by Nashoda Rose
She sighed. “Sweetie, are you sure you want to dig up the past? You know, your mind might be trying to protect you against what happened.”
“I need to know.” I spoke louder than intended and the two women at the nursing station raised their heads and frowned. “Sorry. Listen, I’ve met this guy and he kind of brings back memories.” I took out a sketch of Balen and passed it to her. “Do you recall seeing him around at all?”
“No. No, definitely not, and I think I’d remember such a handsome young man.” She passed the paper back. “You don’t think he’s the man who abducted you, do you?”
I shook my head. “No, he didn’t hurt me, but can you tell me anything about my condition that may help me remember.”
“Well . . .” She tapped her pen to her temple. “The punctures and bruises on your neck were odd. But the doctor said the marks were probably from a ring your assaulter wore. You did have bruising and cuts around your wrists and ankles like you were . . .”
“Tied down?”
She nodded. “And your red blood cell count was really low, yet you had no significant bleeding to explain why. We had to give you a transfusion. You were an unusual case. I guess that’s why I remember you so clearly.”
I rubbed my wrists, thinking of the bruising the doctor believed were from manacles.
“My dear, I’m sorry I can’t be of much help.”
I smiled. “Well, I appreciate your time.” I passed the nurse a card from my gallery. “If you think of anything, can you call me?”
“Of course. Keep your chin up. And say hi to Abby for me. What a doll. So concerned and caring. A friend like her is hard to find.”
“Abby?” I didn’t have any friends by the name of Abby.
“I believe that was her name. I recall the morning quite clearly. I was just getting off my shift when she came into emergency calling for help. She had you in her car. Sweetie, don’t you remember her? She said she was a good friend of yours, and you were conscious. You were talking to her. It was like you knew her. I’m not sure why you wouldn’t remember that.”
“No, I don’t know anyone named Abby.”
“You don’t remember leaving the hospital?”
“What? No.”
“You left in the middle of the night. I don’t know how you managed to slip past those on duty, but one minute you were lying in bed and the next—gone. It was only an hour or so before Abby brought you back. You were no longer on morphine. I thought you’d remembered that.” She crinkled her long, thin brows together. “When you came back, you had a cut on your neck that wasn’t there before. Abby couldn’t say how you came by it, only that you’d called her and she picked you up wandering on the street. She was so concerned, fussing over you. She had you wrapped up in her coat. You were shivering like a leaf.” She hesitated, taking my hand and squeezing. “Are you seeing anyone, child? I mean, maybe if you had someone to talk to . . . I could suggest—”
“What did she look like? Did she give a last name, her phone number, anything?”
“No, just Abby. She had red hair and a petite frame. Pale face, wearing all that black. Such a beautiful girl to be wearing all black.”
I was at a dead end. All the police had was my abductor’s DNA taken from beneath my fingernails. But without him in their system, they had nothing.
“Abby did mention another name in passing. Annie or Ansley. No, it was more unusual. I think it was . . .”
“Anstice.” I didn’t wait for her confirmation as I ran from the hospital.
I headed straight to Anstice and Keir’s, handling my Mini like the car had been built to be driven, and the engine purred with glee at being able to strut its stuff. I made it in record time without another speeding ticket to add to my collection.
“Who’s Abby?” I said as soon as Anstice opened the door. I pushed past her and took a quick scan of the foyer, relieved we were alone.
When I turned around, Anstice had her hand on the wall supporting her weight, and her face had gone white.
“You know her? You fucking know her?” Un-fucking-believable. I’d hoped the nurse had been wrong, that Anstice hadn’t been hiding something from me. “Who is she?”
“Danni . . . Danielle, I . . .”
“Babe, what is it? I heard the . . .” Keir stood at the top of the stairs and I sagged a little because when Keir became involved it was like fighting a rhino. “Danielle,” he said. And he called me Danielle. Not good. He was already on the offensive. He came down the stairs and wrapped his arm around Anstice’s waist like a protective shield. “What’s this about?”
“Don’t give me that bull. You know damn well what I’m talking about. Abby? Who is she?”
Anstice looked up at her husband with pleading eyes, her fingers curled in his shirt. He remained stoic, unblinking as he met my eyes head-on.
“Leave it alone, Danni.” Keir’s tone was abrupt with a warning edge to it.
“Piss off, Keir. Anstice knows an Abby. An Abby who was at the hospital with me.” I ignored Keir’s glare and looked at Anstice, who was having difficulty meeting my eyes. “Anstice?”
“I . . . I . . . oh, God, Danni, please, I can’t . . .”
I gripped the banister for support, my fingernails penetrating the wood, as anger surged. “I can’t believe you’re going to stand there and pretend you don’t know anything. So much for best friends. I guess now that you have your little family here, you don’t need a friend who is all fucked up. Well, screw you. I’ll find out for myself.”
Anstice reached out to me and I jerked away. “Danni, please. You can’t go searching for answers even the police can’t find. It’s too dangerous. Come sit down—”
“Who is Abby?” I stood my ground.
When Anstice and Keir remained silent, I whirled around to leave.
Keir grabbed my arm, stopping me. “Anstice is trying to protect you, not hurt you.”
