“Wow.” She wasn’t sure what else to say.
To her, going to a sex club had been so out of the box. Something that had never even entered her conscious, and now she finds out that both Cassidy and Aiden had gone. Her mind was teetering on overload.
“I know, it was crazy. I kinda want to go back, but I’m not sure Aiden does.” She laughed.
“I want to go back,” Destiny confessed.
But she only wanted to go back with Ronan.
“I’m assuming this is Ronan you went with?”
Destiny wasn’t entirely surprised she knew. It would make sense Aiden would have told her. She nodded. She’d been dying to have this conversation with someone, but as Aiden was arguably her closest friend right now, and Ronan was still a touchy subject at best, she’d been keeping it all inside. Now she was about ready to bust.
“Did he put you on that cross thingy?” Cassidy’s eyes lit up.
“No. This wasn’t that type of place. It was more, well it was a house first of all, and there were a bunch of rooms… Honestly, I didn’t see that much of it. Ronan and I played a scene on a veranda, that was about it. Although I did meet another man there who was…he was interesting.”
Christian De La Vega was more than just interesting. He was charming and charismatic, but for whatever reason, Ronan seriously didn’t like him, and she hadn’t felt last night was the time or place to push him for more information.
“What kind of scene?” Cassidy was practically drooling.
Destiny felt heat creep up her neck, and she looked away. She wanted to tell her, she needed to tell someone, but it felt so awkward.
“We had sex, sort of…” She chewed her lower lip considering how much detail to give her. “Ronan had these other men fuck me while he watched, then I…well I…”
She had to consciously take a deep breath.
“I gave him oral, and there were a bunch of other people around watching and…oh my god I cannot believe I did that!”
She was smiling, though, even today, the morning after. She honestly had no regrets. It had been the most intriguing and fascinating and satisfying experience she ever had, and it was with Ronan. She’d never regret anything she did with him.
“Wow! Oh my god that is…” Cassidy placed her hand over her mouth.
“Too much?” Destiny cringed.
“No…I mean if you’re comfortable sharing, I’m good with listening. Aiden and I had a threesome once.” She beamed.
Destiny giggled like a silly teenager.
“Oh my God!”
“I know.” Cassidy smiled as if she were waiting to be crowned Miss America.
“Why do you think it is that sex seems so complicated?” Destiny flopped back in her chair. “I mean, I was raised to be a good girl, don’t get me wrong, this is so out of the box for me, but good God, Cas, I loved it!”
“I know. When I met Aiden, I hadn’t had sex in more years than I’d like to admit.”
“Me, too!” Destiny’s cheeks blazed with heat. “I mean with Ronan! Not Aiden…oh my God.” She covered her face with her hands, but Cassidy only laughed.
“I sort of figured that’s what you meant, Destiny.”
“I’m so embarrassed.” She shook her head.
“You just told me you were gang fucked in public, Destiny, and the confusion on Aiden embarrasses you?” Cassidy laughed more. “You’re right, sex is complicated, and we’re so hung up on it in our culture. I’ve traveled through Europe a lot since Aiden and I got together. There are so many places there where sexuality is simply embraced as part of the human experience. It’s beautiful. Aiden and I once went to a bathhouse in France where—” She blushed furiously. “It was nearly an orgy. It was so awesome.”
They both broke into another bout of laughter. It was beyond fantastic to be able to share like this with someone. Destiny didn’t realize how much she had needed it. She pushed a little further.
“Ronan is a Dom.” She stayed quiet waiting to see if that was the thing that would push things into too weird territory.
“I have a good friend who’s a sub! Her name’s Anne. You’d love her! Oh my God I should call her and have her and…well, ah…her Dom, come visit!”
That was the second time she’d gotten weird like that. As if there were some information she simply wasn’t permitted to share. It made her curious to know who and why, but she let it go. Whoever Anne’s Dom was couldn’t matter anyway, but she did like the idea of getting to meet another sub.
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be all cloak and dagger, it’s just her Dom, he’s in the public eye so their privacy… it’s delicate and I’m not overly good at keeping my mouth shut all the time.” She laughed.
“It’s okay, no worries, I’d love to meet her, though. Honestly, Cassidy, this is all so confusing for me. I’ve never thought of myself as anything other than a good little girl who lays still on a Saturday night and lets hubby have his way… Okay, not quite that bad, but close! Then I meet Ronan, and he brings out this whole other side of me, and I love it.”
“And Ronan is definitely yummy!” She looked over her shoulder quickly then back to Destiny. “And if you ever breathe a word of that to Aiden, you know I’m throwing you under the bus on that one!”
She laughed, and Destiny joined her. She had never in her life shared such an easy connection with another woman. This was what she’d always hoped for with her sister, but never happened.
