Hays slid her arm around Auden's waist, instantly comforted by the embrace. She grabbed the wine bottle with her free hand. "Get the glasses. I think we can take care of this."
Five minutes later, they were curled up on the sofa facing the fire, which Hays had stoked with several more logs. Auden reclined in the curve of Hays's body, her feet tucked beneath her, her shoes abandoned on the floor. Hays had covered them with a knitted afghan and had one arm around Auden's shoulders, her cheek resting against Auden's temple. "Better?"
"Mmm," Auden sighed. "Wonderful."
Hays kissed her temple, then the angle of her jaw. "You're very beautiful."
"Thank you." Auden nestled against Hays's chest and watched the flames dance, listening to the steady beat of Hays's heart. Such an incredible, miraculous thing—this woman, this life. She thought of Rune's scene of two uncertain lovers seated before a fire and how they had eventually surrendered to desire. She remembered the passion and the tenderness and the sweet, sweet longing as if those feelings had been her own. Suddenly, she wanted to live, not just dream, that moment with Hays. "I want to make love with you tonight."
"I want you, too," Hays breathed against her ear. "So much I can't think of anything else."
"Is there anything we need to be careful about?" Auden tilted her head, searched Hays's face. "Could I hurt you somehow?"
"No." Hays kissed Auden's forehead. "No."
"You're sure? The...bleeding?"
Hays shook her head. "I've just been transfused. I can tell when my counts are dropping. Headaches, bruises, and then the bleeding starts. I'm okay now."
Auden turned so that she was lying in Hays's lap, her breasts against Hays's, her arms around Hays's neck. "Good. Because I have this terrible, terrible need to touch you everywhere, and I can't guarantee your safety."
Hays laughed, her heart lifting at the teasing note in Auden's voice. "How come I'm not scared?"
"I don't know," Auden murmured, working on the buttons of Hays' shirt with one hand. "You should be."
Chapter Twenty-Five
H ays looked down and watched the delicate fingers open her shirt. Her entire body tensed, anticipating their touch. The room was cast in shadows, red tinged with bursts of orange reflected from the fire. Auden's face was part in shadow, part illuminated by firelight. It reminded Hays of the night in the hotel, only then, the reflections on the exquisite planes of Auden's face had been from moonlight on the snow. That night had been mystical; tonight was breathtakingly real. Both were magic.
"Are you still cold?" Hays whispered.
"No." Auden's voice was hoarse and low. She was intent on removing the barriers between them, swamped with the sudden need to feel the heat of Hays' skin.
Hays pushed the afghan aside, then drew a sharp breath as Auden's fingers slid beneath her shirt and over her breast. Her nipples contracted sharply and an answering twinge echoed between her thighs. She yearned for Auden's touch, but even more, she was desperate to touch her.
"Straddle me," Hays murmured as she reached to undo Auden's blouse.
Auden shifted until she was on her knees above Hays's lap, her hands moving automatically to Hays' shoulders for support. When Hays opened the last button, slid the silk from Auden's shoulders and, with one hand, released the clasp on the sheer lace brassiere, Auden's bare breasts were a breath away from Hays's lips.
"You're perfect," Hays said softly as she let the garments fall. Cradling both breasts in her palms, she pressed them together and lowered her head.
"Oh yes." Auden arched her back, her lids closing, as she felt her nipple drawn into the warmth of Hays's mouth. The sensation was at once soothing and stimulating. She felt cherished even as her body ignited with arousal. Threading her fingers into Hays's hair, she drew her lover's face more closely to her flesh. "Harder," she whispered. "Take me harder."
Groaning, Hays softly licked first one nipple, then the other, until they hardened and contracted with the merest brush of her tongue. She sucked them between her lips, tormented them with her tongue, teased them with her teeth until Auden made small mewling sounds and rocked her hips urgently in Hays's lap.
"Can you come like this?" Hays asked, her mouth still on Auden's breasts, her chest heaving. The intensity of Auden's response was breathtaking, and Hays's head was light with excitement.
"I...I don't know. God, it's wonderful." Auden pulled Hays's head back and searched her face, her vision so clouded with need that it was difficult for her to focus. Despite the demanding pulsations that hammered through her depths with each heartbeat, it was the fierce lust in Hays's expression that sent her soaring. "If you...keep doing that...I think I will. I...want to."
