by Ashley West
I flipped my forearm over and she took it in her hands, maneuvering it in the light until she could see our picture. I looked down at the two of us on the day when we got married.
Ashlyn looked beautiful. Like an angel or a dream. I looked stupidly happy.
I looked back up at my sister but she wasn't looking at the picture anymore. She was looking at me.
"You care for her," she said. It was a statement of fact.
There was no use lying to Freya.
"I did. But she left. She's probably halfway back to Earth by now."
"You married a human?"
"It's called TerraMates, what were you expecting? It was supposed to be a marriage of convenience," I said. I was getting defensive.
"It was supposed to be?" My sister raised one eyebrow. "But it wasn't?"
"I'll tell you the truth, Freya. I fell for her pretty hard. I thought she felt the same way, but she left me."
"She left you?" she asked. "When?"
"Today. I went back to say good-bye to her, and she left to go for a walk."
Freya was looking confused.
"I had to go without taking proper leave," I said, bitterly. She hurt me when she didn't give me a good-bye kiss. "When I saw her computer, there was a receipt on the screen from TerraMates. She transferred a lot of money that she got for marrying me."
"The agency pays the women to marry random guys?" Freya said.
"'TerraMates fairly compensates the brides for their endeavors,'" I quoted. "I guess she didn't care about me as I cared about her. Once she got her money, she disappeared."
I ran my fingers through my hair, a sure sign that I was upset, and continued with my tale of woe.
"I talked to my maid from the ship. All her stuff was gone, and she left a goodbye note. She didn't even have the decency to say goodbye in person." Damn, that had pissed me off.
"But you didn't talk to her?" Freya said, getting to the heart of the matter like always.
"Well, no."
"You don't know for sure that she left you. You're making assumptions. If I had told you this morning that she was going to leave you, would you have believed me?"
"Never in a million years."
"Then maybe she didn't leave, Nat. There are plenty of reasons why her clothes could be gone. What if something happened to her on that walk? A human on Vandwa? Things can happen to a woman alone."
I stared at my sister.
It hadn't occurred to me that something bad might have happened to her. I had been so caught up in what it looked like that I never imagined that she might have had an accident.
She sat back, nodding.
"You've got it bad, little brother," she said.
"Tell me about it, Freya. I thought she was the one," I said, placing a call to have one of the staff search the island and the waters around it.
"You better figure out where she is and talk to her before you destroy a relationship in your mind."
________________________________________
I felt on edge until my maid told me she wasn't anywhere on or around the island. I felt relieved that she was safe, but it was difficult for me to reconcile that emotion with bitterness, so I shoved it aside.
If she wasn't lost or hurt, that made it more likely that she left me.
Freya and I had dinner and were sipping wine, discussing the refugee situation.
"Did you offload the new supplies yet, Nat?"
"The crew is supposed to be doing that right now."
"It's been almost three weeks. Some of the families were getting hungry. The kids are all looking so skinny. It breaks my heart and makes me angry at the same time. How can the government let this happen?"
"All we can do is what it's possible to do. I get the diverted shipments and bring them here to the people that they were intended for. You distribute them and make sure the people have what they need. What else can we do in a system that's full of corruption?"
"Where was this one going?"
I sighed.
"To the Wai refugee camp. Again."
"Those fucking rich bastards," she said, slapping her knee, lifting her hand and flinging it up in a Vandwan gesture of contempt.
"I'm sure Jori doesn't know anything about it," I said, but the words didn't ring true. I was afraid our little brother knew all about it and might have a hand in it. He liked luxuries. When the island where he lived had disappeared underneath the rising ocean, and he relocated to a refugee camp, he hadn't wanted to give up all the special things to which he had grown accustomed.
One way the rich of Vandwa were fueling their lifestyles, even in the refugee camps, was by stealing shipments meant for other camps and selling them for a profit.
Both Freya and I had offered to let Jori come live with us, but he had refused. I thought I knew why. Was it because in the refugee camps of the rich, the lifestyle was lavish and the party never ended? It was all paid for by the government, of course.
Meanwhile, the ordinary people suffered.
Freya looked at me.
"I know you want to believe that he doesn't have anything to do with this, Nat. I do too. But the evidence is becoming overwhelming. This has to stop."
"I know, Freya, but what else can we do?"
"You could find out who's behind this, Nat. If we knew who in the government was diverting the ships in the first place and who was paying them off, we could expose them and put an end to the corruption."
What she was asking was impossible, because I was afraid Jori would be at the bottom of it all.
"You could go back to your work, Nat. Your real work." She put her hand on mine. "I know you were close to a solution. I know you miss it."
I stared at the ground. I did have an idea to counteract the rising water levels, but I didn't have enough time to work on the design. I needed to take measurements and build a prototype to see if it was feasible.
It was a possibility. It was an idea that could save our world. If it were successful, we wouldn't have to move a whole planet full of refugees. But I couldn't go back to my work considering the current situation.
It was foolish, selfish thinking. I couldn't go back to fiddling around in the lab while people were going hungry.
