by Dakota Trace
Pushing the button, she raised it to her ear. “Hello?”
“Are you ready to talk yet, ma peekôn?” Jackson’s voice seemed hopeful but he didn’t press.
“Honestly?” She threw an arm over her eyes, wishing she could hide from everything and everybody.
“Of course, honestly. I always expect an honest answer from you.”
“I’m talked out. I’ve been poked and prodded enough tonight. I don’t want to do anything more than take a shower and crawl in between my own sheets.”
“Then that’s what you should do, even as much as it disappoints me.”
She groaned. “And why would it disappoint you? Were you expecting phone sex tonight? Sorry White Boy, I can’t even summon up enough energy to duel it out with you tonight. Your damn aunt ran me through the wringer.”
“Fuck my aunt. I’m pissed at her right now.”
“And why’s that?”
“Jude called me to tell me what she was doing – after she did it.”
“Great. So now you know what a mess I honestly am, and don’t even want to have phone sex with me. The perfect way to finish this fucked up day.”
Jackson sighed. “While I wouldn’t turn it down, I’d much rather talk about what’s happening between us. I could care less about what Olivia’s trying to pull, as long as you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Tired but out of sorts, Jackson.”
“Then it’s time for you to haul your sweet little ass into bed. Just realize eventually we’re going to have this talk. Even if I have to do it through a three inch glass plate so we can keep our hands off each other.”
Rena couldn’t help it. She burst out laughing at the thought of Jackson placing a sheet of glass between them to circumvent their chemistry long enough so they could truly talk.
“Go ahead and laugh, MacAllister. Just remember, the physical will only get us so far and even as sweet as I find your submission, we can’t stay in bed all the time.”
Lifting her arm off her face, Rena sat up a bit straighter. “And what does submission have to do with being in the bedroom when a Dom can demand submission any place, any time?”
He chuckled. “Of course they can. You don’t realize how many times you’ve been in my office and I’ve visualized having you on your knees, or better yet across my desk as I warm your ass with the ruler I keep for just that purpose?”
Unbelievably her libido stirred. As tired emotionally and physically as she was, she would’ve thought nothing could arouse her, but instead here she was, her nipples peaking against her bra while her pussy grew damp under her panties.
“Perhaps I should have made it clearer, Rena. When I’m not in a scene, I don’t expect submission. I want a woman who won’t put up with my shit when I get out of line, who’ll actually converse with me, not just say “Yes, Sir - No, Sir” twenty-four, seven. I need submission in a lover but I don’t want the responsibility of living her life, of making every little choice for her.”
Her breath caught, and she made a decision; one she couldn’t believe she was making but as Olivia had suggested, Rena had to start trusting sometime. “Meet me tomorrow at Olivia’s, eight o’clock. Reserve a private room, Sir, but understand we’ll only be using it for conversation. Text me if you can agree to my conditions.” She disconnected the call, not even waiting for his response. She just prayed she’d done the right thing.
Less than thirty seconds later, her phone chirped. Slowly opening it, she read the quick message and wanted to groan. He’d accepted her conditions but added one of his own. He wanted her to wear an outfit he’d be sending over. She had a sneaky suspicion it was going to be much more risqué than the clothing she normally wore.
Chapter Thirteen
Staring down at the long box which had just arrived via messenger, Rena hesitated in opening it. She wanted to know what was inside but at the same time she didn’t. It would make this meeting feel all the more real. When the phone rang in her kitchen, she set it down on the table, before answering it. “Hello?”
“Hey, Sissy.” Keisha sounded a bit worn and tired.
“Keisha.” Pleasure filled Rena. She hadn’t spoken to her sister in nearly a week. “How are you and my niece or nephew doing?”
“Tired. Just wanted to remind you of our upcoming Lamaze class. You’re free on Wednesday night, right?”
Rena opened the fridge. “Of course. Not that I understand why you need me there along with Eddie. Speaking of Eddie…how are things going?”
Keisha giggled. “Better. He’s been home the past week and so supportive.” Keisha’s voice dropped to a whisper. “He even made love to me last night.”
A smile crossed Rena’s face. “That’s great, hun’. I told you he still loved you, which is why he should be your Lamaze coach.”
“He is. But as much as he gets called out, I need you as a backup. He’s trying to get out of this trip to Detroit next week, since it’s so close to my due date. I thought you didn’t have an issue with…” Keisha seemed a bit more subdued.
Rena walked across the kitchen, pacing between the sink and the table. “I didn’t say I had an issue with it, Keisha. I was just making a comment. I’m glad to be there in a pinch. But you tell Eddie if he thinks he can claim business and not attend because of his squeamish stomach, I’m going to kick his butt up between his shoulder blades.”
Her words had the intended response , Keisha laughed. Eddie’s squeamish stomach had been the bane of the man’s existence since the first time he’d seen blood during a shoot-out. Which is why he’s the man behind logistics as opposed to regularly working the front lines. From the living room, she heard the clock toll six times. Crap! She had less than an hour to get ready before she had to call a cab to pick her up. “Hey, Sis. I have a date tonight. I gotta get ready or I’ll be late.”
