When we arrived in the medical bay, we immediately discovered why no one else was ever woken up. One of the D.A.C.s had its lid propped open and the wires detached and dangling over the side. And sitting up next to the chamber on the floor was the decomposed body of the Chief Medical Officer, still unclothed as though the person never wasted any time leaving the room after waking. An empty syringe lay in her closed decayed hand and lying next to her on the floor were two empty vials of morphine.
Déjà vu
“Suicide?” I asked.
We both looked solemnly down at the broken woman.
“How could we judge her when we don’t know how deep she was into that dream world she was suddenly ripped away from?” Sarai asked, “What if she was fully engrossed and was living a life she loved more than anything?”
“Wow, and then she woke up cold and alone in this dead world,” I said, “And probably remembering more of the dream world than what she remembered of this one. I was a bit hazy still when I woke up.”
I couldn’t help but wonder just how bad something like that could feel. What if I never thought for a moment that the island was fake and then proceeded to live out decades perhaps with the woman I loved? And then what if I awoke to discover that Sarai wasn’t even real? There was still that hazy memory loss when I woke up, so I could have easily believed that in the first few moments.
“You probably discovered this same body… maybe multiple times,” Sarai said, “The computer on the bridge showed that you accessed that terminal more than a dozen times during the period that we were all supposedly sleeping. So you would have discovered that we had already arrived at our destination.”
“And I couldn’t wake anyone to get some help. I didn’t have the codes to access any of the chambers. Not even yours,” I said.
“So, without knowing that you would be starting over again in the dream world, you naturally decided to contact me by reinserting yourself. You must have thought you could tell me what was going on here on the ship and then you’d take me with you to the mine cart tunnel so that we could wake the rest of the crew,” she said, “But instead, your memory was wiped and your plane crashed into the ocean, only to start the cycle all over again.”
“You saved us, Sarai,” I said, putting my arm around her, “When you got fed up with me leaving and decided not to play along anymore, you saved us. How many more years would I have just kept doing the same thing?”
She turned to me and held me. I had to wonder if there was an island down there on the moon waiting for us. I could freely imagine living the rest of my life alone with her on that island. As long as it was real, of course. But alas, we had a lot of work to do before Earth started sending more people to this world.
“Let’s go wake up some people and see what’s down there,” she said.
BOOK TWO
Black Hole
Sarai
Chapter One
Message Incoming… Attention CP-4 Autopilot… Open override controls – accept access code CH48772PP344ZJP… Return to Earth immediately following the preprogrammed emergency abort course… reverse course using the emergency protocol instructions for momentum slowdown, turnabout, and acceleration procedures… Reason: CP-2 robotic lander reports conditions uninhabitable now on KMA.
“What exactly are we looking at, Commander?” Captain Murphy asked, staring at the same viewing panel we all were looking at.
The moon before us looked nothing like any of the three thousand-plus images we’d seen before we ever left Earth. It was almost like we were looking at Venus whereas the images we’d reviewed long ago presented us with a very earthlike planet.
“Lieutenant Grace believes we’re looking at a planet in the early stages of an ice age,” I said, using my pointer to highlight the debris field surrounding the moon, “Something struck the moon probably twenty or so years ago and it was pretty big judging by the ejecta spread in the area out here.”
“I’d like to add that if we do the math from the time that the failed override message was received and the time it took for CP-2’s original message to reach Earth; then to the time it took for Earth’s message to reach us at a point where we were already six light years into our journey... we are looking at a planet, or a moon actually, that was struck by a substantial meteorite some thirty-two and a half years ago,” Grace added.
While it was obvious that the captain was trying to conceal his distress, it remained evident in his face and posture that he was significantly upset. He stood there before the image of Kepler Moon Alpha with his arms crossed. Besides Captain Murphy and me, the only other people on the bridge were the Executive Colonization Officer Lieutenant Grace, the Chief Colonization Officer Commander McEwen, and the new Chief Medical Officer Lieutenant Jordan. The rest of the crew had been woken up ten hours ago, nearly a full day after the command crew aboard this ship was woken. I was the first to be woken, and curiously enough, it was because my husband Zane Stark and I had managed to wake ourselves from within the system-generated dream. Had we not, no one aboard the ship would have ever woken due to the efforts of a suicidal Chief Medical Officer. I, Commander Sarai Stark, was the executive officer, or XO of this ship. As the second in command, I would be required to have answers for the crew just as much as the captain would. And that crew had no idea that our destination didn’t turn out to be quite what we had expected, so currently twenty-nine people were busy loading and preparing the shuttlecraft that we might not even be using in the near future, if ever.
“Why didn’t the autopilot comply with the override commands from Earth?” I asked, hoping the captain found something that I hadn’t.
He turned his attention from the screen and looked down at the command control panel to his right. He tapped a few keys and then shook his head.
“The access code they used was correct and it was definitely received on the secure communications line. As near as I can tell, the central computer never forwarded the message to the autopilot and instead, treated it as a person-to-person communique which simply drops the message into an inbox where it sits dormant waiting to be read,” he said.
