I’d been dreading this conversation. It had been bad enough to discuss it with my dad. Still, Tommy had to know sooner or later. “I did talk to her,” I said carefully.
“And?”
I’d reached the kitchen and sat at the table in the dark, trying not to imagine Tommy’s stricken expression. “She was wearing an engagement ring.”
“Say that again?”
I swallowed back tears. “She and Karl are getting married at the end of August.”
What followed were several loud bangs which made me think that Tommy was smashing the telephone receiver against the wall. When he came back on the line, his voice was ragged. “She’s marrying that bastard?”
“I don’t like it, either.”
His laugh was unhinged. “Well, guess what, Lilith, I hate it!”
My heart constricted. “Tommy, I’m so sorry.”
“I was planning on asking her to marry me. When I was stranded in Mumbai, I promised myself that I would do whatever it took to win her back.” He gave a laugh that was precariously close to a sob. “But I guess I’m too late.”
A long silence fell between us. In the background, there was more cheering and some clinking of glasses. Then Tommy said, “I will never forgive myself for how I hurt her.”
“Don’t say that! It was my fault.”
“Don’t worry, Lilith. I blame you, too.”
“Do you hate me?”
He didn’t reply.
“Can you ever forgive me?”
He laughed bitterly. “You’ll have to get in line. I’ll forgive you after I’ve forgiven myself.”
There was no way that I could let him go on thinking it was his fault. Even if he didn’t believe me, I needed to tell him the truth about who and what I was. “Tommy…”
“Sorry, Lil. I’m out of minutes.” The phone went dead.
“So now you’re reaping what you’ve been sowing?” Mr. Clerk stood in the middle of the kitchen. I could smell the booze on him from where I sat. He weaved, nearly fell over, and had to clutch the counter to keep himself steady. “Was that the man you slept with to win back your daughter?”
“Yes,” I admitted. I wondered how long he had been listening in. “But I never meant to hurt him.”
“You tempters never do.” Mr. Clerk made his unsteady way to the nearest bar stool and sat down. “All of you underestimate the pain you inflict on your victims.”
“You’re the angel, aren’t you?” I asked. “The one William seduced from Heaven into Hell.”
Mr. Clerk sighed. “Yes. William led me away from Heaven, just like he told you.”
I got up from my seat and took the bar stool next to his. “How did it happen? This thing between you and William?”
“This isn’t Housewives, Lilith,” Mr. Clerk said icily. “My drama is not there for your amusement.”
I touched his shoulder. “I just thought talking about it might make you feel better.”
“Do you have anything to drink?”
“Haven’t you had enough?”
“Not by half.” He disappeared through the otherworld doorway and returned a minute later with a bottle of brandy. I fetched a pair of glasses, and he poured us each a few fingers of the amber liquid. He immediately swallowed his drink and refilled the glass.
“Back when I was still an angel,” Mr. Clerk said, “I was given a particularly distasteful assignment. I was told to protect someone whom I found odious.” He drank more brandy. “This man I protected hated men like me. Men of my persuasion, you understand.”
Gay. I nodded.
Enough street light came in through the window that I could see Mr. Clerk’s face tighten. “I don’t know why I, of all angels, was asked to protect him, but I was.” He looked at me. “In Heaven, everything’s a lesson, you understand. You’re constantly urged to grow – in compassion, in understanding, in love. It can be tiresome. So I expect that I was supposed to learn something from this man. But the more I watched him, and the more I listened to his rhetoric and was forced to deal with his pettiness and shortcomings, the more I hated him. He was such a hypocrite, Lilith! He would denounce men like me while at the same time lusting over them. Eventually, I couldn’t deal with it any more.”
He poured himself a third drink. I had the feeling that he had forgotten I was in the room. “When William approached me, he was in full glamour mode. He was so irresistibly charming. So funny and flirtatious.” Mr. Clerk sighed. “So breathtakingly beautiful.”
I understood completely.