"I love to feel you come."
"Make me."
"Soon." Hays kept one breast in her hand, lightly biting the nipple, as she slid her palm down Auden's bare abdomen and loosened the waistband on her slacks. She felt Auden tense and drew her mouth away for an instant, "It's all right. Just let me have you."
"Yes. Yes." Auden closed her eyes again and lowered her head until her forehead rested against Hays's hair. She wrapped her arms around Hays' shoulders, keeping her lover close in the circle of her embrace. Her thighs quivered continuously as the pressure built. Her breath made a small sobbing sound as she gasped with each pinpoint of pleasure streaking from her breast. She ached to come, but she did not want the ecstasy to end. "Go slow. Oh please, go slow."
Hays continued to caress one nipple as she pressed a hand inside Auden's slacks, between her legs, and gently enclosed her tense clitoris between her fingers. At the measured, torturous caress, Auden gave a small cry and thrust spasmodically into Hays's palm.
"Easy, darling," Hays soothed, her lips on Auden's neck. "Easy."
"You'll make me come," Auden cried desperately, her head thrown back, her fingers gripping Hays's back. "Oh, you will."
Hays stilled her movements, but kept her fingers resting lightly between Auden's thighs. Incredibly aroused herself, Hays was gasping for breath, her heart pounding erratically. She wanted to pleasure Auden, but she wanted to claim her as well. It took every ounce of willpower she had not to push inside her, to possess her immediately. When Auden's frantic motion slowed, Hays began again, sliding her fingers between swollen folds, drawing moisture from Auden's depths, steadily stroking her clitoris. With her ear now pressed to Auden's heart, Hays led her close to orgasm and then backed off, time and again.
"Oh please," Auden choked, grasping Hays's wrist in one hand then forcing the tormenting fingers inside the places that screamed to be filled, "let me come now."
Wrapping an arm around Auden's waist, Hays braced her legs and pushed deeper. The sudden pressure caused Auden to rear back as she cried out her pleasure. "I've got you," Hays groaned, unable to temper her own rampant need. She pressed her palm hard against Auden's clitoris with each forceful stroke, her pace escalating until Auden stiffened and jerked once, violently, in her arms.
"Oh Hays," Auden cried, clutching Hays's arms as she bent double under the force of the raging orgasm. Then she collapsed, burying her tear-streaked face in Hays's neck. "Unbelievable...oh God..."
Hays stilled her motions but remained inside, marveling at the small contractions that rippled around her fingers. Stroking Auden's hair with her free hand, she kissed the damp skin of Auden's temple. "You are so incredible."
"I love you," Auden sighed, unable to move a single muscle.
God help me, I want it. Hays closed her eyes tightly, pressing her cheek to the top of Auden's head. Gently, she leaned to the side and stretched out on the couch, cradling Auden against her until they were lying side by side. Blindly, she groped around, found the afghan, and pulled it over them. With Auden's head pillowed on her shoulder, she was supremely satisfied.
"Hays?" Auden's voice was somnolent and a bit slurred.
"Hmm?"
"Aren't you...shouldn't I...?"
Hays laughed. "Am I turned on? Christ, yes. Like exploding head kind o
f turned on, and no, you don't need to do anything right now. It's fun to wait sometimes." She kissed Auden, enjoying the way her lips felt, soft and swollen with sex, "And I love holding you, feeling your body relax, knowing I've satisfied you."
"Satisfied me," Auden mumbled, burrowing closer, one leg resting between Hays's. "Ha."
As Auden's breathing eased into the cadence of sleep, Hays watched the fire slowly burn to flickering embers. She kissed the corner of Auden's mouth and saw the ghost of a smile. Her heart was so full, she ached.
Very softly she breathed, "I love you, sweet Auden."
Auden awoke in the darkened room. The fire had long since burned out, and the house was completely still. She lay against Hays' side, her cheek on Hays's chest. It amazed her how normal it felt to wake up in Hays's arms when it was, in fact, such a new experience.