I raised my fist and went to punch him in the face, but he blocked me with his palm. “Fuck you, Keir. I’m the one hurting, and, obviously, you both can help, but you’ve chosen to let me suffer in hell.”
“Danni. Please,” Anstice pleaded.
I ignored her and went out the front door. They knew who Abby was and yet they refused to tell me? What was going on? Who were they protecting? It sure as hell wasn’t me.
I got in my car and drove down the road, parked beneath a large pine tree, and then put on my hat, gloves, and scarf and walked back to Keir’s.
If they contacted Abby, it would be tonight. No way was I going to let this opportunity slip from my grasp like everything else had. They knew more about my abduction than they were letting on, and I was going to find out what, even if I had to sit out in the freezing cold all bloody night.
I paced the alley like a caged panther, every so often stopping to search for her scent. Nothing. Three fuckin’ hours and nothing.
Coldness seeped into my veins and it wasn’t from the near-freezing temperature. The possessive feeling was mounting by the day; an uncontainable protectiveness I had no right to feel.
I’d fought the need to see her again. I’d spent days in some shit motel in darkness, trying to get her out of my mind. I couldn’t do it. The need was more powerful than me, and yet, seeing her again had only brought more pain to both of us.
I kicked a stray plastic bag and the wind picked it up, twirled it in the air, and then dropped to the ground again as the wind died down. It was like me. I was losing my footing with her when I’d always had complete control.
And now I had to leave her and turn myself into the Deaconry.
I deserved whatever punishment they decided. Loyalty. Honesty. Allegiance. All had been drilled into my head since I was a kid. Then, with a few words, I’d betrayed my own blood. Some fuckin’ allegiance.
And the worst of it, I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
I’d trade the location of my sister to the vampire Ryszard in exchange for Danni’s freedom. I should’ve found anoth
er way, fought harder, done more. Except the conclusion was always the same—Danni would’ve become Ryszard’s slave if I hadn’t made the deal.
Now I’d stand before the Deaconry to face my punishment. And I was okay with that. I accepted it. What I didn’t accept was leaving Danni alone without the protection of the Scars. They had to bring her in. But I knew the rules—no humans can know about them.
I slammed my fists into the metal recycle bin and the sound vibrated through the alley. “Fuck.”
I SHIFTED ON THE tree branch, trying to get feeling back in my butt. It had been hours, and the only movement at the house was Jedrik’s BMW leaving. Being Jedrik and this late at night, it was probably a booty call.
I was high enough to see over the massive stone wall and still hidden by the few oak leaves that refused to give way despite the early winter winds. Like me, barely hanging on, waiting for that one gust of wind that would break my hold on sanity and send me crashing to the ground.
The front door opened.
I leaned forward as a guy I didn’t recognize walked out. He was taller than Keir and broader. Even from this distance, he looked intimidating from the way he stood confidently in the doorway. He hesitated on the second step and I saw him tilt his head to the side as if listening for something. Suddenly, his head jerked in my direction and his eyes flashed a bright golden color.
“Shit.”
I scrambled down the tree as fast as I could. Keir finding out I was spying on them was not something I wanted to stick around for. And I certainly didn’t want that guy coming after me. Keir had some seriously scary-ass friends.
I yelped when I grabbed hold of a sharp broken branch and it dug into my palm. I teetered for a second and reached for another, but my balance was already off and I skidded through the branches until my abdomen hit hard, breaking my fall. I managed to hook my arms over the limb as my feet dangled.
“Jesus, Danni.”
“What the—” I lost my grip and fell the rest of the way, making a loud oof when my back hit a branch as I tumbled.
I braced for the hard, cold ground. What I got was hard, but warm as hell.
I instinctively hooked my arms around his neck as he held me. “What the fuck are you doing?”
Balen’s furious tone cut through my shock and I struggled in his arms, shoving at his chest. “Put me down.”
The green in his eyes dissipated and they shaded black as he glared at me. For a second, I thought he was going to ignore me as his arms tightened. He slowly let me slip from his arms, but his hand remained locked on my wrist and he was so close it was as if he was on top of me with his towering height.
“Get off me.” I tried to tear from his grip, but he refused to budge.
“I’m not on you and if I was . . . you’d sure as fuck know it.”
My stomach cartwheeled and my sex clenched as I imagined him on top of me. I gritted my teeth as unwanted desire rose and I had no way to stop it.
“Why are you here?” I tried again to dislodge his hold, but Balen was strong as hell and currently pissed off, although he had no right to be. I was the one pissed off that my friends were hiding shit from me. “Are you following me? Stalking me?”
He remained silent, but I noticed the twitch in his cheek and his lips pursed together harder.
“What? Suddenly mute?”
He tilted his head down and tugged me closer so his mouth was inches from mine. “I saw your car parked on the street and decided to look for you. Good thing, too, otherwise your ass would be pretty damn sore right now.”
My lips parted as my heart raced and tingles sprinkled my skin. All I could think about was him slamming me back into the tree and fucking me when I should be freaked out that this guy was stalking me. I narrowed my eyes and curled my hands into fists. “That’s a bullshit answer and you know it.”
