by Agnès Ruiz
“You remember, the emergency doctor”, she told him, a little bit mean.
She didn’t hear his response, but pretended she did. Finally, she ended the call and hung up. She would have given anything to see Guillermo’s face at that moment. Did he care? Had it upset him?
“Was it important?” Paul inquired.
“Not that much, I should probably go check on the seaside hotel this evening.”
“So it’s done with us then?”
Paul seemed annoyed. Joanna asked herself if she hadn’t judged him wrongly in the end. Perhaps he wasn’t really watching the pretty girls moving. However, Guillermo’s comment during their first time at the hospital sprung back to her mind. “He’s a ladies man.”
Whatever! Joanna was annoyed. What did he know, anyway?
She was still upset at Guillermo for not making her stay behind in his room, earlier. Why had he said it was complicated? What was complicated and why hadn’t she asked him instead of rushing off?!
Argh! She felt as though she would go mad with all this craziness. She should make a move on Guillermo. And then there was Paul: wonderful, terrific and funny... no, not funny, that wasn’t his case, she corrected her own thoughts. But anyway, he was in front of her, this handsome masculine specimen would suit her for a while.
Wasn’t that what she wanted: Not to become involved with a man and avoid suffering?
A creeping little voice told her it was already too late. Her heart beat a little faster each day that she knew Guillermo better.
And her heart was in pain once more, as it was in the past, just before the birth of Zoé. What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she build anything meaningful with a man?
“I’ll have another drink”, she announced tersely.
“That doesn’t sound good”, Paul mumbled.
He went to get two drinks and came to settle very closely next to Joanna who had a worried look.
“We could both go and relax. I think you need it.”
He stroked her hair as the other hand was on her thigh and tried to slide under her dress. Joanna moved back along the seat.
“Hey, beauty, there’s nothing wrong. We are two consenting adults, right?”
He murmured that he had wanted her since the first day.
“That was what the rose was for?” she argued.
Paul frowned.
“Didn’t you like it? It usually works...”
Joanna began laughing at what Paul had just confirmed to her.
“It usually works?” she repeated. “Frankly, Paul, what do you take me for?”
“What did I say?”
“Nothing, actually. I think I’m wasting my time, or yours, I don’t know anymore.”
Paul’s smile transformed into a sneer. He observed Joanna’s reaction as she stood up. He gripped her had more firmly.
“We haven’t finished”, he articulated aggressively.
“You’re hurting me, let me go”, Joanna cried.
“Who do you think you are exactly?”
“I suppose I don’t measure up to you”, Joanna completed, playing his game.
Now, she wanted to finish this idiotic comedy as quickly as possible.
70
Paul had probably drunk too much. At least she could see his true colours...
“She kindly asked you to let go of her. You should do it.”
Joanna and Paul looked up at the same time to see Guillermo.
“What’s he doing here?” Paul asked.
Joanna could have asked the same question, but at the time, she felt reassured to have him at her side.
“Let her go or I’ll take care of you!” Guillermo repeated.
His voice sounded like a threat and he leaned forward, one hand flat on the table. Joanna couldn’t hear everything they were saying to each other. She was suddenly happy seeing the fear in Paul’s eyes and she felt that he wasn’t pleased.
He finally released the pressure on her hand. She sighed when Paul got up, moved before Guillermo with rage and moved away from them.
“Are you OK, Joanna?”
“Errm, yes, I think so... Thanks!”
She felt stupid. The lack of words she had in this situation boggled the mind.
“What... what are you doing here?” she suddenly asked, as she came to her senses.
Guillermo frowned, visibly surprised.
“I told you on the phone that I was coming.”
“Earlier?”
“Yes.”
Joanna tried to remember. It was true the conversation had been too complicated to follow. The music was so loud here. She hadn’t been as attentive as she should have.
“I didn’t hear... or didn’t understand. Well, you didn’t need to come; I would have managed very well by myself. I’m a big girl.”
“I guessed as much.”
Suddenly wanting to tease him, she leaned closer to him.
“I thought it was complicated between us. What are you doing here?”
“I shouldn’t have said that...”
“But you did”, Joanna insisted.
“Are you going to be mad at me forever?”
“Who knows...?”
They laughed, and were like old friends once again.
“Can I get you a drink?” Joanna offered.
“No, I think you’ve already had enough to drink.”
“You’re such a party-pooper. Has anyone told you that before?” Joanna asked.
“Many times. I’d prefer it if we left. We can talk better.”
“About what?”
Joanna was suspicious. But she was surprised when Guillermo mentioned Mélanie’s long absence.
“Mélanie?” she repeated, intrigued.
“Yes. It’s not normal. Nobody has seen her since your father’s office was broken into.”
“What are you saying?”
Guillermo sighed and took Joanna by the elbow.
“We’re leaving. We can’t hold a decent conversation here.”
“But I don’t want to! I’m having fun. I came here for that. And the seaside hotel is no longer part of my life.”
