by Dojyomaru
“I humbly submit that I do.”
“You can do more than recite the law from memory, then?”
“With all due respect, I believe I have told you as much. ‘Law, literature, technical manuals, I’ll read anything,’ I said. I have information on every field of study stored inside my head.”
“I see...” Now I knew what had been bothering me before. Though he could recite the law from memory, he had said he read all sorts of books. That meant his knowledge wasn’t limited to just law. For him, the laws he’d memorized were just one small fragment of the diverse knowledge he possessed. “Why didn’t you say so earlier?”
“I sought to judge whether you were a ruler worthy of my service.”
“Then, does this mean I’m worthy?”
“You receive a passing mark, I suppose.”
What insolence, I thought. Still... He’s amusing. Is he boasting, or does he have the skill to back it up...? Either way, there’s no way to know just yet, I guess.
“I’ll leave you to Marx!” I said. “Judge this one’s gift and give him a position suited to it.”
“Very well, sire.”
“Thank you very much.”
Marx and Hakuya both bowed.
A few days later, Marx would rush into the governmental affairs office, crying, “Sire, would you ask me to teach a wyvern to fly?!” It was an idiomatic expression from this world for trying to teach someone who knows more than you.
At this time, I had no way of knowing that this had been my first meeting with the man who would come to be known as the Black-robed Prime Minister.
◇ ◇ ◇
In history, there are some scenes which are easily dramatized by later generations. There are some conditions for this:
First, it must be the turning point of an era.
Second, it must have a certain flair when dramatized.
These are the two conditions.
In Elfrieden history, the scene most dramatized in later years was “King Souma’s Gathering of Personnel.” It is said that there are three main characters in this scene.
Seen from Souma’s perspective, this was one of his great accomplishments. From the perspective of the man who would come to be called the Black-robed Prime Minister, Hakuya Kwonmin, it was to become “the turning point of an era.” And from the perspective of a certain other person, it was the turning point in the Cinderella story of their life.
However, there are different theories on who that third person is.
Some say it was the Warrior of the Eastern Wind, Aisha Udgard, who, despite being a dark elf who lived in the forest, swore her loyalty the king, and from that point on was always at his side serving him.
Some say it was the Prima Lorelei, Juna Doma, who was recognized by the king, learned the songs of his country, gave birth to the concept of a lorelei, which was the word that came to mean an idol singer in Elfrieden, and was loved by king and people alike.
Some say it was the Wise Wolf Princess, Tomoe Inui, who, despite being a refugee, was instantly adored by King Souma and Queen Liscia, and taken in as the queen’s adopted sister.
However, the one most featured in dramatizations was Poncho Ishizuka Panacotta.
Mocked by all around him for his weight, this unspectacular glutton of a man was, through “The King’s Gathering of Personnel,” able to turn his life around. For the people exhausted with their daily lives, this true story moved them and gave them energy, and so it came to be dramatized many times.
It seems odd to call the tale of a rotund man a Cinderella story. Yet, despite being a little scatterbrained, he was hard not to like. He was loved by all, and so they said it suited him perfectly.
In addition, because the King’s emotional welcoming of Poncho was broadcast throughout the kingdom, it had the unexpected side effect of many gifted people gathering in Elfrieden, thinking, “If even a guy like that can become important, so can I...” From this event, in later years, a new proverb meaning “start with small things” was created.
“Start from Ishizuka.”
Chapter 3: Let’s Create a Broadcast Program
Around the time that the commotion from Souma’s personnel gathering had settled, a certain ghost story began to spread in the castle town of the capital Parnam.
According to the tales, there was a mannequin that roamed the streets at night. It was the type of doll you could see in clothing shops: faceless, with arm and leg joints. Carrying swords in both hands, it stalked the streets night by night, hunting animals and monsters.
One adventurer said this:
“A while back, I took a quest from the guild to escort a peddler and was walking around the streets at night, y’see, when we had the bad luck to get surrounded by some subspecies of gelin (those gel things). They’re weak individually, but this time there were a lot of them, and the battle was going badly. Then a mannequin carrying swords in both hands tottered along from the direction of the palace and attacked the gelins. It was such a creepy sight that we bolted right away, but... I wonder what was up with that thing.”
Another adventurer said this:
“It was a week ago. I took a mission from the guild that said, ‘A group of hobgoblins has crossed the border to the north and is traveling southwards. We want you to intercept them.’ We were waiting in a valley that was along their route to intercept them, but wait as we might, they never appeared. Something seemed strange, so we went scouting for them, and what we found was a mannequin standing in the middle of a pile of brutally killed hobgoblin bodies. Thinking it was some new type of monster, me and my warrior buddy attacked it, but it parried us with two swords it carried. When our mage tried hitting it with fire, it ran off at an incredible speed. That thing... it’s probably a new autonomous weapon created by the demon king, don’t you think?”
There were many sightings, and though many said it was a ghost story, it was almost certain that it existed. However, when the adventurers’ guild recognized its existence and quests to capture or destroy it were issued, all sightings stopped.
After that, some wondered if it hadn’t been a prank by someone.
