Use Me

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Use Me Page 10

by Kimberly Knight


  When I made it to the bar, I strolled right up to the wood top, took a seat and ordered a seven and seven. It wasn’t a beer night. I needed the extra alcohol content whiskey would provide. I needed to forget. It was crazy how I felt as though I was in the same bar, trying to forget some woman. Though this time, I was actually upset about it. Upset that Ashtyn’s lips might touch this guy. Her mouth might touch other parts of him, or he might get a taste of her. The whole situation made me angry. In hindsight, I should have just told her I wanted her date to be with me and only me.

  “Bad game for the Blackhawks.” Tommy set my drink in front of me. I handed my credit card to him. He stuck it in the cup by the register, knowing I was keeping my tab open.

  “Sure was,” I agreed.

  “You think they’re going all the way this season?”

  I shrugged then took a sip of my drink. For once I didn’t want to talk about hockey. In fact, I didn’t want to talk about anything which was weird because I didn’t want to be home alone either. I just wanted the alcohol to get into my system and put me at ease. “They have a good chance.”

  He nodded and went to help another patron while I gulped a few sips trying to better my mood. I was at the bottom of my glass when someone stood next to me. I turned and my day got worse.

  “You’ve got to be fucking shitting me!” I groaned through gritted teeth.

  “Just hear me out.”

  I stood, anger flooding my blood. Today was not the day. “There’s nothing to talk about, Bridgette. Just fucking leave me alone. It’s over.”

  “We have a problem here?” Tommy asked, standing directly behind the bar from us.

  “If you don’t leave, I will have Tommy call the cops,” I warned. A part of me wanted that to happen, but the other part could never do this to her. I just wanted her to leave me alone so I could move on. Move on to who was the question.

  “The cops don’t need to get involved,” Bridgette pleaded. “I just saw you were alone and figured you broke up with Ashtyn.”

  “Apparently they do because you won’t leave me alone.” I didn’t bother to correct her about Ashtyn. There was no point.

  “Because I love you and I want to make us work.”

  “You love me so much that you had to fuck another guy in my bed?”

  I saw Tommy out of the corner of my eye reach for the phone that was behind the bar. I shook my head slightly in his direction, and he set the handset back down.

  “I made a mistake,” Bridgette whined. “Please.”

  “Also you straight up told me that you were only with me so you could meet a hockey player. You think I’m stupid enough to take you back?”

  “I lied about that. I wanted to hurt you because—”

  “Because you got caught and you were the one heartbroken?”

  “I’m sorry. I made a mistake.”

  I stepped closer to her and got within inches of her body. My blood was on fire. I was done. So done. “I don’t give a fuck, and if I see your face one more time, even by a random accident, I will get a restraining order so fucking fast.”

  A tear slid down her cheek. “You won’t give me another chance?”

  “No. Now please leave. We’re done. You made that choice when you thought it would be okay for some other dude’s dick to be inside you.” What was funny was that was the best thing Bridgette could have done for me. I didn’t know it then, but looking back, she was just there going through the motions of life with me.

  Bridgette stared at me for a moment, and then she stormed off and out of the bar. Hopefully out of my life forever.

  “Hawks lost, and you have girl problems? Let me get you another.”

  I chuckled without sound as I watched Tommy grab the whiskey bottle. I sat back down and ran my hand through my finger-length hair. “I’m not even sure how it could get any worse.”

  Then as if life was laughing at me, he walked in laughing with his friends. Flashbacks of being a freshman entered my mind. He moved closer, and even though it had been almost twenty years since I’d seen him, I could pick out Corey Fucking Pritchett in a lineup. He still had that cocky smirk that showed his fucking dimple I wanted to stick a cigarette in. Though now, I was bigger and stronger. I wasn’t the toughest guy around, but looking at him walk in the door, I could tell that I was finally bigger than him. Except he wasn’t alone, and I was.

