I can’t go on, I’ll go on

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I can’t go on, I’ll go on Page 41

by Richard W. Seaver


  Lessness

  Sans, as this work was called in its original French, is another of those brief “fragments” culled from the void that marks Beckett’s prose efforts in the years following How It Is. (“Fragment” of course is the wrong term, for it implies a piece broken from a larger whole, and here the work, though brief, is complete in itself.)

  Having read the original when it was written in 1969, I was somewhat surprised, when Beckett sent his translation the following year, to find that he had chosen as title Lessness. And yet the nuance is important for a number of reasons: first, it is more poetic than the more literal “without”; second, it is less final; and third, though sans occurs sixty times in the original, Beckett’s title enabled him to use throughout the English text various words ending in “-less,” notably “endlessness,” which slows the movement and gives a whole new cadence to the English version.

  Lessness was written immediately following Ping (when speaking of Beckett’s work, one must always qualify; the “immediately” refers to “directly”; in time-terms, it followed Ping by three years). In many ways it resembles that 1966 work, but there are significant differences. Like Ping, the units of “thought” are the short phrases, the gasps of meaning (or nonmeaning), repeated and combined in new ways throughout. (The parallels with musical composition increase from work to work.) Here Beckett uses paragraph and sentence, but he uses them for good reason. Lessness is composed of twenty-four paragraphs, varying in length (that is, number of words) but each of seven sentences. As far as numbers are concerned, we are in the realm of human time.

  As far as light, gray; setting, “ruins,” which also appear to be “refuge”; as for characters, one, also gray. Upright.

  Music has been evoked: this is one of the most musical of Beckett’s works, and much of its power derives from its musicality, its permutations and variations on the same theme. Like music, the work produces a dual effect, that is, both instantaneous and cumulative, as the echoes of the earlier variations reverberate in the mind as one reads the later.

  The work cries to be read aloud; in fact, it has close and obvious parallels with some of Beckett’s stage and radio plays. At one point the author apparently decided that it should be spoken, and it was performed on radio several times. But Beckett is said not to have been happy with the results, for the six different voices called for were too different: this is a piece for a single voice.

  Ruins true refuge long last towards which so many false time out of mind. All sides endlessness earth sky as one no sound no stir. Grey face two pale blue little body heart beating only upright. Blacked out fallen open four walls over backwards true refuge issueless.

  Scattered ruins same grey as the sand ash grey true refuge. Four square all light sheer white blank planes all gone from mind. Never was but grey air timeless no sound figment the passing light. No sound no stir ash grey sky mirrored earth mirrored sky. Never but this changelessness dream the passing hour.

  He will curse God again as in the blessed days face to the open sky the passing deluge. Little body grey face features slit and little holes two pale blue. Blank planes sheer white eye calm long last all gone from mind.

  Figment light never was but grey air timeless no sound. Blank planes touch close sheer white all gone from mind. Little body ash grey locked rigid heart beating face to endlessness. On him will rain again as in the blessed days of blue the passing cloud. Four square true refuge long last four walls over backwards no sound.

  Grey sky no cloud no sound no stir earth ash grey sand. Little body same grey as the earth sky ruins only upright. Ash grey all sides earth sky as one all sides endlessness.

  He will stir in the sand there will be stir in the sky the the air the sand. Never but in dream the happy dream only one time to serve. Little body little block heart beating ash grey only upright. Earth sky as one all sides endlessness little body only upright. In the sand no hold one step more in the endlessness he will make it. No sound not a breath same grey all sides earth sky body ruins.

  Slow black with ruin true refuge four walls over backwards no sound. Legs a single block arms fast to sides little body face to endlessness. Never but in vanished dream the passing hour long short. Only upright little body grey smooth no relief a few holes. One step in the ruins in the sand on his back in the endlessness he will make it. Never but dream the days and nights made of dreams of other nights better days. He will live again the space of a step it will be day and night again over him the endlessness.

  In four split asunder over backwards true refuge issueless scattered ruins. Little body little block genitals overrun arse a single block grey crack overrun. True refuge long last issueless scattered down four walls over backwards no sound. All sides endlessness earth sky as one no stir not a breath. Blank planes sheer white calm eye light of reason all gone from mind. Scattered ruins ash grey all sides true refuge long last issueless.

