‘What do you want? Jo doesn’t want to know you any more,’ Chloe spat viciously, when she opened the door.
‘Look, I made a mistake. I love Jo and I really need to see her,’ Vinny replied, in an extremely loud voice. He could tell by the way that Chloe was behaving that Joanna was inside.
Having been mortified by Vinny’s rejection of their child the previous day, Joanna crept out of her bedroom. She had heard Vinny say he loved her and deep in her soul, she had known what they’d shared between them was real. Apart from confiding in Chloe, she had told nobody else about what had happened. ‘It’s OK, Chloe. Vinny and I need to speak,’ she said, in almost a whisper.
‘Well, he’s not coming in here,’ Chloe replied bluntly.
‘Babe, let’s talk in my car. I’m so sorry,’ Vinny said. The tears in his eyes were real, although more to do with his cousin’s death, and the thought of Ahmed waking up.
As they walked towards the car, Joanna allowed Vinny to hold her hand. ‘Have you changed your mind about the baby? I’m so sorry for what my dad did to your brother, but I need to know where I stand, Vinny.’
Vinny gave Joanna his most intense stare. ‘I was a fool, babe, to say what I said. I want to be with you, and I want us to have this baby. Can you forgive me?’
Holding Vinny tighter than she had ever held him before, Joanna smiled. ‘Of course I can forgive you.’
Michael’s feet felt like lead bricks as he bravely held his Auntie Viv’s hand and escorted her into the morgue. They had already been warned that Lenny’s injuries were not a pretty sight, and Michael had begged his aunt to let him identify the body alone, but Vivian was having none of it. ‘I will never believe my wonderful boy is dead unless I see it with my own eyes,’ she had snapped.
When the sheet was pulled back, Michael couldn’t help but retch, then turn away. Lenny’s head looked as if somebody had tried to saw it off and had then stopped halfway.
‘My baby! My beautiful baby boy,’ Vivian screamed. Seconds later, she threw herself on top of her son’s corpse, and began kissing him.
‘We have to go now, Auntie Viv. We know it’s definitely Champ,’ Michael said, tears rolling down his cheeks.
‘Noooo! I can’t leave him. I’m his mother. He’ll be lonely here all on his own. I’m taking him home with me,’ Vivian sobbed, as she tried to lift her lifeless son’s body.
It then took ten minutes, two extra men, and Michael to finally drag a hysterical Vivian out of the morgue. She was one hundred per cent inconsolable.
Queenie paced up and down willing the phone to ring. She needed to know how Roy had coped with the news. Little Vinny was bored and miserable, so Queenie ordered him to go out and play, before heading into the lounge and sitting down opposite Brenda and Tara, who were hugging one another and crying. ‘Dry them eyes now, come on, else you’ll start me off again,’ Queenie urged.
‘Mummy says Daddy don’t love us any more and he might not come back,’ Tara sobbed.
Queenie looked at her daughter in disgust. ‘Whatever are you saying silly stuff like that to her for?’
‘Well, Dean didn’t seem very overjoyed about my period being late, did he? He couldn’t get out the door quick enough and he hasn’t come back.’
Queenie shook her head in utter disbelief. ‘Do you know what, Bren, I often wonder if the hospital gave me the wrong baby when I brought you home. Your cousin has just been killed in a car crash, and all you can think about is you, you, you. You really are one self-centered little mare. You make me fucking sick.’
Pleased that he had managed to talk Joanna around to keeping their baby, Vinny stopped at a phonebox. He knew the news wouldn’t exactly cheer his mum up, but he wanted to give her hope of some kind. ‘Mum, it’s me. How’s Auntie Viv?’
‘Awful, boy. Michael said she tried to take Lenny out the morgue with her. Nearly did by all accounts. I can’t get no sense out of her at all now. I gave her a brandy to try and calm her down, but it’s as though she’s on a different planet. Do you think I should call a doctor?’
Vinny had never felt guilt like it before, but what could he do? He had to try to act normal. ‘Mum, don’t call no doctor or do anything rash until I get home. The last thing we need is Auntie Viv to be carted off to a nuthouse.’
‘OK, love. Have you spoken to Roy yet?’
‘No, but I am on my way to see him now. He was sleeping earlier. I’ve spoken to Joanna though and she’s gonna keep the baby. I will buy a house for her to live in near yours.’
