“I wanted to, Gabriel. Especially when you were a prick to Mom or talked as if all his problems were her fault. You just don’t know how many times I wanted to shut you the fuck up, but Mom never wanted you to find out.”
“Now I’m struggling to know dad was a bastard and Mom had to fight him to raise us.”
“I have a feeling she did more than fight him.”
What the hell is Zander hinting at?
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I remember the sounds that used to come from their room. I could never block that shit out.”
“You mean, he would force himself on her?”
Zander shrugs and stares into his glass before he answers, “I don’t know. All I know is, she won’t ever tell us, but if I had to guess, yeah, I think the motherfucker would rape her.”
How could I have blocked all of this out? I remember a lot of yelling and screaming, but I don’t have any memory of it being that bad.
“I don’t know how I could have been so oblivious to it all.”
“I think you just put all the blame on Mom because you wanted a dad. By the time I was old enough to enjoy him, he wasn’t the man you seemed to remember, and with Liam we both protected him. When we knew shit was going on, we entertained him so he wouldn’t notice.”
“I do remember that. I just wish I hadn’t been so blind. I don’t know how to express how sorry I am for always treating Mother like I did.”
“Well, we all have things to be sorry for. I’m sorry I allowed Mom to keep me from talking about it or protecting her. I wanted to kill him that night when I saw what he had done to her. I saw her raw for the first time. She was free of makeup, the bruises were so severe, and there were scars, Gabriel.” He throws his glass across the room and shouts, “Fucking scars, Gabriel! I look at her sometimes, and I see all is her beauty, but then I remember all the scars. I prayed I would forget about them, but I can’t. I have fucking nightmares about what I saw. I seriously don’t know how she covers what I’ve seen. But Gabriel, you can’t fuck with her anymore, now that it’s all out in the open. I won’t put up with you emotionally abusing her. Not anymore.”
“I promise, Zander. I’m sorry. I’m the oldest, and I feel like I let everyone down.”
“You weren’t given a choice, Gabriel. Imagine how I feel. I knew and did nothing. I let her convince me it was for the best. I’ve been sorry about it for a long fucking time.”
He gets up and leaves without another word.
I’m such an asshole.
40
Fallon
We stayed with Catherine the whole weekend. The first night I tried to eat dinner, but my stomach turned again. The second night, it was the smell. Later that night, Catherine brought me saltines, saying it would help my stomach. It helped, and I was then able to go to sleep. In the morning, I had to fight Gabriel to go to work. Catherine came and went during the night, taking my temperature, but I never had one, which, oddly, almost seemed to make her happy. Odd, but she was so helpful, I ignored her expressions. Maybe she was just happy to put her mothering skills back to use.
For the rest of the weekend, I worked on the files, learning as much as I could in-between being sick. On Monday, I had to get out of the house, so I told Catherine I was going to go out shopping. I knew I wouldn’t be long, but I needed the fresh air. She agreed so long as I came back after lunch. We had an appointment she wanted me to come along on.
Catherine wanted me to take Vin with me, but I refused. I wasn’t going far, and I felt the need to be babysitter-free. About an hour in, I called Brittany and asked if she wanted to meet me for an early lunch. My stomach was finally settling after another morning episode with the toilet. We agreed to meet at a bistro a couple of blocks away from me.
After a little more shopping, I walk towards the bistro when a man comes up from behind me and aggressively grabs my arm. He shows me a gun and says not to make a scene, saying if I don’t go with him, he will make me sorry. He also says he has a man with Gabriel. I go with him peacefully and I’m thrown into a van, where there is another man waiting. He ties me up and holds a gun to me. We drive for what seems like forever; at least two hours. When we stop, I’m then shoved out of the van. Disoriented, I notice a small, old looking house and lots of trees, nothing else. I am at a secluded location, and I have no idea where we are. They quickly throw me into a room with only a mattress on the floor. I scream for them to let me go, but they only laugh while they shut the door. I then hear the dreadful turn of the lock. I continue to scream until another scream catches my attention; it’s a woman’s scream, and loud crying. Where the hell am I? Who else is here, and why?