  Ash grey little body only upright heart beating face to endlessness. Old love new love as in the blessed days un-happiness will reign again. Earth sand same grey as the air sky ruins body fine ash grey sand. Light refuge sheer white blank planes all gone from mind. Flatness endless little body only upright same grey all sides earth sky body ruins. Face to white calm touch close eye calm long last all gone from mind. One step more one alone all alone in the sand no hold he will make it.

  Blacked out fallen open true refuge issueless towards which so many false time out of mind. Never but silence such that in imagination this wild laughter these cries. Head through calm eye all light white calm all gone from mind. Figment dawn dispeller of figments and the other called dusk.

  He will go on his back face to the sky open again over him the ruins the sand the endlessness. Grey air timeless earth sky as one same grey as the ruins flatness endless. It will be day and night again over him the endlessness the air heart will beat again. True refuge long last scattered ruins same grey as the sand.

  Face to calm eye touch close all calm all white all gone from mind. Never but imagined the blue in a wild imagining the blue celeste of poesy. Little void mighty light four square all white blank planes all gone from mind. Never was but grey air timeless no stir not a breath. Heart beating little body only upright grey face features overrun two pale blue. Light white touch close head through calm eye light of reason all gone from mind.

  Little body same grey as the earth sky ruins only upright. No sound not a breath same grey all sides earth sky body ruins. Blacked out fallen open four walls over backwards true refuge issueless.

  No sound no stir ash grey sky mirrored earth mirrored sky. Grey air timeless earth sky as one same grey as the ruins flatness endless. In the sand no hold one step more in the endlessness he will make it. It will be day and night again over him the endlessness the air heart will beat again.

  Figment light never was but grey air timeless no sound. All sides endlessness earth sky as one no stir not a breath. On him will rain again as in the blessed days of blue the passing cloud. Grey sky no cloud no sound no stir earth ash grey sand.

  Little void mighty light four square all white blank planes all gone from mind. Flatness endless little body only upright same grey all sides earth sky body ruins. Scattered ruins same grey as the sand ash grey true refuge. Four square true refuge long last four walls over backwards no sound. Never but this changelessness dream the passing hour. Never was but grey air timeless no sound figment the passing light.

  In four split asunder over backwards true refuge issueless scattered ruins. He will live again the space of a step it will be day and night again over him the endlessness. Face to white calm touch close eye calm long last all gone from mind. Grey face two pale blue little body heart beating only upright. He will go on his back face to the sky open again over him the ruins the sand the endlessness. Earth sand same grey as the air sky ruins body fine ash grey sand. Blank planes touch close sheer white all gone from mind.

  Heart beating little body only upright grey face features overrun two p
ale blue. Only upright little body grey smooth no relief a few holes. Never but dream the days and nights made of dreams of other nights better days. He will stir in the sand there will be stir in the sky the air the sand. One step in the ruins in the sand on his back in the endlessness he will make it. Never but silence such that in imagination this wild laughter these cries.

  True refuge long last scattered ruins same grey as the sands. Never was but grey air timeless no stir not a breath. Blank planes sheer white calm eye light of reason all gone from mind. Never but in vanished dream the passing hour long short. Four square all light sheer white blank planes all gone from mind.

  Blacked out fallen open true refuge issueless towards which so many false time out of mind. Head through calm eye all light white calm all gone from mind. Old love new love as in the blessed days unhappiness will reign again. Ash grey all sides earth sky as one all sides endlessness. Scattered ruins ash grey all sides true refuge long last issueless. Never but in dream the happy dream only one time to serve. Little body grey face features slit and little holes two pale blue.

  Ruins true refuge long last towards which so many false time out of mind. Never but imagined the blue in a wild imagining the blue celeste of poesy. Light white touch close head through calm eye light of reason all gone from mind.

  Slow black with ruin true refuge four walls over backwards no sound. Earth sky as one all sides endlessness little body only upright. One step more one alone all alone in the sand no hold he will make it. Ash grey little body only upright heart beating face to endlessness. Light refuge sheer white blank planes all gone from mind. All sides endlessness earth sky as one no sound no stir.

