by Lauren Wood
Puzzled, I responded in between sobs, “What have I done again?”
“You have killed another one of our parents. Well done.” He said in a poisonous tone. “Death truly surrounds you sister.” I began to cry even harder. I felt a pain in my heart that could only be described as emptiness.
“Brother!” I pleaded. The sound of my voice scared me. It sounded hollow and desperate. “There was this black beast, it came out of nowhere!”
“Don’t bother wasting your words, I will not listen. I have already arranged your punishment. You got away with killing our mother, the queen. I will not let you get away with killing our father as well.”
At this point I wanted to fall into myself and leave this world. I had no one.
“I have arranged your wedding to Kit Bataran. It will take place after I am sworn in as king.” Brother stood up and looked down at me in the bed. “You are a disgrace to our family and I will not see you again. Consider yourself forever banished from Darden.” And just like that he stormed out of the room slamming the door behind him. I jumped at the sound.
Kit Bataran was the eldest son of King Laurence Bataran of Soundsforth. For my entire life I had been told stories about the Bataran’s. Brother had always told me horrors of what terrible people they were. I didn’t know enough about him and I was in no way interested in being married to him, or anyone for that matter. Darden had been my home for the past eighteen years. I wasn’t ready to leave. I stayed in my bed for days until my tears dried up, only getting up to say my goodbyes to father.
The funeral felt short for someone who had led such a significant life. The entire town showed up to pay their respects to the fallen King Erroll Nord. The only townsfolk who wasn’t there was Toil Germaine. The way he continued to mutter his apologies caused me to believe that he had planned the attack on my father. Something didn’t fit properly. My heart burned with hatred for that man. He let this happen, I know it.
The tree shook again and more raindrops fell upon my face. It was quiet, I was the only person remaining at the burial site. The rest of the town was at the castle for the royal crowning of their new king, Montgomery Nord.
I looked down at my hands and placed them gently on my lap to smooth out my black cloak. When I noticed the white lace of my wedding gown peeking out around my ankles, I scrambled to tuck it in. Brother had insisted I wear it under my cloak to the funeral seeing as I was to be married hours later.
When I was sure that Brother’s crowning ceremony was over I picked myself up off of the ground and blew father a kiss. “Father, I miss you in my heart and I will never forget you. I promise to keep your soul alive.” I placed a single white rose upon his headstone and pulled myself away. The wind picked up and howled against my back pushing me up the hill. Forcing me not to turn back.
The ceremony was small which I was completely grateful for. It was held just outside of Darden in the hills of Soundsforth. The only people attending were King Laurence and his queen Elmire. Brother showed up for the appearance to ensure that I was following through with my punishment. He left shortly after the ceremony began. It was quite strange for a royal wedding to be so small but my heart screamed out in joy.
Kit was quite handsome in his royal cloak. He had a very kind but concerned face. The way his hair curled and framed his face softened his appearance. He stood six foot five inches towering a foot above my petit frame. He clasped my hand in his which I found quite bizarre considering the circumstances. This man was a complete stranger to me.
The ceremony droned on and I only half listened. I paid close attention to cross my fingers behind my back as I recited my marital vows to Kit Bataran. The only vow I took today was to myself. I vowed to keep my heart guarded. I may be forced to marry this man but I would never love him. Everyone I have ever loved has been taken from me. It was better this way.
“You may now kiss the princess.”
Kit smiled at my coyly, nervously. Gently, he placed one hand along my cheek and bowed his head down placing his warm lips carefully on mine. This was my first kiss, all of the blood in my body rushed up into my cheeks. I hoped I was doing this right. I felt his other hand brush the small of my back and against my hand which was still fingers-crossed behind my back. Embarrassed, I pulled my hands together. Then it ended just as quickly as it had started.
“I promise I am going to love you.” Kit whispered in the kindest voice. I felt my stomach flutter and my mind began to fog.
Snap out of it Mira, guard your heart.
