by Jasmin Quinn
“It’s fine,” Finn said tersely, then walked past her into the bathroom, picking up their toiletries and dropping them into the suitcase. As he zipped up the case, Doug entered the bedroom, closing the door softly behind him. He glanced briefly at Nika, who sidled past Finn and closed the bathroom door behind her.
“Ted has some property up near Port McNeil. It’s nice and remote. You can lay low there for a few days until you sort out what to do,” Doug said.
Finn furrowed his brow at Doug. “You fucking told Ted?”
“You’re welcome, you asshole,” Doug snapped back. “And contrary to what you might think, I’m not a complete moron. I’m going to tell him that mom and dad want to spend a few days up there.”
“Sorry,” Finn muttered. “I’m a little wound up.”
Doug grunted. “The cabin’s off-the-grid, but that’s not a big deal. There’ll be firewood, and there’s a well. I don’t have the exact coordinates. I’ll get them in the morning. Keep your phone on and I’ll text them to you when I’ve connected with Ted.”
“Doug, thanks for this,” Finn said. An awkward silence descended on them until Nika opened the bathroom door.
Then Doug said, “Come on, let’s get the two of you on the road.”
They quietly left the house and Nika wordlessly got into the passenger seat of Finn’s Jeep. Doug glanced dismissively in her direction then brought his attention back to Finn who was standing by the driver’s side of the car. The rain was slowing to a drizzle, but he was conscious that both he and Doug were getting wet. “What will you tell mom and dad?”
Doug shrugged. “I’ll think of something. You and Nika had a fight, broke up, you took her home. Something pitiful like that.”
“You’ll break mom’s heart.”
“That’s where it was heading anyway, wasn’t it?” Doug replied speculatively and then added, “What if they show up here. What should we tell them?”
“The truth as much as you can – that’ll ensure they leave you the fuck alone. Tell them the two of us were here, that we left for some reason – that you weren’t sure where we were going, but assumed it was back to Vancouver.”
Doug let out a shaky breath as Finn tried to reassure him. “Doug, they’ll know I’m a cop, they’ll be wary. They won’t terrorize you – that would draw unwanted attention to them. They’ll knock on the door, pretend they’re someone else looking for me or Nika for some stupid reason. And when they realize we’re not here and you don’t know where we are, they’ll leave you alone. Let mom do the talking – she’ll tell the truth as she knows it.”
Doug smiled. “As if I could stop her from talking.” They both chuckled, then Finn looked at his shoes thoughtfully and then back to Doug.
“Listen, Doug, I –”
But Doug cut him off. “Get going before mom realizes you’re not in your bedroom. It’ll be easier to explain if you’re not here to fuck it up.”
“Right,” Finn opened the driver’s door. “Look after mom and dad.”
Doug nodded. “I’ll text you first thing in the morning. Go.”
Finn started the SUV and turned on the windshield wipers to scatter the raindrops. He turned around in the driveway and drove out to the road. As the house disappeared in his rear-view mirror, he had a sudden sense of foreboding that he might never see his family again.
CHAPTER TEN
Nika was cold, tired and perplexed. She’d barely gotten any sleep and here it was, the middle of the night again and Finn hadn’t really explained what was going on. She watched him from the passenger seat as he drove. She could tell by the set to his jaw that he was angry – at whom she didn’t know. And he wouldn’t look at her, wouldn’t acknowledge her presence. She wanted to ask him what was going on, but she was afraid. He might tell her that she was the problem. She slumped down on her seat, trying to think with her sleep-starved brain.
It certainly wasn’t like her to be afraid to voice her thoughts, demand answers and force her will. But for some reason, with Finn, she was different. She wasn’t sure if it was her uncomfortable attraction to him making her shyer and more malleable, or if it was because she was away from the safety of the compound, which made her reliant on Finn. Who knew what he was really about? She didn’t know him that well despite what Kelsie had told her; in fact, she didn’t know Kelsie that well either.