“This is so nice, Cassidy. Unexpected, but really nice. Thanks.”
Cassidy smiled and shrugged.
“I’m loving this, too. I don’t really know anyone here after all. If I’m honest, I’ve been sort of lonely and at loose ends.”
Destiny suddenly felt awful for not including her sooner. It was just so awkward with the whole Aiden thing.
“Hell, if I had known we’d get along so well, I’d have thrown Aiden over for you first day!”
More giggling erupted.
“I need to go see Ronan. I think I hurt him before. I just got so scared of how deeply I feel for him, and I know he’s leaving, I just…”
“You’re afraid of having your heart broken.” Cassidy gave her a soft smile that said she truly understood.
“Yeah.” There didn’t seem to be much more to say on that.
“Well go see him then. We can work out the report when you’re done. It’s not like I don’t have plenty to keep me busy…although…”
Something sparked in her eyes, and Destiny recognized it immediately. They both started laughing again.
“I’ll go find Ronan. You go find Aiden. We’ll reconvene later, much happier and sated women!”
“Oh my God, we’re terrible!”
They both stood, still laughing.
“I know, it’s kinda awesome!” Destiny hugged Cassidy, knowing the relationship between them had just shifted into something unexpected and wonderful, and she always loved it when that happened.
She left the office, nerves a bit rattled. She’d been so short with Ronan earlier, and he hadn’t deserved that. She needed to make this right with him. She’d gone into this affair with her eyes open. It wasn’t his fault her feelings were changing, and she would never ask him for more than he already told her he could give. She’d be a big girl and deal with her heart when he left, but in the meantime, she intended to enjoy every decadent moment he’d give her!
It didn’t take long to find him. He was on the ground floor of the one building they hadn’t opened for guests yet, and he had his shirt off and a sliding glass door in his hands as she walked up. The place was deserted of guests, of course, but there were about twenty of his men all working on one thing or another and the sound of power tools would make it very difficult to have this conversation.
“Ronan?” She waited.
She watched him swing the glass door around and lean it against the exterior wall of a room.
“Yeah, Des, what is it?” He was so cold it hurt her some. After the intimacy
they shared the night before, she wasn’t sure she could go on hiding what she felt for him or what he meant to her. She was the one that had made the rules though, so it wasn’t fair to whine about them now.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?” She waited, feeling rather conspicuous.
He sighed. “Just a sec.”
She waited while he talked with three of his men then he walked over to her. He placed his hand at her elbow and guided her around the corner and out of view from the activity going on in the interior courtyard.
“What’s wrong?” He seemed tense, and she began to reconsider this conversation entirely.
“This is a bad time. I’m not sure what I was thinking.” She tried to pull away only to have him reach out, push his hand into her hair and hold her captive.
“Is this about last night?” His tone was firm and lacking of any tenderness.
“No…not really.”
He released her. “Look, Des, this is just supposed to be fun, right? If it isn’t any fun for you anymore, no hard feelings.”
She was crushed.
“Are you…” Breaking up with her wasn’t the right turn of phrase, but she couldn’t think of any other way of putting it.
“You don’t want to see me anymore? Did I do something wrong last night?” She hated the needy edge her tone took on.
“Des, I already told you how pleased I was with you, but this kind of thing’s not for everybody. If you want out, you’re out.” He shrugged.
She stood there staring at him in disbelief.
“And you could walk away just like that, no big deal?” She didn’t want the answer, but she needed to hear it nonetheless.
“Sweetheart, I told you, I fuck ‘em and leave ‘em. If you aren’t having fun anymore, then it’s run its course. No big deal.”
She couldn’t breathe for a moment, but she refused to let him see how much pain he was causing her.
“Yeah.” She was dizzy. “It was more than…I mean now that I’ve had time to think about it.”
Her heart was shredding as she stood there agreeing with him while every piece of her wanted to tell him the truth, that it wasn’t too much, that it had been the night of her life and if she lay in his arms every night for the rest of her life, she’d consider herself the most blessed woman in the universe.
He reached forward and kissed her cheek. “Des, it’s fine. I’m a big boy. We had fun.”
“Uh-huh.”
She stood there staring at him in complete disconnect. How had this happened?
“Look, I’ve gotta run. We have a big day of installs.” He started to back away from her.
“Right.” She was reduced to one-word answers in fear that if she tried anything more, she’d either burst into tears or beg him not to leave her, and neither was acceptable.
“Destiny, seriously, no big deal. Okay?” He sounded reassuring.
“Sure.”
He turned and walked back toward the construction, leaving her there reeling. She couldn’t feel her feet, didn’t think her legs worked anymore, and the pain rising up from the deepest parts of her was more than she could bear.
