He opens the door and I push it closed. “Why did you tell me all that?”
“I haven’t been fair to you. I know I come across like a jerk, but you bring that out of me. If it helps, you should know that usually only happens when I like someone.”
His walls are down, and I think I might actually be seeing the real Roman for once. He stuffs his hands in his pockets and waits uncomfortably for a response.
I’m not sure what comes over me. Maybe it’s the softness in his eyes that I didn’t see before. Maybe it’s the way his voice calms and excites me all at once, or maybe it’s the way he’s looking through me. Without thinking, and acting purely on emotion, which I never allow, I lift on my toes, and press my lips to his.
As soon as we touch, I realize what I’m doing and with whom. The color drains from my face, and I open my eyes. He’s staring at me, completely dumbfounded. He hasn’t moved a muscle.
“Fuck me,” I say, pulling back.
“Is that an interjection or an invitation?”
I choose to ignore it purely out of embarrassment. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I did that.”
“It’s okay,” he says in a soothing tone.
I know I’ve crossed a line. “I’ve never ever been so unprofessional in my life. I am so sorry. I swear to you it will never happen again.” I make an X over my heart for emphasis.
He licks his lips. “It happens all the time.”
Great. Now he thinks I’m a groupie. I shake my head and open the door.
“Wait! That’s not what I meant,” he says as I leave.
I am the biggest idiot in the history of idiots. I will never ever be able to look at him, or myself, again.
I am a raging moron. The woman who’s been the star of my dreams kissed me and I froze. I never freeze. Hadn’t I been staring at her mouth the entire time she spoke?
Somehow I remain professional through the rest of the questions, even when Kari gets a little flirty. Her question about the type of woman that turns me on threw me off. I manage to not describe Reed, even though I want to use her as my example. Bobby impresses me with his out-of-the-box question regarding people I’ve cut from my life and why. No one goes too far and I’m able to tell them only what I want them to know. That’s how I roll.
JP watches my sessions and I’m viewing his from the comfort of my dressing room. Esto, Dawson, and JP came up with the questions for the first challenge. There was something each person in the tent knew about me they were supposed to find out. The person with the fewest correct answers will get cut tonight.
I’m still working out the phrasing for the show. Esto wants me to say something like “The principal has spoken. You’ve failed the forum,” but I don’t like it. I need to think.
I’m a little worried when Reed gets her turn in the diary room with JP. Knowing how professional she tries to be, I’m concerned she may try to get herself kicked out of the game for kissing me, but she’s the picture of control. She doesn’t flinch once with JP. She knows even more about me than I thought she did. I’m thrown when she says she doesn’t know what my biggest accomplishment is or what I’m most proud of. I gave that one to her. She’s got scruples and I although I respect it, it also pisses me off. What the fuck? I went out of my way for her.
After the diary room meetings are complete, the contestants break for lunch. Esto, JP, and I eat in private in the forum to discuss the scores.
“Akio has the lowest score,” Esto admits.
“I’m not surprised. He’s too self-involved to pay attention to anyone other than himself.”
“But,” Esto continues, raising a finger to me, “I like the conflict between him and Bobby. Their banter adds comic relief and a bit of tension. I’d rather not cut Akio until there’s more drama.”
“Really, Esto? Is that what this show is about?” JP asks.
“No, of course not, but you have to admit his questions with Roman showed higher-level thinking. That alone is a good enough reason to give him another shot.”
“I’m starting to see how this whole thing is going to work, and I’m not sure I like it,” I reply.
Esto swivels to face me. He wipes the corner of his mouth with a napkin as JP crunches loudly on a chip. “I understand your concern, Roman, but the fact is, the more drama we have, the more viewers we get. The more viewers we have, the more people talk about the show. And the more people talk about the show, the more they discuss you and your music.”
“I see where your head is, Roman, but I can also see Esto’s point. Let’s put him in the bottom three. Maybe he’ll realize he almost went home and he’ll step it up,” JP says. “If he does poorly in the next round then he’s out. Deal?”
They both turn to me. I shrug. “Fine.”
As the meeting ends, we agree on the process for voting and I run an idea by Esto for my signature line. Surprisingly he loves it. “Sick” is how I believe he describes it. I do have a way with words. Sometimes. Unless a feisty cop has her lips on mine and then apparently I’m speechless.
What a day. It’s only 1:00 p.m. and there’s still so much to do. After a short walk around the grounds, I return to my dressing room and find Jen sitting at the desk.
She spins to face me and smiles awkwardly. If she had a trademark look, that would be it.
“What are you doing here?” I ask her.
“Waiting for you. I need to get you ready.”
“I understand that, but who let you in?”
“Dawson. Then he left. Did I do something wrong?”
Her knee bounces and she bites her lip. I know I make her nervous, so I choose my words carefully. “You didn’t do anything wrong, but in the future, I’d prefer if you weren’t here alone without Dawson or me present. I’m a very private person and I consider this part of my space.”
“I’m so sorry, Mr.… I mean Roman. It won’t happen again. Dawson couldn’t stay. Something happened, and he ran off.” She points at the cameras. “He took off to the west wing. You know… your other space?”