As a family, we walked toward the royal carriage where the guards and horses were awaiting us. King Laurence and Queen Elmire lead the way while Kit and I followed closely behind. Just as he had before, Kit clasped my hand in his.
Once we reached the carriage and the king and queen had entered, Kit asked to talk to me on the side. I felt a wave of nerves come over me but politely agreed.
“Mira, my lady.” He cleared his throat. He was so handsome. “I just wanted to personally express my condolences on the loss of your father. King Erroll was a great man. We thought very highly of him even in Soundsforth. I understand that it has been an excruciatingly difficult day for you and I will respect your space. Please, if there is anything myself or the kingdom of Soundsforth can do for you, do not hesitate to ask. We are you home now.”
I couldn’t help myself, I threw my arms around his neck and burst into tears. His kindness burned right through me and I so badly needed someone to care for me. Reminding myself to keep my heart guarded, I pulled away carefully from his embrace. “Thank you my prince. We can go home now.” The words tasted funny in my mouth. I had never referred to anywhere but Darden as ‘home.’ Now here I was, headed in the wrong direction and already calling it home.
When we arrived in Soundsforth hours later, the townsfolk were there to greet us. They cheered as we entered the gates. Everyone was trying to get a glimpse of Soundsforth’s newest princess. I cowered into Kit not wanting to be seen. My mind continued to soar back to Darden. I wondered what they were doing and if anyone missed me. I knew I was certainly missing them. Head forward and heart hidden, I trudged onward into my new life as Princess Mira Bataran of Soundsforth.
Kit was extremely accommodating when we arrived at the castle. The handmaids had already prepared a separate room to help me adjust. A wave of relief washed over me as I realized I was not expected to share a bed with a complete stranger. They helped me undress and change into something other than my funeral cloak and frilly wedding dress. After bathing I sat on the edge of my bed and peered out of the window. The moon was full and the stars bright. I hoped that father was up there looking into this window right now. I hope he could see how brave I was being. I hope he knew I missed him.
Breaking my trance, I heard a quiet tap on the door. “Who is it?” I choked out.
“Mira,” I heard in a small voice “it’s me, Kit. May I please come in?”
My heart immediately began to pound and my hands started to sweat. All of the nerves in my body were on guard and prickling me. I couldn’t say no, could I? “Kit. Yes, you may come in.”
Quietly he pushed into the door being sure not to make a sound when closing it behind himself. Exaggeratedly he tip-toed his way across the room and sat across from me on the edge of the bed. We sat there in silence for quite a while simply staring into each other’s eyes. His were round and the color of azure. The light from the moon bounced off of his brilliant eyes and they sparkled as they looked into mine. “I was telling the truth when I promised I would love you.” He managed to break our silence.
I smiled shyly but said nothing in return.
“Mira, we are going to have a beautiful life together but only when you are ready. I will be here when you need me and until then I am granting you space and comfort.” He stood and stepped over to face me. With one hand on either side of me he bent in close. “I promise I am going to love you.” He repeated and placed a gentle kiss on my cheek before leaving the room.
My mind was spinning when I heard the door click closed. So badly my heart was crying out to follow him but my mind continued to intervene. Mira, guard your heart. If I was to fall in love with him, something terrible would happen to him. As loud as my mind was screaming over the cries of my heart, it wasn’t loud enough.
In the dark I fumbled my way across the hall in search of Kit’s room. At this point I was sure he had to have been asleep as it had been hours since he had visited me. When I finally reached his room, I could still see the flicker of candle light around the edges of his closed door. I inhaled deeply before rapping on the door. Not even a second had passed and I turned to go back, he had to have been asleep.
Suddenly, the door propped open. “Mira?” I heard Kit’s whispers. “Mira, is that you out there?”
