third secret weapon: a scientifically-proven phenomenon called imprinting. From now on, every time she smells that fragrance on you, she’s going to think of sex, and how much she wants it.
Come to think of it, maybe you should buy the bigger bottle.
This is the end of this chapter. Click here to go back to the Table of Contents
NO. 24 WAH-WAH-WOW!!!
INGREDIENTS
2 one-piece vibrators with adjustable speed controls (Corn’s recommendation: Buy Two Breeze 3-Speed Power Bullets at www.thepleasurechest.com only $14.95 a piece)
1 gift bag
FREE BONUS! e-tease her at 101nights.com/Wah-Wah-Wow
HEAD’S UP!
One of the vibrators purchased for this seduction can also be used for Position of Submission, Morning Muffin, and Light Me Up, Baby.
IF YOU’VE EVER TUNED A GUITAR or ridden in a twin-engine boat, you’re familiar with the wah-wah effect that happens when two sounds are close in pitch, but not exactly the same. It’s the sound of two notes fighting each other, and it’s called constructive interference.
I’m no acoustic engineer, so I’m not interested in explanations of sine waves and amplitudes; I’d rather talk about orgasms. Or, more precisely, use science to help you create [drum roll]... The World’s Most Powerful Orgasm. (“BWAH-HAH-HAH hah-hah-hah!” cackled the horny mad scientist. “Oh, no” cried the helpless maiden, “Not another powerful orgasm!”)
You will need two vibrators to create this extraordinary treat. They should be one-piece units—easy to handle, like drumsticks. Important: they must have an adjustable speed controller, not just an on-off switch. Before your night begins, test your vibes and make sure you can tune them to the same pitch. (As always, wash them thoroughly. That’s just good sex-toy manners!) Put them into a gift bag, and if you want to make an impression—and impressions count—use a velvet bag.
Early in the week, ask your sweetie for a date. It can be fancy or a simple takeout dinner. The important thing is that you plan something rather than nothing. Simple, but it’s the difference between romance and being taken for granted. Or, to put it another way, it can be the difference between “Let’s go to sleep” and “Let’s screw like weasels.”
Meanwhile, here’s another trick that makes a woman feel like taking off her sweats and putting on her nightie: straighten up the bedroom. Whoa, wait, don’t toss this page! I’m not saying you have to change the sheets or actually clean the place. Just make the bed. Put your stuff in the closet. Light a few candles.
It won’t be long before your girl is happy and aroused and sprawled in bed. Slip down between her thighs and work some magic with your tongue, and then, after a few minutes, reach for your gift bag, hidden under the bed. Hold it high, and smile. You don’t even have to say a word. Just reach in and slide out one of your new toys. Pop the end into your mouth to get it wet, and then turn it on low. Ahhh. What a lovely sound. Every woman adores it. Don’t apply the buzzer straight to the clit; it’s much too soon for that. Instead, draw a loop around her whole vulva, slowly circling in toward her lips. Alternate between your tongue and the toy, gradually ramping up the intensity of your action. Take one of her labia into your mouth while stroking the other with the vibe. Tease her. And then...
Hold up your gift bag again. Let her watch you reach in and pull out the other toy. She’s thinking, “Wow, this is getting interesting.” Turn it low, like the first vibe, and stroke her with it. Stroke her with the other one again. Then stroke her with both. Hold them parallel and glide them alongside her clitoris, just for a moment. She might gasp; the sensation is intense. Turn up the speed on both machines, and use them to draw patterns on her.
Your new friend, constructive interference, is about to swagger into the room and help make things crazier. Speed up the vibes more, but tune them so they are not quite on the same note. Feel the beat? That wah-wah sound is even more intense when you feel it pounding your hand. The slow pulse of interference is more than noise; it’s a visceral shake—and you’re about to use that power to shake up your lover.
Press the two toys against her on either side of her swollen clit. Send that powerful wah-wah beat through her. Slide the toys up and down her lips. Put one of them inside again, just two inches deep, right where her G-spot is now screaming for relief; put the other one outside, near her clitoris, and oh... my... god—the pleasure is strong, overwhelming... bigger than anything she has felt before.
The beat of the fighting vibrations carries her to a place where she can no longer control her body. A place where she can only curl her toes, arch her back, and ride along with the pulses. A place where she might say dirty things and not even remember them. A place she’ll want to visit again and again, and take you with her...
This is the end of this chapter. Click here to go back to the Table of Contents
NO. 25 SHE’S OUT OF CONTROL
INGREDIENTS
Several candles
Hot music
1 long silk scarf
1 remote control vibrator
1 aggressive email (in which you instruct her to bring 1 large pillow and 1 wooden hanger to the bedroom at a designated time)
Two short lengths of nylon rope
FREE BONUS! e-tease her at 101nights.com/ShesOutofControl
HEAD’S UP!
