The first person I see is Bryce. He’s standing off to the side, waiting for his next cue. I hear the guards coming up behind me.
“Cedric? Dawson? Where are they?”
Bryce points to the right and I see Cedric. His eyes widen when our eyes meet. “It’s Tori,” I hiss. “She’s going to hurt him.”
Cedric takes off running. Bryce’s eyes grow wide. “Where’s Raul?” I ask, desperate.
“Up in the balcony.” He points.
A guard reaches for me as I start to climb the stairs. I knee him in the groin and shove him backward, running up two at a time.
I scan the balcony. There are guests everywhere. There’s movement two sections down. Raul stands out. He’s walking forward to the ledge. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a gun. He aims, and I rush him. He fires as I tackle him to the ground. Am I too late?
There’s a sharp pain in my head and I’m lying on the floor. Dawson is lying on top of me. I’m not sure how long I lie that way until he finally moves.
“Are you hurt?” he asks. “Roman, are you hurt?”
I do a quick inventory. My head hurts, but I’m pretty sure it’s because I cracked it on the stage. “I think I’m okay.”
Dawson struggles to stand, and I reach out to him. “Are you?”
He brushes himself off. “I’m fine.”
There’s commotion all around me as police and security storm the stage. People are freaking out and running in every direction.
“Stay down,” he shouts, and I do as I’m told.
Cedric has Tori in a restraint hold; she’s struggling, but he’s got her. “What the fuck?” I say.
Dawson hovers over me, speaking into his headpiece. “Patch is secure. Do you have him? I repeat, do you have him?”
The police rush over to Cedric and put Tori in handcuffs. I lift my head off the stage and Dawson grumbles, “So help me God, if you move I will jump back on top of you. I’ll do it! I swear I will.”
I put my head to the floor. He’s a big man.
They have me sitting on the floor in handcuffs next to Raul. We’re both being held by the police.
“Just tell me, is he okay? Is Roman okay?” My chest heaves. Why won’t anyone tell me?
“She’s with us.” I hear a familiar voice and see Jean Paul pointing to me. I’ve never been so happy to see him in all my life. “Let her go. She’s a cop.”
As they help me up off the floor, I glance at the stage. There’s no sign of Roman anywhere. I turn to Jean Paul, but he’s already halfway down the stairs. The officer removes my cuffs and I rush to the edge of the balcony. I can’t see a thing. I fly downstairs, pushing past anyone who gets in my way. Everything is a blur. I can’t think.
My head spins as people pass me left and right at the base of the stairs. My hands fly to my head. If someone doesn’t tell me something, I’m going to scream.
As I touch my head, I realize my hair is down. I left the house without a ponytail for the first time in my life. Just as I feel tears threaten my eyes, I hear my name. I spin toward the sound.
He’s a sight for sore eyes. I allow myself to breathe again. He smiles at me and it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life. I do a quick assessment. I don’t see any blood. Is he real? Am I dreaming?
“You couldn’t stay away, could you?” he asks, crossing his arms.
The emotion of the moment overwhelms me, and I choke as I say the only word I can. “Nope.”
He huffs out a small knowing breath.
“You’re okay?”
“No, I’m not.” He takes a step closer to me and I assess his body, looking for any sign of injury.
He points to his chest, then places his hand over his heart. “I’m in love.”
Tilting my head, I feel a combination of relief and overflowing joy. “That makes two of us.”
He pulls on my arm and I crash into his chest. He presses his face into my hair and I tighten my grip around his waist.
“Do you see what happens when you leave me?” he whispers. “I can’t be trusted to take care of myself. I need you.”
I laugh lightly and raise my head to look at his face. “I guess we’ll have to take care of each other then, because I need you back.”
As he presses his forehead to mine, the chaos around us disappears. It doesn’t matter how many people come and go from my life or how many mistakes I make. We all have a past. We all have our sins to bear. But if I’m going to make it, I’m going to make it with him by my side. I feel it in my core.
It’s always been him. This is where I belong.
Three months later
“Have another one. I insist.”
“If I eat another chocolate chip cookie, I’m going to burst.” Dawson places his hand on his stomach. Maybe I shouldn’t push.
“What about me?” Roman asks.
“I baked these a little too long. They’re not as soft as the first batch.”
“I don’t care. Give them to me.”
“Hm, I don’t know,” I say pressing my hand to my lips. “What do I get in return?”
He rolls his eyes. “Fine!” He holds out the remote and I grab it excitedly. Roman rarely lets me have the remote. I guess we both like being in control too much.
I turn up the volume and he tries not to smile. He likes making me happy, even though he tries to act like he hates it. It’s our thing. Even though the finale aired last month, we decided to watch it on the DVR again tonight. I saw it all in person, but seeing the behind-the-scenes stuff is much more interesting.
I push Play as Cedric is announced as the winner of The Praetorian. I smile when I think back to his family and how proud they were of him at the show. I got an honorable mention for my part and the public went wild over all the drama.
