A Baby for Christmas

by Joanna Sims

  “Quit bossing me around, Luke! I’m not one of your men. I don’t worship the ground you walk on! I’m not mandated to follow every little word you say as if it’s the holy gospel, and I’m not just going to jump because you order me to do it....”

  “Eight seconds. Seven. Six.” He gave her a questioning look. “Five...”

  “All right!” she whispered harshly and waved her hand. “All right! Put that stupid thing down.”

  “Talk.” Luke sat down heavily in the chair and waited.

  Sophia muttered, “I still don’t like your tone.”

  “Sophia...”

  “Or that you are speaking to me like I’m a toddler. I’m not a child!”

  Luke went to stand up. “That’s it...”

  Sophia made a hand gesture for him to remain sitting. “Will you quit rushing me? You’re always rushing me!”

  “Pregnant or not, I’m gonna kick your butt right out of my room if you don’t start talking. You’ve worn me out, woman....”

  Sophia clasped her hands together; she knew that her stall tactics weren’t working. It was time to come clean with Luke. So she did.

  “You were right. I have been upset....”

  “You mentioned that.”

  She glanced up at him; she had his unwavering attention. “I miss you.”

  “How can you miss me if I haven’t gone anywhere? I’m right here.”

  She felt emotionally deflated and her body sank lower onto the mattress as her shoulders drooped. “You treat me differently now. I miss how things were between us before your family came back. I miss that.”

  She waited for him to respond, but he just sat there and stared at her. She added, “Your turn.”

  “I’m thinking,” Luke said in a biting tone. Then, after a moment, he said, “You know, you’re really pissing me off right now, and I really need to think about what I’m going to say because I don’t want to fight with you.”

  “I don’t want to fight with you either,” she interrupted him. “And I wasn’t trying to piss you off. Why are you pissed off?”

  Luke rubbed his hands several times over his shorn hair and blew out a breath. “Because, Sophia,” he said in a slow, measured voice, “I’ve done everything I can think of to make you happy, to make things right between us, to treat you how you want to be treated. I walk on goddamn eggshells all the frickin’ time for you; I’m on pins and needles constantly for you, and yet... It’s not enough. You’re still not happy. You’re still upset! What the hell do you want from me? Tell me now. What the hell do you want from me!”

  “I want you, Luke,” she said simply. Honestly. “That’s what I want. You.”

  “You have me. You’ve always had me. Haven’t you been paying attention these last couple of weeks?”

  “Ever since the...barn...you’ve treated me like...” She paused to think of the right word. “Like we’ve never had anything between us. You avoid me like the plague, and when we do see each other, you do everything you can not to touch me. Don’t think I haven’t noticed, Luke, because I have.”

  These words moved Luke to action. He stood up and marched over to her. “I’m sorry. I don’t think I heard you correctly. Have you woken me up in the middle of the night to complain about the fact that I don’t touch you enough?”

  “Yes.” She felt like a lunatic.

  “Unbelievable.” Luke’s eyes blazed with emotion. “You’re unbelievable!”

  Luke started to pace; his limp was barely noticeable now. He paused for a moment and addressed her. “Let me get this straight. You’ve been trying to get me to treat you like we’re ‘just friends’ since the moment I arrived here, and now that I’m finally complying with your wishes and demands, you...don’t...like...it?” His tone was incredulous. “You have gotten everything your way, and you still aren’t happy? This is priceless! And you wonder why I’m a chauvinist! Women are nuts!”

  She supposed he had a right to be a little caustic at this point. She was acting nuts. “I admit that in the beginning, that’s what I wanted. But, honestly, I think that I was just trying to push you away because I was afraid of how I was feeling about you....”

  “Jesus, woman! Will you lay off the frickin’ psychobabble for one second, please?”

  “Understanding the psychological motivation behind our actions is the cornerstone of change,” Sophia said with a lift of her chin. “Plus, it’s my profession. Analyzing emotions is my stock-in-trade.”

  Luke looked up at the ceiling, lifted his hands in the air and said, “Shoot me now, Lord. Just shoot me now!”

