She had no chance to wonder at his words, his lips seizing upon a swollen, aching nipple making her cry out, his tongue swirling around and around and then flicking at her with a mastery of equal parts torment and sweet ecstasy. Her fingers funneling into his burnished hair, still damp from his bath, she closed her eyes, never dreaming, never knowing, such pleasure could exist. But she flared them open in surprise when she felt Jared’s fingers enmesh in her woman’s curls, then slip into her body and tease a secret, hidden place that already throbbed and tingled.
“Jared…”
“Shhh, Lindsay, shhh.” His lips molded to hers, his tongue delved wildly into her mouth and she surrendered to the passion of his kiss just as she gave herself over to the sensual agony of his fingers slowly circling her. Circling and venturing ever deeper only to slide out again until she felt wet and flushed and utterly weak with desire.
Her hands fluttering to his stomach, she splayed her fingers against his taut, masculine flesh, the impassioned recesses of her mind overtaken by an instinctive yearning to touch him, too. And she did touch him, her palm grazing something silken and hard, her fingers closing around him even as Jared started and groaned raggedly against her mouth.
“Woman… no, enough!”
She did not heed him, would not allow herself to, sensing as he groaned again, like a dawning upon her as old as time, the potential of her feminine power to please him. And she wanted to please him so desperately, her hand slipping lower. Crisp, springy curls entangled around her fingers, his flesh grown even harder and throbbing against her palm
“Damnation, woman, will you be the end of me?”
His voice thick and hoarse, Jared dragged her arms above her head so suddenly that Lindsay gasped, a mounting wildness in him now as he clasped her wrists with one hand and caressed her body with the other, his touch first teasing, then almost fierce until she writhed and squirmed and moaned beneath him. Again his mouth found a hardened nipple and he suckled ravenously, only to trail a brazen path to the other breast, back and forth until she was panting and whimpering, her body shaking just as he shook, their desire a raging tempest more frenzied than any storm.
She felt him part her legs with his knee and of her own accord she widened them for him, opening herself for him, not knowing why but sensing the timeless answer when his full weight settled upon her and a hard ridge of flesh swelled at the aching heart of her thighs. She heard him whisper her name, heard him whisper he might cause her pain, but only for an instant, and then he thrust himself inside her, so deeply that she cried out… tears stinging her eyes not because he had hurt her, but because at last, finally, she felt whole.
“Lindsay, I’m sorry. Forgive me…” he said raggedly against her ear.
She threw her arms around his neck to reassure him; she caressed the ravaged flesh on his back and powerful shoulders as he sank again and again into her body, his breathing coming harder, faster. She rose to meet him, lifting herself to him, craving more of him, all of him, her throat constricting and tears streaming down her face as she held with all her might onto the man she loved.
Just as Jared held onto her, the terrible darkness gone, blazing light overwhelming him as he shuddered and spilled himself into the wet, engulfing heat of her body, clutching Lindsay to his heart as she moaned wildly and found her climax beneath him.
Long moments later, he still held her, caressing the damp hair away from her tear-stained face, a wave of such fierce possession gripping him that he doubted he could ever let her go.
And when she finally opened her eyes and snuggled against him, his body growing hard and urgent for her once more, he told himself that at least for this one precious night, he would pretend that they would never be apart.
Chapter 28
“Lindsay, are you awake?”
Jared’s low query thrilling her, Lindsay didn’t move, didn’t flutter an eyelash, wanting simply to lie there for another glorious moment and listen to his steady heartbeat against her ear and the sounds of the wharf coming to life outside their window.
She had never known such contentment. She felt utterly, completely, his from head to toe, every inch of her body caressed by him, kissed by him, in ways she could never have imagined between man and woman. And the last time, when he had taken her from behind, his hands moving wildly over her body as if he couldn’t touch enough of her at once, she had never known such a sense of consummate possession. Even now it made her cheeks flare hot to think…
“Woman, I know you’re awake. Unless you’re blushing in your sleep, which isn’t likely.”
