It couldn’t be that he kept his feelings from her. Aside from his admissions where Bill and his mother were concerned at least. She’d never asked for any pretty words, and never burdened him with any from her. He was the one who’d almost said he loved her. Thank God he hadn’t made that mistake. Maybe those were just words, but they could do a lot of damage. That jerk Adam had probably promised her the friggin’ moon when they were together.
He wasn’t about to make promises he didn’t intend to keep. All right. He wasn’t a guy who ever made promises at all. They’d never talked about love or commitment. Hell, he’d never talked about what he was going to do next month let alone next year.
He had to keep his focus on what he wanted. Career. Proving himself. Chapman was everything. That has been his goal for years now. He closed his eyes. He wouldn’t think about it. If Harmony said she was busy, she was busy. He’d never met anyone like her before, honest and upfront about everything. She wouldn’t start playing games now.
He wouldn’t play them with her, either. That was for damn sure. He’d take his cue from her and give her space. He wouldn’t lose sight of his ultimate goal. Harmony’s face filled his mind for an instant, her smile, her laugh. The sweet way she’d loved him last night.
Just for tonight he’d allow himself to think about something other than Chapman and the damn corporate ladder.
Tomorrow would come soon enough.
Chapter 16
After that awkward discussion outside the Institute Harmony hadn’t seen much of Rick. It had been a full three weeks, actually. He’d probably been busy seeing the snack bar completed and she’d been tied up with her own work. It was none of his business if she chose to avoid him. It was getting harder and harder to think about him after what Tiffany had told her. But tonight was Christmas Eve. She didn’t want to spend the night without him.
As if on cue, she heard the crunch of dirt and gravel beneath wide tires. Her heart skipped a beat in spite of her resolve as she stepped over to the door. She wore a thin red buttoned sweater over a pair of jeans, and nervously ran her hands over her sleeves before opening the door.
She’d strung little twinkling lights over the cabin and a few of the trees nearby, and the light seemed to dance over his hair, his face. He looked a touch apprehensive, nothing like the cock-sure guy he usually presented. He shifted the bottle of wine he carried from one hand to the other, a tentative smile on his lips.
She smiled in response. She didn’t turn him away, but for a second there she wished she had the willpower to do so.
“Merry Christmas,” he said quickly. He held up a bottle of wine. “I thought we could share this.”
She nodded and let him in. He glanced past her into the room, looking for what? she couldn’t guess. He seemed relieved that the table was set for one.
He set the bottle down and looked around the cabin. “I’m kind of surprised you’re here.”
“Ariel and Max are up in Orlando for the week,” she said. “Mom really makes a killing selling her organic pumpkin bread to the tourists. We’ll get together tomorrow night.”
He took off his jacket and draped it over a chair, rolling his shoulders as he did so. He almost seemed nervous. “I’m glad I stopped by, then.”
She opened her mouth to tell she’d been all but wishing he’d come by, but finally nodded. “I am, too.”
“Look, Harmony,” he began. “I’m no good at this. I don’t know what’s been going on the past couple of weeks, but—”
“Don’t you?” she cut in.
He blinked at her for a moment, then frowned. “Look, I’m not the one playing games here.”
She laughed, but it wasn’t a happy sound to her ears. “Games. You think I’m playing games.”
He sat down and ran his fingers through his hair. “No, I… I don’t know what I think. But look. It’s Christmas. I wanted to spend it with you. No games.”
She studied him for a moment. He seemed sincere, his gaze open. He looked good, wearing tan khakis and a cream fisherman sweater she wanted to rip right off him. Why not indulge herself this one last time? It was Christmas Eve. Maybe there’d be nothing in her stocking tomorrow. But she’d have Rick tonight. And if she lost a little bit more of her heart, who would it hurt besides herself?
“I want to spend tonight with you, too,” she said.
He had the grace to look surprised even if he wasn’t. He had to know that the minute she saw him there on her doorstep she’d wanted to jump his bones. It had been weeks since she’d been with him. More than her heart ached with the memory of their nights together. Her cheeks heated and she turned to the fridge.
“I hope you don’t mind frozen turkey dinners,” she said.
She’d bought two. Funny.
“Anything is fine,” he said.
He opened the wine and she grabbed another glass from the cupboard. As she drank she set aside any lingering doubts about spending another night with him. Those fingers that curled around his wine glass, those eyes that sparkled at her. They ate their meals quickly. That was a relief, as she doubted she’d make it through dessert before throwing herself at him.
“The rec café is almost finished.” He put their empty dinner trays next to the sink. “You have to come take a look.”
Okay. Work. That helped her focus. She poured some coffee into a mug and handed it to him. “Why?”
He looked hurt, but that couldn’t be right. “No reason, I guess. I just thought you’d be curious.”
She was. Dying of it, really. She’d heard the construction that began early each morning, the whine of saws and the thrum of hammers faint from a couple of miles away. She knew from Dr. Robbins that the trails were all marked and in place. She just hadn’t hiked them yet. She couldn’t bring herself that close.
