by Debra Webb
All he wanted.
All he needed.
“Should we be worried?” Reg asked, breaking into Tom’s thoughts.
He shrugged. “I don’t know, Reg.” Tom had never been so torn in his life. He didn’t want to make Jane look bad by going after them unnecessarily. But still, every moment they delayed was precious time. Once it was dark, their chances of finding them would diminish greatly.
“You, Hattie and I could split up and head out after them if you think we should.” Reg suggested quietly. “It might be best not to wait much longer.”
Reg had read his thoughts. Tom looked at his watch again. “We’ll give them another half hour. If they’re not back by five, we’ll head out.”
Reg sighed. “They’re probably just enjoying the scenery.”
“Maybe,” Tom allowed optimistically, “but I doubt it. Chances are they’re wet and muddy, and they’re definitely out of food.”
Reg lifted a skeptical eyebrow. “I see your point.”
Tom refused to consider that something might have happened to Jane. He frowned. Then again, even the best swimmer could drown. Jane might know how to handle herself, but accidents still happened.
Tom pushed up from the steps. “Maybe we’ll go ahead and start now.”
“I’ll get Hattie,” Reg offered, already up and heading toward the dining cabin.
The sound of Sandra Suddath’s practiced southern belle tone was like music to Tom’s ears. He turned toward the edge of the woods beyond the empty quadrangle. The chattering group of women emerged from the trees smiling and laughing as if they’d had the time of their lives. As they grew neared Tom could see that they were indeed muddy and frazzled looking, but that didn’t seem to have darkened their moods. He frowned when he didn’t see Jane among those in front. His chest constricted with fear.
Several women started to wave and call hellos, and it was then Tom saw the thing that made his concerns a reality. Beulah, Veronica and a couple of other ladies lugging a makeshift stretcher…carrying Jane.
“What the hell?” Tom blinked and looked again.
“Well, I’ll be,” Reg said, shaking his head in disbelief. “Who would have thought this group could pull together for anything?”
Tom rushed to Jane’s side, worry dogging every step. “What happened?” he demanded hoarsely.
“It’s not as bad as it looks,” Jane assured him with a tremulous smile.
“Stand back, Mr. Caldwell,” Beulah ordered. The ladies lowered Jane, on the bedrolls they had fastened together for a stretcher, to the ground.
Jane looked up and gave the ladies a wide smile. “Good job, ladies. I’m very proud of all of you.”
Beulah and Veronica slapped a high five. Others were hugging and crying tears of what appeared to be joy. Tom couldn’t be sure what had happened on that mountain, but whatever it was, it had done these ladies a world of good. They had never looked this happy after a workout. And Jane, well, she was the most beautiful vision he’d ever laid eyes on.
He turned his full attention to Jane and crouched down next to her makeshift stretcher. “Are you all right?”
She reached for his hand. “I think it’s just a bad sprain and a lot of bruising.”
Tom wrapped his fingers around her small hand. His heart stumbled at the overwhelming protective feeling that squeezed his chest. The full impact of the past three hours of pacing hit him square in the gut. “Dammit, Jane, I’ve been worried sick.”
The smile she flashed him did strange things to his insides. “We’re back safe and sound. So how about helping me up,” she suggested.
He nodded, not trusting himself to speak at the moment. Tom gingerly lifted Jane to her feet. She was as light as a feather. He slid one arm around her waist for support. “I could carry you,” he offered.
Jane glanced at the group of ladies who were engrossed in retelling the day’s events to a seemingly fascinated Reg. Even Hattie had come out to greet them.
“That might not be a good idea. These ladies don’t miss anything.”
Tom flicked a glance at the disheveled bunch, and then at Reg and Hattie. “I guess you’re right. But I want to get you inside so I can get a better look at that ankle.”
Before Jane could respond, the sound of an approaching vehicle captured her attention. A U.S. Army hummer braked to a stop a few feet away. Tom wasn’t expecting anyone from the post. He felt Jane stiffen in his arms.