Her throat tightened as an unfamiliar feeling of panic rose up in her. She’d been afraid last night, but she’d kept her wits about her, truly believed that she could think her way out of her situation. But this was different. She was with a man that she was attracted to, her body telling her to do anything he wanted, her tired mind telling her to be more cautious. In the realm of fight or flight, Nika wanted to run away from him as far as could. But he had the control, she was in his SUV and they were driving up the Malahat in the dead of the night.
“Are you angry with me?” she finally ventured. She didn’t look at him, she kept her eyes cast down to her hands, folded in her lap.
Finn glanced over at her briefly, then back to the road. He was concentrating on his driving as the dark, wet road wound its way up the mountain. “Why don’t you get some sleep. We have a long drive ahead of us – probably early morning before we get in,” he said tersely.
Nika was not giving up. “Into where, Finn?”
“Port McNeill.”
“Why are we going there?”
Silence greeted her and as it stretched between the two of them, Nika’s irritation was growing. She didn’t know how far she could push Finn, but decided she needed to find out. She turned her angry eyes to him.
“Are we having our first fight?” She kept her voice low but clipped. She didn’t want to startle him by yelling and have him drive over the side of the mountain.
Finn sighed heavily. “We’re not fighting, Nika. It’s dark and rainy and this road’s a bitch. I just need to keep my mind on my driving.”
“Really? Because I get the sense that you think I am a child that doesn’t know better and doesn’t deserve an explanation of why I was hauled out of bed in the middle of the night to go to a place that I was not consulted about.” Finn stared at the road, not immediately responding. She could see his jaw working. What was he thinking?
Finally, Finn responded, his face taut with suppressed rage, “I am fully aware that you are not a fucking child, but you lost the right to consult me about anything back on the ferry when you turned my gun on me.”
Nika was disconcerted, but nothing he said abated her frustration. “I thought we moved past that, Finn. I have… complied with all your rules, so I do not understand why you are being so… selective with your information.” She heard her accent deepen, her English break as her heart thudded in her throat.
Finn laughed derisively. “That’s ironic, coming from you.”
Nika drew in a sharp breath. “You know I am not allowed to tell you, Finn.”
“No, actually, I don’t know. All I know is what you’ve told me, which is virtually nothing. Why the hell should I trust you? Why should I believe a single word you’ve said?”
Anger and hurt washed over Nika. “If I am so much trouble for you Finn, you can drop me off at the next town.”
Finn braked abruptly, the tires skidding on the wet road, causing the vehicle to fishtail. As he regained control, Nika grabbed the dash with both hands to anchor herself. He veered sharply into a pullout and shoved the gear shift into park as he swivelled towards her, his face suffused with rage.
“Are you throwing me out here?” Nika gasped, her eyes wide. A knot of fear lodged in the pit of her stomach.
“Listen to me, princess,” Finn lashed out. He wrapped his large hands around her upper arms in a vice-like grip, forcing her to look at him. “You threatened me with my gun and demanded I help you without giving me any reason whatsoever. And I played right into your game – let my cock do my thinking for me. I am not some fucking knight in shining armour, so get over that delusion.”
&n
bsp; Nika’s throat tightened and her eyes started tearing. She shrank from his rage, tried to look away from him, down to her lap. But he moved one of his hands to her chin, forcing her face up, forcing her eyes to meet his cold, furious gaze. “I took you to my parents’ house,” he seethed, “and instead of you telling me that was a bad idea, that the people after you were killers that would stop at nothing to get their hands on you, you got all excited about having dinner with them. We’re not playing house, Nika.”
“I know we’re not playing—” Nika tried to interject, but Finn cut her off, his voice growing deeper and angrier.
“I’m going to tell you this once. I have no choice but to see this through, because the Russians know we’re together. And I won’t get untangled from this mess until you’re back where you belong. So, stop your goddamn chatter about getting out at the next service station and about your right to be consulted. You owe my parents and Doug their safety, so we’re stuck with each other whether you like it or not. And when we finally get to where we’re going, you’re going to start talking – you’re going to tell me everything if I have to beat it out of you. It’s the only way we’re going to get out of this cluster-fuck.” He abruptly released his hold on her and grabbed the steering wheel instead, his shoulders still rigid with rage.