‘Good lad. I’ve been thinking today about that Turk. Broken all our hearts, he has. If he survives, I hope you’re going to sort it? Because if you don’t, I will.’
Vinny was relieved when the pips saved him from answering his mother’s difficult question. He loved Ahmed like a brother and there was no way he could kill him. If push came to shove then Michael would have to do the deed.
Roy unscrewed the bottle and took a large gulp of the brandy. He wasn’t nervous, he was more excited than anything.
Glancing at his watch, Roy laid the letters on the bed, then took his gun out of its cloth. Vinny would be here any minute and he was good and ready for him.
At six o’clock exactly, Roy felt a flutter in his stomach when he heard the tap on his door. ‘Who is it?’ he asked, putting a jumper on his lap to hide the gun.
‘It’s Vinny. The carer told me to come straight to your room.’
‘Come in then.’
Vinny entered the room and was just about to tell his brother about Lenny’s death, when Roy pointed a gun at him. ‘What the fuck you doing, bruv? Put it down,’ Vinny said, in a shaky voice.
Roy stared at his brother. He could see the fear in his eyes and that pleased him greatly. ‘Sit on the chair, Vin. It’s me giving the orders out for once, not you. If you disobey me, I will shoot you.’
Vinny’s heart was beating like a drum as he did as Roy ordered. He knew his brother had problems with him, but he had never imagined he hated him this much. ‘Please don’t do anything stupid, Roy. Think of Mum and Little Vinny. Both will be devastated if you kill me. I’m sorry that it was you who took that bullet, but it wasn’t my fault, it was all Preston’s doing,’ Vinny pleaded. Telling Roy that Lenny was dead and admitting that he had got revenge on Preston by getting his daughter up the duff was totally off limits now that his brother was pointing a gun his way. Either of those revelations might topple Roy over the edge.
Roy chuckled as he clocked Vinny’s hands shaking. ‘Not such a big man now, are you, bruv? And it’s not the bullet in the head that’s made me hate you so much. It’s the fact that you tried to ruin my engagement to the only woman I’ve ever loved. That was a truly despicable thing to do, you wicked bastard.’
Vinny stared at the gun and the tears began to roll down his cheeks. He had visions of never seeing his beloved mother and son again and that thought terrified him. ‘I’m so sorry, Roy, and you are right. Trying to split you and Colleen up was a truly despicable thing to do. But, I only did it because I loved you so much and was afraid of losing you. Me and you had always been inseparable ever since we were kids, and that all changed when Colleen came along. I was bang out of order, I know I was, but please don’t kill me. Who will look after Mum and Auntie Viv if I ain’t around, eh? Michael won’t. He’s too busy looking after that lunatic he married.’
Roy smiled on the one side of his mouth that he still could. He then lifted the gun up and pointed it towards his own head.
‘No, bruv. Stop it, please,’ Vinny whispered, his face a picture of shock.
‘I have explained everything in a letter to you, Vinny. There are also letters on my bed for the rest of the family, including Dad. My life is horrendous and I can’t live like this any more. Having your looks, your legs, and your dignity swiped from you in one fell swoop is something that no man should have to go through.’
‘Roy, don’t. Mum will never get over it if you do. Neither will I. Please don’t. I love you, bruv.�
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‘And I once loved you too, Vin, but not any more. Did you know that when you supposedly get to heaven any injuries or illnesses you might have had disappear? One of the other patients in here told me that, and I am hoping that if God accepts me at those pearly gates, I will regain the use of my legs and forgive you. Doubt we’ll ever meet again though, not with your track record, but if you take the advice I have given you in my letter, I hope we will. If you don’t, you will definitely end up in hell.’
‘No, Roy, noooo,’ Vinny screamed, as he saw his brother’s finger put pressure on the trigger.
A split second later, Roy was dead.
As the evening wore on, Queenie knew she had no choice other than to call the doctor out to her sister. There was no way Queenie would allow Vivian to be hospitalized, she needed her family around her, but Viv’s way of dealing with grief was like none Queenie had ever experienced.
‘Stop it, Viv. What you doing that for?’ Queenie asked, when her sister began ripping up the photos she had demanded Queenie give her of Lenny.
‘Because he’s fucking gone, ain’t he? Cunting God has taken him away from me,’ Vivian screamed.
‘Michael, get them off her. She is really gonna regret tearing them up when she feels better,’ Queenie urged.