  Not deterred, Sophia continued. “I just want to know why you’re treating me like you don’t have any feelings for me at all! Why are you pushing me away?”

  “Why am I pushing you away?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why am I pushing you away?” he asked again, loudly.

  “Shhhh.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Yes, Luke. Why are you pushing me away?”

  “You know what, Sophia? I’m flat-out tired of all of this crap with you. You want to know why I’m pushing you away? Fine! I’ll tell you. Why not? What do I have to lose? I’m treating you like a friend to keep myself in check, you get it? I treat you like a friend who’s off-limits so I don’t cross the line. You should be thanking me instead of sitting here busting my balls about it!”

  “Cross what line?”

  “You’re the shrink. You figure it out.”

  “I want to hear it from you.”

  Luke crossed the room to her and pulled her gently to a stand. His fingers were in her hair as he tilted her head so they were gazing into each other’s eyes. She could see that Luke was warring within himself; he was very close to kissing her, and she was very close to letting him. Instead, he said, “I’ve wanted you for ten years. Ten years. That’s a hell of a lot of pent-up desire, woman. I want you all the time, get it? Whenever I see you, I want to put my hands on you. Put my hands all over you. You’re just so damn sexy and you think I should be turned off because you’re pregnant. But you’re sexy as hell like this, too. You drive me nuts, do you get that? I have to fight not to strip you down and put my lips on every damn inch of your body. Do you hear what I’m saying to you, Sophia? I want you so much it hurts. I want you in my bed. Naked. All the time. I want to be able to touch you whenever I damn well please. I want to kiss you whenever I damn well please. This is what you do to me.” Luke pressed himself against her, and there was no mistaking that he was aroused. Luke watched as realization dawned in her eyes before he spoke again. “That—” and they both knew what that was “—is why I have a strict hands-off policy with you, Sophia. Are we clear now?” He stepped away from her. “Because if I don’t keep a barrier between us, I’ll take advantage of your confusion and make love to you every damn chance I get. I’ll talk you out of your clothes and into my bed before you know what hit you!” His voice lowered to a lover’s caress. “Don’t think I can’t.”

  Luke’s eyes dropped down to her lips. Speechless, she licked them involuntarily. She cleared her throat and tried to keep herself focused on the conversation. He was making it nearly impossible to think, much less form a coherent sentence. “And then everything would be ruined.”

  “What?” His eyes drifted back up to hers.

  “You’re afraid that you’ll take advantage of me, we’ll make love and then in the morning, I’ll regret it and everything will be ruined with Danny.”

  “That’s part of it,” he said in a quiet, husky voice.

  “What’s the other part?”

  “You just can’t leave well enough alone, can you? You just keep pushing and pushing....”

  “This conversation had to happen.”

  Luke stared at her for several heartbeats; resignation flickered in his eyes just before he spoke. “I’m in love with you, Sophia. What part of that don’t you understand? Do you think because I’m a man, that I’m a marine, I don’t have any feelings? Do you think I like the fact that th
e woman I love, the woman I’ve always loved, doesn’t love me back? I’m protecting myself from how I feel about you, because for me it’s a matter of survival. I didn’t know your permission was required.”

  Sophia put her hand on his arm. “Luke, you don’t have to protect yourself from me. I’m not trying to hurt you.”

  “You can’t help yourself.” He pulled away from her.

  His gesture stung, but it didn’t deter her. She continued even though he had his back turned to her. “I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along the way, sometime during the week we spent alone, I fell in love with you, Luke.”

  If she thought that he was going to take her in his arms and hug her when he heard those words, she was sadly mistaken. Luke slowly spun around and looked at her. That stony mask was back in place, but his eyes were flashing with pent-up rage.

  “Get out of my room,” Luke bit out through gritted teeth and pointed to the door.

  “Didn’t you hear what I said? I’m in love with you.” She said it more clearly, more decisively.

  “I heard you,” he snapped. “Now get out!”

  “You stand there and tell me that I’m never going to love you back. I’m telling you that I’m in love with you, and now you’re kicking me out?”

