by Indiana Wake
Rena had finally managed to string together a few words in her head to form a coherent sentence, and she opened her mouth to reply. But now he was reading and she stopped herself, not wanting to disturb him and appear rude. Maybe this was a custom here. To talk and then to contemplate so she sat silently and thought over all that had happened. It was not the start she had hoped for. There had been disappointment in his eyes. Maybe she was not pretty enough for him. Maybe she was not what he had expected? She tried to swallow, but her mouth was dry. What now? What would happen to her if he did not approve… if he did not want her?
The carriage rolled on and on and as the silence stretched, the unsaid words between them seemed to have a life of their own. They gained an undeniable presence that filled up the carriage and rode with them all the way back to Victor’s house. Rena found it hard to breathe. It was as if the hot air had seared her throat and the pressure of his disappointment crushed her lungs. She wanted to break the silence. Wanted to ask all the question she had rehearsed on her long journey, but she did not know how. So instead she sat alone and her hope seemed to shrivel inside her. It seemed all her fears and doubts had come true.
Chapter Four
As they neared the house, Victor looked up from his Bible, surreptitiously watching Rena. She was peering up at the house, and with narrowed eyes, she was trying to read the inscription on the gate. Victor, however, saw the narrowed eyes and assumed she was looking at the house in disapproval of its size and stature. He was hurt by this. He had sought a wife because he was lonely and wanted someone to love, but this girl seemed to be disappointed in the life he had to offer her. How he had wanted a woman to build with him. To support him and help him better himself but it seemed that this was not what she expected. From her letters, he had thought them to be soul mates. He had believed that they would bring love and joy into the house and that they would build a future together. For months, he had anticipated her arrival and to find out that she was disappointed in him was like a downpour before the harvest. It was devastating and ruined any chance for the future.
His house was not a mansion, but he was better off than many. The farm and ranch gave him a good income and he hoped to build it so that their children would have a grand future. But that was gone now. Maybe she would look for someone else or maybe she would go home. Disappointment weighed heavy on his shoulders as they approached the house. The carriage came to a stop and not knowing what to do or say he morosely descended from the carriage and asked the footman to help Rena into the house.
Rena watched her betrothed leave the carriage without a word to her and walk off towards his dwelling. She was hurt that he wouldn’t even bring her into the house and help her settle into this new life. In her culture, such treatment was beyond rude and she wondered what she was doing here. For a moment, she looked back the way they had come. Should she just pick up her kimono and walk back to the docks? Would the ship be returning and would they let her have passage? She knew they would not and as Grandmother always said, once you have made the bed you may as well sleep in it. She was here and she would not give up on this marriage until she had given it a good go. Maybe they had just got off on the wrong foot. Maybe she could see what had gone wrong and fix it?
She watched Victor’s broad back retreating through the door and bit back tears. She had wanted somebody who would love and cherish her, but she was starting to think that Victor Montgomery didn’t care very much about the girl who had sailed halfway around the world to meet him. So she had two choices, give up or work harder to make him see who she really was. At that moment, she wondered about Grandmother’s Chie’s vision of her future. Had it changed?
Slowly she got out of the carriage and followed the footman into the house. Stopping she looked around, and despite what Victor had said, she was awestruck by its size and beauty. The ceilings went up so high she had to lean back and strain her neck, looking up and up in amazement. How dramatically different the timber walls were from the paper thin walls of her house back in Japan. Stood there she went over the conversation in her head. Then she realized that Victor thought that this would be too small for her liking, but considering the house she had grown up in, this three-bedroom place was palatial in comparison. The footman carried her things up a staircase, down a hallway and just inside a door at the far end of the hall.
“Miss, this is to be your room,” he said. “You can rest in here, and I’ll send someone to take care of you. Master Victor has given us all instructions that we must take the best care of you, and you will be very comfortable here.”
Rena smiled at the footman and he bowed before leaving her alone in the bedroom she had entered. She glanced at the beautiful wood furniture, and the polished wooden floors covered with a cow hide rug. This room was almost as big as her old house and on the dresser was a bowl and jug of water. Quickly she washed away some of the dust and grime from her travel. This was home for now and she must make the best of it. In a mirror on the dresser, she reset her hair and then she turned. There was a large parcel on the foot of the bed, wrapped in brown paper and tied with string. It said Miss Rena on it in a small neat hand. She recognized it as Victor’s penmanship from the letters they had shared and the sign he had carried when picking her up from the ship. Slowly, she undid the knot of the string and unwrapped the package to find a large rectangular box.
Her excitement steadily mounted as she lifted the lid off the box to find more brown paper inside. She removed the soft bundle from within and unwrapped that too, to reveal a swath of white silk. She lifted it and it unfolded itself into the most beautiful dress Rena had ever laid eyes on. She gasped. The pure white silk dress was gathered into many folds at the bodice, and it smoothed out into a long skirt that ended near the floor. There were small glittering jewels sewn into the hem of the skirt and they sparkled brilliantly as she held the dress up to her little body.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” said a female voice from the doorway.