To Tom’s surprise, General Suddath emerged from the passenger side of the vehicle. As he approached, Jane pulled out of Tom’s arms and came to attention. Tom glanced at the injured foot now planted firmly on the ground. He knew it had to hurt like hell.
“General Suddath, sir,” Jane announced and performed a practiced salute.
The general returned her salute. “At ease, sergeant.”
A hush fell over the women who were still recounting their tales to Reg. Sandra smiled and waved coyly at her husband. The general braced his hands on his hips and surveyed the scene for a long, tense moment before returning his gaze to Jane.
“What’s going on here, sergeant?” He looked Jane up and down. “And where’s your headgear?”
“We’ve just returned from bivouac, sir. We had a little trouble and I lost my headgear.”
General Suddath glanced at his wife and the other ladies once more. His expression was disapproving, to say the least. “I’d say you had more than a little trouble, sergeant.”
Tom didn’t like the way this was going. He saw Jane tremble and he instinctively knew it was motivated by the difficulty of standing. Jane Passerella wouldn’t show any outward display of fear when faced with a mere general. She was too polished, too professional for that. It had to be the pain.
“Yes, sir,” Jane agreed.
“Perhaps we should discuss this issue further back at my office, sergeant.”
“Of course, sir,”
Fury rushed through Tom. No, by God, there would be no further discussion at this time. In one smooth, unexpected move, Tom swept Jane into his arms before she could take the first step.
“General, I’m afraid you’re discussion will have to wait. Sergeant Passerella is injured and I intend to do something about that right now.”
“If that is the case,” the general began, arresting Tom’s departure, “if you can’t handle a march without injuring yourself, Sergeant Passerella, perhaps I should dismiss you and assign someone else to this camp.” The older man glanced first at Jane, then his belligerent gaze locked with Tom’s. The general was not accustomed to having his orders challenged by anyone, military or civilian.
“Please, Tom, Jane murmured. “Don’t make this worse than it already is.”
Tom took one look at Jane’s stricken face and knew he had made a mistake only a civilian would make. He shouldn’t have interfered. He told her with his eyes how much he regretted his actions.
“Just one cotton-pickin’ minute,” Sandra Suddath bellowed as she stormed forward. She looked a sight, all mud-splattered and mussed, but she aimed a ferocious glare at the general that made even Tom squirm. “If Jane goes, I go,” she announced. “And I will be one unhappy camper if I have to go home early.”
“Sandra.” The general glanced around uneasily, then settled his indulgent gaze on his beloved wife. “This is neither the time nor the place to question my authority,” he reprimanded her gently.
Sandra reached up and shook her finger in his face. “George Suddath, you get right back into that hummer and go home. You’re on my turf here.”
The general lifted one gray eyebrow. “Well, if you feel that strongly about it—”
“I do,” Sandra insisted firmly.
“Whatever you say, dear,” General Suddath relented. He turned back to Jane. “Well, sergeant, it appears I’ve grossly misjudged the situation.” He nodded in silent approval. “Carry on, Sergeant Passerella.”
“Thank you, sir,” Jane returned.
The general leaned down and placed a
n affectionate kiss on his wife’s muddy cheek. “I’ll see you next Sunday, my dear.”
Sandra batted her lashes at him, and one flopped as if it might fly off at any moment. “Bye, George,” she called as he climbed back into the vehicle and disappeared through the gate.
Wearily, Jane rested her head against Tom’s shoulder. Tom knew he had just been given her approval to take care of her. And he intended to do just do that.
~*~
Jane tried not to consider what the general had in store for her. Had Sandra not stepped in, Jane would certainly be back on her way to the post right now. She wondered at Sandra’s about-face. Somehow the two of them had bonded during the past week. Jane let go a big breath. She had seen the respect in Sandra’s eyes when they’d had that little one-on-one chat. Jane had realized that the other woman’s southern belle graciousness could be turned on and off at will. She was glad to be on Sandra’s good side, for whatever reason.