My feet took off running toward him and I barreled into him arms. Frantically I sobbed and told him all about how alone I felt. “Father was my best friend. He was the only person who loved me just as much as I loved him. Brother had never been kind to me, he almost seemed relieved to hear that Father was gone.” I spilled my entire story about how I killed my mother when I was born to helplessly watching my father get attacked by a savage animal. It felt all too easy to fall into his arms and to confess it all. I didn’t hold back and he sat there and listened. The entire time stroking my hair and kissing my cheeks.
I had never felt comfort like this. I have never felt this kind of safety with anyone. He held me tightly and let me cry into his chest. Eventually I felt as though I had no more reason to cry. Everything that had been bottling up inside of me for so long had been released. I no longer felt as though I needed bigger shoulders now that I knew the release of honesty and finding someone who cared.
“Kit,” I looked up at him “I think I promise to love you too.” I could feel my heart racing in my chest. It was pounding so hard it must have thrown its guard down because before I knew it I was kissing him and all of the pain had stopped.
He held my face in his hands and kissed me with so much passion I could feel it in my toes. I pulled him close to me and ran my hands down his back. His breath on my neck felt electric and I could barely it. One by one, I unbuttoned his shirt eager to feel the warm skin beneath it. His chest was strong I could see each muscle tense as he picked me up and carried me across the room. This was paradise.
Carefully he laid me down across the bed and continued kissing me. My mind felt intoxicated and my heart was jarred with lust. So badly I wanted to feel his skin against mine. I started grabbing for my nightgown and he slowed himself down.
“Mira, if you’re not ready I can wait.” He gently kissed my forehead.
“I’m ready.” I was so ready to love this man I could hardly stand it. I stood up and slipped out of my nightgown. In the middle of the room I stood, vulnerable. The light of the night sky cascaded alongside of my body casting a mysterious silhouette on the wall. I stepped forward toward Kit. He was laying on his side on the bed, propped up by his elbow. His eyes scanned me as I moved forward. With one arm he reached out and wrapped it around my small waist. Tenderly he kissed my breasts stirring so many emotions and desires in my heart.
I laid myself against Kit. My skin thrilled under the influence of his. With each touch I pulled myself closer to him. We moved into each other and my breath fell heavy. Every nerve in my body ached with desire. All of the past seemed to melt away and he was the only thing contained in my consciousness.
Together we reached the top and I collapsed beside him. Resting my head on his chest I followed his breath and listened to his heart throb. Every feeling in my body was so alien but yet so freeing. We lay there in a close embrace for what felt like hours sharing playful kisses and laughing. Just as I began to fall into sleep I heard Kit’s soft voice “Mira, I promise to love you.” We fell asleep with smiles on our faces.
The sun beamed through the window blinding me. I could feel Kit stirring beside me. I immediately felt as though I should panic and run back to my room but this was my husband. This was the man I was to share my life with so who was to care that I had spent the night with him. The thought reassured me and I reached over to kiss him.
Once we had dressed and prepared for the day ahead, we made our way into the dining hall for our breakfast with the king and the queen. Laurence and Elmire greeted us with the warmest hugs.
“It brings great joy to see our Kit so happy, Mira. We have dreamt of Kit’s wedding day since he was a young boy. Always so easy and carefree. As his mother, I know he will dedicate his being to making you happy.” Elmire reached up to brush her son’s cheek. “To see him marry such a bright young lady makes me a very proud mother. Mira, if you are anything like your father, Soundsforth with be lucky to have the two of you ruling it someday.”
“That just about sums up everything I wanted to say.” Laurence chuckled. “My queen is never shy of words. Welcome to our family princess Mira!” he cheered. “Now let us eat.”
During breakfast I learned so much about the Bataran family. Each king thus far had lived a long prosperous life. The townsfolk were always considered family and were welcome at the castle any time. Their values reminded me so much of father’s. It seemed that everything Brother had told me had been complete deception. My heart fired at the thought of him.
I wondered how Darden was doing under the rein of their new King Montgomery. I hoped he kept father’s spirit alive and spread as much love as King Erroll had. Deep down, I dreaded it very much. My heart feared for the people of Darden.
