Wait, though, said Calloway. Wait. Look at it again, Miss Bear. VM P.R.A.Y? Could all those periods in there have some significance for Schulz? Or something from your church, maybe? Is P.R.AY. an acronym for some church organization? Schulz use V for victim on the first line, so could VM refer to that? Well check through his files, see what we can come up with. Maybe you have something else hes written, some notes to you, something with abbreviations?
I said no and did not mention that Tom Schulz had written me few notes in the time wed known each other. Our courtship had emerged from crisis. When the attempted poisoning of my ex-father-in-law had led to the temporary closing of my catering business, I had responded reluctantly to Toms interest in me. As our relationship developed over the last eighteen months, wed had phone conversations, barbecues, outings in the mountains or in Denver. These outings invariably concluded with meals I fixed in my professional cooking area or dinners Tom prepared in the fabulously equipped kitchen of his cabin. And only very recently, when we were alone, those meals were followed by lovemaking.
We had not written.
Calloway persisted. But you must have something of his, a notebook, journal, calendar, anything that might contain some of these abbreviations. If you did, or if such written material existed, would it be at your house? Or his?
I knew she was doing her job. Trying to find their premier homicide investigator, the police would ruthlessly unearth every scrap of information. But I wasnt up to discussing our complex domestic arrangements, especially when it involved so much stuff in boxes that had just been moved to my house from Toms cabin. In fact, I wasnt up to discussing much of anything. I said, Im not sure. But Ill look, I promise.
Who has keys to his place? she wanted to know. And his car? I mean, besides that set in the creek.
My eyes were burning, my hands were numb with cold. I muttered that I had a set of keys to his home but not with me. Anyway, I added, his place was empty. At that moment, another officer summoned Calloway. She promised that Boyd or Armstrong would stay in touch, and directed that I keep the phone line to my house open. I asked Boyd when I could have the articles Tom Schulz dropped at the crime scene. He clomped off, then reported back that when the lab was done with them, someone would come by my place with Toms things.
Was there any blood? I asked Boyd. I cleared my throat. Toms blood? You said he was hurt.
Boyd winced sympathetically. One of his rough hands reached out impulsively for mine. Quietly, he answered, his ankle or broke a leg bone coming down the bank. Im not going to lie to you: He could be hurt bad. I couldnt listen, couldnt look at Boyd, couldnt bear to have him touching me. I turned my gaze to the snowy ground and pulled my hands away. Boyd went on. Thats the only way the perp could have overpowered him, we think. If thats what happened. You know, Schulz is muscular, hes a touch guy. Street smart and regular smart. Were going to bring you a copy of the note, he added, changing the subject, for you to study.
A cold, wet breeze swept the frigid meadow. The end of the snow and advent of watery afternoon sunshine had not materialized into anything warm and springlike. I clasped my upper arms but couldnt stop trembling. Helen Keene shambled over to me and again threw the victim-advocate quilt around my shoulders. Slowly we walked down the muddy driveway to Boyds squad car. She asked me for directions and then drove us home. We passed the ranches, the custom homes, the preparatory school entrance. The time spent in Olsons meadow had been hard on my wedding suit; cold, wet silk clung to my legs. In my minds eye, I kept seeing Boyd, Armstrong, and Helen Keen walking across the flagstones to the St. Lukes office with their terrible news. I couldnt control a guttural groan. I needed to get home, to be with Arch and Julian.
Please keep your phone line open, Helen said after Id turned down her offer to come into my house and stay for a while. She handed me her card. And keep the quilt, she added softly. A group of women from your church donates them to the Sheriffs Department and to Aspen Meadow Outreach just for situations like yours. The questions bubbled up in my brain: Situations like mine? What exactly was my situation? But Helen held me in her steady gaze. Goldy please call me if you need me.
I thanked her and extricated myself from the police car. On the sidewalk across from my house, a trio of neighbors watched, apparently oblivious to the cold. How bad news traveled so quickly in this town I did not know. Stumbling dizzily toward my front door, it was all I could do to keep the quilt awkwardly clutched around my muddied wedding suit.