Catherine
I get a call from Brittany, asking if Fallon is with me. I tell her no, and she proceeds to tell me Fallon had called her and arranged to meet her for lunch, but she never showed. She states she has been waiting for over half an hour and has tried to call her, but it keeps going straight to voicemail. I ask her to wait for a while longer, that I’m sending Vin out to look for her. She gives me the names of the stores Fallon last went shopping at. I hang up, sitting with a strong feeling of dread. Finally, I call Vin.
Vin calls me about an hour later, saying there is no sign of Fallon, but he did find her purse, as well as her car. I call Zander and ask him to pick up Gabriel. I tell him to bring him straight here, it’s an emergency. I don’t want him driving here knowing anything is wrong; not until I have my boys here, safe at home.
Knowing something has happened to her, I also call Liam home. She wouldn’t just leave, not without her purse and car. I call in a few favors to put feelers out for any suspicious moves being made. I also call my girls and tell them to be on the lookout.
Now waiting, I’m wondering if there is any reason for my family to be under attack, or could it possibly be? That son-of-a-bitch! If he touched her, I'll kill him! That’s if Gabriel doesn’t first. How do I explain it, if he did have something to do with Fallon’s disappearance? No, he wouldn’t. How could he know? I know he asked about her, he said her face was familiar. The way he kept asking. I just kept putting him off. Could he have figured it out? Shit, please, Lord please, don’t let it be so.
I hear noise from the entryway, but I’m frozen; I can’t bring myself to go to it. I have been sitting here waiting and praying to hear any news from my associates, but nothing yet. Gabriel is going to go crazy.
“She’s in her office,” I hear Liam say.
They all walk in, seeing the devastation written all over my face.
Immediately, Zander asks, “Mom, what’s wrong? What’s going on?”
Finding my voice, I ask, “Boys, I need to know right now from any of you, would there be any reason this family would be under attack? Think hard.”
Gabriel yells, “What the fuck is going on?”
“Gabriel, I need to know if there is anything I am not aware of. Anything at all, even the smallest disagreement.”
“No, Mom, none, you know everything. The only problem I’ve had was personal.”
“What personal problem, Gabriel?”
“I had a problem with Angelle. She refuses to accept Fallon as my wife. She said I embarrassed her whole family and swore I’d be sorry.”
I’m quiet, trying to place all this information. Would the Senator risk my wrath over his daughter's broken heart? I don’t think so.
Vin walks in with Fallon’s purse and the keys to her car. He whispers to me that he had another guard drive the car and he found Brittany. He had her brought home, since she was devastated.
Gabriel yells out, “What the hell is Vin doing with Fallon’s purse and keys? Mom, what the fuck is going on?”
“Gabriel, sit down.”
He sits, holding on to Fallon’s purse.
“Fallon was taken. She went shopping and never returned. I had Vin go look for her, and he found her purse and car.”
All my boys stand at full attention.
“What? She was taken?
By whom?” Gabriel hollers.
“I don’t know, son. That’s why I asked if we could be under any attack. I called in some favors, and I have people searching. I also have some feelers out for any movement on the streets.” I walk over to him and gather him into my arms. “We’ll find her, Gabriel. I promise, son.”
“I have to do something.”
“No, you and your brothers have to stay here. We don’t know what’s going on yet, and I don’t want to risk my children. I have done everything I know possible. We will find her, just be patient, please, boys; be patient. It’s only been a couple of hours. If someone wants to get to us, she is worth more alive than dead.”
I decided to wait till later to tell Gabriel about my suspicions. Maybe it’s not what I think. I pray it’s not.