My heart constricts. I lean over Jen, locate him, and zoom in on his face. Is that worry I see? I fly out the door and my sprint quickly turns into a full run. I see blurs of shocked faces as I rush by the crew and contestants, but I don’t care. Something must be wrong. He never runs unless there’s an emergency.
I take the stairs two at a time and find three guards and Dawson convening in the hall. “What happened? What’s wrong?” I shout.
Dawson places a hand on my chest to hold me back. He whispers, “Everything’s fine. I would have come to get you if—”
“What happened?” I’m still yelling. Pushing his hand away, I stride down the hall. Dawson charges after me. The door is unlocked, and it causes me physical pain as I push on the cold hard wood.
She’s clearly shaken as she gazes up at me from the floor. She manages to smile, but she’s as white as a ghost and scrubbing the carpet near the bed. I steal a glance at the bed and see blood and vomit.
The weight of it drops me to my knees.
She skootches over to me and lifts my chin so that I’m looking her in the eyes. “There was a slight problem, but it’s all good now. I needed help this time, so I had to call for a guard. They called Dawson. Her eyes shift to glance behind me and I know he’s there. “I’m cleaning up now and in a little while everything will be right as rain. It’s the same thing that happened last month. We knew this could happen from time to time, but it’s under control. See for yourself.”
Rising from my knees, I make my way to the bed. Over the years, I’ve learned what to look for and everything is as it should be. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and let my fears slip away with the release of air from my lungs. “You shouldn’t have to clean this up. I have people,” I say when she bends back down to wipe the floor.
“I’m fine. It’s fine,” she says with another, brighter smile. “I’m glad you came to check. You had to see if with your own eyes, didn’t you?”
I
nod and feel Dawson’s hand on my shoulder. I turn to leave, not saying another word. Natalie knows how I get when I’m scared, and she knows Dawson has me.
He closes and locks the door behind us as we head down the hall. As soon I get to the stairwell, I realize what I’ve done.
At least ten pairs of eyes are looking at me from the bottom of the stairs. Cameras are rolling, and my rage grows.
As if on cue, Dawson speaks. “Nothing to see here, folks. Turn those cameras off right now,” he shouts, pointing to the cameramen, who surprisingly listen and pull away.
“We have a show to do. Back to your seats please.” Esto acts as if what occurred is an everyday thing. He calmly ushers the contestants back into the room like they’re a herd of cattle. He glances at me nervously before disappearing into the forum. What was once my personal space just became my personal secret.
“Dawson, I’m going to need a reason I ran up the stairs and it better be good.”
The detective in me wants answers. My mind races with possible scenarios as I make a mental list of the facts.
Roman runs through the forum, almost knocking over a camera or two. Esto is the next out the door, followed by JP, then Cedric. We all follow. Roman shouts, “What happened?” at least twice as he rushes out of sight. Esto and JP whisper to each other, concern etched all over their faces.
Out of the corner of my eye I see movement. A man in a trench coat is being ushered down the hall. He’s unfamiliar, but a guard I’ve seen before is leading him out or maybe in. What the hell?
Roman appears at the top of the stairs and I think he’s pissed. Glancing around, I notice we’re two people short. Logan and Kari aren’t here. When I go back into the forum, I realize they’re still in their seats. Bryce is there as well. Why didn’t they come with us? What did I miss?
“We promised you twists at every turn and boy, do we deliver!” Esto says with a smile, clapping his hands together. “I hope you enjoyed your lunch. We’re about to get to the results. Two more minutes!”
I did enjoy my lunch, actually. Bobby kept Tori and I entertained with his impression of Jean Paul during his interview. After he left, Tori and I compared notes. She found out from Naya that Roman’s ex-girlfriend was there. I guess she wanted a commitment from him and he ran. Tori also told me she spoke with Roman’s driver. Roman has six cars in his garage, two motorcycles, and a boat which he’s never used. The driver said he didn’t know why he had it but it was called Moby Dick. I thought boats were supposed to be named after girls. Why Moby Dick? Was it the whale or the dick he was referring to? Tori said the driver didn’t know either.
I told Tori about the guard I spoke with. I basically told her everything I knew, except the stuff about Roman breaking his hand by punching a wall. I don’t know why, but I decided to keep that for me. Maybe we both have tempers.
As I’m recalling the details in my head, Raul plops down in the seat next to me and winks. I smile awkwardly.
“You know,” he begins, “they could have put better cushions on these chairs, considering all the time we spend in them. My ass hurts.”
I chuckle. “Thanks for mentioning it. Now mine hurts too.”
“It should. You don’t have as much cushion on yours as I do.”
“Some people would call that muscle, not cushion,” I respond.
“Oh, so you’ve been looking at my muscle?”
I roll my eyes and he laughs. “How do you think you did? I wanted to ask you at lunch, but Tori was hoarding you.”
“I don’t know. Okay, I suppose, but there were a few that stumped me. How about you?”
“I’m pretty sure I aced it,” he says, folding his hands behind his head. His arm muscles flex and I give them a second look.