Rena spun around to find an elderly woman standing by the door, wearing a plain cotton dress covered by a frilly apron. There was a warm smile on her face and she immediately made Rena feel more welcome.
Rena nodded. “I’ve never…” she struggled to describe to this woman how this dress made her feel but gave up and nodded instead.
The woman entered. “I’m Elizabeth,” she said. “I’m supposed to help you get ready for this evening.”
Rena looked at the woman quizzically. “What’s happening in the evening?”
Elizabeth laughed incredulously. “Why, your wedding, of course!”
Chapter Five
Once Rena had got over her shock, she let Elizabeth help her. The woman was calming and competent. She explained about the dress and helped calm Rena’s nerves. Was she going to marry this man? It was what she had traveled so far for but he was not what she expected. He was cold and distant and once she was married there was no going back.
Elizabeth showed her the clothes in the wardrobe and explained that she would make any alterations needed and help her dress. “Mr. Victor has said you should stay in this room until you are ready,” she said.
Rena did not know what that meant. Was she to stay here all night? “What if not want wedding for a week?” she asked.
Elizabeth smiled and sat on the bed, she patted a space next to her and Rena sat down.
“You did come here to marry Mr. Victor?” Elizabeth asked.
Rena went over the words in her head and when she was sure what was meant she nodded. “But he not same,” she said.
Elizabeth nodded as if she understood. “He is nervous. He has looked forward to seeing you for so long. Give him a chance and you will see he is a good man. This room,” Elizabeth said and spread her hands to indicate. “This room is yours until you are ready to share Mr. Victor’s bed.” Elizabeth patted the bed.
Rena understood and she felt heat flush her cheeks. “I understand,” she said and she thought that it was a sweet gesture. May
be he was a nicer man than he seemed. Maybe if they got to know each other, all would be well.
“Are we going to get you dressed?” Elizabeth asked.
Rena did not know what to do. She had looked forward to this day with both dread and anticipation for so long. Now it was here she must trust Grandma Chie and accept her fate. She nodded.
Elizabeth helped her into the beautiful dress. First she put on the underskirts and stockings and then tied a bustle to her rear. Rena laughed it felt so funny and Elizabeth smiled at her and turned around to show she was wearing one also. It put Rena at ease and she let out a breath. This good woman would not work for Mr. Victor if he were not a good man. Then Elizabeth put the big white dress over her head. It felt so different, much looser than the tight fitting kimono until Elizabeth laced up the bodice. It seemed to squeeze the air from her lungs and she wondered why anyone would wear such a thing.
“All done,” Elizabeth said.
The soft skirts bushed out around her and Elizabeth steered her to a mirror.
Rena let out a gasp of delight. She barely recognized the girl in the mirror, the girl who looked like a princess she turned and smiled at Elizabeth. “Thank you,” she said.
“Now let me do your hair,” Elizabeth said.
Her thick, black and naturally straight hair was curled and clasped at one side with a turquoise encrusted comb. Elizabeth teased out a few tendrils, letting them hang loosely around her face, framing her high cheekbones and beautiful exotic eyes. Her lips were lightly tinted with beetroot juice and small pearls dangled from her ears. She stood up and admired the dress from all angles. It had been loose for her in the bodice and a little long but Elizabeth had expertly pinned the sides and the hem so that it fit her beautifully. The silk rippled as she moved and reflected the light as little rainbows broke out on the surface.
Elizabeth looked at her and swelled with pride. She had never before had the chance to help such a beautiful young woman prepare for her big day. “You made Victor so happy just by agreeing to marry him. I can’t imagine his joy when he finally has you as his lawfully wedded wife.”
Hearing Elizabeth say this made tears spring to Rena’s eyes, and tearfully, in broken English, she found herself telling Elizabeth how she had felt that Victor didn’t even care. Elizabeth listened patiently, and then, to Rena’s surprise, she laughed.
“Do not be silly. Victor is a very sensitive man. He isn’t proud, but his ego does get wounded quickly. I heard him talking. He thought you didn’t say anything because you wished for a mansion to live in and a line of servants as far as the eye can see. He thought you were dissapointed with this small house with just little old me to help.”
Rena shook her head so fast that her hair started to come undone. “I didn’t have the words. This house is so beautiful. Much more big than my house in Japan so small. But it doesn’t matter to me about house or servants. I want a husband and…” she hesitated, before adding, “and love.”
Elizabeth smiled at her. “See? You can be very expressive when you want. You don’t have to worry about any language barriers, as long as you try to let him know how you feel. I promise you he wants the same thing. Now, don’t cry, you’re spoiling your rouge, come, let me fix your hair up again.”
And as Elizabeth fussed with Rena’s hair and makeup, the young bride thought back to how Victor had quietly walked away when the carriage had stopped and realized that Elizabeth was right. He had misunderstood her silence and had been hurt.
Rena glanced at herself in the mirror again, and reality hit. She was getting married. This wasn’t something she could take lightly; she was going to enter into a binding commitment with a man for the rest of her life. She swore to herself that she would try harder to communicate with him. As she was thinking this, she suddenly remembered something her younger sister had said before Rena had left the country.