  “Do you think that this is a game? A joke? You’re not in love with me. You’re in love with Dan! You always have been—no doubt you always will be. And I am not going to be some cheap substitution for my own twin. Do you hear me? I’m not going to be some pathetic second string that’s suddenly in the game now because the first string got annihilated! I may be a lot of things, Sophia, but I sure as hell ain’t no runner-up to Dan!” Luke’s fists were balled up at his sides. “I’m nobody’s stand-in.”

  “Is that what you think? That I want you to be a stand-in for Daniel? That’s not it at all, Luke. I love Daniel, but...”

  “I’m aware of that,” he snapped.

  “Will you let me finish, please?”

  “Go ahead.”

  “I’ll always love Daniel....”

  “Do you think this is news to me or something, sweetheart? ’Cause it ain’t,” Luke interrupted her again.

  “Dammit, Luke! Stop interrupting me. I’m trying to tell you that I’m in love with you. Do you get that, Captain Brand? I’m in love with you! Not Daniel. I love him. I always will, but as your mom put it so eloquently, ‘being in love is for the living.’ She’s right. Being in love is for the living, and I’m in love with you.”

  “You’re in no condition to know how you feel, Sophia. I look like Dan, you’re confused, nothing more. And I’m not about to put myself in a position to have you wake up to that fact one month, two months, one year down the road. I’m not going to put myself out there like that. I’m not going to set myself up for that kind of fall. Do you hear me?”

  “First of all, you don’t even look that much like Daniel. I can’t imagine why I ever thought you did. Your nose has that crooked thing going on, you have that scar on your jaw...” She reached up and traced the jagged white scar. “Probably from a bar fight, knowing you. And your eyes are a darker shade of blue with gold flecks around the iris. Second of all, I’d appreciate it if you’d quit throwing my pregnancy in my face! I’m pregnant, not brain-dead. I know my own mind, Luke....”

  “Do you?”

  “Yes! And I know my own heart. I’m in love with you. If you choose not to believe it, that’s your problem. Not mine. The ball’s in your court now.”

  Luke grabbed her left hand and held it up between them. “If you’re so in love with me, why do you still have your wedding ring on?”

  Sophia waited a minute for Luke to focus in on her finger and see that the wedding ring had been removed. Luke was so accustomed to being right, she truly enjoyed watching as it dawned on him that he was wrong.

  Luke sought out her eyes. “When did you take it off?”

  “Yesterday.” She reached up and rested her hand on his face. “How can I wear Daniel’s wedding ring when I’m in love with you? It would be a lie, and I’m not a liar.”

  Luke spun her around so her back was against the bedroom door. He placed his hands on each side of her, trapped her between his arms. His stormy blue eyes held her captive.

  “You’re in love with me?” Luke’s lips were so close that his breath mingled with hers.

  “Yes.” Her voice had a soft, sensual quality; her knees felt weak. The scent of his warm skin was making her feel intoxicated.

  Suddenly she was engulfed in his arms and his face was buried in her neck. She felt his lips on her skin, and the feel of his mouth on her flesh sent an electrical current racing through her body.

  “I play for keeps,” he growled as his lips found another spot on her neck. Her knees buckled and her pulse skyrocketed. Luke felt her sway; he held her closer and pressed himself against her possessively.

  “So do I.”

  “I don’t believe I gave you a proper New Year’s kiss....”

  Her heart was thumping in her chest. She licked her lips. “No. I don’t believe you did.”

  Sophia closed her eyes as Luke’s lips captured hers. She surrendered into his steely arms as Luke took possession of her mouth with his. Every nerve ending in her body ignited wherever his body touched hers.

  “Do you have any idea how long I’ve waited to make you mine?” Luke abandoned her mouth as he reached for the belt on her robe and tugged it loose. He slowly opened her robe and slipped it off her shoulders. As it fell silently onto the ground at her feet, she felt completely exposed. Did he mean to make love to her right this minute? She was huge! She couldn’t imagine it....