  He and his two friends walked toward the bar, and I turned back to Tommy, not wanting to make eye contact with Corey. I took two large gulps of the new seven and seven Tommy had made for me and willed it to work faster. Just as I was about to take another sip—a sip that would get me closer to finishing my drink so I could leave—I heard his voice. The voice that traumatized me as a kid.

  “Well, shit. As I live and breathe, boys, it’s Rhys Cole!”

  I closed my eyes, not turning toward him. Instead, I reached for my glass again.

  Someone—probably Corey—slapped me on the back. “I haven’t seen you in …”

  “Not long enough,” I spat, still not looking at him.

  “What, you’re too famous for your old high school pal?”

  I drank the rest of my drink and called to Tommy, “I’ll take my bill now.”

  Corey laughed. “You’re running like you did in high school?”

  I stood and once again got within inches of a person, my blood racing. I was now two inches taller than him, and after the day I’d had, I would love to smash his face in. “Like in high school?” I mocked. “You were a fucking prick in high school, and just like then, I want nothing to do with you.”

  “Here you go, Rhys,” Tommy said. I looked over to see he was trying to hand me my credit card, the bill, and a pen.

  “Aw, you running home to Mommy?”

  I took the stuff from Tommy and scribbled my name. Then I turned back to Corey. “You’re pushing forty now. Grow the fuck up.”

  “You ain’t shit, Cole. You may have taken my position on the ice in high school, but neither one of us made it to the pros.”

  I didn’t stop as I kept walking toward the door. Apparently, he was still bitter that I’d taken his starting position in high school. I had no idea what he did after high school, but if he were good enough, he would have been drafted. It wasn’t my fault.

  I assumed Corey would follow me and we’d fight. I was ready. My fists were clenched as I walked in the direction of my place, but when I turned around a few feet down the street, there was no one behind me. Snow started to cool my anger, and when I made it to my building, I took the elevator up to my floor wanting to crawl into bed and wake up in the morning to start a new day. A day that would hopefully be better. But as I made my way down the hall toward my door, I noticed someone sitting on the floor.

  “Cupcake.” I knelt down in front of her and saw tears streaming down her face. “What’s wrong?”

  Her teary eyes looked up at me. “I’m so stupid.”

  “Did that guy hurt you?” I brushed a tear away with my thumb as my heart clenched in my chest waiting for the answer. After today, I’d kill this guy especially for hurting the person I cared so much about.

  She shook her head. “No, but he was going to.”

  My blood that had thawed during my walk home in the snow started to boil again. “What do you mean?”

  “Everything was off about the date, and when I was going to the restroom to call Jaime so she could call me back and get me out of the date, I saw him slip something in my wine.”

  My heart stopped and my muscles tensed. “Did you drink it?”

  She balked. “Of course not! I left.”

  My body instantly relaxed and I moved to sit beside her. “Good.”

  “He knew about you and my ex.”

  “What?”

  Ashtyn shrugged. “He said he Facebook stalked me, but my profile has always been private. Plus, I deleted every picture of me and my ex.”

  “Maybe he did this before the day you met him?”

  “Oh,
and he’s the guy from Judy’s who tried to pick me up when you pretended to be my boyfriend.”

  “Hmmm …” I rubbed my chin as I tried to process everything she was saying. She rested her head on my shoulder, and I brought her closer to me. “So let me get this straight. The guy that came up to you at Judy’s the night we met is the same guy who you ran into getting coffee?” She nodded. “And he knows about your ex and obviously me?”

  “Well, I think he knows about you since he knew who you were that night too.”

  “But you deleted all old pictures of your ex on Facebook?” I never checked because I didn’t want to see if she had. We were only using each other for sex, and even though I wanted more with her, I couldn’t bring myself to look because I knew it would hurt since she obviously still had feelings for him.

  “Yes, and I’ve never posted anything personal on my business page.”

  “I never want you seeing that guy again,” I stated. I didn’t care that we were only friends. This guy seemed crazy, and I didn’t want anything to happen to her.

  “I won’t. I’m freaked out.” She looked up at me, her eyes red from crying. “Can I stay here tonight?”