Once I had come through our security system, I called for Arch, then Julian. The silent house felt deserted without the customary rich smell of cooking. My suitcase, packed for our honeymoon, sat forlornly in the front hall. I turned away from it.
Oh, Mom, youre here! cried Arch as he galloped down the stairs. He had changed from the tux to a gray sweatsuit. Julian took Grandma and Grandpa to the airport. Hes taking our tuxes back, too. I was just about to start putting the food in the walk-in, the way Julian told me. Wheres Tom? How come your clothes are so messy? Whered you get that blanket thing?
Oh, hon. Its a long story. I begged off immediate explanations by announcing I would take a shower while he put the platters away. Wearily, I climbed the stairs. Every muscle in my body ached. In the bedroom that Tom had begun only recently to share with me, I stood in front of the mirror and gazed at the ruined beige silk outfit. A middle-aged Miss Haversham, my reflection mocked back. A flood of anger sent my fingers ripping at the tiny pearl buttons. Two flew off and pinged on the wooden floor. A half-formed sob squawked out of my throat. I carefully removed the churchwomens necklace. I dont deserve this, I reflected bitterly. Selfish to worry about what I didnt deserve, but I didnt care. Tears leaked out of my eyes as I groped around on my knees until I found the buttons. I have suffered enough already. Hey, God? Did you hear me? If youre really there. After placing the buttons on my bureau, I reached for Toms pillow on the bed, then buried my face in it. I sobbed and gasped, then inhaled deeply. Even though hed spent the last few nights at his cabin, the pillowcase had the wonderful smell of him.
In the shower the spray went to scalding as I rocked back and forth, back and forth. Eventually I wrapped myself in a thick terrycloth towel and sat on the bed, dizzy and exhausted. I rose and pulled on a sweatsuit. Again I caught a glimpse of my wan reflection. What to say to Arch? To Julian? I didnt even know what I was going to say to myself.
In the kitchen the counters were empty except for a tray of marzipan-covered petit fours and chocolate truffles that had been meant to be take-home presents for our wedding guests. I asked Arch if anybody had called. He said no and went back to methodically pulling off the wrapping and then eating truffles one small bite at a time. I hugged myself and began to rock again. Arch stopped in midbite his eyes narrowed behind his glasses.
Whats going on, Mom?
Oh, Arch … Im afraid I have some bad news.
Father Olson, I heard.
No. This is about Tom. Arch was one of the people who had to know. I braced myself, then flatly recounted the bare outlines of the story: Tom finding the mortally injured priest and then apparently being hurt and forcefully taken.
As I spoke, My sons freckled face went numb with shock. When Id finished, he sat motionless for a longtime, then carefully, he put the half-eaten truffle back on the paper napkin embossed with Tom and Goldy, April 11. He pushed his glasses up his nose and clasped his hands under his armpits.
Tom Schulz was kidnapped?
They think so.
Theyre going to find him, arent they?
There was no point in equivocating. I hope so, or The police are working on it would only lead to a tangle of unanswerable questions and a flood of worries. There was no reason to voice the unwanted fears that chilled my spirit the way winter winds howl down the mountains. I saw myself picking out a
plain coffin for Tom Schulz. In a few short years, Arch would go off to college. I would live out my days alone.
Yes, I told my son firmly, with more conviction than I felt. They will find him.
Arch started to sweep the kitchen floor, an order-restoring chore he often undertook when his outer life was in chaos. My stomach said I should eat, but one glance inside the walk-in refrigerator at the platters of beautifully decorated reception food made me turn away. Would whoever abducted Tom feed him? I paced around the kitchen, felt the gnawing in my stomach develop into spasms, willed the pains away. Arch finished the floor, took out his drawing materials, and sat at the kitchen table. He knew I would want him within sight.
My business line rang. The sudden noise made me cry out as if Id been struck. I dived for it.