“Keep that up and you’ll be giving Creed a run for his money.”
“How’s that?” he asks, leaning closer.
“The cocky attitude,” I whisper. “Don’t let him rub off on you.” I nudge him with my elbow and garner a half-grin from Cedric, who appears to be listening.
“Well that depends,” Raul states. “Do you like cocky attitudes? Because if you don’t, then—”
“And what if I do?”
“Then I’m as arrogant as they come.”
Shaking my head, I say, “I prefer the confident side of cockiness. I’ve met enough conceited people to last me a lifetime.”
“Attention please. Here we go.” Esto counts us down, then points at Bryce.
“Welcome back to The Praetorian, the show where you can never let your guard down.” Bryce moves to the forum center and the camera follows him. Although I’m watching Bryce, I can feel Raul’s eyes on me. I’m not sure if that was flirting on his part or just conversation. I steal a glance at him and he smiles at me. I guess he was flirting. Do I like him? Do I want him to like me? I did just kiss Roman. Ugh. I’m going to allow myself one stupid act per lifetime, I guess I’m covered now.
“The last time we saw our contestants, they were in closed-door interviews. How do you think they did? Who’s your favorite? Make your predictions online and you could win tickets to the finale. Let’s listen in on the contestants at lunch.”
“And cut,” Esto yells. “Reposition.”
Bryce moves to the steps near the throne and waits for the signal. “As you can see there’s more going on than meets the eye. Some of our contestants learned more than others, but who? I think we’re ready for the results. How did they do? Who passed the test and who failed miserably? Let’s get your results from the man himself, your principal, Roman Creed.”
Spotlights flicker white and red as the main lights darken. “Returns a King” plays again. This song. I break out in chills as the voices fill the room. Roman guards stomp their way from the back doors to the front of the room in time with the music, ending near the throne. They bang their spears on the ground and back away, revealing Roman sitting on the throne. I didn’t even see him come into the room. His shirt is black now, but I’d know those jeans anywhere. The music slowly fades but continues to play softly as he speaks.
“Ladies and gentlemen, it seems some of you are taking this game more seriously than others. To a few of you, this may be only a job or a check, but this is my life. If you don’t want to be here, you should make my job a lot easier and leave now.”
Who the hell pissed him off? Someone must have scored really poorly for him to be this mad. What if he’s pissed at me from earlier? Or maybe it has to do with why he flew up the stairs. I need to know what happened. I’ll figure it out. I love a good mystery.
He stands. “Every one of these challenges is a means to an end. There are traits my EPO must have, and each test is designed to see what you are capable of. In this challenge, your job was to get to know me. Some of you put in the effort and impressed the hell out of me, and some of you, well…”
He sits down on the throne and pierces his lips in his fingers. “When I call your name, please move to the lighted spot, center stage.”
The lights turn red over the center of the forum and the music stops. Here we go.
“Raul Martinez.”
Raul stands as a light appears on the floor in the shape of the shield the roman guards are holding. As Raul moves toward it, the guards pound their spears on the floor in unison.
“Tori Johnson and Logan Porter.”
They take their places in a similar fashion, standing on their own lights, the placement of which seems to be random. “Cedric Calloway and Bobby McNeal.” More stomping.
Two more lights appear, almost dead center. Shit. Am I going home?
“Reed Manning.”
I stand and straighten my shirt. I’m in front of Cedric and Bobby, but dead center on my own.
“Kari Haston.”
Kari stands in front of me and to my left.
“Akio Goro, Naya Moore, and Matt Xavier.”
We’re all standing on lighted shields now.
“If your light stays out after the drums have ended, you
are safe and have the highest score for this challenge. Today’s champion will receive a medallion to wear around his or her neck. This medallion will give you immunity in the next challenge, but you still need to impress me or face the consequences. No one is beyond reproach.”
Roman stands and scowls. “Our champion is…” The lights under us flicker and flash in time with the drums. Mine goes out and comes back on again. The drums start slow and then pick up in speed until everyone’s lights are flashing at the same time.
Then suddenly, they stop. My light is on. I look forward and back and see Raul’s light is off. He smiles brightly as the group claps for him. Bryce places the gold medallion around his neck. The material holding the medallion is red, but the gold has an imprint on it. I can’t see what it says from here.
“Raul, it seems you’re someone to watch. Please take your seat and thank you for doing your job.”
As Raul sits, I’m suddenly uneasy. Maybe I should have used the info Roman gave me to answer the questions in my interview with Jean Paul. No, I did the right thing. I won’t be given an unfair advantage in this game because he feels bad for being tough on me. I can take tough. What I can’t take is smoldering eyes and sincerity. I prefer asshole Roman. Nice Roman makes me do stupid things.
“The shields under your feet will turn off in random order. When your light turns off, take your seat. You are safe for now. Three of you are at the bottom. One of you will go back to your seat, and the other two will have to fight to show they belong.”
Roman takes his seat on the throne and places a leg over one arm. He’s never worn light-colored jeans in here before and I’m closer than usual. I think I see a bulge in his pants. No… look away, Reed, look away. Stay away from the light. Do not go into the light.
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