Mr. Clerk continued. “So I allowed William to slip past me and tempt the man. Somehow, that man’s petty act of evil rotted away what little morals he had. He stopped saying hateful things and started practicing them. Many young men suffered at his hands.” He finished his drink. “All because I looked the other way.”
“And when God found out…he sent you to Hell?”
Mr. Clerk laughed, startled. “No, of course not. He’s all about forgiveness, you see. He would have pardoned me in an instant if I’d asked him to. There’s no one He won’t let into Heaven.” His voice grew hard. “Even that wretch whom William tempted. After all the horror that man created, he repented on his deathbed, and was allowed inside. I couldn’t bear it. I also couldn’t bear myself for allowing it to happen. So I offered my services to Miss Spry, and she gladly accepted. At least she understands that the guilty must be made to pay.”
“I’m so sorry,” I said. I put my hand on his arm.
He shook it off. “Don’t be. I made my choices, Lilith, and I intend to stick by them.” He got up from the bar stool, nearly falling over when he stood.
“Are you all right?” I asked, worried. “You can sleep here tonight if you want.” I couldn’t bear the thought of him being alone in his sad little room.
“You have a big heart,” he said. “Like your mother.” He touched my cheek. “No wonder Helen hates you so much. No, I’ll be fine. After all, I have to get back to work.”
“I wish there was something I could do for you,” I said.
His eyes glittered. “There is. Tempt your client. I want Miss Spry winning this bet.”
“Why?” I asked. “What’s riding on this that is so important?”
“Me,” he said. “I’m the bet. If the other team wins, I’ll be forced to return to Heaven, and I do not want to go back there.”
“Whose idea was that?” I asked, startled.
“It doesn’t matter. Like I said, whenever the two of them make these kinds of wagers, they never put anything valuable on the table.”
“I promise to do my best,” I said. “Although, I’m sure that William will probably beat me to the win.”
“William,” he said bitterly. “William who?” He tried to smile, missing the true expression by a mile. Then he disappeared.
After Mr. Clerk left, I couldn’t sleep, so I lay down on the couch in front of the TV. I flipped through channel after channel, trying to distract myself from my thoughts, but that was impossible.
Mr. Clerk was right; I was reaping what I’d been sowing – grief, heartache, emptiness. Three things I deserved. Somehow, I’d let myself forget about the damage I’d done on my assignments. My new house, my pool, the monthly deposit into my bank account, even the string of successful temptations – all of it had blinded me to the fact that I was doing the Devil’s dirty work.
Remember, you’re doing this for Grace, I thought, but my conscience wouldn’t let it rest. I’d hardly given Grace a thought in the past few weeks. We’d grown so distant that she might as well have been living with her father. It was my bruised ego that wanted to win against William. My daughter’s freedom was just a perk.
While the TV blathered on, I closed my eyes and pictured all the lives that intersected with mine. If Mr. Clerk put every one of those transparencies on top of my life chart, he’d have a mess so complicated that even he wouldn’t be able to make sense of it.
A thought struck me, sending a jolt of electricity stra
ight into my brain. I sat up and turned off the TV, envisioning all those intersected lives. All those stacked transparencies.
Suddenly, I had a plan.
I wasn’t about to leave the girls alone a second time that night, especially since I didn’t know how long I’d be gone. I checked the clock. It was eleven-thirty, far too late to ask Kate to watch the girls. Even though Mr. Clerk had said that Miss Spry was contractually obligated to look over Grace while I was away, I wasn’t about to trust my demon overlord to babysit. Besides, the contract didn’t say anything about keeping Ariel safe. No, I needed a human.
I sent Jasmine an urgent text message: 9-1-1!! CALL ME!
I hoped that the added drama of the exclamation points and shouty caps would break through her wall of silence and make her call me back. Luckily, they did.
“Can you watch the girls tonight?” I asked her when she called.
“Tonight? Like right now?” From the sound of the background noise, she was at a club.
“Yes. I need to take Kate to the hospital. She fell and thinks she broke her wrist.” Then I had a thought. “Karl isn’t with you, is he?”