“I’m sure it’s everything you promised the developers, Rick.” She took her coffee and sat back down at the little table. “It’ll make Chapman’s investors happy, too.”
“Yeah.” He stared into his mug. “Happy.”
He seemed young again, like the night they’d met Bill and Tiffany for dinner. Vulnerable. She wouldn’t think of him that way, needing her comfort when he had his money, his career, and God knew how many women in Boston to keep him warm.
“What’s next for you?” she asked, using the same words he’d given her before.
He shrugged and drank from his mug. “Back to Boston after the New Year.”
She sipped her coffee, ignoring the sting as it burned her tongue. “Oh.”
He put down his mug and grabbed her free hand. “I don’t want to talk about Boston, Harmony. I don’t want to talk about anything but you and me.”
Her heart began to pound. “You and me?”
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it. “Tonight, sweetheart. Together.”
Oh. Tonight. Right. She willed her heart to slow and placed her mug on the table.
“That’s what I want, too,” she said. “Tonight.”
Climbing into his lap, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. She stripped that sweater off him, taking a moment to breathe in his scent on the warm wool before letting it fall to the floor. His lips were urgent on her throat, her neck, as he pulled off her cardigan. He held her close against him, pressing against her center as she sighed his name.
“Ah, baby.” The tip of his tongue played with the lace edge of her bra as he worked her jeans down her legs. “Harmony… ”
He stood and tumbled her onto the bed and she put everything out her mind. His motives might not have been clear when she’d first slept with him. Even that last time they slept together, when he’d shown her his vulnerability and a tiny piece of his heart.
Soon she thought of nothing but the feel of his hands on her skin. Her name on his lips as he kissed her everywhere.
Tonight she had no illusions. It was just sex, like it should have been from the beginning. Let her body have its way. Let her heart break again tomorrow.
***
“It’s finished.”
Rick waited for his father’s response, holding the BlackBerry tight to his ear. His father said nothing for a long minute. Rick didn’t say more. It was bad enough he needed Bill’s approval. He’d be damned if he was going to beg for it.
“Good work, Chapman,” Bill finally said. “I’ve been thinking. Since our visit I’ve realized you’re worth something to Chapman Financial. More than I gave you credit for.”
He held his breath. This was what he’d been waiting for. This was why he busted his ass down here in Florida for the last few weeks.
“And?” he asked.
“Come back to Boston, Rick. The top position is yours.”
He closed his eyes and fisted his free hand at his side. He’d done it. At last.
“Thanks,” he managed to say.
“See you in the office on Monday.”
Bill broke the connection and Rick took a breath. Yes! Wait. Monday? That was only three days away. He had to talk to Harmony. She’d been different Christmas Eve, remote. But only at first. By the time they’d made it to her bed she’d been the warm, giving, passionate woman he’d known from the first.
“Boston,” he said to himself. “Chapman. Everything.”
He sank down into the leather couch. Yeah, everything. Money and prestige and all he’d strived for. But was it worth it? Could he leave what he had here with Harmony for what he knew awaited him in Boston? Which Harmony would he find when he told her about the promotion? The woman who kept herself too busy to see him and kept herself out of his bed? Or the one who begged him so sweetly to take her more than once the last time they were together?
“Damned if I know,” he said. He came to his feet. “But I’m going to find out.”
He found her at her camp, sitting at the end of the dock as the sunset danced over her. She hugged her knees to her chest, her back to him, and stared at nothing he could see. Or at everything, if he took in the big picture.
Trees dripping moss, birds flying low over the water, ripples on the lake from the breeze that kicked up. Cypress Corners might have been hot as hell in October but it was unbelievably comfortable by the end of the year.
Boston would be cold. Frozen and gray and heavy-skied above the soaring Chapman building. But it was home. Wasn’t it?
“Harmony,” he said.
She turned, just looked over her shoulder and gave him a small smile. She didn’t seem surprised to see him. What did that smile mean? Happiness? Regret? Resignation? He wouldn’t guess, not with his own emotions muddled.
“Hi, Rick.”
She didn’t get up as he walked toward her, his sneakers making no sound on the smooth planks of the dock. He’d miss her place, that was for sure. He sniffed the pines and the scent he would recognize as hers until the day he died.
“I have something to tell you.” He settled beside her and mimicked her pose. “I’m going back to Boston.”
She blinked and faced him, and a trick of the waning light made her eyes unreadable. “Oh? When?”
“I have to be at work on Monday.”
She made a little sound in the back of her throat, like a hiccup, and nodded. “At Chapman. Working for your father.”
He couldn’t look at her. She knew how pitiful he was, then. Kowtowing to his father for any scrap of recognition. But the money and prestige… His mother’s words still echoed in his mind. To prove himself a better man than Bill Chapman could ever be. This was all he knew. What he’d always wanted.
“Yeah,” he said. “I’m the new Executive Officer in Charge of Foreign and Domestic Investments.”
She didn’t look terribly impressed at the title as she nodded again. “Congratulations. I know you’ve worked hard for this.”
Her voice was flat, her body still. He needed some reaction from her. Something to show that she’d felt something for him these past weeks.