She couldn’t help smiling, nuzzling closer to him even as he rolled her gently onto her back and brought himself above her, staring into her eyes. She stared back as he smiled, too; she was so filled with love for this man, so filled with hope for their future. Surely now things would work out between them, they had to—
“Don’t you think it’s time we dressed? I’m sure my men are wondering…”
Jared didn’t finish the thought, but he hadn’t needed to. Lindsay blushed even hotter, although she shook her head, winding her arms around his neck.
“No, I don’t want to get dressed. Not yet, Jared.”
“Not yet?”
She shivered at the way he looked at her, shivered even more when he shifted his full weight upon her, his smile gone now, intense heat burning in his eyes. She drew in her breath sharply when she felt the hardness of his flesh nudge her softness, her thighs opening to him unbidden as Jared lifted himself slightly and then sank easily into her, her body already wet and eager for him.
As he thrust deeper, yet so slowly she thought she might scream for wanting him fully inside her, he dragged her arms from around his neck and enmeshed his fingers with hers, pushing her hands into the pillow. And still he stared at her as he possessed her, his eyes never leaving hers, not even when his breathing grew unsteady and his lean hips thrust ever faster against hers.
She felt her sudden climax coming upon her like a cresting wave pulling her under deep water, felt Jared grow rigid just as she did, her breath gone, her gaze held captive by his, until they were both lost to the sweet agony of their bodies throbbing together, finding release together.
And still he watched her as if he wanted to see, wanted to know fully, the effect of his possession upon her, his eyes as intent as she’d ever seen them. As if he wanted to burn upon his brain the sight of her surrendering to the ecstasy they brought each other. Lindsay finally closed her eyes, the aching, heart-stopping sensations simply too much.
When she finally opened her eyes, Jared had become quiet except for his flesh still throbbing inside her, and she wondered as wanton heat raced to her toes if he might be growing ready for her again. She knew she would never know enough of him, never feel sated, and a slow smile came over his face as if he’d read her mind. Yet it held a strange hint of sadness, too, and she felt a niggling of unease.
“Jared? What is it?”
“Nothing. Just that the morning has come. It’s time you and I were dressed.”
He withdrew from her and then was gone from the bed, Lindsay never having felt so bereft as she watched him retrieve his breeches from a chair near the tub. He was so magnificent to look upon, so beautiful, that her throat became tight, her breasts, her body still yearning for him. She blushed hotly at her brazenness, but she left the bed and ran to him just as he turned to fasten his breeches.
“No, no, it’s not morning, it can’t be,” she said, throwing her arms around him. “And if it is, then let’s pretend it’s not, Jared—”
“Woman, I’d like nothing more,” he said so huskily she thought for a moment she had swayed him, his arms going around her to hold her tight. He hugged her so fiercely that for a moment she couldn’t breathe, but why did she need air if she could forever be a captive in his arms? Yet all too suddenly he began to release her, although she clung to him, not wanting him to let her go. “Lindsay, how can I hope to find a vicar in this city if
you won’t allow me to dress?”
She froze, her mouth dropping open, so stunned she simply stared up at him.
“Yes, a vicar,” he repeated, giving her a sound slap on her bare bottom, then gently pulling her arms from around his neck. “And he’ll be shocked indeed if he arrives to perform our wedding and finds you looking like anything but a blushing bride. Now, shall we dress?”
Lindsay glanced down at herself, overcome as much by shock at what he’d announced as by the joy suddenly flooding her, tears of elation jumping to her eyes. She felt so flustered—light-headed, too—not knowing what to do first, that Jared took pity on her and swept up the towel he’d tossed to the floor last night and wrapped it around her, knotting the thick cloth at her breasts.
“This will do for clothing until you have a chance to bathe. I’ll have the proprietor send up some hot water for you.”