“What do you care?” she asked.
Okay, so he was there. I prayed that he wouldn’t want to leave the club to babysit a couple of kids. “I don’t care,” I said. “I was curious, that’s all.” Then I remembered that Tommy was coming over to shower in the morning. If I was lucky, Jas would spend the night at my house and then see him when he arrived. If nothing else, they could talk. “Please, Jas, I really need you.”
After a long pause, she said, “Fine, but I’m only doing this for Kate and the girls.”
“I understand,” I said.
After we hung up, I waited anxiously until her car pulled into the driveway. The minute she walked into the house, I said, “I’ve got to go right now! Call me if you need anything.” I got into my car and parked down the street far enough so she couldn’t see me. Then I found an otherworld passage and went to talk to Mr. Clerk about Craig.
Hopefully, for the very last time.
Mr. Clerk’s office was a mess. Crumpled papers were scattered everywhere, and nearly a dozen charts covered in sticky notes had been tacked to the walls. Piles of books lay on the drafting table. The pencil sharpener had been emptied on the floor and shavings had been tracked from one end of the room to the other.
Mr. Clerk, still reeking of booze, had passed out at his desk with his head pillowed on his folded arms. He jumped when I touched his shoulder.
“I’m sorry to bother you,” I said, “but this is important.”
He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “It certainly better be.”
“I know what we need to do about Craig.”
His frown deepened. “You’re not telling me how to do my job again, are you?”
“Just listen.” I brushed away scraps of paper that had collected on Craig’s blueprint. “Do I have a transparency?”
“Everyone does,” he said. “Even me.”
“Okay. Go get mine and put it on top of Craig’s.”
Mr. Clerk opened his mouth to protest, but as he thought about my suggestion, his face changed and he smiled. Without a word, he hustled to the cabinet, and returned with a large scroll of clear plastic that he spread over the top of Craig’s chart.
“Well?” I impatiently bounced on the balls of my feet.
Mr. Clerk traced one line after another, muttering to himself. “No. No. Nothing. Wait…” He used the magnifying glass to look at a section of the chart. “Oh, Lilith!”
“You found something? What is it?” I crowded next to him, trying to see for myself. “Is there a connection?”
“Yes.” He put the magnifying glass down, closed his eyes, and massaged his temples. “But…”
“But what?”
“I feel obligated to warn you that this assignment could be dangerous.” His startlingly blue eyes bored into mine.
“Because of William? Is that it?”
“No. Because of the unpredictability of human beings.”
I considered this, but for only a moment. I needed to win if I wanted Grace free from the curse. “I don’t care. Tell me.”
He pressed his lips together as if once more weighing the alternatives. Then he said, “This job is for tonight. You need to meet your client in the parking lot of the bar and convince him to do what J.T. says.”
I waited a few heartbeats. “And then?”
“And then you run like hell.”
Chapter Sixteen
I heard Craig and J.T. arguing even before I stepped from the otherworld into the human one. Both of them were angry. And drunk.
I twisted my body into the familiar pixie shape, then took a deep breath, wiped my sweating palms on my jeans, and got ready to do my job. Before I could step through, however, someone grabbed my shoulder. William.
I tore out of his grip and whirled to face him. “Don’t you dare get in my way!” My inner demon surged, ready to break free. I didn’t think I had the strength to beat William in a fair fight, but I wouldn’t fight fair. “You are not going to stop me.”
His expression was equally determined, but he wasn’t looking at me. He was looking out the otherworld doorway at the parking lot of The Dirty Duck. “I’m not here to stop you. I’m here to stop her.”
“What?” I looked over my shoulder and saw a gleam of heavenly energy as Harmony emerged from her own doorway.
Shit.
“I’ll hold her off as long as I can,” William said, “but you better work fast.”
My mind reeled. Was he saying what I thought he was? “What about the competition?”
“It’s over. I’m conceding.”
This had to be another dirty trick. “I don’t believe it.”
“I don’t blame you,” he said, “but it’s true.”