“Here you go.” Tom sat down on the bed next to Jane and offered her a glass of iced tea.
“Thank you.” She accepted the refreshment, then sipped it while keeping her eyes carefully averted from his. Maybe it would have been better if she had gone back to the post with the general. Tom wanted to talk about things that Jane would rather avoid. How could she make him understand that they had no future together? The pain in her ankle was nothing compared to what her heart stood to suffer if she let what happened between them develop into something more. It just couldn’t go any further.
As if it hadn’t gone too far already.
Tom had removed her boots and propped her injured foot on a stack of plump pillows. He agreed with her assessment that nothing appeared broken, but that hadn’t kept him from wanting to rush her to the emergency room. Jane caught herself before she sighed. Tom tempted her with something she knew better than to want. Jane relaxed more deeply into the pillows he had placed behind her and reminded herself not to get used to this. Everything about her stint at Camp Serenity was temporary. General Suddath’s unexpected visit today had done nothing but drive the point home for Jane. She and Tom were from two different worlds, but with no place to meet in the middle.
Jane closed her eyes and pushed the memory of his sweet lovemaking away. This was all temporary, she reminded herself.
“Tell me what else I can do to make you feel better,” he offered softly.
Jane set her glass on the table next to her bed and braced for the explosion of emotions meeting his gaze would detonate. “There’s nothing else you can do, Tom,” she said in as strong a voice as she could marshal. Somehow she had to make him understand that a relationship between them would never work. Heat and desire rushed through her veins when she at last looked into his eyes.
He placed one hand on either side of her and leaned closer. “You’re sure about that?” His gaze lingered on her lips, making Jane’s heart pound in spite of her determination not to react.
“Positive,” she replied without conviction.
Those twinkling blue eyes searched her face. His lips slid into a slow, knowing smile. “Did you know that you have the cutest freckles?”
Jane curbed her own smile. “Freckles are not cute, Tom,” she argued. “They’re a skin abnormality.” He leaned closer still. Jane’s breath caught.
He kissed the tip of her nose then pressed his forehead to hers and sighed. “Tell me you don’t feel this, Jane. Tell me and I’ll pretend I don’t.” His warm breath whispered across her lips, sending a fresh wave of need through her. “I have to know.”
Jane’s hands went to his broad shoulders. The feel of hard male muscle beneath her palms made her ache for his touch. “Tom, it’s not that simple. What you feel right now won’t be enough.”
He tilted his head, putting his lips temptingly close to hers. “We don’t need to complicate the issue. Yes or no, that’s all I need to hear.”
Desire, electric and alive, made Jane clench her fists into his shirt. “Yes, damn it, yes. I feel it. The problem is, what are we going to do about it?”
Tom brushed a kiss across her lips, and the sweetness and tenderness of it shattered the last of her defenses. How could she refuse this man? Whatever the future held for her, the one thing Jane wanted right now was to feel Tom’s arms around her.
“Don’t worry,” he murmured between kisses that quickly turned hot and frantic. “We’ll figure something out. I promise.”
As his lips closed over hers, Jane did something she had never done before in her entire military career: she put the future out of her mind and concentrated on the present.
On this moment with Tom.
~*~
Tom finally realized what it was he worried that he might miss. That one elusive thing that always seemed to escape him because he was so absorbed in his work. He had somehow instinctively known that without it, he would never be complete. Never be as happy or fulfilled as he could be. But he couldn’t quite grasp what it was.
He knew now.
Jane. Of course, he hadn’t known her until two weeks ago. But she was that one thing that was missing in his life. She completed him. They had made love every night this past week. Sometimes at his cabin, sometimes at hers. Once even in the showers when everyone was safely tucked in for the night. Desire welled inside him even now. Jane was everything he wanted, and all he would ever need. And he was about to lose her.
General Suddath had already informed Tom that another drill sergeant would be assigned to Camp Serenity during the final four-week session. Jane wouldn’t say what had transpired during that one appearance she’d been commanded to make at the general’s office. But Tom had a feeling that it hadn’t been good, at least not for Jane. It was so damned unfair. He desperately wished she would confide in him.