"Freya, these people need us. They need to eat. It's the right thing to do."
"I know, Nat. We will, as long as we have to. But I have a feeling that you're reluctant to investigate because you're afraid it's going to be Jori."
"That is just what I'm afraid of, Freya. He's our flesh and blood. How can I expose him and send him to jail?"
She shook her head.
"We all make our choices, Nat. If he's making wrong ones, then he will have to face the consequences. We can't shield him from that. Maybe we babied him too much. But we don't know for sure; maybe he's innocent. We won't know unless you find out."
I nodded.
"I'll see what I can dig up, Freya," I said, feeling tired. There was no arguing with my sister. "I should get back on board. We have to catch the tide and get out of the restricted zone before the police start doing their rounds in the morning."
"Okay. Is Vess coming by or are you going back alone?"
"Alone. He's spending the night in a hotel with his woman. He said he wanted some privacy."
Freya laughed.
"Well, there's little enough of that on a ship," she said. She had spent as much time on the Dream as I had.
We stood up, and she gave me a long hug.
"Give that girl of yours a chance. Let her explain her side of it before you give up on her, Nat," she said as we stepped back away from each other.
"Maybe," I said.
"Find out where she is. What if a shark got her or something?" she said, laughing.
"Don't say that, Freya," I said, feeling fear clawing at my heart, as it had the other night in the hospital. But I shoved it back into my well of bitterness.
"If it bothers you so much to hear me say it, how would you feel if it actually happened?
Just find her. It can't be that hard to locate one small pretty blonde human."
Chapter Twenty-One
ASHLYN
I followed Nathaniel back to the ship, my head reeling from what I had found out. I hadn't caught all of their conversation, but I had heard enough to know that he wasn't just a pirate.
I kept him in sight on the main path, while I followed quietly through the forest. Large trees dotted the land; they were similar to palm trees. In between was a silky, fern that was soft grass. It was easy for me to conceal myself.
I wondered what I should do. I needed to talk to him. But how was I going to get back on the ship? Jumping into the ocean and swimming for it wasn't going to work now that I knew there was a shark in the water.
I looked up to make sure Nathaniel was ahead of me and felt a bolt of fear go through me when I couldn't see him. The sun had set and the night was falling, but it wasn't dark yet. Where had he gone?
I continued to walk as quickly as I dared, hoping to catch up, when suddenly a man jumped out from behind a tree and pinned my arms behind me. I struggled for a moment before I sniffed a hint of his scent.
I'd know the smell of that body anywhere. If I were a dead woman, a whiff would make me rise.
"Nathaniel," I hissed, furious. "Let me go."
He freed my arms and I turned around, ready to give him an earful for grabbing me like that, but his look of surprise startled me.
"How did you know who it was?" he said, baffled.
"You have a very distinctive scent," I said before I could stop myself.
He looked taken aback.
"You knew it was me because I smelled like myself?"
"Yes, you smell like you, okay? What are you doing here?"
A look of satisfaction passed over his face. Then it disappeared, replaced with a glare, anger and resentment in his eyes.
"I might ask you the same thing," he said, scowling. "I thought you left." He pressed his lips together looking hurt and very bitter.
"Left to go where?" I asked, bewildered at this point. "Why would you think that?"
"Because you weren't at my house."
"You checked up on me?"
"I saw the bank transfer. I saw how much money you got for marrying me. I know you married me for the money."
"Am I supposed to feel guilty about that?" I said, feeling irritated. "You only married me to keep your sorry ass out of jail. I was a personal get out of jail free card that you took home and seduced as an extra bonus."
His face grew stormy.
"If you'll remember, I was not the one who started things. I was a perfect gentleman. I thought that was what you wanted."
"A gentleman doesn't lie," I said, getting angry. "A gentleman doesn't pretend he loves a girl and then leave her while he goes off gallivanting across the ocean. A gentleman would have told her he was a pirate."
He stepped closer to me.
"I would like to propose that you, Nathaniel, are not a gentleman," I said. I pushed him back out of my personal space.
He caught my hand.
"What are you, a lady? I'd like to propose that you aren't a lady at all. A lady doesn't sell herself." The bitter resentment was back in his eyes, and I twisted my hand out of his and slapped him as hard as I could.
"You bastard. You don't know anything about it."
I stood there, my breathing coming fast and my cheeks feeling hot. He had gone too far.
"I didn't mean that, Ashlyn," he said, stepping closer again.
"What? You didn't mean to call me a whore? That was an accident?"
"You called me a thief," he said, raising his voice and moving even closer.
"And didn't you steal today?" I said.
"I did," he said, and we were inches apart.
"Well, I guess I sold myself for money, which makes me a whore," I said. "So where does that fucking leave us?"
We were both breathing hard. I was angry, upset and hurt. Adrenaline was pumping through me. I don't know what came over me, but I pushed forward a little bit more and felt my nipples brush his chest.
His eyes dilated, and he grabbed me roughly. We kissed so hard our teeth clashed. I was instantly on fire, my panties wet, my core needing to be filled. Nathaniel was the only man who could do it.
