by Lucy Gordon
For Liza’s sake, she insisted.
But she realised she wasn’t being quite honest with herself. His need was as great as the child’s, and the moment when he’d reached out to her in pain was the moment her defences had begun to crack.
At last Matteo came up the steps of the shallow end, pulled on a towelling robe and stretched out. He even took out the book Holly had bought him and turned it over and over. He read the blurb on the back page, then opened the book and began to read, casually at first, and then with obvious interest. He was deep in chapter one when Liza awoke and crept over to him.
‘Is it good?’ she asked.
‘Hm?’ he answered, not lifting his head.
‘Poppa!’
At last he looked at her, tearing himself from the book with difficulty, it seemed to Holly.
‘Is it good?’ Liza demanded.
‘Yes-yes, it’s good.’
‘What’s it about?’
‘It’s about a man in prison for something he didn’t do, and planning his revenge.’
‘Do you ever send innocent people to prison, Poppa?’
He looked aghast at the question. ‘I try not to. I don’t imprison anyone unless I think they’re guilty.’
‘But suppose you get it wrong?’ Liza asked remorselessly.
To Holly’s delight Matteo was bereft of words. He looked across at her wildly, but she was beyond being able to help. She simply lay back in the grass and chuckled.
‘I’m sorry,’ Holly said at last, moving over to them. ‘Liza, you’ll have to let this go for now. But when you’re older you must become a lawyer, and then you can study your Poppa’s cases and tell him where he got it wrong.’
‘All right,’ Liza said, satisfied.
‘Thank you,’ Matteo said wryly.
Having settled the future, Liza returned to the book.
‘Does he do lots of horrible things to his enemies?’ she demanded of her father.
‘I think so. I haven’t got very far in yet. I’ll let you know.’
Liza gave a happy sigh.
‘How can she be such a ghoul?’ Matteo murmured to Holly as Berta took Liza down the steps into the pool.
‘Because she’s a child. Children love that kind of thing.’
‘After what happened to her-’
‘It’s not the same. This is a book, nothing to do with reality.’
She stopped, seeing a sudden change in his expression.
‘What is it?’ she asked. ‘You haven’t really sent an innocent man to gaol, have you?’
‘Not that I know of. Of course, they all protest their innocence. Sometimes the worse they are the more vehemently they protest. The worst one I ever knew was Antonio Fortese, a murderer who escaped too often.’
‘Is he the one you told me about, who threatened you so that you needed a bodyguard?’
‘That’s right. He swore he was innocent, but he was as guilty as hell. As you know, I gave him thirty years. He deserved every moment of it. Now he can threaten all he likes. He’s locked up in a high-security gaol.’
‘Maybe it wasn’t very clever of me to choose that particular book.’ Holly sighed.
‘Why?’ he asked, amused. ‘Do you think it’s going to give me nightmares? Forget it. Characters like Fortese are just part of the way I live. This-’ he waved the novel ‘-is light relief.’
‘Well, I’ll tell you this: Liza’s got a much higher opinion of you now that she knows you can get lost in a good book.’
‘I won’t deny that it has a certain readability.’
‘That’s why you didn’t answer her at first, isn’t it?’
Suddenly he grinned. ‘Yes, I must admit I couldn’t put it down.’
In this mood he was delightful, and she had to remind herself to stay cautious. There was a long way to go before there could be any true communication between them.
Anna appeared from between the trees, looking concerned.
‘Signore, there is someone-’
‘No visitors, I told you,’ Matteo said.
‘But Signore-’
Matteo looked up, irritated. Then his expression changed as he saw the elderly lady who stepped out from behind Anna.
‘Mamma!’
Liza gave a little shriek and joined her father in hurrying to embrace his mother. She seemed to be in her sixties, a smiling woman of great elegance who clearly inspired affection in Matteo and Liza.
Holly watched her curiously, certain that this was no coincidence. She was even more certain a few moments later when she was called forward to be introduced, and saw the old woman look her up and down, clearly comparing her to some mental picture she already had.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t warn you I was coming,’ she said, ‘but it was an impulse.’
‘You know you’re always welcome,’ Matteo said warmly. ‘Let’s go inside.’
Holly knew, from Anna, that Matteo’s father was dead and his mother, Galina, had since remarried. Her husband was an invalid, and the two of them lived down south, in Sicily, where the weather suited him better. It was quite a journey to make on the spur of the moment.
‘My stepdaughters came to see us,’ she explained as they walked back to the house. ‘They prefer having their father to themselves, so I left with a clear conscience. It’s too long since I saw my favourite granddaughter.’
‘I’m your only granddaughter,’ Liza pointed out.
‘Then you must be my favourite,’ Galina returned with triumphant logic.
The rest of the day was taken up with settling her into her room and arranging the evening meal to her liking. Holly withdrew, not wanting to intrude on the family, and didn’t see them again until she went downstairs for supper.
Berta was there too, and Galina greeted her as an old acquaintance. Holly said little but her mind was working furiously. Instinct told her that she was under inspection.
At any other time she would have been amused at Matteo’s demeanour towards his mother, which was respectful. He might be a man of authority to the rest of the world, but he was nervous of his mamma. Now and then his eyes darted to Holly, as though checking whether she was making a good impression.