Dirty trick or not, I couldn’t waste time puzzling it out now. I had to act.
“Wait!” he said before I left. “One last thing.” He leaned down and kissed me. It was only a quick brush across the lips, yet it felt different from every other kiss we’d shared. He wasn’t the arrogant, seductive incubus, but the fully-human William. The one I’d been longing for. Kissing him left me breathless.
“That’s for luck,” he said. “Now get moving.”
“So you’re going to wimp out on me again,” J.T. said. He slammed his hand down on the hood of Craig’s Jeep. “What is wrong with you?”
Craig and J.T. stood at the back of The Dirty Duck, far away from the other vehicles. It was drizzling here in Orland, and in the jaundiced light of the sodium lamps, both men looked sickly.
“Would you listen to yourself?” Craig said. “You’re not thinking straight.”
“You’re either in with me, or you’re not.” J.T. pushed Craig in the chest, and when Craig stumbled backwards a few steps, J.T. pushed him again even harder. “So which is it?” He continued to bear down on his friend until eventually, he had Craig pressed up against the dumpster. He feinted a punch, making Craig flinch and put up his arms in defense. “All or nothing,” J.T. said. “That’s what it is.”
“I don’t want trouble,” Craig argued. He sounded much younger than he usually did. His wall of hostility was gone. “Let’s go back inside and talk about this, okay?”
“No, not okay. We’ve talked and talked, and now it’s time to do something.”
That was my cue. I could feel Craig teetering on the brink of his decision. To my relief, William had done his job. Neither he nor Harmony were in sight. My path was clear. All I had to do was push Craig a little to tip him in the right direction. I stepped from the shadows and into the soft, yellow light.
J.T. glared at me. “What are you doing here?”
Craig lowered his arms. “When’s that story of yours going into the paper?”
My instinct was to say I’d already turned it in, but my demon had another plan. Although I wasn’t convinced that this was the right approach, I decided to trust her.
I said, “It’s not. I’m killing the story.”
“What?” Craig was furious. “Are you kidding me?”
“I can’t put my name on a thing like that,” I said. “I have a reputation as a serious journalist.”
I glanced at J.T. to see how he was taking this. He stood as still as stone, his arms folded over his chest. “So you are a journalist,” he said. “Because you aren’t listed at the Free Press.”
“That’s because I work for The Detroit News.”
J.T. blinked, confused.
“And the whole militia thing you two have going,” I continued, “it’s crazy. There isn’t going to be any apocalypse. You’re just two little boys playing around with guns.” I wasn’t sure if the reverse psychology was working, but my demon seemed to think it was. “Do you honestly think that rational people are going to believe that they should buy gas masks and learn how to make rabbit snares in case of a bio-emergency?” I loaded my voice with contempt. “That’s a load of crap made up by a bunch of ignorant, paranoid morons.”
Craig clenched and unclenched his fists. He glanced at J.T., then back at me. I could almost see the wheels of his mind spinning like dynamos as he considered his options. Finally, he nodded. “J.T., I think you’re right. I think we need to step this up.”
In that moment, I knew I’d won. I could see it in Craig’s eyes. Whatever he had decided would send him on a path that led right to Miss Spry’s office. I’d done my job. I’d finally won the bet.
I’d hardly finished congratulating myself before J.T. grabbed my arms from behind. Craig threw his sweatshirt over my head, stuffing one of the sleeves so deep into my mouth that I started to gag. Before I could fight back, one of them hit me across the face. Stars danced in front of my eyes.
Because I’d been in such a hurry to complete my assignment, I hadn’t taken the usual care in my appearance and was wearing my own clothes which were much too big for my pixie-sized self. I was a little stronger than a human woman, but I was also blinded and clumsy. I threw one of them aside then tripped over my too-long jeans and fell to the ground, painfully hitting my nose. Blood gushed over my upper lip. Someone grabbed my shirt and hauled me to my feet. When I struggled to get away, he hit me again across the back of the skull with something hard and heavy.
Straight to Heaven Page 18