“That’s wonderful! Is it anyone I know?” Keisha sounded exuberant once again.
Glancing at the box sitting on the table, she moved closer, carefully using a sharp knife to slice through the tape holding it shut. “Yeah, but no, I’m not going to tell you because…” She pried the lid off before moving the tissue aside. Her breath caught at the sight of emerald latex.
“Because why?”
Swallowing, Rena only paid half attention to her sister as she pulled the garment out of the box. “Because you’ll tell Eddie and I’ll never hear the end of it.” Holding it up, a low whimper of longing escaped her. Although the outside of the baby doll dress was a shiny deep emerald, the inside was a deeper forest green and very slippery against her fingers. She could almost imagine what it would feel like against her skin. It was the same dress she’d been admiring since she’d seen it in the window of the Vex clothing store on Montrose Avenue. She’d never imagined owning it, since she hadn’t planned on continuing in the lifestyle.
“Are you okay?” Concern laced Keisha’s tone. “This person isn’t forcing you into the date, is he?”
Rena tore her attention away from the dress. “No, nothing like that. I just stubbed my toe on the kitchen table.” The fib rolled off her tongue as she noticed a note in the bottom of the box. “I have to go, Sis. I’ll call you later and tell you how it went. Why don’t you take it easy and curl up with a huge bowl of Rocky Road?”
After her sister assured her she would do that, Rena hung up the phone. Reading his note, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to growl in frustration or whimper with need. He’d written he’d dreamed of seeing her in the outfit he’d included, and wanted her to wear this tonight along with the pretty wisps of underwear he’d included.
“Damn you, Jackson Levough. How the hell did you figure out I really liked this dress?” Regardless of how he’d figured it out, she would wear it. Even if it has to go back after tonight. She wasn’t sure how their conversation was going to go, especially once she’d explained not only her limits, but the reasoning behind them. No Dom she knew would agree to them, but at least for a little while, she could hope to have it all.
* * * *
Pausing inside the doorway of the private room, Jackson wanted to groan. While he’d fantasized about how Rena would look in the baby doll dress, nothing had prepared him for the reality of it. Standing with her back to him, her braids spilling down her back, she was studying the array of toys hanging from the leather covered peg board hanging from the wall. The luscious emerald latex showcased her generous curves in a way that had him itching to touch her dark skin. His palms tingled with the need, but he forced it aside. She’d asked for conversation only. The fact she’d actually worn the dress for him as he’d asked was all he could hope for tonight.
“You look beautiful, ma peekôn.” He watched as she stiffened a bit then made herself visibly relax before she turned to face him.
“It’s the dress, Jackson. I should ask how you figured out I loved this particular dress.” She moved towards the spanking bench before sitting down on its padded seat. He wasn’t surprised that she hadn’t knelt at his entrance. She was much too independent to kneel for any man who wasn’t her Dom. He mentally told himself to be patient. They needed to come to an agreement before they could move forward.
Stepping into the room, he closed the door behind him. “I saw you stop one day in front of Vex’s display.”
She nodded. “But how did you figure out which one? There were several…”
“I didn’t.” He shrugged, before smiling at her. “I just picked the one that drew me the most and hoped it was the one you were so attentive to.” He stopped inches from her, before reaching out to touch the shiny bodice strap. He’d expected it to feel cool against his fingertips, but instead it was warm from her body heat.
“Well, you chose well.” She shivered when his fingers slipped off the strap and onto the bare flesh next to it.
“Cold?” His voice came out a bit more husky than he’d expected.
“Cut the shit, Jackson. You know damned good and well I’m not cold. It’s warmer than hell in here.” She seemed to be gritting her teeth. “You need to keep your hands to yourself if we’re going to have our talk.”
“That’s my girl. Give me hell.” Removing his hand, he stepped back. “It’s your fault. In that dress…” He shook his head. “…you’re nearly irresistible. Perhaps I should’ve thought of that before I sent it to you.” Stepping over to the micro-fridge sitting in the corner, he retrieved himself a bottle, not trusting himself with anything stronger than water. “Would you like some?” he asked, holding the bottle up for her inspection.
“Sure.”
He grabbed a second bottle before heading over to where she sat. Twisting the cap off, he handed it to her, before leaning against a counter a few feet away. The tension in the room grew as she sipped on her water.
“Rena?” His voice made her jump. “You know, I’m not going to bite you. You wanted to talk, so why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind.”
She gave a sigh, before pushing several braids behind her ear. “I’m…well, let’s say this isn’t what I’m used to.”
He crossed his legs at the ankle and gave her what he hoped was an encouraging nod. “So tell me what you are used to.”
Her cute little pixie nose wrinkled. “A handful of papers with check boxes of what I’ll allow and what I won’t during a scene.”
Taking a swallow of his water, he thought over her words. “So you’re used to negotiating a scene for a single night, not a relationship?”
She shrugged. “The one time I did do a full-fledged relationship, it blew up in my face. Louis expected me to play by the rules, but didn’t follow them himself.”
Jackson frowned. “So it was a ‘do as I say, not as I do’ type of relationship?”