Lindsay was still so astonished, she didn’t notice that Jared had grown tense; she ran to the bed to shake out, one by one, her muslin gown and her underclothes. The garments were a bit crumpled, but she had no others— Oh, Lord, could it really be true?
She turned to look at Jared, but he was already dressed, fastening the last button on his ivory shirt and then thrusting his pistol into his belt. He didn’t glance at her but strode to the door, his impatience to be on his way overwhelming her. He couldn’t seem to wait for her to become his bride. His bride!
“Jared, wait!” She flew to him, the sudden warmth in his eyes overwhelming her, too; she’d never known such happiness, and she threw her arms around his neck. “Oh, Jared, I knew it would only take some time before you realized you loved me, too. I can’t believe we’re to be married! It’s all I’ve ever wanted!”
He didn’t answer and she didn’t see the flicker of pain across his face as he bent his head to kiss her. Kiss her for so brief a moment, she already missed him desperately before he’d even walked out the door, and after he had, she could only stand there, listening to his footfalls retreating down the steps.
Only when they had faded did she allow herself such a whoop of pure joy, she was certain the entire city of Gijón had heard her.
***
Lindsay had bathed, dressed and been pacing excitedly for what seemed like hours, even staring out the window at the bustling waterfront unable to divert her, when she finally heard footsteps returning. She flung open the door, her disappointment so keen when she found the portly proprietor in the hall and not Jared that the poor man was clearly embarrassed.
“Señorita, come. El Capitàn is downstairs— Señorita?”
She had flown past him so suddenly, but she couldn’t help herself, so near to bursting was she to see Jared again. And he was waiting for her in the main room of the tavern, a balding, bleary-eyed Englishman standing beside him who appeared even less a vicar than she was a blushing bride. Her face aflame as she remembered Jared’s words, she knew she didn’t care that the wedding was coming after…
The memory of Jared’s recent possession of her as vivid as that his intense gaze now held hers, she swallowed at her sudden nervousness, taking his outstretched hand.
“Lindsay, the Reverend Charles Standish.”
“Dee-lighted, my dear.” The man hiccupped before Lindsay could utter a word, clearly well into his cups even at this early time of the day. “What a fine day for a wedding, haven’t performed one since I left England ages ago, but better to be living among the Spaniards than deported, I always say— Oops, excuse me.”
The drunken fellow had practically reeled into her, reeking so foully of rum that Lindsay wrinkled her nose and glanced doubtfully at Jared. She noticed then that he was anything but smiling, probably as dismayed by the man who would perform the sacred ceremony as was she, so to reassure him, she summoned her brightest smile.
“If he can say the words, what else matters?” she whispered in a cheerful aside, glad to see, as she looped her arm through Jared’s, that the vicar pulled a prayer book from his pocket, at least having come prepared.
“Do we—have witnesses?” the reverend demanded loudly, another hiccup bursting from his throat.
As if prearranged, the portly proprietor stepped forward, already mopping his eyes with his handkerchief, while two early-bird patrons in no better condition than the vicar lurched out of their chairs. But Lindsay could have been standing in the loftiest church for all she noticed, her gaze upon Jared, her heart overflowing.
He said his vows so soberly, his eyes never leaving hers, while she could barely speak at all, and before it seemed she could blink, the vicar shut the prayer book with a thud and dropped it back into his pocket, the ceremony done. She must have looked startled; in the next instant Jared drew her against him to seal their marriage with a kiss so stirring, she was aware of nothing any longer but the impassioned warmth of his lips upon hers.
Yet just as quickly he released her and took her by the hand, leading her from the tavern while their motley witnesses sank back into their chairs and the vicar demanded a drink from the proprietor, who snuffled into his handkerchief and went back to his work. Lindsay blinked at the blinding sunlight outside, a bit ashamed of herself for thinking she and Jared might retire at once to their room.
Of course, he must have something special planned; perhaps he’d somehow gotten the word to Cooky aboard the Vengeance to prepare a wedding breakfast. He seemed preoccupied as they walked along the busy wharf, and they were moving away from his ship, which made her wonder, but nothing could daunt her joy. She and Jared were husband and wife! At last her dreams had come true—
“Lindsay.”