The remote control vibrator purchased for this seduction can also be used for Popping Her Clutch, Morning Muffin, Position of Submission and Light Me Up, Baby.
EQUAL SCHMEQUAL. Tonight, you will be Master; she will be your servant. And she will learn the intensely erotic pleasures of sexual submission.
Your roles must be established as soon as she meets you at the bedroom door. As Commander, you are charming and pleasant, but give no more information than she needs. Why did she bring the large pillow, as spelled out in your email? Why the sturdy wooden coat hanger? “Oh, you’ll see,” you say slyly and smoothly. “Or
, actually, you won’t see. I don’t want to spoil the surprise.”
At this point, you pass a long silk scarf across her eyes and tie it behind her head. Ask her to hold the hanger, gripping the ends, then—while telling her how lovely she is, and how much you’ve been thinking of her—tie her wrists to the hanger.
Gently press her back to the bedroom door. Lift her arms over her head, and then hook the hanger over the top of the door. Caress her; kiss her neck. “Wha... what are you doing?” she’ll undoubtly ask. “Why... whatever I want to. And, oh, there doesn’t seem to be anything you can do about it, does there?” Squeeze her nipple, kiss her face. Tell her to be a good girl, to do exactly as her Master says, and she’ll get a great big surprise. “I have a few things to do... and I want you to stay right here, where I can... mmm, well... play with you.”
Go start the music, light some candles, arrange some pillows. But every time you finish a task, walk up to her and touch her, caress her, kiss her. Unzip this, unbutton that. Lead her, bound and blindfolded, through the slowest and most sensuous strip tease of her life. This time, though, it’s you who is doing the teasing.
Finally, it’s time to free her hands and bring her to your special Altar of Eros: a pile of pillows—including the one she brought, of course—laid on the floor at the foot of the bed. Resting at its center: electric magic. Possibly the greatest invention of the century. A vibrator, charged and ready for action.
Instruct her to kneel, facing the bed and straddling the pillows, and adjust the toy so that it is in just the right place. Sit on the edge of the bed directly in front of her; let her watch, wide-eyed and aroused, as you slowly squeeze and stroke your swelling erection. “And now, you have a very important job to do. It will demand your total concentration and focus. You must take this”—the stiffening erection now rubbing against her face, sliding across her lips—“and make it feel just as good... as that...”
Turn on the vibrator. Set the remote control to slow, at first; it will be more than enough to make her quiver. Now, vary the speed. Slowly notch it up, accelerating the cycle of arousal. Chase that delicious buzz from her lips to your erection to the controller to the toy to her pulsing little clit and straight up her electrified spine, around and around until she explodes, with your own orgasm not far behind.
I have a prediction to make. The next time she’s with her friends and they start to complain about the way their men monopolize the remote control, I bet your sweetheart will simply smile and say, “Maybe, they just don’t know how to use it right...”
This is the end of this chapter. Click here to go back to the Table of Contents
NO. 27 HER NEW BFF
INGREDIENTS
1 new loud vibrator (check out the excellent selection at www.thepleasurechest.com. They give you a “noise level” for each of their vibrators.)
batteries
candles
massage lotion
FREE BONUS! e-tease her at 101nights.com/HerNewBFF
HEAD’S UP!
The vibrator in this seduction can also be used for Morning Muffin, Position of Submission and Light Me Up Baby.
TODAY WE COMMEMORATE DR. GEORGE TAYLOR, the brilliant man who, in the American spirit of efficiency and convenience, forever changed the world with the invention of the vibrator. The year was 1869, and the good doctor was a bit ahead of his time. So long as sex toys were powered by steam and burning coal, they would remain impractical, not to mention slightly dangerous. It would be another twenty years before cheap electricity brought orgasms-on-tap to the bedrooms of average (and deeply contented) women across the country.
You gotta admire the guy for trying, though. Today, vibes are everywhere–in Walgreen’s, Target, even Sears–even if they never say what they’re really used for (they’re “neck massagers,” Ri-i-ight). Anyway, those will do the trick, but for a really great selection of fun shapes and sizes, head to your local adult boutique this week and pick out a new one for your sweetie. Yes, this week’s sex homework is about you taking the time to buy her a new toy. After all, a woman can never have enough vibes. Each vibrator in your seduction toolbox provides a unique sensation (and sound!), so have fun and get creative. But remember Laura’s Rule of Sex Toys: nothing intimidating or scary. There’s a difference between making her wet, and making her wet herself.