At last the meal was over. With relief, Holly suggested that it was time for Liza’s day to end.
‘Berta and I will bring her up later,’ Galina said. ‘Why don’t you go off duty?’
It was a dismissal and she had no choice but to accept it.
Perhaps the decision had gone against her, she thought. Hence the choice of Berta. This might even be her last night in the house. It wasn’t so very long ago that she had longed for the means to escape. Now she would have given anything to stay.
Just why she longed to stay was something she wasn’t quite sure about yet, but it was no matter. The decision was being taken out of her hands.
At last Galina arrived with Liza, already half-asleep. Together they put the child to bed and saw her nod off at once.
‘We did not mean to be so late,’ Galina said softly, ‘but Liza had a criminal matter she wished to discuss with her father.’
‘A criminal matter?’
‘Something to do with a book they were enjoying together.’ Her eyes twinkled. ‘Your doing, I fancy.’
‘Oh, I see. Yes, it’s a thriller.’
‘Then it’s definitely your doing. When I see my son deep in a thriller I know he’s come under a new influence. Of course, I already knew that.’
‘I don’t understand. How could you know?’
‘Because he talks of you so much. We telephone each other many times, and always he talks about you. Of course, he is very discreet, very proper. He tells me how good you are being to Liza, and how the child benefits from your care. And so I find myself curious about this wonderful person, and I decide I must meet her for myself. And now that we have met, I think I am starting to understand. I see how Liza loves you, how much good you’re doing her.’
‘But I wonder exactly what Matteo has told you.�
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‘He has told me all I need to know. If there is more-he will tell me that too in his own good time. Let us leave it for now. I am pleased with what I find here. My son begins to look alive again and that is all I want after the way he has suffered.’ She added calmly, ‘Perhaps he is falling in love with you.’
‘Oh, no,’ Holly said quickly. ‘It’s much too soon for that.’
‘Too soon? Why?’
‘After the way he felt about her-’
‘You think he still has a rose-tinted view of his wife? I don’t think so.’
‘Even so, it was all so terrible-he has to get over the shock,’ Holly persisted.
‘You’re a wise woman. You will help him recover. And then-well…’
But Holly shook her head as caution swept her again.
‘There’s no question of it.’
‘So positive? He’s an attractive man with a good position in life, and you seem fond of his child. It wouldn’t be impossible that you might grow to love him.’
‘Yes, it would,’ Holly said firmly. ‘There are too many things in the way.’
‘You love someone else?’
‘I did once. Never again.’
‘I see. Well, I’m a nosy old woman, but I won’t pry any further.’
She was shrewd enough to leave it there, and over the next few days the house became a more cheerful place as her influence was felt. Emboldened, Berta gave in her notice, and departed, with a generous bonus, into Alfio’s arms.
There was a small dinner party in Galina’s honour, at which she kept Holly close to her, smiling contentedly in a way that made her wishes plain.
Holly tried not to spend too much time watching Matteo, unwilling to give substance to Galina’s suspicions. But her eyes strayed towards him too often for comfort, delighting not only in his looks but in his air of poise and authority, his calm detachment. He would speak to a guest, smiling enough to be polite, but the next moment he would retreat into the gentle melancholy that only she completely understood. Holly found a strange, disturbing pleasure in the thought that she knew the depths of him that were hidden from everyone else.
Yet she had no thought of marriage. Their closeness, half-sweet, half-bitter, was enough for the moment. She did not know if she should call it love. She no longer trusted herself on that subject. There was still an antagonism between them, as much on his side, she suspected, as on hers. It was nothing like the unsuspicious, uncritical joy she’d known with Bruno, but then, that hadn’t been love, and she never wanted to feel it again.
Could you be in love with a man whose kisses had thrilled you to the depths one minute, and whose harshness made you want to rage at him the next?
She came out of her reverie to realise that she’d heard a faint, unfamiliar noise. One of the other men put a hand in his pocket and took out his cell phone. She saw the change come over his expression as he stared at it, evidently reading a text.
‘Put the television on,’ he said quickly. ‘Get the news.’
In a moment they were indoors, crowded around the set, where an announcer was saying, ‘Nobody knows how Fortese acquired a gun, but he used it to great effect, shooting dead two prison guards before making his escape…’
‘Fortese,’ Holly whispered. ‘Isn’t he-?’
‘Yes,’ Galina said, beside her. ‘I have always been afraid that this would happen.’ Then she forced a smile. ‘But they will recapture him before he can-that is-’
‘Before he can come after Matteo,’ Holly said. ‘Of course they’ll recapture him. They must.’
‘They must,’ Galina agreed.
In silent dread they looked at each other.
CHAPTER TEN
EVERYTHING changed.
One moment they were enjoying a happy dinner party. The next the guests were saying goodbye, wishing Matteo good luck, but eager to get away.
Within half an hour a posse of police on motorcycles had arrived, ready to take up their positions in the judge’s defence. Matteo greeted them quietly. He had shown almost no reaction to the news, merely nodding calmly as though this were a normal part of life.
And for him it was, Holly realised.