Jared had stopped, his voice oddly somber as he pulled her out of the way of bustling passengers boarding a brig lying at anchor alongside the dock, Lindsay glancing from the commotion to his face. And she sensed then, from the dark turbulence in his eyes, that there was no wedding breakfast in store, her heart plummeting like a stone into her shoes.
“We must part now, Lindsay. Everything’s arranged. This ship is bound for London, a Swedish neutral, so you’ll be safe. I’ve paid for your passage, and you should be home within a week—”
“No.” She had barely whispered, so stunned, so stricken that she could say no more, staring in shock at Jared. She glanced at the ship, which was preparing to sail, and clutched all the more tightly to Jared’s arm. “No—”
“And I say, woman, that you will go. You will return to England and take your place as the Countess of Dovercourt. You’ll not want for anything—a house, money, servants—and there you will be safe. Do you hear me? I’ve a man there, Simon Tuft, a good man whom I trust, and he knows of Sylvia and Ryland Potter. If they would ever dare to show their faces at Dovercourt Manor, Simon has orders what to do—”
“But what of you?” she blurted out, somehow finding her voice, although her throat was so tight she could scarcely breathe. “I don’t want a house or money or servants, Jared, only you! Your love is all I want, all I need—”
“And I told you before, Lindsay, I’ve no love to give you.”
“But we—you married me!”
“Only to spare your reputation when you return to England. No matter what story you concoct about your disappearance, people will always wonder—especially if you find yourself with child. At least now you have a husband” —he reached into his belt and pulled out a piece of folded vellum— “and what I trust will pass for a proper license to prove you’re Lady Giles, the Countess of Dovercourt.”
“No.” Lindsay numbly shook her head, refusing to believe him, refusing to take the license, but he forced it into her hand.
“Damnation, listen to me, Lindsay! If it ever becomes known who I am, you must fashion the biggest story of your life and swear you never knew anything about my being the Phoenix, do you understand? You were just as fooled as everyone else.”
He shoved her then toward the gangplank, Lindsay so sick at heart that her legs would scarcely move, while Jared felt as if he were dying inside. But, dammit, he had t
o make her go! He had to!
If he somehow got back to England, he would make amends to her, but at least this way she would be safe. There were too many ships looking for him, even this short stay in Gijón of imminent risk, and he planned for the Vengeance to sail at dark no matter if all the repairs hadn’t been made. But for now, if he must hurt her to get her to go…
“Jared, please, no! Let me stay with you!”
She had cried out so desperately that sailors and passengers alike were beginning to stare, forcing Jared to be cruel.
“Woman, I’ve given you everything I can. For once, look at life as it is and to hell with your fantasies!”
He could have stabbed her through the heart, she grew so deathly white, stumbling up the gangplank. It was all he could do not to grab her back, to seize her in his arms and tell her how much he cared. Yet he would no more allow himself to do that than to abandon the vengeful path he had chosen for himself, a path too perilous to share with the woman he loved and would do anything to protect.
Unable to bear the stricken weight of her gaze upon him as she clutched at the railing above, a command going out to drop the gangplank and unfurl the sails, he turned his back on the ship and strode away.
“Good-bye, Lindsay.”
His hoarse whisper lost to the noise and bustle of the wharf, he didn’t need his eyes burning to know that leaving her was truly the hardest thing he had ever done.
Chapter 29
Lindsay stared at Jared’s retreating back until she couldn’t see him anymore. The wharf was so crowded, and even then she searched wildly for his dark blond head. But he was gone, though his words still rang in her ears—brutal words that had cut her to the quick and filled her with unimaginable despair.
It was true. He would never love her. He had room in his heart only for revenge. Maybe, just as he’d said, he had given her everything he could…
Man of My Dreams Boxed Set Page 54