  “Beautiful,” Luke murmured. His eyes swept her body before they rejoined hers. “My God, you’re gorgeous.” He buried his nose back into her neck. “You smell so damned good, Soph.” He brought his lips back to hers. “You taste so damned good.”

  “Luke...I don’t think that we should...” She pushed lightly on his chest; she felt overwhelmed by his passion for her.

  Luke put his finger against her lips. “Shhhh. We aren’t going to do anything that you don’t want to do. I’m not going to hurt you or the baby.” He moved his hand possessively down her body until his hand was on her belly. “But, my God, Sophia. I have to touch you. I have to taste you....”

  She reached up for his face, relieved. “Yes. Yes.” She said in a silken voice that she hardly recognized. “Yes.”

  Her last yes was cut off as his lips captured hers again. His fingers were in her hair, on her neck, down her back as he claimed her with his strong, unyielding lips. He kissed her again and again until she couldn’t tell where his breath ended and hers began. She melted into his arms, felt herself let go of her well-constructed control, and kissed him back as forcefully as he was kissing her. She gave in to him, and claimed him in the very same way he was laying claim to her.

  “Get in my bed,” he growled against her lips.

  His command was so masculine, so sensual, that she found herself complying without putting up her usual fight. She wanted to be in his bed. She wanted to be in his arms. She wanted to be his woman.

  Once in his bed, she lay on her back feeling incredibly aroused, insecure and ridiculous. Her body was humming with desire and she was so horny she felt herself writhe on the bed; she needed a release that had been such a long time coming.

  Luke’s eyes never left her as he stripped out of his jeans. She could see the evidence of his desire for her straining against the thin material of his boxers. It was obvious that he wanted her as much as she wanted him.

  He was at her side now; he pressed his body against her. His fingers unbuttoned the buttons at the top of her nightgown. She sucked in her breath as his fingers slipped into her nightgown and cupped her full, warm breast. She arched her back against his hand, helpless to protest.

  “Look at me.” Luke hovered above her, his lips so close to hers as he spoke. “I want to make love to you, Sophia. Do you want me to love you?
”

  “Yes,” she said without hesitation. “But look at me. I’m in no condition to make love. I’m huge. I feel ridiculous.”

  Luke’s lips found the swell of her breast. “There are many ways for a man to satisfy a woman. All you have to do is let me....”

  Sophia closed her eyes and moaned as his mouth moved to her nipple. As he began to suckle, she pressed her hand to the back of his head and moaned louder.

  “Let me show you how much I love you...” Luke released her nipple.

  She was squirming now, wanting, needing. “I need you, Luke. Please. I need you.”

  “Your wish is my command.”

  Luke’s lips found hers as his hand slipped beneath her nightgown and traveled slowly up her thighs. “Open for me. Let me in,” he said against her lips; after a moment she complied, relaxed as his fingers found her.

  She reached down between them and slipped her hand into his boxers. Luke moaned her name into her neck as her fingers closed over his rock-hard erection.

  He pulled her tightly toward him and grazed the skin of her neck with his teeth. “I’ve waited a lifetime for you, Sophia. A lifetime.”

  She couldn’t speak. She couldn’t respond. All she could do was writhe against the warmth of his hand as he gave her the release that she had been craving.

  “Luke.” She gasped his name as she climaxed. “Luke.”

  “I love you, Sophia. God, I love you so damned much.” Luke’s words were groaned into her neck; his erection stiffened and then pulsated in her hand as he found his own release.

  Chapter Fifteen

  A week later the entire Brand family was gathered at the hospital to witness Sophia give birth to a healthy seven-pound, two-ounce baby boy. Luke and Barbara had been in the room for the birth while Hank, Tyler and Jordan kept themselves occupied with burned coffee and snacks from the vending machines. Luke held Sophia’s hand during the delivery, cut the cord and, once Sophia had drifted off to sleep, made a beeline for the baby. Barbara stood arm in arm with her eldest son as they admired the latest addition to the Brand clan. “Just look at my first grandchild! He looks just like the two of you when you were born!” Barb said with pride. “He’s the spitting image of his father and his uncle.”