“Tell me what you really think, Harmony,” he said. “Don’t sit there staring at me like I don’t know you at all.”
She blinked. “What?”
He stood and looked down at her. “Don’t look at me like we haven’t made love a hundred different ways until I know your body as well as my own.”
She jumped to her feet and flung her hair out of her eyes. “Wait a minute.”
Good. Now she looked angry, and he welcomed the change.
“Don’t come here, telling me what to do, Rick,” she said. “What do you want me to say? ‘Oh, don’t go?’ ‘Stay here with me forever?’ Well, I’m not going to be the fool again.”
He knew it. She thought he was like Adam, that jerk.
“You’re not a fool,” he ground out. “Just because one man broke your heart—”
“Adam didn’t break my heart,” she said. “And you won’t either, believe me.”
Chapter 17
Rick just stared at her. Harmony took a breath and held herself in check. She had to be strong. Not think about anything but letting him go. For him. For herself.
“Your work is important to you,” she said. “I know that. I’ve always known that, from the day you stepped onto the ant pile. What I don’t know is why you’re putting all this on me.”
He took a step closer and she braced herself.
“Damn it, Harmony.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “I thought we had something here.”
She shook her head. So did she. “You might be able to fool me, Rick. But don’t fool yourself.”
He grabbed her arms and she couldn’t move. Not from the force of his grip but from the look in his eyes. If she didn’t know better she’d think he really had feelings for her beyond the sexual.
“We’re good together,” he said.
She fought to keep her control. Her throat was tight, her heart racing.
He drew her closer. “I don’t want to lose what we have.”
That did it. She had to break free now, or she would be his fool forever.
“What do we have, Rick?” she wrenched away from him and rubbed her arms where his fingers had been. She’d never be able to erase the memory of his touch. “Tell me what we have. Because I didn’t see that it was anything but sex when it was convenient.”
He cursed softly. “I know I haven’t said the words, but—”
“Don’t say them now,” she warned, covering her ears. She brought her hands down slowly. “You’ve never lied to me. Don’t start now.”
She couldn’t face him any longer, not with the hurt in his eyes and her heart in hers. Turning, she focused on a weed tangling around the dock platform beneath her.
She felt him step closer and steeled herself for whatever might come next.
“Come to Boston with me,” he said.
Oh, God. She hadn’t expected this. “No,” she whispered.
He was silent behind her. She could hear him breathing, could smell that Rick-scent that would always mark him as the last man to ever break her heart.
“That’s it?” he asked. “Just, ‘no?’”
What else could she say? Her parents needed her. They needed the money. To pay them back, she needed her job. She had to stay here. He had to go back.
There were no two ways about it, even if some lovesick jerk had temporarily taken over Rick’s body. He’d be long gone before the plane touched down in Boston.
She faced him again, her arms crossed over her chest. “You need to go back, Rick. I don’t. You need everything your father is offering.”
She saw it in his face as his mouth thinned. She could almost hear the denial he wanted to make. But he couldn’t deny it, not to her who knew just what Chapman Financial meant to him.
“You need the money and all it buys you,” she went on. “Your new position, the recognition.”
“But that doesn’t…” His voice trailed off.
She wouldn’t help him. Couldn’t help him take a step he’d regret within a week.
“That doe
sn’t what?” she asked. “Doesn’t matter?” She blinked rapidly to stop the tears before he could see them. “It’s everything to you. And nothing to me.”
“Harmony.” His voice broke. “I can’t change. I… I have to do this.”
His eyes were a soft gray now, deep and sad. It would pass. He’d throw himself into his work and today would be a memory for him.
“I’m not asking you to change. We’re different. You have your job there and I have my responsibilities here. End of story.”
“Just like that?” He swallowed. “Just like that, you can let this go?”
She feigned an indifference she hadn’t ever felt where he was concerned. “Why not? It was nice while it lasted, but I’m not going to lose any sleep over it.”
He grabbed her again and for one long minute she let herself be held by the man she loved. His hands pressed against her spine, his heart beating against her cheek as she closed her eyes. But he wasn’t really here. The man she loved didn’t really exist at all.
“Tell me to stay, Harmony.” He kissed her hair, her temple. “Tell me to stay and I will.”
God, how she wanted to. But there was no place in Cypress Corners for him. She knew it if he didn’t. He needed this job. He wanted this more than anything. She knew that. The tenderness in his eyes would soon fade if she made him give up his big chance.
“Go,” she whispered. “Go and be happy.”
He sucked in a breath and released her. “Fine. I’ll go.”
She watched him with a steady gaze as he stepped away from her. Then he turned away and she nearly cried out with relief. A few more steps and he was in the SUV. Another minute and he was driving away from her.
By Monday he’d be back in Boston, making deals and earning the money that would one day show Bill Chapman what he was worth. Maybe he’d think about her once in a while, when he was lonely or had a free night. But he’d never know what she felt. He’d never know he was worth so much more than money and deals to her. He was worth everything.
Cypress Corners Boxed Set (Books 1-3) Page 13