  “Of course, Cupcake.” I stood and reached my hand down to help her up. “You can stay as long as you want.”

  We went inside my place and straight to bed. There was no stripping each other of clothes or touching of feverous hands. I loaned Ashtyn a T-shirt, and after I changed into pajama pants, we both crawled into the bed, and I held her spoon style. I was almost asleep when she spoke.

  “What if I wouldn’t have seen him put the shit in my wine, or what if he’d acted normal?”

  “I don’t think you should worry about that. You did see, and your instincts were on point.”

  “Almost a little too late.”

  “But you’re here now.”

  She sighed. “And I never want to leave.”

  I raised up and peered down at her. Ashtyn rolled to her back, and in the darkness I could faintly make out her face with the light coming from the clock on my nightstand. It was just enough for me to find her lips. I kissed her lightly. “Then don’t.”

  “I can’t just move in with you.”

  “I’m not asking you to move in with me. I’m asking you to be my girl.”

  “Your girl?”

  “Yeah, Cupcake. There’s not a chance I’ll ever let you go out with another man again, so you might as well be mine.”

  “Be yours? You’re ready to start dating again? Bridgette’s—”

  “Bridgette and I are over, and I want to be with you.”

  A slow smile curved her lips. “I want to be with you too.”

  “Good, and I promise to never drug you.”

  “Little too soon, babe.”

  “Sorry.” I rolled over onto my back.

  “Since we’re dating now, want to tell me about your night?”

  I sighed. Not really. “It actually kinda sucked.”

  “Really?” I felt her turn over to face me.

  “Well, for starters, the Blackhawks lost.”

  “Aw man.”

  “I know. And I went to Judy’s for a drink, and fucking Bridgette showed up.”

  “She did?”

  I nodded in the dark. “Told her that if I see her another time, I’ll get a restraining order.”

  “Good.”

  “Yeah,” I sighed. “Then my night got worse.”

  “How so?” She started making circles on my bare chest, and I never wanted her to stop.

  “Ran into my high school bully.”

  Her finger stopped. “You were bullied as a kid?”

  “I was bullied as a freshman,” I corrected. “The asshole liked to roam the halls and pick on those smaller than him. Got worse when coach made me starting center and not him.”

  “What happened tonight when you saw him?”

  I chuckled. “I called him old.”

  “You didn’t!” Ashtyn snorted and rolled to her back.

  “I did. I hadn’t seen him since I was a freshman and he was a senior, and tonight he was trying to act as though we’re best buds. He made some comment about me being on TV, and I was two seconds away from punching him in the face.”

  “But you didn’t?”

  I shook my head. “No. I told him to grow up, and I left.”

  Ashtyn moved again, but this time she placed her head on my bare chest. My arm went around her back, and I started to run my fingers along her arm. “I’m proud of you.”

  My heart swelled. “That means a lot, Cupcake.”

  She snuggled in closer to me. “Tonight was crazy for both of us.”

  “Yeah, it was.” I sighed, though falling asleep with Ashtyn in my arms was the best way to end a shitty day.

  A few days later, Ashtyn went to her parents’ for Thanksgiving, and I went to mine. Our parents only lived about twelve miles from each other. It was weird to think that the girl of my dreams lived so close to me growing up and I’d never met her.

  “Hello,” I called out, walking in through the front door. Instantly, the smell of turkey hit my nose and my stomach growled. Everyone knew you didn’t eat breakfast or lunch on Thanksgiving. It was all about the dinner, and this morning I worked up a sweat with Ashtyn before we’d parted ways, so I was extra hungry.

  “We’re in the kitchen,” Mom called back.

  My parents still lived in the two-story house I grew up in, and sometimes I missed living in a quiet neighborhood, but now I wouldn’t change it for the world. How many people could say they lived across the street from their girlfriend? This guy. And it was fucking awesome because I didn’t have to get in the car and drive thirty minutes or whatever to her place.

  I shut the door and made my way to the updated kitchen that looked out onto a giant backyard. My sister and her husband were already there, and when I rounded the corner, Romi rushed to me.