What? I shouted. If it was a client, I thought belatedly, I could kiss this booking good-bye.
Goldy? came the tentative, frightened voice of Zelda Preston. Are you all right? I mean, I know you arent all right … you cant be after whats happened …
Zelda Preston, motherin-law to scarecrow Agatha in the church kitchen, was a current Altar Guild member and, until very recently, the organist at St. Lukes. Zelda and Lucille Boatwright had both been widowed about a decade ago. The two women were almost constantly in each others company now, except when Zelda met with the master swimmers and did her weekly three miles worth of laps. With her attenuated face that always reminded me of a camels, her wiry muscles, and her long braid of gray hair wound on top of her head, Zelda Preston seemed the tall, rod-thin counterpart to Lucilles stodgy, solid self.
I said, Are you calling about Lucille?
Oh, my dear Goldy. No. Im calling about you. I want to do something for you, poor dear … Her voice faltered.
Zelda carried a painful past, but wed never had any sisterly soul-baring talks. An older female Episcopalian would rather die impoverished than discuss psychic wounds, a conversation she would put in the same category as comparing bra sizes. Nevertheless, Zeldas attempt to offer sympathy touched me, and awakened guilt. I hadnt called her this past month, when the many disagreements she and Father Olson had had about ecclesiastical music had ended up with his firing her. Still, what would I have said? You want to have lunch and talk about how getting fired is like getting divorced? I didnt think so.
Zelda. You are thoughtful to call. I dont need anything, thanks. I cleared my throat, keenly aware that I needed to keep both phone lines clear in case the police needed to reach me. I didnt know which number they had. Since I had no call-waiting, I couldnt risk giving the police a busy signal. But explaining all this, plus Toms disappearance, were more than I cold handle at the moment. I need to go.
Oh, all right. But Goldy, she went on meekly, I am so terribly sorry to bother you about this, but Im just trying to see what you want done with your wedding flowers. Lucille isnt available, as you probably know, so I need to step in for her to help plan the Holy Week services and the funeral for Father Olson. She paused. Have you heard anything? I mean, about what happened to him?
Not yet.
Well … If you wish, we could try to use these flowers for Father Olson … I know it sounds petty, but someone must start to make the decisions, and Doug Ramsey is impossible… If you donated the flowers, it would certainly save the parish money, goodness knows. However, I do not know what our new priest will want. Not our new priest, she corrected herself, whoever those people down at the diocese send to us. Zeldas voice dropped on the word diocese in a way that left no doubt as to her opinion of that ecclesiastical body.
Tell you what, I said placatingly, desperate to clear the phone line. Why dont you donate them to the Catholic church? Their parish is bigger; theyre sure to have a wedding coming up soon.
The Catholics! Having a wedding during Holy Week? For heavens sake, the least you could do is donate them to someone from our parish who is ill. Honestly, Goldy. The Catholics.
Fine, Zelda. Really. Whos in the hospital at the moment/ Whatever will make you happy. This whole conversation was absurd. But however much we might disagree or be upset, Episcopalians did not hang up on each other.
She trilled, Roger Bampton is home from the hospital although … She broke off and announced, Victor Mancuso has shingles, but I dont know which hospital hes in, and of course it would be difficult to track down the church secretary, since she took her Easter vacation early. She paused again. And its you I want to have happy, my dear.
Victor Mancuso? I said, incredulous. VM. I demanded, Whos Victor Mancuso?
No one really, hes the secretarys uncle. She just put him on the prayer list before she left. Nobody else knows anything about him, I already asked.
On the prayer list, on the prayer list. P.R.A.Y. I struggled to think: The prayer list contained names of all those for whom the parish offered intercessory requests. Or, as Arch maintained, it was the list of people and things we wanted God to fix. The charismatic segment of the congregation, those parishioners who put ultra-enthusiastic emphasis on spiritual gifts and a personal relationship with Jesus, offered intercessions on a much more regular and serious basis than most of the rest of us. There was also a small noncharismatic womens prayer group that met weekly. Zelda, I remembered, was a member of this group. Maybe she could help decipher the acronyms in Toms note.