She cocked her head. “Sorta. He was possessive of me, wanted to be the only Dom who I played with, but he still wanted to play with other subs.”
“With you or without you?” Jackson forced himself to tread carefully. In the world of BDSM it wasn’t uncommon for a Dom to play or even have more than one submissive. Subs were expected either to enjoy sharing their Doms, or at least tolerate the idea of it. While it wasn’t his way, he didn’t look down on such relationships like the one his aunt had with Jude and Micah.
She frowned. “He never outright asked me to play with another submissive, probably because he knew I’d have told him no, but one night I came home unexpectedly to find him in his playroom flogging another woman. His dick was hanging out for the world to see, and I could see his seed all over her back.”
Jackson winced. It was one thing to play with another sub, but it was another for your sub to walk in unprepared for the sight. “Ouch! I take it he never talked to you about the idea of having another join you or him playing with another?”
A frown crossed Rena’s face before she set aside her water. “We talked about it. But evidently he didn’t take me seriously when I told him if I accepted his collar I expected monogamy. It was one of my hard limits. I even made sure it was written into the service contract I signed.”
He tucked away the contract tidbit to focus on the idea of monogamy. “So you expect if we’re in a relationship to be the only person I would play with?”
She arched an eyebrow. “No, I wouldn’t expect it, I’d demand it. Only a fool plays around with sex, Jackson. There’re too many diseases, and too many feelings can get hurt when one partner in a committed relationship is promiscuous.”
He sighed. This could be a major issue for them. He loved his job as a trainer at Olivia’s but hadn’t had sex with a sub in that context for nearly a year. But he had a feeling it might just not matter. If Rena couldn’t handle the idea of him touching others to teach them a safe way to experience flogging and spanking, their relationship was doomed before it even began. “You do realize, there’s a difference between being in a scene with a sub and fucking her, don’t you?”
Her eyes lowered as her shoulders slumped. “And you’re splitting hairs, Jackson, which is why I don’t think I can do this anymore. You’d ask too much in return for what physical pleasure I’d receive.” She slowly stood. “I’ll send back the dress and we’ll forget this happened…”
“Rena, wait…” He held his hand out to her. “…I didn’t say I couldn’t be monogamous. Just that…”
She paused by the door, her back stiff. “There’s little difference in my eyes between whipping a woman ‘til she comes then allowing her to suck you off, in comparison to what you’d more than likely expect out of your submissive at home. Even if you didn’t sleep with her, it’s all about your pleasure and…”
Now furious, Jackson pressed a palm against the door. He didn’t recall crossing the room, but now that he was there, he was damned if he was going to let her leave and both of them be denied or punished because Louis Vayarti III hadn’t been able to keep it in his pants like Rena had expected. “I’m not him. When I say a scene, I’m not talking about what I want with you. A scene can be done for many reasons, mutual pleasure included, but some are done simply because someone needs to teach a couple the correct ways to play so nobody gets hurt.”
She drew a deep breath. “Which do you prefer, Jackson? The mutual pleasure or the teaching?”
Turning, he used his body to cover hers, pinning her between him and the door. “Both appeal.” He refused to touch her intimately but allowed the heat of his body to radiate to hers. “When I’m here at the club I scene with couples. It’s all about teaching safe techniques. I take new Masters and show them the correct way to wield a crop, a flogger, even a paddle, how to find their submissive’s boundaries safely. What signs they should look for if their sub happens to be in danger, how far they can push, but also when they should stop. It’s a very rewarding job. I love sharing my knowledge with people. But never once in the last year have I taken a submissive during one of
my training sessions.”
“You haven’t?” Her voice seemed to break, almost stammer. That’s when he swooped in for the kill.
“No, because the sub has always belonged to another, or she isn’t...” He nuzzled aside a braid, taking in the sweet honeysuckle scent she was wearing.
“Isn’t what?” Her voice was reed thin, her forehead pressed against the door.
“Isn’t you, Rena. Since we’ve returned from Ireland, I haven’t wanted any other woman, submissive or otherwise. You’ve lit a fire in me, one that isn’t going to burn out any time soon. So if you’re asking what type of scene I want when I look at you, then you better be prepared to accept the idea of mutual pleasure. I could accept nothing less.” He pushed away, then turned her body to face him. When she looked up at him with hopeful eyes, he knew he’d never do anything to hurt her intentionally as long she accepted him as he was.
“While I’ll continue to teach others, Rena, it’ll have absolutely nothing in common with what I want to experience with you. The question at hand is whether or not you can handle the idea of me placing my hands on another submissive to teach their Dom or Domme? We all have hard limits, ma peekôn, and this is one of mine. I won’t ever have another insecure woman accusing me of cheating on her. If we’re together, then we’re together. I won’t be looking for sexual release with any other person outside our relationship.”
When she opened her mouth to answer, he pressed a finger against her lips. “Don’t answer now. You need to think before you tell me ‘yes or no’. Despite how much I want you, I won’t accept a snap decision. My goal is to have a committed relationship, where past demons or doubts don’t come between us, but I’m more than willing to wait until you can offer one.”