In the weeks that followed I was able to explore Soundsforth with Kit by my side. He introduced me to the street merchants and school children. One by one he knocked on the doors as women did their washing to introduce his bride. With each passing day I felt more like a princess than I ever had. Kit showed me off as though I was a trophy, I was something he was proud of and if felt astonishing. He treated me kindly and always ensured I was taken care of.
Truly, we were the happiest pair. There wasn’t a day that Kit wasn’t beaming with joy. I thought I could never see him happier until the day that my bed nurse announced to him that I was pregnant. He screamed with pride and twirled me into the air. “We are going to have a child!” he proclaimed. “Mira, my beautiful lady. You are going to have my child. I promise to love you always.” He wrapped his arms around me lovingly. “Thank you nurse!”
The news of our pregnancy rolled through Soundsforth faster than I could have ever imagined. The entire town buzzed with excitement for the new baby prince or princess. I hadn’t realized just how far it had spread until one morning I received a letter from my brother. It read:
My dearest sister,
News has reached Darden that you are with child. I presume congratulations are in order. It pains me to hear such news through the chattering of Darden townsfolk. I am your brother and I wish to hear such news from the direct source. Be sure to write me if anything noteworthy should happen. I care to be the first to know.
I have spent the past month cleaning up the mess that Father has left behind. I know you believe that Father was a great king but he was absolutely wretched. His carelessness and gaiety has caused me much grief since I have been appointed King.
There is something very important that you need to be aware of. As I expect this letter to be monitored by Soundsforth authorities I will simply say this: Follow his strides by the light of the new moon. A new man you will find.
Dare not say that I did not tell you. Sister, you have been warned.
Signed,
King Montgomery Nord
My heart sank and confusion set in. What was he talking about ‘a new man you will find?’ For days I read over his letter in private trying to understand the meaning. Surely he couldn’t be talking about Kit? I spent every night in Kit’s arms. With the new moon approaching I became wearier. What kind of warning was brother sending me?
On the night of the new moon I lay still in our bed however could not contain any rest as my mind was raci
ng. Just as I started to fall into sleep, I felt Kit stirring beside me. He got to his feet and quietly left the room.
At this point I could hear my heart in my ears. I waited until his footsteps disappeared down the hall. Without hesitation I sprung up out of bed and changed into my clothes. Without any light, I stumbled my way down the corridor. Kit was nowhere within sight or sound. He must have left the castle.
I made my way to the back gates where no one would see me escape into the night. From the light of the moon I could see Kit’s silhouette in the far off distance. I made sure to stay back so that he could not hear or see me. He seemed to be headed in a specific direction, straight to the tree line.
The forests in Soundsforth were nothing like they were in Darden. They were heavy and dark. You could hear the moaning of the souls that had been trapped in the trees unlike Darden where birds whispered in your ear and the trees sang into the breeze. He was headed deeper and deeper into the forest. With each step forward I could feel the baby kicking me. Maybe it was a sign that I needed to stop and go back. I needed to know where he was going.
Brother and I had never really seen eye to eye. Maybe this was his way of reaching out to me to show me that he still cared. Even with that thought, I was terrified for what I might find when I caught up with Kit. The darkest part of night was falling and the baby kicked harder than ever before inside of me.
Just when I was ready to turn around, the trees parted into a clearing. I remained at the edge of the trees so that Kit wouldn’t see me. I searched the clearing but he was nowhere in sight. As I turned to leave I heard a branch snap just a few feet away from me. I froze, it was Kit.
He was staring into the darkness with the moon directly at his back. Then something strange started happening. The wind stopped. The night fell completely still. Kit’s body began to shake, slowly at first but became exaggeratedly more vicious with each passing moment. Something seemed to be possessing his body. I couldn’t hide anymore and watch him. I screamed out but quickly covered my mouth with both of my hands.