I asked sharply, is there an ecumenical or parish organization with the initials P.R.A.Y.? Maybe something like, Protestant-Roman Catholic Association of Youth?
Zelda drew in her breath, confused. Goldy? What in the world are you talking about? Are they the ones you want to donate the flowers to? Because I cant be calling all around
Zelda, is there such an organization? P.R.A.Y.? Im sure Ive heard of it somewhere.
Well, Im sure I havent, and Ive been in this parish for twenty years, ever since Father Pinckney
Okay, thanks, Zelda. Please. Use the flowers in any way you wish. Im sorry, I have to go. We both stuttered good-byes and gently hung up.
Arch glanced at me, frowned, and left the room to look for some colored pencils. I stared at my catering calendar. The days were blank. Of course, I had cleared it in anticipation of our three-day honeymoon. Now there was not even work I could do to take my mind off this spiral of events.
Worry for Tom exploded in my chest. Should I have asked Helen Keene to stay with me? When would Julian be back from the airport? What could Toms cryptic notes mean? I lay down on my kitchen floor, pulled my knees to my chest, and felt tears slide down my cheeks unchecked. Im losing it.
The doorbell rang; again, my heart jumped. Leaping to my feet, I raced down the hall, then stared disbelievingly through the peekhole. Marla. She made a face at me and held up plastic bags of food. Just what we needed: more to eat. Arch, who had trotted down the hall behind me at the sound of the bell, moaned in disappointment and muttered that he was going to watch television.
What are you doing here alone? Marla demanded as soon as she had heaved herself and her bags into the kitchen. I swear. Still wearing her dark matron of honor suit, she took in my sweatsuit and my face, then shook her head. Somehow I knew you wouldnt want me to take you out to dinner tonight.
Im not alone; Arch is here. To my horror, it all spilled out. Marla Father Olsons killer took Tom. I had to go out to Olsons place, and it was awful …
She pulled me in for a long hug. I know, she murmured in my ear. I was down at the church looking for you. Father Doug told me. Do you need to cry?
I thought about the weeping Id already done, solitary and helpless on the floor. Thanks, but no. Not at the moment, anyway.
Need to talk?
I pulled away from her, picked up a bag, and set it on the counter. How did Doug Ramsey know Tom was missing?
From the cops.
Marla heaved the other bag onto one of the kitchen counters. Some of them are still at the church. They wanted to see if Schulzs phone call to the church office might have been taped.
Oh, Lord. I stumbled morosely into a kitchen chair.
Marla eased down beside me. She put a hand over mine. I stared unhappily at the black front of Toms range, unable to rid myself of the vision of him flipping pieces of chicken on the grill. Hed had friends from the Sheriffs Department haul the Jenn-Air grill-with-convection-oven over from his cabin and install the ventilation pipe a week ago. He had said he couldnt live without his oven. With a wink, hed added, Sort of like you, Goldy.
After a few moments, Marla rose and began to unload her stash. Individually wrapped Beef Wellington. Frozen Scampi. Wed often joked that our ex-husband had found two women who loved food more than they loved him. My passion was working in the kitchen, and Marla was the queen of packaged gourmet.
She looked at me. Wheres your choker?
Upstairs. Why? Its a miracle I didnt lose it out at Olsons place, tramping around in the mud.
Goldy, dont say its a miracle to me. She flopped back down next to me. Weve got a problem. Actually, more than one.
What? With the pearls?
Before your wedding was supposed to begin, I was out in the narthex with the jewelry raffle committee. I told them both of us were wearing the chokers that were going to be sold, and they oohd and aahed.
Oh boy, I thought here we go. Some left-wing group had threatened a pearl boycott.
Ill get to the pearl problem in a minute. She sighed. Apparently, Marla continued glumly, some of the goings-on in our parish have started rumors floating around in the diocese.
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