Seamore Productions was careful to air our relationship in a positive light after it came out that Jean Paul knew Tori and Raul were up to something. He swore he didn’t know they were a threat and thought it was just good TV, but Roman was so furious, he threatened to sue. That was enough to get everything and anything he wanted.
The publicity Roman received from the show has given his career a significant boost. Sales are up and bookings have increased. He’s a hot commodity. There’s even been talk about writing his story.
Dawson’s phone rings and he steps outside Roman’s TV room to take the call. I didn’t even know this room existed. Another secret room. I swear I’ll never get used to this place. Even though I’m here almost every other night of the week, I still can’t figure out all the stairwells and secret doors.
Dawson steps back inside. “That was the FBI profiler. They confirmed Raul was the man outside your dressing room the night of the concert. He was blackmailing the guy we originally thought was the stalker. He’s the one that got him in.” He yawns. “I’m going to bed now. Call me if you need anything. I know Reed will keep an eye on you.”
I point both index fingers at him. “See ya.”
Roman rolls his eyes at me. He hates it when I do that, which is why I do it whenever I can.
“Hey, Dawson?” Roman says. “Thanks again.”
Dawson mumbles as he walks out, “Yeah, yeah, yeah. You want to thank me? Start listening.”
I let out a small laugh and Roman scowls. “You know, I think Dawson’s getting a little too cocky. I may have to let him go.”
I sigh, and he does his best to keep a straight face, but he can’t. “Am I that bad of an actor?” he asks.
“No, baby. I just get you.” I shove another cookie into my mouth and we turn to the TV.
Dawson is amazing. He’s apologized to me at least fifty times for not telling Roman I called at the venue. He said he kept sending them straight to voicemail because, even though he liked me, he didn’t trust me. I know he loves Roman. We both do.
I still can’t believe how crazy these last few months have been. So many clues right under our noses. One of Tori’s lotion bottles was actually filled with honey. Sh
e knew he was allergic from high school. She was obsessed with him. Ironically, it was never Roman who called her Icky Vicky. She overheard one of his friends and assumed it was Roman. Roman never once called her any names. He said he always felt bad for her.
He didn’t recognize her from high school. Not only had she lost weight, but she’d cut her hair and dyed it black. I was right when I assumed it wasn’t her natural color.
Raul convinced Jen to get him the iPad and then Tori used her hacker skills and parts from the tape recorder to break inside of it. After Tori slipped the honey into Roman’s drink at the bar and Roman was rushed to the hospital, Raul approached the actors and told them he’d get the gun back to Dawson. He told them his name was Logan Porter in case the truth ever came out. They never did reach the guy who was supposed to threaten Roman in the challenge. He disappeared. Raul and Tori are still under suspicion for him as well.
Tori used the iPad to rush-order bullets for the gun and was able to get to the delivery driver before he made it to the house during one of her walks. Once they hacked into the cameras through the iPad, they didn’t need it anymore, so they framed Kari. They needed to get rid of her. She was a threat.
Just as I think of her, she shakes hands with Roman on the TV screen. He offered her a job after the show. He said she was too talented to let go. I agreed. He’s a smart man.
I thought Raul was smart too, but I was wrong. He’s as messed up as Tori. They bonded over their difficult lives in high school and he promised her he’d repay her someday for taking care of his bully. When she presented Roman to him, he agreed to help her. Childhood trauma does weird things to people. I should know. Some people let it shape them and others shape themselves around it.
Roman and I were the lucky ones. Although I understand what Raul and Tori went through, it doesn’t excuse what they did. It’s never okay to take out your anger on others. I too had to learn from that mistake. It’s one I’ll never make again.
“What are you thinking about?” Roman asks as he lifts my legs over his.
I wipe a bit of chocolate from the corner of his mouth. “Everything,” I reply.
“You’re thinking about me, aren’t you?” he asks with a smirk.
“Ew, no. Why would I do that?”
He shifts my legs and pushes me back into the couch, hovering over me. He lifts the remote and turns off the TV, then places the cookies on the table next to the couch.
I smile up at him as he presses his body against mine.
“Marry me?” he asks, grinding into me. The man knows my weakness.
“I’m still thinking about it. I mean, come on. We barely know each other.”
He shakes his head. “What else do you need to know? I love you, you love me. We’re perfect for each other.”
“Reed Creed?” I say and cringe. “There’s no way.”
“Then don’t take my name. I don’t care. All I want is you.”
“And you have me.”
“Then why not make it official?”
I sigh. “If I agree, will you stop asking so we can have hot sex?”
“I’ll fuck you into next week if you agree.”
“You’re so romantic,” I tease.
He closes his eyes and when he opens them he’s even hotter than before. I’ll never get used to the way he looks at me. I still don’t know how I got so lucky.
He pushes up off me and walks over to a drawer by the bookcase. He pulls something out and hides it behind his back.
He already did the great big romantic proposal. At first I said yes, but then I said no because, shit, it’s only been three months. But he’s determined. It’s one of the things I love about him.
“What now?” I ask, motioning to whatever he’s hiding.
“You question how romantic I am?”