“It’s sad to think that we’d have already been back home a long time ago had the autopilot just reacted properly to the message,” Jordan said.
I sat down at one of the command terminals, checking the ship’s statistics. I’d already verified earlier that although we wasted ten extra years orbiting Kepler Moon Alpha while everyone slept unaware, the majority of the food supplies in deep freeze were still in good condition. Also, all the seeds and seed pods we brought along with us were still in good condition. The only thing we seemed to be dangerously low on was the actual fuel for the ship which included the remaining fuel inside the nuclear reactor.
At this point, I discovered that our oxygen production aboard the ship would only support us here in orbit for another ten to fifteen months. While that sounded like a long time, it was most certainly not enough time to make it back to Earth and it wouldn’t be enough time for us to sit up here and wait for the dust in the atmosphere below to settle. We should have considered ourselves lucky that thirty-two years have already passed, allowing a lot of the dust to settle already.
At least the atmosphere on KMA wasn’t as opaque as it probably was shortly after impact. Commander McEwen suggested that while a hundred percent of the sunlight, or Tau Ceti light, was probably blocked from reaching the surface in the first couple years after impact; by now there was a good possibility that about thirty or forty percent of the light was probably making it through to the surface. He was banking on the possibility that the penetrating UV could hopefully start something of a temporary greenhouse effect between now and the time all the dust settles. The amount of sunlight penetrating the atmosphere today was still considered an unacceptable number after several years of mostly sub-freezing surface temperatures followed by a period of nuclear winter. There would be no planting or farming, even if we consoled ourselves with the fact that it still provide
d us with breathable air and fresh water. Although after the impact event, we really didn’t know quite how fresh that water supply was.
Yeah, we could survive on KMA, especially in the equatorial region where temperatures were above freezing two-thirds of the day. But we would need to consider how we would sustain ourselves as a colony after the onboard food supplies ran out. That was why the two colonization officers and the medical officer found themselves up here on the bridge of the CP-4 at the moment.
“Is the CP-2 robotic lander still online or accessible?” Lieutenant Jordan asked.
Commander McEwen immediately shook his head.
“It used solar power to recharge its batteries,” the commander replied, “It probably shut down within a few months of impact.”
“Well, no matter what, we can’t stay up here,” I interrupted, “We’ve got less than a year before we suffocate. Assuming we could somehow keep the power going that long.”
“Power won’t be a problem,” the captain replied, “We’ve got two mini-reactors aboard that we were supposed to bring to the surface with us. We could always fire those up if need be.”
“But there’s no way to fix the oxygen problem, sir,” Jordan said, “Even if we cannibalized the EVA suits or borrowed from the shuttles’ oxygen generators, we’d buy ourselves weeks… maybe a month at best.”
“We’re simply going to have to go down there,” Grace said, “We already agreed that there were two potential sites in the equatorial region that showed signs of live vegetation. While we know that much of it would have died off, our scanners picked up definite signs of organic life, both in the oceans and on land. Basically, the moon wasn’t fully sterilized in the process, I’m pleased to report. And both of the suggested landing sites are near sources of fresh water as well.”
“So, we have no choice here. Am I understanding this correctly?” Captain Murphy asked.
The silence that followed was painful. Commander McEwen was staring at the moon with his arms crossed in front of him. The Captain had his hands in his pockets while he faced the ceiling with his eyes closed. He could very well have been praying. Lieutenant Grace could be heard pacing near the back of the room. Lieutenant Jordan appeared deep in thought as he massaged his chin. And I sat at one of the command panels staring at the statistics on the screen in front of me.
Commander McEwen finally broke the silence, “Although our shuttles were supposed to act as a temporary ground base until we built proper housing, that doesn’t mean they couldn’t act as a more permanent residence. It wouldn’t be hard to imagine us landing the four shuttles in such a way as to create the borders of a square, leaving a central commons area between all the shuttle-homes. We came prepared with the supplies necessary to build several greenhouses for food. We have-”
“Greenhouses?” the captain interrupted, “What good would that be without any sunlight?”
“There’s sunlight, sir,” Grace defended McEwen, “From the surface, it would always appear to be a dreary, hazy winter’s day… but a day nevertheless. Go back about ten or fifteen years and it would have been night time all the time, so it was a good thing we slept longer than we intended.”
“He’s correct, sir,” McEwen said, “And it’s within reason that in another ten years, we’ll actually be able to see Tau Ceti like a proper sun in our sky, albeit still a little hazy. Right now, it’ll be similar to the less foreboding grey skies of rainy summer’s day, which still feeds the plants with UV just fine. We’re not talking ‘thunderstorm-dark’ or ‘hurricane-dark’.”
“Well, how long until KMA is the planet we saw in all the pictures from the unmanned probes and robotic landers?” the captain asked.
“No glaciers except in the vicinity of the poles? Maybe a thousand years, sir,” Grace sounded abrupt and cold as he answered the captain, “But if you wanted to know how long until our landing site offered a more pleasant amount sunlight and better temperatures for farming – maybe even some swimming on the beaches… well, we honestly could see something like that in ten to twenty years. KMA isn’t a lost cause, sir. And let’s not forget the tidal forces that Kepler imposes on KMA. There’s plenty of geothermal heat just from this alone. It’s probably the only reason why we’re not seeing the sort of ice age we had on Earth.”