After a minute, he realized we were standing on the main path and he grabbed my hand. He pulled me further off the road into a secluded copse. It was getting dark and there were several trees in a circle, making it private.
When we stood in the center of it, he gazed into my eyes and heat flooded my veins. Without warning, he grabbed me and pulled me close again. I felt his hand tangle in my hair. He tilted my head so he could deepen the kiss. Desperately, I kissed him back. I wasn't thinking. I reacted on instinct.
He peeled my damp shirt and bra off of me, then my shorts, tossing them nearby and pulling off his pants and shirt. He laid me down on my side, facing him in the soft grass, and we kissed. He was sexy, and I thought I would explode then and there. Our legs tangled and I pressed my mound up against his thigh. I needed the stimulation.
His lips left my mouth and kissed down to my chest, where he took one breast in his mouth sucking and licking. He even nipped me gently but by that time I was so crazy with passion that it only drove me higher.
There were no words. There were only touches, caresses, and a burning desire that fueled our actions.
His hand slid down until he glided into my soaking wet slit. He drew in a deep, shaky breath and began to rub me in long strokes up and down. Next, he found my nub and pretty soon, I was at the edge.
At the moment when I thought he would put his finger up inside me, which was what I needed him to do, his hand disappeared.
I made a moaning noise, but I felt him on top of me and something bigger and harder pressing at my entrance. I opened my legs wide, arching my breasts up in an agony of wanting.
He thrust hard, filling me in one swift motion and I gasped at the feeling. He pulled out again and embedded himself to the hilt once more. He continued this for some time until I felt I would go nuts if he didn't speed up.
"Faster," I begged. "Harder. Please, Nathaniel."
I heard him gasp, and he hesitated only a moment before he began pounding into me over and over. I wrapped my legs around him and held on, which changed the angle. I felt him going deeper inside me than he had gone the other night.
I arched in wild response, moving as frantically as he was. That was when I felt it start to build. It felt good, but I knew that to go over that edge would feel even better. I worked to change the angle of my hips until he was grinding against my clit with every thrust.
That did it.
He kept driving into me and after only a few more thrusts, I felt myself let go with the longest, hottest, release of my life. It went on and on, and I rode the waves of sheer ecstasy — my body convulsing and bucking against his.
Once my orgasm began, he didn't hold back. I felt him stiffen and then press me hard into the ground with his hips as he shuddered to completion. My body continued to spasm beneath him as he pinned me until at last I relaxed, and he rolled off of me.
He pulled me against him immediately, and I felt the hurt inside me recede as he held me close and kissed my forehead.
"That was probably a big mistake," he said into the darkness. "But it felt so fucking good."
A mistake?
He was right — both about it being a mistake and it feeling awesome — but to say it out loud immediately after seemed impolite.
"Ashlyn," he said, "I am still angry, and I don't understand everything, but you need to know this."
I waited, holding my breath.
"I never pretended to love you. I do love you," he said and showed me — kissing me until I lost my breath.
"The course of true love never did run smooth," I whispered to myself.
Nathaniel's breath hitched — he had heard me.
"What's that?"
"A quote from one of ou
r most famous playwrights," I said.
He stared at me.
"Do you believe it?"
"I guess maybe I do," I said, still not able to say it.
He sighed, looking away.
"Well, he sounds very smart," Nathaniel said, getting up. "We should get dressed. It was crazy to do this out in the open where anyone could catch us."
I agreed. And it had been exciting because of that, too. We dressed and headed back up the trail, holding hands.
"We're not done with this, Ashlyn, but for now I have to get you back safely to the ship. Then we can talk and see where we're at."
"Yes, safe back on the ship sounds good," I said, shivering a little at the thought of the shark.
"Ashlyn," he said a moment later. "How did you get off the Dream?"
I didn't reply right away, sure now that it had been stupid and not wanting to have to admit it.
"I swam," I said, finally.
"You swam," he said. His voice sounded calm, but his body language suggested otherwise. "In the shark-infested water, in the middle of the wild and without any protection?"
"Yes," I said, quietly. "But I only saw the one shark."
He stopped unexpectedly and I was lost in his arms as he held me so tight I could hardly breathe. When he pulled back, finally I could see there were two silver tracks on his cheeks.
"Look, woman," he said. "I don't care if we break up. Or if you're a money grubber, and I'm a pirate. You're not allowed to die. Is that clear?"
"Yes," I said, and being unable to stop myself, I stood on tiptoe and kissed the tears away.
"Stop risking your life," he said, grabbing my hand and pulling me roughly down the trail again. "I can't handle it."
________________________________________
Vess stared at me as I got to the top of the rope ladder and climbed over.
"What are you doing here?" he said, his face impassive.
"I stowed away," I said, waiting for him to react. He seemed fierce.
"What? And you've been sleeping on the floor?" he said, aghast. "You should have told me, little one. I would have hidden you. There's an empty cabin."
I smiled at the kind giant and watched nervously as my husband climbed back onto the ship.