‘Let me take them, Auntie Viv,’ Michael said, gently trying to coax the photographs out of his aunt’s firm grasp.
‘Noooo! Lenny was my son, so I can do what I bastard-well like with them,’ Vivian yelled.
‘It’s OK, Michael. The doctor’s here now. His car’s just pulled up. Go and answer the door,’ Queenie told her son.
‘Dad, we’re hungry,’ Daniel said, tugging on Michael’s sleeve.
‘Take your brothers upstairs and I’ll be up in a bit. Your Auntie Vivian isn’t well,’ Michael replied, opening the front door to let the doctor in.
‘But, we can’t go to bed yet. We haven’t had no dinner,’ Daniel complained.
‘When’s Mummy coming home?’ Adam asked innocently.
Michael ushered the doctor into the lounge, shut the door, then crouched down and hugged all three of his sons. ‘As soon as the doctor has gone, I’ll go round the chippy and get you some dinner, OK?’
‘OK. But, when is Mum coming home, Dad?’ Daniel asked.
Feeling as though his head was about to burst, Michael bit his lip to stop himself from breaking down. ‘Mummy will be home soon, and she told me today to tell you she loves and misses you all very much,’ he lied.
Vinny arrived back in Whitechapel at ten p.m. but instead of heading straight to his mother’s house, he went to the club first. He had told his doorman to put a note on the entrance saying that the club was closed until further notice, but he went in via the back just in case there were any punters milling around. After seeing his brother’s brains splattered up the walls, he couldn’t face anybody else at the moment.
Vinny poured himself a large Scotch. How he was going to tell his mother that Roy was now dead as well as Lenny, he did not know. Worried about saving his own skin, Vinny picked up the phone. ‘Hello. My best pal was admitted to your hospital last night after a bad car crash. His name is Ahmed Zane. Could you tell me how he is, please?’ he asked politely. Vinny had debated whether to put on a fake Turkish accent and say he was a relation, but he guessed Ahmed’s wife would be at the hospital, and he didn’t want to do or say anything suspicious in case the Old Bill were sniffing about.
‘I’m afraid I cannot give you any information over the phone unless you are a relative,’ the receptionist replied.
‘But I am his family. I was like a brother to him,’ Vinny informed the cold-hearted bitch.
‘I’m sorry, Sir, but it is hospital policy that we cannot divulge any information over the phone unless you are an actual relative of the patient.’
‘Well, fuck you, and fuck your stupid rules,’ Vinny yelled, before slamming the phone down.
Knowing he had to get to his mother’s house as quickly as possible to break the terrible news to her, Vinny stared at Roy’s letters. There were nine in total, addressed to Mum, Dad, Michael, Brenda, Auntie Viv, Champ, Colleen, Emily-Mae, and himself. Ripping his open, Vinny downed his Scotch before reading it. He was expecting the worst, but he couldn’t have been more surprised.
Dear Vinny,
Seeing as you are reading this letter means that I accomplished my task of blowing my brains out right in front of your very eyes, which is something I wanted to do. The reason being, I no longer have to suffer and seeing me die might actually be the wake-up call you need.
As I am writing this, I am thinking back to when we were kids. We were fuckers, weren’t we? We had to rob just to get by, and I can remember our opening night when we first bought the club as if it were yesterday. Mum and Auntie Viv were so proud of us, weren’t they? It really was an achievement for two East End ragamuffins who had come from nothing, wasn’t it? And do you remember how we managed to buy the club in the first place? We stalked that lorry driver for at least two weeks before we managed to get our hands on them televisions. They were good times, bruv, and ones I am chuckling about as I am writing this letter.
Right, now to the nitty-gritty. I could never deal with ending up as a cripple. I saw people smile pitifully at me in that wheelchair and even though I wanted to leap out the bastard thing and punch their faces in, I couldn’t. I was such a geezer years ago, just like you are and I found being different really hard to deal with. I couldn’t bear people to see me the way I was, and the bitter man I had become, so death will be a total relief to me.
Seeing as I have written you such a heartfelt letter, I need you to do a few things in return for me, bruv. I want you to stop doing those drugs, drinking so much, and get rid of Ahmed out of your life. I still hear lots through the grapevine, and I know what you’ve been up to. I also know that Ahmed is a heroin and cocaine dealer, and he will be your downfall, trust me.