“Fuck, Danni. You don’t get it. Wasn’t the asshole at the bar enough?” He abruptly let me go and ran his hand through his hair. “I warned you to be careful and then I find you in the middle of the night sitting in a fuckin’ tree.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “I don’t need a babysitter and I sure as hell don’t need a stalker. I gave you a chance to explain what happened. You walked away . . . sorry, I mean ran away. So, stay the hell away from me.”
He shook his head and it dropped forward as he said in a ragged tone, “I can’t. I fuckin’ can’t.”
My mouth dropped open as a range of emotions shot through me all at the same time. I didn’t know what to say. It was so fucked up. This was fucked up. My life was quickly crumbling into a mess of broken puzzle pieces and I felt as if I was jamming them together and they wouldn’t fit.
Except Balen. He fit. Everything about him was wrong and yet it felt right and that was so messed up. But he was holding shit back from me just like Anstice, and I was sick of it. “I don’t need you or anyone else fucking up my life.” I turned to leave when his arm hooked around my waist, pulling me back to land up against his chest. Common sense told me to fight him, but when his eyes softened and he cupped my chin, his thumb caressed back and forth, all my resolve went shooting out the top of my head.
Balen nodded toward the house. “Why are you sitting in a tree watching that house, little one?”
How was I supposed to act nonchalant when all I could think about were those lips moving closer so they’d press against mine? I’d never felt so . . . sexually aware of a man in my life. It was a need so strong that I was fighting against myself constantly. Was this how my father felt about my mother? Out of control. Insane with need.
I never wanted that. Never wanted to be that weak and vulnerable.
What I wanted . . . no, what I needed was for him to leave. “My friends live there and they’re hiding something from me. Satisfied?”
Suddenly, his body stiffened and his head jerked toward the house. “We need to leave—now.”
Before I could protest, he locked his hand in mine and took off down the street, pulling me along beside him. “Balen?”
He didn’t say anything, but I felt the tension in him and one glance at his face sent a tidal wave of fear to crash into me. His jaw was tight, eyes narrowed and there was no softness in his eyes.
“Keys?” He held out his hand when we reached my car.
I made no move to give them to him, and it was more a hesitation because I was thinking about whether or not I should let him get in my car.
“We don’t fuckin’ have time for whatever is playing with your head right now.” He grabbed me and began searching my coat pockets. I kicked out and tried to pull away, but it was like I was this little pathetic mouse under a cat’s paw.
The keys clanged when he pulled them from my pocket then he unlocked the car and threw open the passenger door. “Get in.”
I was going to fight him, but something in his expression made me think arguing with him at the moment was not a good idea nor would it do me any good.
I got in and he walked around the front of the car and folded into the driver’s seat. He didn’t say anything as he started the car and took off, the tires skidding on the pavement.
I lasted a few minutes before I started in on him. He looked a little more . . . calm, the tightness between his brows was gone and he was no longer jamming the gear shift.
“Who were we running from?”
“No one.” He kept his eyes forward, but I noticed his hand curled around the steering wheel tighten.
“If it was no one, then why did we run like a herd of rhinos were after us?”
He half laughed, half snorted and the corners of his lips curved up. He looked cute when he did that. No . . . it wasn’t cute; Balen didn’t have cute in him. The guy was too scary for cute. He was all hotness. Maybe he’d seen the guy I had before I fell out of the tree. “Did you see someone?”
“No. I need to think and I can’t think with you asking questions.”
“What?” Was he serious?
He glanced over at me a
nd any hint of laughter I’d seen moments ago was gone. But he didn’t look angry, he looked worried. His brows were drawn low over his eyes and his hand on the gear shift rubbed back and forth.
“Okay.” He needed a minute, I got that and if that guy I saw coming out of Anstice’s house had been coming for us, Balen had just saved my ass—again.
We drove in silence and I opened my mouth several times to say something then clamped it shut again and stared out the side window.
He pulled into the parking garage and I pointed to my spot. He careened in and shut off the ignition. “Someone was watching us and no, I didn’t see him,” he said and then got out of the car.
I quickly followed and said over the hood of the car, “So you smelled him? No deodorant kind of thing or too much cologne?”
He was already walking away. “Something like that.”
I jogged after him and heard the beep as he pressed the key to lock my doors. “Which one? Because I sure as hell didn’t smell anything.”
We came out of the garage onto the street and he slipped his hand in mine. I jerked back, but he held firm and continued walking.
“You have control issues,” I muttered.
He chuckled and the raspy, deep sound sent baby sparks through me. Stupid girl hormones.
He stopped at my door, let me go, and then passed me the keys. “Where’s the Telwar I gave you?”
“What?”
“The knife. Do you have it with you?”
“Of course not. I’m not carrying around a knife—”
He sighed. “God, you’re stubborn.”
“No, I’m sane. Who carries around a knife except criminals?”
“People who want to live.” Wow, he was paranoid. “I’m leaving tomorrow and I need you to be careful. I need you to keep the knife on you at all times and . . .” I opened my mouth and he pressed his finger to it. “No more hiding in trees at night. It would be even better if you didn’t go out after dark.”