I shrug. He’s the most romantic man I’ve ever known, but I need to keep him on his toes.
He hands me a pad of paper.
“What’s this?” I ask, sitting up.
“Go ahead. Look for yourself.”
There’s a piece of loose paper inside. It’s my profile from the game.
“Turn it over.”
As I turn the paper, I gasp. It’s like looking in the mirror. Flipping through the pad, I find page after page of drawings of me. Some as I sat at the table in the forum. Others of me at the dining room table. One of me at the pool. One of me from the laundry room in my underwear, nice. Another as I slept. Another of me laughing. One of the looks he hates that I give him. Another of me sitting next to Deacon’s bed and reading to him.
I gaze up at him and feel the tears well. Why does this man always make me want to cry in the best way possible? I never knew there was such a thing as happy tears until he came into my life.
“I could draw you in my sleep. I know everything about you. Every inch of your face, every curve of your body, and every beautiful thing on the inside as well. You say I don’t know you, but I beg to differ. I’ve never cared to know anything more.”
A single tear rolls down my cheek and he wipes it away. I close the notebook and hold it tight against my chest. “I hate you,” I tell him.
He smiles. “I know.”
I climb on top of him, straddling his thighs as I gaze deeply into his beautiful eyes. “This is going to be a long-ass engagement. Do you understand me?”
He tries to hide his smile.
“And we’re going to have lots and lots of babies. Maybe even adopt a couple. Do you hear that?”
He nods.
“And you’re going to draw all of them and you’re going to write special songs about each one of them.”
He smiles a little brighter.
“And you’re never going to get rid of me, so you’d better get used to that idea too.”
“It’s a lot to think about, but I think I can handle it. Is that a yes? A definite yes?”
I hold his face in my hands. “It’s always been yes. It always will be yes, because it’ll always be you.”
I burn his returning smile into my memory. It’s another one of the best days of my life, because when it’s right, you know it, you feel it, you breathe it in.
I never let my guard down until he came into my life and now, the only wall I want to build is one to keep us safe. I’ll protect his heart just like he protects mine.
I’ve finally found my home.
The End
Let me start by thanking my heart and soul. To my boys, Tyler and Ryan: You are every breath I take and my reason for being. I love you more than anything. Your laughter, humor, and love keep me pushing forward to follow my dreams and make a better life for us. I thank God for you each and every day.
Kim Hurschik: My sister by choice. You have been my rock, as always. Not only do you let me bounce all my crazy thoughts off of you, but you understand my ramblings better than anyone. I know I tell you all the time how grateful I am for you, but I feel I need to say it again. I don’t know how I would have made it through this past year without your friendship and support. I love you.
Dorrie Cortesi: Girl… Thank you for listening without judging and for getting me even when I don’t get myself. I love you my friend. Here’s to better, brighter happier days. Let’s go get more coffee. Our chats keep me sane.
Misty Marcum: Where did you come from? What magic did I use to get you to volunteer to do things for me? Thank you for not only beta reading for me, but also for being my admin. I feel like I’ve known you my whole life. Every once in a while, God places someone into your life, and you just know they are a gift. Thank you for being my friend and for always believing in me. Love you tons.
Andee Michelle: My soul sister. There’s a reason we don’t live near each other. If we did, we’d never get any work done. Thank you for being a positive light in my negative sky. Thank you for beta reading for me and getting my humor. I adore you and your words. Now give me Ben. I’m still waiting.
Nikki Kroll: I have your number now and I plan on using it. Thank y
ou for not only reading my words, but understanding them and me. You have been such an amazing friend to me and I know I don’t deserve you. Thank you for always encouraging me and telling me it’s going to be okay. In five months I’m going to hug you so hard.
Amélie White Vahlé: Thank you for your amazing, detailed notes and for loving my crazy words, no matter what genre I give you. I wish we didn’t have oceans separating us, but nothing can keep us from being friends. I’m so lucky to have you in my life.
Jodie Larson: Even though we haven’t met yet, I feel like we’ve been friends forever. Thank you for being the sex scene goddess you are and for helping me with my craft. I promise to bug you for years to come.
My Twisted Chick-Lits: My safe place, my harbor in the storm… The coolest, most supportive people I know. Not only do you have dirty, twisted minds like I do, but you love and support each other too. It warms my heart. I thank my lucky stars for this group and your friendship. I love you all.
My Girl Gang: Gah!!!! The fact that you all signed up for this, still boggles my mind. I don’t know that I deserve you, but damn if I don’t appreciate each and every one of you. Your work with this book starts now. Love you gang.
Hazel James: Thank you for random messages. Thank you for quotes that make me feel stronger. Thank you for always knowing the perfect GIF for every occasion. Thank for you socks that rock. Thank you for being my friend. I love you.
Jennifer Mock: You came into my life one day not that long ago and now I don’t know how I functioned without you. Thank you for random book giveaways and messages in the middle of my night that make me smile in the morning. Thank you for volunteering to be my admin—no easy task. Thank you for having my back, for supporting me no matter what, and for loving my words. Your friendship means the world to me and I love you.
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