“Rena, always be honest with your husband,” she had said with tears prickling in her eyes. “We saw how Mother was always lying to Father because she wanted us to have our freedom and he wasn’t open-minded, but in doing so, Mother sacrificed her own happiness and marriage. Don’t let that happen to you.”
Rena bit her lip as she looked at herself in the white silk dress that was meant to symbolize purity and a fresh new beginning. What was the point of the dress and the wedding if Victor thought that she didn’t actually want to be here? And before she knew it, she was running out the door. Elizabeth started to run after her, but Rena spun around and shouted an apology. “I have to do something quick… I sorry… I’ll right back promise,” she said her voice fading as she ran further from the room, holding up her dress in her hands as her hair flew wildly behind her.
Elizabeth was stunned at first, but recovered soon, and chuckled softly to herself. She shook her head and thought Well, I’m the one who told her to be more expressive. She was fond of the girl already and knew Victor would be too. Still smiling to herself, she packed up the dyes and powders she had brought to beautify the young bride-to-be’s face and hummed as she left the room. On the way, she told the footman to wait by the carriage since she had a feeling that the young couple might end up running late for their own wedding.
***
Rena ran through the entire house looking for Victor. She could not find him downstairs so she went back up and after bursting into both of the other bedrooms and finding them empty, she ventured up to the rooftop to look for her bridegroom. She couldn’t find him anywhere, and she wondered if maybe she was too late. Maybe he had decided that he didn’t want to marry a girl as materialistic and worldly as he thought her to be since she hadn’t said anything to him in the carriage. What if he had called off the wedding, but nobody had informed her or Elizabeth? Would she be sent back to Japan? The thought may have comforted her while she was on the ship, but now it filled her with more sorrow than her tiny frame could hold. With tears in her eyes, she leaned over the railing of the rooftop and looked out towards the beautiful farmland. A green valley was surrounded by trees and behind that mountains rose into the distance. It was so secluded here and looking at it, she felt safe. If only she could stay and find the Victor that she had written to. If only…
Chapter Six
Victor reached the carriage and heard from the footman that the bride hadn’t shown up yet and that Elizabeth had warned them they might be late. He walked to the room where he knew Rena had been staying, and he knocked gently on the door. There was no answer, and with growing worry, he called out, “Rena? Elizabeth?” but still, nobody answered. He knocked again, and again, and then when he couldn’t wait any longer, he firmly held the doorknob and turned it. The door slowly swung open to reveal an empty room.
Shocked by this discovery, he ran frantically towards the kitchen. “Elizabeth? Elizabeth?” He shouted as he ran, and the old housekeeper came out, wiping her hands on her apron and looking mildly shocked at Victor’s uncharacteristic behavior.
“What happened? Where…” Victor doubled over and paused for breath.
Elizabeth finished his sentence for him, “Where is Rena? Is that what you want to ask? Why, she’s looking for you, Master Victor. She said she had something important to do before the wedding.”
Victor looked troubled, and a great panic seized him. Did Rena want to call off the wedding? He ran off without a word. He had to talk to her, for he believed he could give her what she wanted. The more he thought about the small exotic beauty, the more he wanted her to stay. From her letters they had so much in common, maybe he could explain and she would stay. One day he would be rich and maybe he could persuade her to wait for him. She couldn’t leave now could she? What would she do, sail back to Japan? He searched through the whole house and ended up on the rooftop, where a lithe figure stood leaning over the railing.
As he watched her standing there, the storm that had been brewing in his head suddenly became calm, and a strange quiet took over him. He looked at her, with her dark hair piled high on her head, exposing the ge
ntly swanlike curve of her neck. She was silhouetted against the setting sun, and it looked as though she were radiating streaks of gold, pink, and purple, sending the light off into the sky. Victor watched as the fading sunlight seemed to caress her delicate shoulders, her raven hair, and the beautiful dress she wore. She made a stunning bride, he thought with a lump in his throat.
He was unsure of what to do. Should he announce his presence on the rooftop and break this beautiful moment, or should he quietly retreat downstairs and wait for her to come down on her own? But his feet would not move so he simply stood there, watching her, as though frozen in that moment.
Then he noticed that her fragile shoulders were heaving, and he heard a soft sniffling before he realized that she was crying. Instinctively he stepped forward. He could not bear the thought that she was hurting. He had to do something, even if it meant losing this quiet peace he had suddenly found.
“Rena,” he said softly, moving a few steps forward, so she could see him.
She spun around, startled by the sound of his voice. Her face was streaked with tears, and in that instant, he had never thought her more beautiful. For a suspended moment, they both looked at each other in the dying glow of daylight. Everything faded away except the two of them, on that rooftop, gazing at each other. The moment stretched on as both their heartbeats quickened, until before he knew what was going on, Rena had thrown herself into his arms.
Victor held his young bride-to-be close to his chest, gently stroking her hair in silence until she looked up at him with tear-filled eyes. He swallowed nervously, because here he was, holding the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, and she was crying. “Rena, please don’t leave,” he said softly. “I know my ranch is not much, but I can make you happy. I promise that and one day I will be rich.”