I also want you to look after Mum, Auntie Viv, and Champ for me. Michael is strong enough to cope with my death, Brenda is self-centered, but Mum, Auntie Viv, and Champ will need you to be there for them. My last wish, is that you will make up with Dad. I spoke to him recently and he had really turned his life around. He isn’t a bad man, Vinny, he is our father.
Well, I must end this letter now, but I promise you faithfully, if you carry out all my wishes, I will always smile down on you from above. Heaven is meant to wipe away all the bad stuff, so hopefully I will be running about in no time again once I arrive. I might even open a nightclub up there!
Putting the letter on the bar, Vinny cried like he had never cried before.
Queenie was lying in bed cuddling her sister when she heard the front door open, then shut. Dr Baker had been the family GP for many years and, on Queenie’s insistence, he had given Vivian a strong injection to calm her down, which thankfully had worked wonders.
Little Vinny had rung up earlier to say he was staying at Ben Bloggs’ house. Daniel, Lee and Adam had all been tucked up in bed hours ago and, as far as Queenie knew, Michael was still downstairs.
Creeping out of bed so she didn’t wake Vivian, Queenie tip-toed down the stairs. As soon as she saw the look on Vinny’s face, she knew it was bad news. ‘Please tell me Roy is OK, Vinny?’ she pleaded, her eyes brimming with tears.
Hugging his mother, Vinny led her into the lounge. ‘Michael, pour us all a brandy, please,’ he ordered.
Michael wanted to tell his brother to fuck right off, but decided he could do that later, when his mum wasn’t present. She’d had enough upset in the last two days to last her a lifetime, and Michael could also tell by Vinny’s face that things hadn’t gone too well with Roy. ‘Well?’ Michael asked, handing round the brandies.
Vinny held his mother in his arms and looked deep into her eyes as he broke the terrible news. ‘Roy’s gone, Mum. He’d had enough of suffering and he wanted to go. I didn’t even have time to tell him about Champ. Roy’s mind was already made up.’
‘Gone! Gone! What do you mean he’s fucking gone?’ Queenie asked, her lips twitching with anxiety.
‘Roy’s dead, Mum. He shot himself. He wasn’t alone. I was there with him when he died. I tried to stop him, but he wasn’t having none of it. He was ready to go,’ Vinny explained, with tears running down his cheeks.
With her voice a mixture of hysteria and anger, Queenie flew at her son. ‘Why didn’t you grab the gun off him? You could have stopped him, why didn’t you try?’ she screamed, pummelling her fists against her eldest son’s chest.
‘It weren’t my fault, Mum, honest. Roy already had the gun in his hand when I got there. He even pointed it at me first,’ Vinny explained, trying to hug his distraught mother.
Queenie slapped Vinny hard around the face. ‘Get away from me. I don’t want you anywhere near me. This is all your fucking fault. I’ll never forgive you for this,’ she sobbed, before running out of the room, then up the stairs.
As Vinny mumbled something about a letter and went to chase after her, Michael grabbed him to stop him. ‘Well, I hope you are happy with yourself now, Vin. That’s two you’ve killed off.’
‘Michael, I know you hate me at the moment, and you have every right to, but please read the letter Roy left for me. He has left letters for the rest of the family as well,’ Vinny said, handing his own letter to his brother.
Michael sat down, read it, and to his surprise found he had tears in his eyes. ‘It still don’t make it right what happened to Champ, though, does it, Vin? And Roy hasn’t exactly forgiven you. He’s just asking you to change.’
‘Please, Michael, forgive me. I swear I’ll change.’
‘I don’t think you are capable of changing, Vin. You’ve got too much of an unpredictable nature and a nasty temper.’
Vinny knelt at his brother’s side and grabbed him by the head so he would have to look him in the eyes. ‘Michael, I loved Roy and Champ with all my heart. I did everything for them in life that I could. Johnny Preston misfiring was not my fault, neither was the van that came towards me with its full beam on. I swear, I had sobered up at that club, and I would never have driven Champ home if I didn’t think I was capable of doing so. I have taken in every word Roy said in that letter, and I swear I will abide by all his wishes. I have been drinking and snorting too much recently, but it was only since I met Ahmed. Roy was right. He is a bad influence on me. As for Dad, Roy is right about that too. I have treated him terribly, and at the end of the day, he is our father.’
Kimberley Chambers 3-Book Butler Collection Page 46