Gabriel
How did this happen? I know Mom isn’t saying something. I know her enough to know something else is going on, but I’ll leave it for now. I do trust she is doing everything in her power to find Fallon. She would never let this go. So, I’ll sit back for now and be patient.
Mother sends all the servants home, then she orders in extra security and she tells me to call the casino. I make arrangements for the managers to be on watch for any out of the ordinary activities. After my phone calls, I leave the office and rush to the nearest bathroom, feeling like I can't any longer stand. I break down. I slam my fist into the mirror, screaming from rage. I can’t lose her now. I just wasted so much fucking time being stubborn, not wanting to love her, scared of shit that was all in my head. I love her; I do so fucking much.
I stay in the bathroom for a long time, going back and forth over the shitty ways I treated her in the beginning. I let my emotions out, cry secretly, and scream at the top of my lungs. If something happens to her, I won’t forgive myself for not protecting her.
When I finally walk out, I see Zander leaning on the wall, waiting for me. I know he knows what I was doing in there; he seems to have been standing guard, protecting my privacy.
He stands fully and slaps my back. “I got you, brother. We will get her back.”
Nodding, I’m too emotional to speak. He leads me to the kitchen, where Mom’s cooking our dinner.
Catherine
I still haven’t heard anything, so I decide to cook for my boys. If we are under attack, I don’t trust anyone else to do it. That’s why I sent the staff home. I have extra security here, just in case. They will be led by Vin, who I trust with my life. He is like a son to me. I raised him from a boy, and I know he would never hurt me or my family.
Zander walks into the kitchen with Gabriel. We all sit, myself, Vin, and my boys. My whole family is here, just like the old days, but I wish it could be under better circumstances.
After dinner, I retire for the night but sleep never comes. I keep going over all the different scenarios of what could have happened. I just keep going back to him.
The next day, I contact my people, seeing if they have any word; none has come through with anything helpful, at least not yet. I decide I’m going to tell Gabriel everything, but before I can, Gabriel comes into my office with questions.
“I want to know what you’re not telling me, Mom. Before you can say there’s nothing, Fallon told me how you found her at a diner. What the hell was the great Catherine Stern doing in that part of town? Huh, Mom? Why would you go there to find me someone? Unless you already knew there was someone there? You were looking for someone, weren’t you?”
“Gabriel, close the door.”
He does, and I wait for him to sit.
“I didn’t want you to find out like this, but yes, you’re right; I was looking for her, for Fallon.”
“Why? Why Fallon?”
“Gabriel, there is a lot you don’t know about me, but I’m going to tell you, and I hope you can understand. When I was a young girl, I was abandoned by my mother and put into the system. I was all alone and scared to death, until one day I met Laura.”
“What does this have to do with Fallon?”
“Everything. Just listen, son.”
“Laura and I became fast friends. We were the same age. We were living together with a family, and it was hell, Gabriel. The father used to touch me and Laura.”
The memories flood back as my tears start to flow. However, I must continue telling my son about my horrid childhood.
“Gabriel, please, I don’t want you to look at me like that. I need you to understand that is not me anymore. Let me tell you without your pity.”
He nods, but I see he doesn’t like what I’m saying.
“When Laura couldn’t take any more, she asked me to run away with her. I was scared, but it had to be better than what we were living through, and besides, she was my world. The only person I had in life. We ran one night and escaped that house. For days, we didn’t know what to do, or how to live on our own. Then we met Billy. He helped us, taught us how to pickpocket, and how to scam people in the French Quarter. We managed to live like that for years on the streets of New Orleans. Laura and I used to dream of how one day we would meet our Prince Charming, and he would sweep us off our feet. Imagining one day we would have everything, and our children would never go without.”
“Mom, what happened to Laura?”
“I happened, Gabriel; I destroyed her.”
My tears fall on my face, tears I haven’t cried in many years.