Everything about being with Hays had that strange duality, of being at once something so familiar and, at the same time, so wholly foreign. Hays's hands on her skin, inside her body, was an entirely new sensation, and yet, the joining was so completely right that it felt natural. Giving herself to Hays physically, being claimed by her, was exhilarating and so much more satisfying than she had imagined sex would be. She had anticipated pleasure, but she had expected something similar to the release she had enjoyed by her own hand. She'd been wrong. What she experienced when Hays touched her—when she surrendered all control, loosed all restraints, bared all of her defenses— went far beyond the physical. As she climaxed in Hays's arms, she was no longer alone. That primal connection was more powerful than anything she had ever dreamed, and she knew, without doubt, that she never wanted to lose it. She tightened her hold on the woman in her arms. I never want to lose you.
Eventually, Auden lifted her head and kissed the side of Hays's neck. "Sweetheart?"
"Hmm?" Hays's voice was drowsy.
"We should put the food away and go to bed."
"You uncomfortable? It's so peaceful here."
"It is." Auden ran her hand down Hays' stomach and along one lean thigh. "It's wonderful. But I want very much to be close to you with nothing separating us, not even clothes...and if we get naked here, we'll freeze."
Hays felt a stirring in her stomach at the light caresses. "Well, since you put it that way." She pushed back the cover and slowly sat up. "I'll show you the bedroom and then come down and put the food away."
"Thanks. I'd love to jump into the shower before bed."
"No problem." Hays stood and extended her hand. "Time for that tour."
It was hard for Auden to pay attention to the house, although it was beautiful. The problem was, Hays was even more arresting. Her dark hair was disheveled from their lovemaking and fell onto her face in a distractingly charming way, her shirttail hung loosely outside her trousers, and the top two buttons of her shirt were open enough to afford Auden a tantalizing glimpse of her breasts from time to time. Apparently, being in love caused the majority of brain cells to malfunction, because all Auden could think about was being in bed with Hays and pleasing her the way she herself had been pleased.
"Here's the bedroom," Hays said as she indicated the room beyond the open doorway. "The bath is inside to the right." She reached inside, flipped a switch which lit a bedside lamp, then turned and caught Auden around the waist, pulling her into an embrace. The kiss lasted longer than Hays had intended, Auden's mouth was so warm, so soft, that she was immediately lost in the sweetness. It wasn't until she realized that they were both panting slightly and that Auden's hand was under her shirt, stroking her abdomen and sending delicious tremors down her thighs, that she drew back. "Just something to remember me by while you shower."
"Oh," Auden breathed in a throaty whisper. "Believe me, I won't forget. Hurry back."
"You won't even know I'm gone." Hays kissed her again, then, with one last smile, turned and headed quickly to the staircase and out of sight.
Auden was astounded to discover that it actually hurt to watch Hays walk away. The desire she had felt only seconds before coalesced into a hard ache in the pit of her stomach, and she wasn't sure if it was merely the flush of arousal denied or another newly found emotion—the fear of losing Hays. The arrival of love had opened vistas of possibility and delivered a gemini of inextricably bound sentiments—joy and terror. Auden was at a loss to tell, sometimes, which one it was she felt. Pleasure and pain so often, it appeared, hurt the same.
Moments later, Auden emerged from the bathroom after a hurried shower, a towel wrapped around her body, to discover Hays sitting on the side of the bed, barefoot but still in her clothes. She'd started another fire in the bedroom fireplace and turned out the lights. The room was warm, the air shimmering with firelight and promise.
"Hello again," Auden said as she approached. Now that they were there, in the bedroom, in the undeniably beautiful and intimate surroundings, she felt both shy and excited. Another first time. Another memory to be cherished.
In an unusually hesitant voice, Hays said, "I didn't get undressed. I thought maybe you'd want to do that."
Auden caught her breath, her legs suddenly so weak she had to fight to stay upright. "Oh, yes. Yes, I would."
Slowly, Hays stood and stepped forward until she was inches from Auden. "Is here okay?"
"Perfect." Auden found it difficult to speak, her throat was so filled with emotion. Desire, gratitude, wonder. Slowly, she opened the last buttons on Hays' shirt, spreading the material as she moved down her body. As Hays stood facing the fire, the flames' reflection danced along the surface of her skin like otherworldly fingers. "I love the way you look."