Sometime this week, send her an e-mail like this: “Did you hear that sound?” Next day, send another: “I heard it again! It sounded like... sex....”
On the day you spring your surprise, make sure you’ve got the whole house to yourselves and have no pressing appointments. Wander into the kitchen with an innocent look on your face — as innocent as you can manage, given that you’re about to get laid — and ask your honey:
“Can you hear that? That sound, what is it? No, really, it’s like a buzz or something... back this way, down the hall. Now can you hear it? It’s a little louder now... Is it in the bedroom? Can you tell what it is?...”
Now she knows something’s up, for sure, because the bedroom is dim, lit only by candles, and the buzz is coming right from a suspicious lump under the bedspread. Sure, she’ll be laughing at your transparent trick, but her grin will take on a wicked edge when she pulls back the sheets to find a brand new vibrator, humming merrily along and just begging to be used.
“Oh, my gosh; how did THAT get there?! What a surprise! Well, I guess we might as well see what that baby can do...”
What it can do, of course, is make her come faster than you would think humanly possible, so don’t rush right into toy-time. Start with deep, long kisses. Undress, then kiss some more. A little vibe, then more kisses, then vibe, then kiss, then massage, then kiss, then vibe vibe vibe vibe vibevibe v-v-v-vvv-vv-vibevibevibe woo-hoo VIBE!
Then break out a fresh pack of batteries. And say a word of thanks to Dr. Taylor. He’s my hero.
This is the end of this chapter. Click here to go back to the Table of Contents
NO. 31 WICKED VIEW
INGREDIENTS
1 large mirror (Inexpensive models designed to hang on the back of doors work great.)
several candles
pillows or cushions
vibrator, optional
personal lubricant, optional
IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW MANY TIMES you tell her that you love her. And that she is gorgeous. And that she turns you on. Deep down inside, she still has a tiny bit of insecurity. When she looks in the mirror, she sees flaws. She can’t help it. She sees the stars and celebrities who glow on our screens, and she can’t help but feel...ordinary.
If only she could see herself through your eyes. Oh, wait—she can. You can show her exactly how hot she is. No video, no Internet, no technology required. All you need is a mirror.
Early in the day, leave a message for her. Text, voicemail, sticky note; it doesn’t matter. Just tell her that you have something you want to show her tonight, something hot. When evening comes around, crank up her sense of anticipation: Chase her out of the bedroom while you set up her surprise. I guarantee she’ll be pacing on the other side of the door, like a cat in heat, waiting to get back in.
She’ll expect a romantic setting in the room, and sure enough, you have candles lit and music playing. Plus there’s a new addition—a good-sized mirror, propped up against the wall or the dresser. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive, but tall enough so that you can see most of yourself in the reflection. Ignore it at first. Kiss her and caress her; tug her clothes off and roll around on the bed with her. Tell her how much she means to you. Tell her she’s beautiful. Tell her that you fall in love with her all over again every time you see her. Do not be embarrassed to praise her. She longs to hear those words. If you’re like most men, you probably don’t say them enough. She will want to believe them.
But to completely convince her—to give her indisputable proof of how amazingly sexy she is—you’ve got to show her. Ask her to join you on the floor, right in front of the mirror. Pile some pi
llows on the floor for comfort, and bring the candles closer for better light. Sit down and lean against the bed for support, then ask her to sit between your legs, with her back against your chest. Make sure you can both see your reflections. Now tell her to look at herself, naked in the mirror. Rave about her body. Make her understand that this image—her, undressed, legs apart—is what you dream about. It’s the most beautiful thing you know. It’s the vision you have when you are making love to her, and you wanted her to see for herself just what a powerful, erotic, perfect sight it is. Then tell her to play with herself.
You can reach around to help her get started. If you like, you can bring out a vibrator. Run your hands over her skin. Kiss her neck. Cup her breasts while she unfolds her lips and slips her fingers between them. Soon, her fingertips will be circling faster, and she will be hypnotized by the view. And soon, because she can see your eyes in the mirror—because she can see the truth in them—she will come to believe you are right. She really is hot. And this is sexy, crazy sexy, like watching another couple doing it. Like being watched by another couple while she masturbates. And, hello, she’s feeling you get aroused behind her, too. Shift a little to one side so you can join her in self-pleasure. Stroke yourself, while she does the same, side by side. Can you time it just right? Can you watch yourselves come together? You can.
And I have a surprise for you. You’ll discover it the next time you join her in the bedroom. Because you have removed much of her self-doubt, you have made her a better lover. And that is the real magic of the mirror.