“One night, I met your father. He was so handsome and strong. He followed me around the Quarter for days, thinking I had no clue he was there. It’s funny now, looking back on it, how he stalked me. Finally, he approached us with a bag full of burgers. I guess he knew we were hungry living like we were. He wanted to talk to me. He said I was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen and that he wanted to take care of me. I turned him down, but he kept coming back. I couldn’t figure out why he didn’t want Laura; she was so beautiful with her full dark hair, but I knew Billy would never let her go. He was in love with her. Finally, your father offered to pay for me. He made a deal with Billy that if I went with him, he would give them twenty thousand dollars. I didn’t want to go, but I saw the hunger in their eyes as Billy held the money in his hands. Laura said this was my chance, my chance at my Prince Charming, and with the money she would be fine. She wanted me to go and be happy. She insisted Billy would watch over her and I wasn’t going to ever get another chance at happiness.”
I start to laugh through my tears. Happiness; what a cruel joke.
“That day, I left with your father. He was older, and he wanted a wife. So, I became Mrs. William Stern. A trophy wife in every sense of the word. I didn’t love him, but I was content, and he didn’t love me, he just wanted a pretty face, a warm body. I became pregnant with you right away, then later Zander. By the time I was pregnant with Liam, Laura found me. She said it took a while for her to find me, and she needed my help. Billy was still around, but he was willing to let her go if I would help her. So, I agreed and asked your father if she could stay. He allowed it, but I kept her away from him. I was always scared he would do something, I don’t know what, just something. She stayed with me through my whole pregnancy, and months after. We became best friends again, like time never passed.”
Needing a break, I reach into the top drawer of my desk to retrieve my cheap little rosary. I begin to roll the beads between my fingers.
“This rosary was Laura’s. She and I used to say the rosary every night before we fell asleep. Do you recognize it, Gabriel?”
“Is that the rosary you gave to Fallon to wear on our wedding day?”
“Yes. I wanted her to have something of her mother's with her that day.”
I watch as Gabriel pieces together what I’m telling him.
“Laura is Fallon’s mother? Who is her father?”
“This, my son, is where the story gets worse. Laura went missing one day. I searched for two days for her until your father came home, stoned out of his mind. He confessed that Billy had come and wanted money for Laura. He wasn�
�t interested in Laura, but he knew someone who would be. It took me a few days to find her, and when I did...oh God, Gabriel, it was horrible. She was my friend, she needed me, and I failed her. My guys found her in an old house. She had been beaten so badly, you couldn’t recognize her, and she had repeatedly been raped. I got her out of there as carefully as I could. She had so many broken bones. I brought her to a doctor I had paid off to be quiet. I even set her up in a secret apartment. It took months of healing. One day, the doctor told me she was pregnant, and I knew I had to protect her. I hid her as well as I could and begged her to keep the baby. I kept telling her this was her chance at true love. I would take care of her and the baby forever. I did everything I promised. She had the baby, a girl she named Fallon.”
“Does Fallon know any of this?’
“No, Gabriel. Let me tell you the rest. Laura and Fallon stayed in the apartment for about a year. Your father found out what I was doing, and he demanded I get rid of her. When I said I wasn’t going to abandon her, he beat me, Gabriel.”
I lifted my blouse and showed him the scar I received that night at the hands of his dad. I never wanted my sons to see me as anything other than strong, but I needed him to know how hard I tried to save them.
“Your father threw them out of the apartment. Later, I found out he killed Billy, so there was no witness to their transactions. For years, I looked for them, then I thought Laura and Fallon were dead, too. But one day, Laura got in touch with me and said she no longer could handle Fallon. She was eighteen now, and she didn’t want her anymore. She sounded mean and drunk, but then her voice weakened. It trembled as she asked me to take her baby and try to do a better job with Fallon than I did with her. She told me to protect her. When I saw her, I knew you would be the one to protect her. I just had to convince the both of you.”
“Who is Fallon’s father, Mother? Who raped and beat Laura?”
Art of Seduction Page 25