  Legs a single block arms fast to sides little body face to endlessness. True refuge long last issueless scattered down four walls over backwards no sound. Blank planes sheer white eye calm long last all gone from mind. He will curse God again as in the blessed days face to the open sky the passing deluge. Face to calm eye touch close all calm all white all gone from mind.

  Little body little block heart beating ash grey only upright. Little body ash grey locked rigid heart beating face to endlessness. Little body little block genitals overrun arse a single block grey crack overrun. Figment dawn dispeller of figments and the other called dusk.

  Dramatic Works

  Cascando

  It is impossible to emphasize too strongly the importance of music in all Beckett’s work. More than any other contemporary writer, he has used the techniques of music and musical composition in structuring his works. In some instances he used music as a character, so to speak, and combined music and words into a dramatic whole. In 1961 Beckett wrote, in English, a radio play entitled Words and Music in which the Master of Ceremonies, Croak, tries to control the other two “characters.”

  The following year he wrote another radio play, this one in French, entitled Cascando, also a three-“character” work. Here the Master of Ceremonies, Opener, tries to control even as he limits his role to that which is meant to be his. But things get out of hand, and before long not only is Voice telling its story, of one Woburn—wanting to tell it only to finish, that sleep may follow—but Opener too slips into the storyteller’s role.

  Words and music have always been part and parcel of drama, used usually in time-worn ways. Beckett has seen fit not merely to use them, but to propel them onto the stage itself and make them the very characters of his drama.

  Cascando

  A radio play Music by Marcel Mihalovici

  OPENER (dry as dust) : It is the month of May … for me.

  Pause.

  Yes, that’s right.

  Pause.

  I open.

  VOICE (low, panting):—story … if you could finish it … you could rest … you could sleep … not before … oh I know … the ones I’ve finished … thousands and one … all I ever did … in my life … with my life … saying to myself … finish this one … it’s the right one … then rest … then sleep … no more stories … no more words … and finished it … and not the right one … couldn’t rest … straight away another … to begin … to finish … saying to myself … finish this one … then rest … this time it’s the right one … this time you have it … and finished it … and not the right one … couldn’t rest … straight away another … but this one … it’s different … I’ll finish it … then rest … it’s the right one … this time I have it … I’ve got it … Woburn … I resume … a long life … already … say what you like … a few misfortunes … that’s enough … five years later … ten years … I don’t know … Woburn … he’s changed … not enough … recognizable … in the shed … yet another … waiting for night … night to fall … to go out … go on … elsewhere … sleep elsewhere … it’s slow … he lifts his head … now and then … his eyes … to the window … it’s darkening … the earth is darkening … it’s night … he gets up … knees first … then up … on his feet … slips out … Woburn … same old coat … right the sea … left the hills … he has the choice … he has only—

  OPENER (with VOICE): And I close.

  Silence.

  I open the other.

  MUSIC: ……………………………………………

  OPENER (with MUSIC) : And I close.

  Silence.

  I open both.

  VOICE MUSIC } (together) —on … it’s getting on … finish it …………………………………………… don’t give up … then rest … sleep … not before …………………………………………… finish it … it’s the right one … this time you have …………………………………………… it … you’ve got it … it’s there … somewhere …………………………………………… you’ve got him … follow him … don’t lose him …………………………………………… Woburn story … getting on … finish it …………………………………………… then sleep …………………………………………… no more stories …………………………………………… no more words …………………………………………… come on … next thing … he— ……………………………………………

  OPENER (with VOICE and MUSIC): And I close.

  Silence.

  I start again.

  VOICE: —down … gentle slope … boreen … giant aspens … wind in the boughs … faint sea … Woburn … same old coat … he goes on … stops … not a soul … not yet… night too bright … say what you like … the bank … he hugs the bank … same old stick … he goes down … falls … on purpose or not … can’t see … he’s down … that’s what counts … face in the mud … arms spread … that’s the idea … already … we’re there already … no not yet … he gets up … knees first… hands flat… in the mud … head sunk … then up … on his feet … huge bulk … come on … he goes on … he goes down … come on … in his head … what’s in his head … a hole … a shelter … a hollow … in the dunes … a cave … vague memory … in his head … of a cave … he goes down … no more trees … no more bank … he’s changed … not enough … night too bright … soon the dunes … no more cover … he stops … not a soul … not—

  Silence.

  MUSIC: ……………………………………………

 

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