◇ ◇ ◇
“...so, well, there are rumors like that going around in the castle town, you know?” Liscia told me.
“Oh, yeah, are there now?” I asked.
As I lay back on the sofa, my hand with the needle not stopping as I responded to her, Liscia, who was sitting on the bed, took on a slightly upset tone.
“...What? Don’t stories like this interest you?”
“No, it’s not like that, but...”
“Souma, you’re the king, so shouldn’t stories that are causing unrest in the castle town be important to you?” she said.
“You don’t need to worry about it. That mannequin won’t be showing up again.”
“...Do you know something about it?”
“Yeah, sorta...”
I packed the “cotton” in while I gave vague answers. Now, I just had to sew the back closed and it would be done.
“...And, hold on, what are you doing there, Souma?”
“What? Exactly what it looks like. Sewing.”
“No, I’m asking why you’re coming to my room to sew!”
“Well, where else would I go? My room’s still the governmental affairs office, after all.”
Recently, the amount of work to be done had settled down a bit, so while my Living Poltergeist pens were working, my main body could rest like this. Though, that said, the governmental affairs office where my bed was always had a lot of officials coming in and out of it, so it was a bit hard to take it easy there.
“Besides, you know how Aisha’s been lately...” I added.
“I can guess...” she said.
Recently, Aisha had become so clingy that she would never leave my side.
When a dark elf pledges their loyalty to someone, they pride themselves on staying by that person’s side and protecting them until the day they themselves die, apparently.
That was why Aisha had appointed herself as my bodyguard, and whether it was work time, meal time, or sleep time, she tried to follow me everywhere I went, even into the bath and toilet. I thought it was problematic to have someone who hadn’t even officially been hired yet so close to the king, but she was beautiful, highly loyal, and her skills were well known, so Ludwin and the royal guards turned a blind eye to her. As for Hakuya, who had taken over the post of prime minister from Marx, he said:
“Is it not lovely to be surrounded by such beauties? The princess, Madam Aisha, Madam Juna... it matters not to me which you choose, but please hurry up and give us a child. It will bring stability to the royal house.”
That’s a hell of a thing to say so easily. Good grief.
While I was thinking about that, Liscia came over and poked me in the back.
“I bet you don’t actually mind the attention, do you?”
“Give me a break. Just when I was finally able to get some rest... Wait, huh? Come to think of it, where’s Tomoe?”
“Tomoe is over in Mother and Father’s room. Mother’s taken a liking to her...”
Just a few days ago, Tomoe had come to the castle to live as Liscia’s adopted sister. Of course, as we had promised, her family had come with her, too.
Incidentally, Tomoe’s mother worked at the palace daycare facility, which we had set up as an experiment to help encourage the advancement of women in society. She stayed with the wet nurses, caring for other people’s children at the same time as her own. This daycare facility was a hit with the young maids, who said, “Now I can get married without worrying.”
With maternity leave being nonexistent at present, women were often dismissed the moment they got pregnant. That was why, unless they became a king’s mistress, most of the maids spent their entire lives single.
But I digress. Basically, it meant Tomoe had two mothers in the palace. She had seemed a little bewildered at first, but now both of them adored her.
Liscia stood up and, resting her hands on the back of the sofa, she peeked over my shoulder. “Still, when you have time off, you sew...? Is that a doll?”
“Oh, this? It’s Little Musashibo.”
I finished sewing up the doll’s back, presenting it to Liscia.
“Little Musashibo?”
“Yeah. He’s from my world... Something like a rare and exotic beast, I guess?”
Little Musashibo was a cute super-deformed mascot based on Musashibo Benkei from the city I lived in. A white silk face. A Buddhist priest’s stole and prayer beads. Big bushy eyebrows that looked imposing, but adorable acorn eyes underneath. People liked that gap, so he was well received.
By the way, the city where I had lived had absolutely no connection to Musashibo Benkei. So why Benkei then, you might wonder? Well, “because long ago Saitama Prefecture was known as Musashi Province.” That was the only reason.
Now, you might ask, “Then, wouldn’t Musashi Miyamoto or Musashimaru have worked just as well?” or, “If it’s because of Musashi Province, doesn’t that cover all of Saitama?” but to do so would be boorish.
You don’t think, you feel. That’s just how mascot characters are.
“Urkh... It makes me mad how surprisingly cute it is,” Liscia said, looking at the Little Musashibo doll. “Still, why would you make something like this?”
“Well, actually... turns out my Living Poltergeists works really well with dolls.”
With those words, I focused, and Little Musashibo began to move before our eyes. He used his short little arms and legs to break dance. That he was good at it only made it more surreal.
Liscia stared, dumbstruck. “What is this...?”
“When I use it on a pen, all I can do is make it float around, but with a doll, I can move it around almost as if I were inside it. What’s more, with dolls, the limits on distance go away.”
Up until now, I had only been able to manipulate objects up to 100 meters away, but with dolls, I was able to send them not just into the castle town but beyond the walls.
“That’s certainly impressive, but... What are you going to do, become a street performer?” Liscia looked exasperatedly at Little Musashibo.
“Ha ha, now there’s an idea. Maybe I’ll quit being king and make a living on the road.”