Joanna pulled herself away and went back to the dance floor. However, she saw Paul and didn’t like the bitterness she saw in his eyes. She looked behind her at Guillermo who was waiting next to the table they were at earlier. She felt caught between a rock and a hard place. Indecisive and annoyed at the same time.
She thought of Mélanie. It was true that she had nothing to do with the seaside hotel any more. But if the young intern really had disappeared, she couldn’t pretend she didn’t care. What if the little one really was in danger?
She was powerless to act as if it had nothing to do with her, and she moved towards Linda, still in gallant company and told her that they should leave.
71
As expected, Linda refused outright.
“We’re only just beginning to have fun”, she protested. “It’s so early! Look, this is Fred.”
The man she pointed to was dark haired. He was with his brother, Julien, a charming blond. Linda really liked him. She insisted Joanna dance with Fred.
Joanna glanced at the brothers. It was undeniable, they were appealing. But her urge to have fun had eclipsed as much with Paul’s behaviour as it did with Guillermo’s unexpected arrival. She leaned towards her friend to tell her she couldn’t stay.
“Are you sure they’re legit, these two?” she whispered, her lips against her friend’s ears.
“Great, Jo.”
“Make sure you send me a message, OK?”
“Already done, beautiful. An awesome selfie. You’ll see I’m in between Fred and Julien. Didn’t you get it?”
Joanna avoided the question. At least her friend had respected their agreement. For a long time now, they had a habit of taking a photo with whichever guy they were with that evening, then sending the file “in case of need”, in a message with the time and place. That way they made sure they wouldn’t have any problem ge
tting home or that they weren’t in danger when they each went their own way.
They didn’t want to be on the news.
Joanna sighed when she noticed Paul who looked like he wanted to come back towards her. The urge to stay, even to annoy Guillermo into accepting a dance, was strong. How would he react? She wondered, devoured by curiosity, but aware that she was playing with fire.
“Who’s that guy?” Paul asked, nodding towards Guillermo.
Obviously, he hadn’t gotten over the fact that he was out of the game. He was holding Joanna’s arm a bit too tightly. It was clearly a bad habit.
“You don’t remember your patient...? You wouldn’t hit a patient, would you? That wouldn’t look good on your record.”
Paul’s eyes slid over Joanna, resting a little too long along her silhouette, moulded into her tube dress.
“You’re nothing but a tease. I didn’t think you were like that, Joanna. But I’m far from offended... We’ll see each other again, believe me.”
Joanna wondered how she could have been so attracted to this guy. She stepped back and asked him to let go of her, without taking her eyes off his.
“Or else what? You’re going to call your bodyguard?” Paul mocked.
“Why not!”
She challenged him, perhaps a little too much. Maybe she shouldn’t have had that other glass. Paul finally let go of her whilst he murmured something that she couldn’t quite hear.
When she returned, she came across Guillermo’s furious look. Yet he hadn’t moved from his spot and had waited. What was he waiting for? For her to simply come back to him?
Why were these men so complicated this evening? Why didn’t anything go the way she wanted?
She thought that by handing in her resignation, everything would work out. For the moment, it wasn’t looking too promising!
She went back to Linda to tell her she was going home.
“Alone?” her friend wanted to know, her face baffled.
Joanna hesitated then pointed out Guillermo.
“I’ll explain later”, she finally concluded as she moved away.
She returned to Guillermo, but jumped when she heard the voice of her friend Linda, behind her.
“I’m Linda, Joanna’s best friend”, she whispered, holding her hand out to Guillermo. “And you are...”
Joanna couldn’t believe her eyes. Her friend was playing the “I-want-to-know-everything-now!” card.
“We have to go”, Joanna explained in a tone that was a little drier than necessary.
However, Guillermo seemed like he was having fun with the situation. He shook Linda’s hand, introducing himself as:
“I’m Joanna’s neighbour.”
“Oh! The one whose ceiling was leaking”, Linda repeated, amused.
“That’s exactly right.”
With that, Guillermo wasn’t ashamed to show his plaster then pointed to Joanna, as if insisting on the fact that she was responsible for the state he was in.
“And have you been going out together for long?”
Guillermo observed Joanna’s reaction. Her surly look only confirmed his suspicions. Not only had she not told her best friend about him, but she still wanted him out of her life. Why was she reacting this way? Still with an aim to protect herself?
“We get on well”, replied Guillermo.
“Right, that’s enough, you two. We’re going, Linda. I’ll call you tomorrow without fail.”
“Oh what a pain! What a killjoy you can be sometimes, my girl”, Linda complained.
“She said the same thing to me, earlier”, said Guillermo who seemed to enjoy making Joanna angry.
However, Linda was looking at him warily.
“I’m sure she was joking. I don’t find you to be a killjoy at all. And I hope we’ll meet again soon to get to know each other more.”
“Don’t count on it”, Joanna mumbled, “he thinks it’s complicated; everything’s too complicated”.