But she wouldn’t.
Jane was leaving.
And Tom’s life would never be the same.
Tom watched without really seeing as the twelve retreat participants put on a fashion show, hosted by Reg, for their attentive spouses. All twelve women had shed at least five pounds. Each sported a fully accessorized ensemble as they paraded across the stage like newly discovered models. Tom had observed with astonishment the change in them during the past week, the leading example set by Sandra Suddath. No one complained. They all worked together and followed instructions. Reg had been so impressed with their newfound interest and cooperation that he had planned this fashion show as a reward. Even Hattie’d had a change of heart. The elderly cook had insisted on preparing a sit-down dinner for today’s farewell festivities. Tom was absolutely amazed.
In just twenty-four hours twenty teenagers would fill the cabins outside. All would return to normal.
Except Tom’s heart.
An announcement from Sandra Suddath jerked Tom from his brooding. Sandra motioned for Jane to come forward. Tom turned to the woman sitting beside him in her fancy military uniform. His chest tightened as she stood and slowly walked to the front of the room. Jane still limped a little, but that didn’t stop her. Tom sat up straighter in his chair, his gaze glued to the woman in her official military dress uniform.
“Sergeant Jane,” Sandra began, then paused to swipe at her tear-filled eyes. “We’ll never be able to fully relate the way you’ve touched our lives. But the other ladies and I wanted to somehow show our appreciation to you for all you’ve done.”
“That’s not necessary, Mrs. Suddath,” Jane insisted, her voice wavering.
“Well, you know how the Army is,” Sandra said with a wave of her hand, “We’ll use any excuse to give someone a plaque.”
Laughter rumbled through the dozen military officers in attendance. Even Tom smiled. Sandra was quite a character. Tom didn’t miss Reg and even Hattie taking the occasional swipe at their eyes.
Beulah stepped forward and passed a wood and brass plaque to Sandra. Sandra held the plaque at arm’s length and recited the inscribed words.
“To Sergeant Jane Passerella,” she read. “For dedication above and beyo
nd the call of duty.” She paused to compose herself, then cleared her throat and continued, “For your never-ending patience and caring attitude.” Sandra lowered the plaque and turned to Jane. “And for never saying die when faced with the impossible.” Sandra threw her arms around Jane and hugged her close.
General Suddath was the first to stand when the applause echoed through the room. The show of appreciation from the audience, as well as from the ladies who were taking turns hugging Jane, went on and on. Tom waited as patiently as he could while each of the officers thanked Jane, Reg, and Hattie. They all shook his hand too, but he barely paid attention. He just wanted to reach Jane.
It seemed like forever before the crowd started to thin and move toward the dining room for Hattie’s dinner. Finally Tom had Jane alone. He watched as she admired her plaque. He wondered if she were stalling. Who was he kidding? He knew she was stalling.
She wanted to slip out of his life as quickly and suddenly as she had dropped in. Temporary duty, that’s all her time here had been.
Tom tucked his hands into his pockets and walked over to where Jane stood quite obviously ignoring him. “Mission accomplished, Sergeant Passerella.”
Jane turned and gifted him with a watery smile. “So it would seem,” she agreed. A definite hint of sadness tinged her voice.
Tom stared at the floor for a time, afraid to say what he wanted to say, yet even more afraid of not saying it. He lifted his gaze back to Jane’s and knew now was the time. The next few minutes would affect the rest of his life as well as hers. Tom knew beyond all doubt that if he let her slip away from him without at least asking her to stay, he would always regret it.
“Jane—”
Jane shook her head, cutting him off. Her eyes were suspiciously bright. “Don’t say it, Tom,” she pleaded. “Anything we say now will only make it more difficult for both of us to do what we know we have to.”
He struggled with the anxiety mounting inside him. No way could he just watch her walk out. “So you want to take the easy way out, is that it?”