“Don’t be silly. I won’t let you abandon the job halfway.”
“...I know that. Anyway, here’s the important bit.”
I gave Little Musashibo two short swords. When I did, despite being made of felt and stuffed with cotton, Little Musashibo managed to hold two swords that would have felt heavy in the hands of a grown man. Little Musashibo posed like Musashi Miyamoto with his two swords.
Liscia’s eyes went wide. “No way... It’s a doll, right?”
“It seems that when a doll holds something, its counted as an optional item for the doll. What’s more, it can use any items I equip it with freely. As a test, I gave another doll some weapons and tried sending it to fight monsters. It managed to fight just fine.”
“A doll fighting monsters. Wait... The mannequin from the rumors!”
“Yeah. I used a doll I happened to find around the palace to experiment.”
I had never imagined there would be rumors about it, though. I had tried to do my tests at night when there wouldn’t be people around to see, but maybe that had just made it feel even more like something out of a ghost story.
“Thanks to that, I found out they can hold their own against monsters. On top of that, the more experience they gain, the better the dolls get at moving.”
As I said that, Little Musashibo spread the arms he was still holding the short swords with wide, spinning in circles fast enough that you almost expected a “whoosh” sound effect to pop up. He looked like a big spinning top, but he was actually like a revolving saw turned sideways, so he was more dangerous than he looked.
“Is the training done by the dolls reflected on your main body?” Liscia asked.
“If it were, that would make it one broken ability. Sadly, no; even if the doll learns to use a technique, I can’t reproduce it myself. Maybe it’s because I don’t have the muscle strength for it? My body’s still weak.”
“Hmm... Why not work out?”
“I think it’s a more effective use of my time to improve my ability to control the dolls than to try to get stronger myself. No matter how much I work out, I’m not going to get tough enough that it’s better than keeping three strong dolls around me.”
“That’s not how a hero fights.” Liscia said, exasperated.
Sadly, I had to agree with that assessment.
In fantasy works from my old world, my job class would have been Doll Master or Puppeteer, probably. Those sorts of jobs tended to be mid-range support types. That’s a long way away from the mid to close-range attacker type impression that most people have of a hero.
“When I watch you, I can feel my image of what a hero is falling to pieces...” Liscia said.
“Ha ha ha...” I chuckled. “Don’t worry. I feel the same.”
In roughly a month since I was summoned, all I had done was domestic politics. Since all I planned to do for the next few months was domestic politics as well, could I really call myself a hero? No, I could not. (Rhetorical question.)
Suddenly, a knock came at the door.
“Excuse me,” someone said, entering with a bow.
It was the palace’s head maid and Liscia’s personal attendant, Serina. An intellectual beauty who was five years older than Liscia, she was as talented as she appeared, a woman who knew how to get her job done.
When Serina saw my face, she lowered her head reverently.
“Your Majesty, Sir Hakuya sends word that ‘Sir Poncho and the others have all gathered.’”
“They’re here, huh? I’ve been waiting!” I rose from my seat eagerly, taking Liscia by the hand. “Let’s go, Liscia.”
“Huh? What?!”
When I suddenly grabbed her hand, Liscia blushed.
“Oh, my word, Princess,” Serina said. “To think you would blush just from holding hands... With such innocence, how will you ever attend to your nightly duties with His Majesty?”
“Serina?! What are you saying?!”
“Please, let me hold your child soon. You do know how babies are made, yes?”
“Augh! You’re always teasing me!”
...Serina was a capable maid, but she had a bad habit of being downright sadistic to cute girls. Her master Liscia was no exception to that. Well, I guess that meant their bond of trust was strong enough to allow it. So long as she didn’t turn that sadism towards me, she was a very capable worker.
“Well, we’re heading off,” I said.
“Hey, wait, Souma,” Liscia objected.
“Take care!” Serina called. As we left the room, she saw us off with a bow.
We picked up Aisha along the way, and by the time we arrived at the meeting room, all of those who had been summoned had gathered.
At the round table in the center of the room sat Hakuya the prime minister, Tomoe my sister-in-law, Juna the lorelei, and Poncho Ishizuka Panacotta. If we excluded Ludwin, who was occupied with another matter, and Marx, who had relinquished the title of prime minister to Hakuya and now managed the palace, everyone who had been present for the gathering of personnel was here.
“Your Majesty,” they all said, rising.
“Please, remain seated,” I told them, holding out my hand. “I’m the one who called all of you here.”
Liscia and I took our seats, as well. Aisha was the only one who remained standing, hovering behind me so that she could act at once in case anything should happen. Honestly, it was bothering me having her stand there, so I asked her to sit, but she stubbornly refused.
Weren’t you supposed to follow your master’s orders? I thought with annoyance.
...Well, we’ll set that aside for now.
“Everyone, thank you for coming,” I said. “I give you my heartfelt thanks.”
“N-N-N-Not at all! I-I-I-It was nothing!” Poncho stammered.
“Sire, do not bow your head so easily,” Hakuya said. Beside the flustered Poncho, Hakuya had a disapproving look on his face. “If the one at the top abases himself so, there may be those who come to look down on him.”