Nika was crying now, openly. She tried to stop the flow of tears by pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes, but it didn’t help. Finn was angry with her, shouting at her. And he was right, at least about some things. Why did she think that he should help her unconditionally? Because he was a cop maybe, and because Kelsie said he would help her, but she had endangered his family. Her stomach twisted in anxiety for herself, for them. She had no idea how to make things right with Finn.
She sensed his hostile gaze on her. Watching her cry. “Do you understand?” His voice softened slightly.
Nika nodded miserably.
“Good.” Finn shifted the SUV into drive and pulled back onto the high-way. “Get some sleep,” he added tersely.
✽✽✽
Finn watched as Nika turned her back to him, kicking her shoes off and tucking her feet under her, curling herself up into a small protective ball. He could hear her sniffling, but it sounded like she had stopped crying. He was a complete prick, yelling at her like that, forcing her to look at him. She deserved the tongue lashing, but truthfully, he was just as furious at himself and he’d taken that anger out on her. No matter how he tried to convince himself this was somehow her doing, he knew the truth. Something primal escaped his soul when he first saw her. Something he couldn’t contain.
It was more than just her beauty that unleashed his beast; there was something about her that was naïve and unworldly, an incredible vulnerability that he found tempting and provocative. He knew that he wanted her, knew from the first time he laid eyes on her that she would be his. She brought out a fierceness and possessiveness that made him question who he was. It was an unsettling revelation and clashed with everything he believed about himself.
He tried to deny it – refused at first to believe that he was the kind of man who could become obsessed and enslaved by a woman, but Nika was different, forcing feelings in him he’d never known. He understood what that meant. He wasn’t going to let her go. He would protect her with his life and kill anyone that tried to get between them. He wasn’t sure what Nika thought of him and it didn’t matter. She was his from the moment he encountered her and would be for the rest of his life.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Nika woke up to the wind howling. What had been rain in the south was now snow up north. Her immediate first thought was that she wasn’t dressed for the weather, her immediate first emotion was fear. Finn was pulling up to a service station and he looked over at Nika as she straightened up and looked out the window. “Where are we?” she asked tentatively, not sure if she should be speaking, not sure how he would react. He gazed at her, looking tired and grizzled, but still so good. She felt the now familiar heat in her belly again, that only he seemed to generate. And then she wondered how she could still be so attracted to him after his angry words last night.
“Port Neill,” he replied as he studied her. Then he sighed and reached over towards her, drawing his fingers through her hair, touching her head gently. “I’m sorry I’m such an asshole. You’re bringing out the worst in me.”
Nika nodded, savouring the warm caress of his hand on her head, his fingers in her hair. She shivered as goosebumps trailed their way up her body, her nipples hardening. What was he doing to her that he could have such an affect? She reached up reluctantly and took his hand from her hair. She needed him to stop before she became unaccountable for her actions. As she moved his hand away from her and placed it on the steering wheel, she said, “I accept your apology.” She didn’t add that he was apologizing for the wrong thing. Him being an asshole wasn’t what made her cry last night, it had more to do with his angry words. She saw him grin slightly, though she didn’t know why. “And I’m sorry too, Finn, that I did not explain the seriousness of my situation and that I am the one to blame if your family is in danger.”
She waited for Finn to tell her that he forgave her too. But he didn’t. Instead he said, “We need to get gas and some food supplies. Some winter gear. We’re going inland to a cabin that belongs to someone I know. I think it’s a good place to hide for a few days.” She frowned at him, not because he was taking her somewhere isolated but because he had not accepted her apology. She wasn’t afraid anymore, like she had been last night. The sleep and Finn’s apology helped her put things back into perspective.
“How can I help?” She decided that this truce was a good thing and that she would like it to keep going, so she would forgive him for not accepting her apology – for now. But apologies and acceptances of them were a two-way street. He would have to forgive her eventually if they were going to fix things.