She could barely take in the way life had changed out of all recognition. It might all have been a dream, except that the swarm of armed police made it horribly real. A man who already had several murders against him had set himself to kill Matteo, and was now on the loose, with a gun.
He could be anywhere. The only certain thing was that he wanted revenge and wouldn’t rest until he got it.
She went straight up to Liza’s room, relieved to find her asleep. She longed to talk to Matteo, just to look at him and see him standing there alive. But protecting the child from the knowledge of what was happening had to come first.
She did not even see Matteo again that night, but the next morning he spoke to her quietly before leaving.
‘Two of the police will be staying here, just in case Fortese gets ideas. All of you remain in the house and you’ll be quite safe.’
He departed with barely a nod, and her last sight of him was driving away, accompanied by four police outriders.
Between them she and Galina kept Liza occupied that day, so that she should notice as little as possible out of the ordinary. It took a lot of ingenuity, especially when Matteo returned in the evening, with a change of guard. But they managed.
Galina went to his study and stayed for an hour. When she came out she said to Holly in a strangely urgent voice, ‘He wants to see you.’
She found him looking pale and strained. When he spoke his voice seemed to come from a distance, which contrasted strangely with his words.
‘I have to ask you a favour,’ he said sharply. ‘Not for myself, but for Liza.’
‘Of course.’
He looked uneasy, and seemed unable to look at her as he added, ‘It’s something only you can do for her.’
‘You know I’ll do anything she needs. Name it.’
‘Marry me.’ It came out almost as a bark.
She frowned. She’d heard the words, but didn’t divine their meaning.
‘What did you say?’
‘I want you to become my wife. For Liza’s sake.’
Light dawned. ‘Yes, I see. But there’s no need-I’m not going anywhere. I’ve promised you I’ll be here for her.’
At last he rose and faced her.
‘That’s not enough,’ he said urgently. ‘You need to be her mother-legally-so that nobody else can interfere.’
‘Matteo, what are you talking about? Why should anyone interfere?’
‘I mean-if I weren’t here…’
Like a thunderclap his meaning burst on her.
‘You mean Fortese-you actually think-?’
‘If he manages to kill me Liza will need you as never before. Holly, we have to be married, so that she can’t lose you as well. You’re her only hope if anything happens to me.’
‘Then don’t take the risk,’ she cried. ‘Go into hiding until they catch him.’
She thought she’d never seen so much passionate outrage in one human face.
‘Back off?’ he said in a voice whose softness didn’t disguise its vehemence. ‘Let the villains win? Can’t you understand that the only hope of defeating them is for people like me to face them, no matter what?’
‘But you have a child-’
‘We all have families, we’re all afraid, but if we run away then they’ve won. They take over, and what happens then to all the promises we made about protecting the world from them? What happens to our children in the world that we’ll bequeath them then? Holly, for the love of heaven, tell me that you understand!’
She nodded bleakly. ‘I do understand.’
‘If he comes after me, I’m ready for it. But what I won’t do-can’t do-is run away.’ He added with an icy bleakness that matched her own, ‘No matter what the cost.’
Holly tried to get away, but his hand on her arm was merciless.
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br /> ‘It’s not like you to duck out,’ he said. ‘You’re stronger than that.’
‘I thought I was, but you’re asking me to jump off a great height into the unknown. I don’t know you. Much of the time I don’t even like you.’
‘You haven’t made a secret of that. But this isn’t about how we feel. It’s about Liza.’
‘So you said. You’ll get me to do for her what you should do, the way you always have. It’s all for Liza, because you know that’s the one argument that will move me. Just like a lawyer.’
‘I can’t help that. I am a lawyer-’
‘And like any good lawyer you know how to go for the jugular.’
‘All right, do it for me,’ he shouted. ‘Do it so that I can sleep at night knowing I’ve protected her future. Do it so that I don’t have nightmares thinking of her alone. That little girl has lost so much…first her mother, then her father-yes, she’s lost her father. I don’t mean the other one, I mean me. I try to do my duty by her, I know she’s innocent, but it isn’t here.’ He thumped his chest with his fist. ‘With your help I’m putting up a good pretence, but I can’t recreate the feeling-the joy I felt at just being with her, gazing at her, knowing that she was mine. I can’t give her the look she once saw in my eyes. I see her searching for it, puzzled that it’s missing, but there’s nothing I can do. Hate me for it. You can’t hate me as much as I hate myself. Think as badly of me as you like, but do this for her, and for me.’
‘Matteo, please-let me think, I need time-’
‘There isn’t any. I know it’s not fair to dump this on you. What a choice to face you with!’ His voice took on a note of grim humour. ‘You could be a rich widow in a very short time. Or, if you get really unlucky, you might be stuck with me for years.’
‘Stop it,’ she said fiercely.
‘I’m just trying to see it from your point of view.’
‘Do you think I want to make light of it?’ she demanded, beginning to be angry again. ‘Is that what you think of me?’
‘I’m trying to confront this the best way I can,’ he said, his voice rising again in its turn, ‘and you needn’t tell me I’m making a mess of it, because I know that. What is the right way? Shall I go down on one knee?’