"I'm glad." Hays shivered lightly as Auden bent to kiss the inner surface of her breast. Her need, ignited by their earlier lovemaking, had never abated but had merely steeped, like embers beneath ashes, while they had slept. The merest brush of Auden's gaze inflamed her.
"I'm sorry I'm not as practiced at this as you," Auden murmured, releasing the button on Hays's waistband.
"Oh no," Hays whispered, at once cupping her palm beneath Auden's chin and staring intently into her eyes. "You're exactly what I need. Take your time—I want every touch to last...a lifetime,"
Auden's eyes filled with tears.
"Don't." Hays's voice was tender. "Keep going. You make me feel wonderful. Please."
Smiling tremulously, Auden nodded. Then, as her hands grazed the skin of Hays's abdomen and the muscles tensed at her touch, she forgot her grief, lost in the splendor of the moment. She slipped the shirt from Hays' shoulders and let it fall onto a nearby chair. Hays's nipples were hard, enticingly erect, and Auden couldn't resist fondling them, gently squeezing until Hays softly groaned. Emboldened, Auden brought her mouth to Hays's while sliding her hands into Hays's trousers and pushing them down over her hips. They kissed, their lips the only point of contact as Hays stepped free of the pants.
Releasing the towel, Auden let it drop to join the trousers on the floor, pressed against Hays, and wrapped her arms around her waist She was naked, and Hays's briefs were all that remained between them now.
"Auden," Hays gasped, as she felt Auden's hands caress the length of her back. "I've never...felt like this before."
"Like how?" Auden pressed her mouth to the hollow below Hays's collarbone and sucked lightly on the soft skin. "Hmm?"
"Like...oh..." Hays swayed and had to steady herself by gripping Auden's hips. "Like I could stay in this one spot forever and never want for anything else,"
Auden slowly traced a finger along the inside band of Hays's briefs, running along her hip, then over the crest of bone, and dipping low over her belly. Hays's hips lifted as her legs tensed. "We.caw stay here forever," Auden promised as she worked her palm beneath the material and pressed lower, her fingers threading through soft curls. "But I want...everything."
Hays closed her eyes, her attention riveted on the single focal point of arousal millimeters away from Auden's fingertips. All thought, every sensation, each iota of awareness was fixed on the instan
t when flesh answered need.
"Let's lie down," Auden whispered, withdrawing her hand. "So I can touch you,"
"Oh, Jesus, yes."
Taking Hays by the hand, Auden stepped to the bed and drew the covers down. Then she reached for Hays's briefs. "One last item."
An instant later, they were in bed, Hays half sitting, propped up against the pillows, Auden reclining next to her, supported on a bent elbow so that she could look down the length of Hays's body and touch her anywhere. Everywhere.
"Teach me what you like," Auden said softly, smoothing her palm down the center of Hays's body, then resting a cupped hand between her thighs.
Hays stroked the back of Auden's neck with trembling fingers, staring at the delicate hand lightly holding her. "I like everything you do, I like..." Her throat closed off with a choked whimper as Auden slid one finger along the side of her clitoris.
"That?" Auden's voice was hoarse. A huge fist had closed around her heart, and it was hard for her to breathe. She had never been so excited in her life. She moved her finger, felt the stiff shaft pulse. "Do you like that?"
"Oh, yes. Yes." Hays pressed her left hand hard against the bed, the other clutching Auden's shoulder. She watched Auden stroke her slowly, the twin sensations of sight and touch almost too much to bear. It was so exquisite, her stomach cramped with pleasure.
"You're so wet." Auden smoothed her fingertips through the evidence of Hays's passion, astounded at the rush of warmth between her own thighs. She drew her fingers upward, felt the echoing pulsation in her own engorged flesh. "So hard."
Hays fought to keep her eyes open, but her mind was dissolving into heat and color. Her vision dimmed as Auden's caress became firmer, faster.
"Will this make you come?"
"Uh...huh," Hays managed, staring through half-closed lids at the hand circling between her thighs, every muscle clenched, her hips rocking, nerve endings on the brink of going off in Auden's hand.
Radclyffe - Love's Masquerade Page 24