72
When Joanna got back, she realised that Guillermo had heard her comment. Yet, she had been discreet. But how had she been in such a hubbub when mumbles become shouts?
“Is your car parked OK? Nothing is going to happen to it where it is now?” asked Guillermo once they were outside.
“Of course. Why?”
“Because we’re going to take a taxi back.”
Once again, Joanna pulled a face.
“You always seem to think of everything. Who are you really, Guillermo?”
“We’ll talk later. It’s not your day, I’d say.”
“Oh! Because I drank a bit?”
“More or less.”
A taxi arrived and he pushed her inside before sliding in next to her. He gave their address; At least it was advantageous to have the same one.
“How did you know where to find me?” Joanna insisted.
“Is it important? I’d say I got there at the right time. With that Paul.”
“He didn’t want anything bad; only to have fun, like me.”
She was bragging now that she knew the emergency doctor was out of range. Yet, his words still resounded in her head.
Were they empty threats? She wondered again.
He had simply had too much to drink. What was she afraid of? She knew who he was. She didn’t see him come to make a scene just because she’d pushed him away. He would find a girl this evening; then he would forget the incident, as would Joanna.
“I know guys like that”, insisted Guillermo, bursting the bubble where she had taken refuge.
“You know nothing. Paul is sound.”
“I wanted us to talk. But I don’t think now is the time, Joanna.”
“It won’t be, either anyway. We’ll stay neighbours. That’s all.”
Guillermo seemed upset. He hesitated and Joanna used the moment to ask her question again.
“Did you find me with your tracer? That’s it, isn’t it? The way you did with my daughter.”
“Why do you say that, it’s as if I’d done something wrong.”
“Because I don’t trust you anymore. I never told you where I was this evening when we spoke on the phone. And then you show up out of nowhere...”
Guillermo paid the driver and they went in. He didn’t stop at his flat and went up to Joanna’s.
“You have your keys, I presume.”
“No, I wasn’t counting on coming home. It’s finished between us. As you don’t give me any explanations.”
“I will do, tomorrow... But you’re not going to like it.”
Joanna tried to hold him back, for him to say everything now. She left the door open, watching him go down the stairs.
“Guillermo?” she called.
He didn’t reply. She tried again with no success.
Had she ruined it all? Had she ruined it since she had decided to hand in her resignation?
She closed her door then took a shower. Now all she dreamed of was finding her bed and falling asleep. And forgetting everything.
Would tomorrow be simpler?
73
When Joanna got up very late the next morning, she found herself nose to nose with her mother in the kitchen. Lorelli was sitting in a high stool and leafing through a magazine, a cup of coffee in her hand.
“What are you doing here?” Joanna grumbled.
“Good morning, Mum, I’m pleased to see you, too”, Lorelli started again, parodying her daughter, perkier than she.
“Yes, good morning, Mum”, Joanna was impatient... “And now, I’m going to ask you again, what are you doing here?”
Lorelli looked at her daughter, guarded for a few seconds before announcing straight away:
“I have come because we need to talk.”
“Why is it you all want to talk?”
Lorelli swept away her argument with an unconcerned movement of the hand.
“I’ve made coffee. It will do you good by the look of it. Sit down!”
“We are in my house, here”, Joanna answered bac
k, unhappy with such a wake up.
“You must have noticed I waited nicely. I could have come to shake you a good hour ago, at least.”
Joanna opened her mouth in astonishment, ready to protest. Nonetheless, the curses remained in her mouth. She knew that it was a lost cause. She couldn’t find a valid excuse in her mother’s eyes. First, she poured a glass of water then finally accepted the steaming cup that her mother held out with insistence.
She wondered what Lorelli could have been doing all this time as she slept! One hour roaming around her flat. That didn’t suggest anything good.
Knowing her, she must have inspected the fridge, checking the state of the flat and who knows what else!
Joanna decided that she didn’t care.
“Difficult evening?” Lorelli asked as the silence lingered between them.
“I went out with Linda last night.”
“You don’t need to explain yourself. You are well within your rights to do what you want with your life.”
“Especially now I’m not working, is that it?”
“What are you after, Joanna? It wasn’t an insult.”
Joanna doubted it. She gazed at the black coffee and drank another mouthful. Unable to stop herself, she pulled a face. Every time her mother made coffee, she found it too strong. This time wasn’t any different.
“You ought to stop making coffee, Mum. Honestly, it’s...horrible!”
“Well, don’t drink it if you don’t like it.”
The tone was brittle. Joanna immediately felt bad. She didn’t want to hurt her mother.
“We don’t have to fight so early.”
“You don’t need to tell me that.”
Yet her mother remained acrimonious. Joanna sighed, apologised then quickly moved onto the subject, her eyes on her mothers’.
“Fine, what is it you really want? I know full well you haven’t come here for a chat, for no reason.”
Lorelli smiled at her comment. She helped herself to a fresh cup of coffee and offered her daughter one, who quickly refused.