“I don’t think we should be seen together, they’ll be looking for a couple and we’re going to stand out enough dressed like we just arrived from Mexico.”
Nika surveyed her clothing thinking she would be wearing shorts if she just arrived from Mexico. Finn continued, unaware of his error. “Go use the bathroom, then sit in the café and have some coffee and breakfast if you’re hungry. I’ll get the gas and supplies. Sit by the window and watch for me. I’ll bring the Jeep back here. Once you see me leave the pumps, take about 10 more minutes and then get me a coffee to go and come out. I’ll leave the Jeep open so you can get in. Okay?”
Nika pursed her lips, not happy. She felt useless – he was doing everything, and her job was simply to stay away from him. Finn picked up on her vibe. “Nika, I meant what I said last night. We’re in this together. Don’t do a runner.”
Nika looked at him with a furrowed brow, “I am not going to do a ‘runner’ because where would I go, Finn? I have no money and I don’t have the right winter gear. And besides, I need you and I owe you.” She hated admitting it, but at least she only told him part of the truth. She didn’t just need him, she wanted him. She wanted to stay close to him, to be with him. She was suddenly bereft at the idea that she could ever be without him. But he didn’t need to know that, not right now.
Finn pulled open his wallet and handed her a $20. “For the coffee and food. Get going.”
Nika yanked open the door and stalked away, toward the 24-hour diner. It was freezing outside – she was shivering and thought her lips might be turning blue. At least she had a light jacket on, but that wasn’t going to do her any good further inland. She wondered if Finn would be able to get them what they needed. Does a gas station sell boots, and coats and wool hats?
The diner was practically empty when she entered. A single grizzled old man at one of the tables, and a waitress, thin with badly dyed red hair, standing with a coffee pot in hand, chatting to him. The waitress glanced curiously over as Nika slid into a booth by the window, rubbing her upper arms to warm up. She could see Finn as he drove up to the gas pump, g
ot out and then gassed up. The wind was dancing around him, tugging at his jacket, rifling through his hair. He looked miserable, shoulders hunched, pulling his coat sleeve over his hand to protect it as he held the gas nozzle. She shivered for him.
The waitress came over dragging Nika’s attention away from Finn. “Looks like you’ve had a hard night, hun. You traveling alone?”
Nika nodded solemnly as the waitress flipped a cup over and poured some coffee into it without asking Nika if that’s what she wanted.
“You want anything to eat?”
“No, I don’t,” Nika said, certain that food in her unsettled stomach would cause her to vomit.
“Let me know if you change your mind.” The waitress sauntered away.
Nika looked outside again as she wrapped her hands around her coffee cup, relishing the warmth. Finn was just getting in his Jeep. A small frission of fear slid down her spine as he pulled away from the pumps, swinging around and heading back to where he’d previously parked, around the corner and out of her sight. Panic stabbed at her, taunted her. He was going to leave her, stranded here alone with only his $20 and her $36 dollars. She took a gulp of the coffee with shaking hands and set the cup down hard, causing the saucer to rattle and the black liquid to splash over the rim. She stood up abruptly, digging the $20 out of her pocket and throwing it down on the counter beside the cash register. It didn’t matter that 10 minutes hadn’t passed. Nika had to make sure Finn was still here, that he hadn’t changed his mind and left her.
“Could I have a cup to go please?” Nika asked the waitress as she offered the cash.
“Of course, hun. Cream and sugar?”
Nika nodded. She didn’t know what Finn took in his coffee, but cream and sugar would cover all the possibilities. The waitress returned with the coffee and gave Nika the change from the $20. Nika pocketed it and walked out of the diner. As she rounded the corner, she drew in a breath of relief. Finn’s SUV was there, the doors unlocked, just as he said they would be. As Nika climbed in, her panic was replaced by relief and gratitude. Finn was a man of his words and that made her feel secure. Without him, she would be lost, literally yes, but also emotionally. She had no choice but to rely on him, but it was more than that. The thought that might have left her squeezed at her heart. She didn’t want to never see him again, she didn’t want to ever be without him.