Captain Murphy turned to us, looking at the small government we represented. He seemed to be evaluating those he relied on most while pondering his next move. I was glad to see that he didn’t rise to Grace’s bitter reply.
“Let’s get the shuttles loaded up and make sure we don’t leave anything behind. There will be no return trips,” the captain said, “And I’m going to have to brief the whole crew. I don’t want them going down there with any misconceptions based on the images we had put our hopes in.”
Chapter Two
“So it’s not the place we came prepared for?” he asked, “Are you sure we arrived at the right planet or the right moon of Kepler?”
Zane and I were packing our clothing into the supply trunks that would be loaded later onto the shuttles. While the rest of the ship was getting the bad news in bulk during the ship-wide meeting with the captain, I decided to stay back and tell Zane in person. I had nothing to offer in Captain Murphy’s meeting anyway and besides, I didn’t want Zane to hear it from him first. It was bad enough that he was about to learn that I kept such information from him for more than a day anyway. Fortunately I married a man who respected the fact that I was often privy to things I couldn’t share with him.
“No, we arrived at the right place, but the weather is a bit worse than expected,” I replied, holding up yet another pair of shorts that I’d probably not be wearing for a decade or more, “We’re looking at Siberia down there and it’s going to be that way for the foreseeable future.”
“What are the odds that it would be hit with a meteor shortly after we discovered the little paradise?” he said, dropping a heap of clothing into his trunk without even folding it.
“Come on, Zane,” I said, reaching over and grabbing an armful of clothing from the trunk and putting it onto the bed, “Fold it nicely or it will get all wrinkly. Don’t you realize that we’re not going to have electricity right away? Ironing clothes will not be an option for a while.”
“Well, since I’m the one responsible for welding the plumbing for the reactor pool, I’d say I’m quite aware of the timeline for electricity,” he said, retrieving a shirt from the pile and folding it very animatedly.
“Zane,” I tugged his arm and turned him to me, “What are you doing?”
He cleared his throat like he was about to say something, but then simply shook his head. He set the partially folded shirt down onto the bed and frowned. I touched his cheek, causing him to look up at me.
“You wouldn’t understand, Sarai,” he said.
“Just say it,” I demanded.
He sighed, then blew out a long breath, “We just spent a long time together in a computer-generated dream world, the majority of which I don’t remember at all. The most recent dream… the one we escaped from…” he began, then simply shook his head again and started to fold another item of clothing.
“Go on,” I prodded, not sure where he was going with this.
“You and I were getting pretty close. I was discovering you for the first time ever, unaware of the life we already had outside of the dream. It brought me back to the worry-free, carefree, ‘nothing-else-matters’ days, like back when we first truly met in the shipyards. Remember?” he said.
I smiled and nodded, “Of course I remember how it was like back then. And I completely agree that it was really nice to be there again even if it was on an island of make-believe. To have such passion – like the early days of falling in love.”
“Well… you and I… well, we connected in the dream-world… intimately… but I don’t remember that because it never happened in the most recent dream we shared.”
“You’re upset that you don’t recall making love to that tanned, s
exy, shapely Sarai?” I chuckled, “You’re still jealous of the other Zanes?”
“Really, Sarai? We’ve been married for six years in the real world and you think that’s what’s bothering me?”
“Then what is it?” I asked, confused all of a sudden.
“I wanted you more than anything while we were in that final dream,” he said, “And I still remembered how I felt about you when I woke up in the Delayed Aging Chamber. I still remembered how I felt about you when I helped you out of your chamber. Nothing changed about my feelings for you as I assisted you back to the room, helped you to clean up, and then when we got dressed. That first night here when you discovered that your pajamas were too loose, I still thought you looked nice. When you complained the next day that your legs were bony and pale, I still wondered how it would be like for me to caress them. When you complained this morning that your hair wasn’t as silky as it was in the dream world, I wondered what it would be like to run my fingers through it. When you-”
I had to kiss him in that moment. I kissed him hard, reaching behind his head and holding his lips to mine. I had neglected him completely ever since we woke up on the ship. The worries of the ship, the crew, and our future lives on KMA had blinded me to the man I loved and had loved for decades. He only loved me for the six years he remembered, but I had loved him for more than twenty years when you counted the lives we lived in the dream world – lives that I had memories of.
He tugged my loose-fitting uniform from my body and lowered me onto the bed, kissing me like I was still that perfect woman from the dream. He kissed me and touched me as though I wasn’t the skeletal woman who stared back at me from the mirror. His lips and tongue traced my body as though he loved me in the same way he had always loved me. Zane had never changed and what he saw when he looked at me had never changed. It was me who changed. Zane had never stopped seeing me for who I was, the same way I still saw him for who he always was. The only problem was that I stopped seeing myself the way he saw me. Zane loved me and he always loved me passionately.
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