  “Is it true?” she asked, engulfing me in her arms.

  “Is what true?”

  “Are you dating Ashtyn Valor?”

  I broke free from her grasp and looked from her to my mom and back. “What the hell is the big deal about Ashtyn?”

  “Because she’s not that skank Bridgette.” She rolled her blue eyes that were just like mine.

  “Romi!” Mother scolded.

  “What? It’s true!”

  I nodded and agreed with my twenty-nine-year-old sister that still liked to gossip. “It is true.”

  “So are you and Ashtyn …?” She proceeded to prod me for the answer she was dying to hear.

  I chuckled. “Well, now we are.”

  “You are?” Mother stopped stirring something on the stove and looked at me with a huge smile spread across her face.

  “Yes,” I confirmed again as I reached for a carrot on the tray on the kitchen island.

  “That’s the best news I’ve heard all day,” my mother gushed.

  “We can top it,” Romi stated looking back at her husband with a huge smile on her face. “We’re pregnant!”

  Aw fuck. No doubt my mother was going to start hounding me more.

  Breaking News: Ashtyn Valor has moved on from Corey Pritchett and is now dating Rhys Cole—officially.

  The Monday after my horrible date with Philip, I arrived at work to hear twenty voicemails from him. I kid you not. Twenty!

  “Ashtyn, it’s Philip. Where’d you go?”

  “Ashtyn, it’s Philip again. I’m worried.”

  “It’s Philip again. Please let me know if you’re okay.”

  They kept going and going ...

  “The coat girl told me you left. You could have at least told me.”

  “You know what? Fuck you, bitch!”

  And finally …

  “I only wanted to fuck you anyway. You’re probably a lousy lay.”

  I saved every single one just in case something were to ever happen to me, but didn’t tell anyone. What was there to tell? I didn’t know his last name or anything a
bout him, and he technically never did anything to me. It was too late for them to test if there was anything in the wine. He also stopped calling after that day.

  Thank God.

  Like clockwork, Abby walked up to my desk with a flower delivery. “They’re black,” I stated, looking at the bouquet in her hands.

  “I know! Crazy huh?”

  I’d never seen a black rose in person before now. I pulled the card from the middle of the flowers after Abby set them on my desk.

  I had no idea what the note actually meant, but the black roses were beautiful, and even though they didn’t say they were from SA, I knew they were.

  Once again, I showed up alone to Thanksgiving at my parents. This year I had planned to bring Corey with me. Obviously, that was no longer the case, and since Rhys and I had just officially started dating, we decided to stick with our original plans and do our own Thanksgivings. It was a little too soon to meet the family even though for the past three nights I’d stayed over at his place because I was scared to be alone. Tonight would be no different because we had plans to meet up after dinner.

  “Are you doing okay?” my mom asked, giving me a one-armed hug as I peeled potatoes.

  “I’m fine.” I smiled.

  “Are you doing okay after everything with Corey?” Her hazel eyes squinted a little as she frowned, sad for me.

  “Now I am.”

  She perked up at my omission. “Good. And what about that young man who does the shows before the Blackhawks games?”

  “Rhys Cole.” My grin grew wider just thinking about him.

  “Yes, him. I saw your picture on Facebook.”

  “Everyone saw that picture.” I laughed. Probably even Philip … somehow.

  “He’s very handsome.”

  “Then if I tell you that we’re dating, you’ll be happy?”

  Her eyes widened, and she smiled. “Yes.”

  “Then we’re dating.”

  “Who are you dating?” my sister-in-law Jessica asked. She was married to my older brother Ethan.

  I turned to her, a potato in my hand, and proceeded to tell them that Rhys and I had just started to date after weeks of talking. That conversation led to my dad and brothers begging me to get them free tickets to a Blackhawks game until it was time to eat. Now that I was dating someone in the industry they assumed I had perks. I wasn’t even sure if Rhys could get free tickets, so I just told them I’d see what I could do.

 

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