She wanted to fall on the ground and wail in agony, but she couldn’t. She had to get out of there, but she couldn’t go back to her suite. One of the boys may be there. There was no place.
She started to move, simply away, no intention of where to go or what to do. She only knew that she had to get someplace alone, crumple to the floor and cry until her soul was empty.
Chapter Eighteen
Ronan threw back another boilermaker and wondered how he had fucked over his entire world so spectacularly.
“Give me another.”
Karissa put her elbow on the bar and leaned her cheek into her palm.
“Ronan, I don’t know you, but I am a good bartender, and you’re startin’ to look a little green.”
“Don’t make me disrespect a lady, darlin’, just give me another drink.”
He was in no mood for pleasantries and was thankful when she walked away without arguing with him. He couldn’t take his eyes off Destiny standing across the lobby. She wore a basic black dress with a plunging back, sleeveless and accentuated with hits of green in the belt and shoes. Her hair was up as always, and he had an enormous craving to go dishevel it. Although he had to think her horse’s ass ex would disapprove. Although with the way Oscar had been hanging on Destiny all week, riling him up was the least Ronan wanted to dish out.
Even from across the room, he could read her body like he was playing her beneath his finger. Her subtle cues rang loud and clear, and he didn’t like how relaxed her body seemed tonight in Oscar’s presence. When her mother and her ex showed up at the hotel originally, she was tense, upset. He was pretty certain she’d been crying the one time he’d found a lame excuse to make contact with her. She hadn’t reached out to him, though, and that was the thing that was killing him tonight.
“Come on, I’m taking you back to your room.” Aiden tried to grab his arm, but Ronan slid out of his hold at the last second.
“Son of a bitch. Who made you my daddy?” Ronan moved down two seats.
“Ronan, she doesn’t need you making a scene. We’ve got too many guests in here tonight.”
It was true. Over the summer her resort had really come together. Probably better than she had even dared to dream, and he was so damn proud of her.
“I’m not making a scene. You are!” He looked around for Karissa, who he was assuming at this point was the one who’d ratted him out, but the coward was nowhere to be found.
“Fine. No scene. Let’s just talk.”
Aiden took a seat in the barstool beside him. There was a small group of college-aged kids playing pool, and six or seven other tables filled with guests, and about half the spots at the bar itself were full as well. There was a woman sitting at the piano in the foyer playing some god-awful piece of classical music, and a line of about thirty people waiting to check in. His heart swelled with pride for all her hard work. The place was a far cry from where it had been that first day he walked in and found it a graveyard.
“You and I both know there ain’t nothin’ to talk about, unless it’s how to make Karissa give me another boilermaker!”
She poked her head out from the back room, and he growled at her.
She flipped him off and went to take a drink order on the other side of the bar.
“Gotta respect that girl.” Aiden flashed a cheesy smile.
“I don’t.” Ronan rested his head on the bar. Watching Destiny preen for her ex was too much for him.
“Aren’t you the one who cut her loose, Ronan?”
Was he?
He couldn’t remember.
All he clearly recalled was being scared shitless at how perfect she was for him, and when she seemed the tiniest bit hesitant, he used it against her to torture them both.
“You know I don’t do serious.” Even as he spoke the words, his heart called him a liar.
He’d happily do serious with Destiny in a heartbeat, and maybe that was the problem. Maybe he never wanted to be in the position to have that much control over someone, that much responsibility. Maybe finding the little club whores to play with was enough for him. He had his work, which kept him busy.
“Destiny wouldn’t have approved of my work schedule. You know that was a problem in her marriage.” He surprised himself with how even he sounded.
And that was true. He traveled probably every bit as much as her ex did, and he didn’t like the way that thought always made him think of her in Aiden’s bed.
“And Destiny told you your work was a problem for her?”
“She didn’t have to. She fucked you to show just how much of a problem it was for her the last time. Of course to look at them now you’d never know there’d been any trouble.” He grumbled half under his breath, but he was still pissed about how much time she was spending with that man.
He’d seen them swimming together. He heard they�
�d gone to the amusement park one day. They closed the bar down more than once, and two nights ago he’d seen them sharing a candlelit late supper in the Italian restaurant that had just opened inside the resort.
“That’s not fair, and do I have to deck you again? I told you this would happen!”
Ronan got up in his face. “No, your prediction was that I’d hurt her.”
He looked across the lobby again. They had moved to a more secluded area, and Oscar was holding her hand. The only one hurting seemed to be him.
“She doesn’t seem desperately wounded to me.” Ronan stood up.
“Where are you going?”
“To a real bar that serves its customers!” He stumbled just slightly.
Aiden jumped off the barstool and followed behind him.
“You can’t drive like this. If you’re determined to get shitfaced, come back to my suite. I’ve got the good stuff, and Bella and her nanny are staying with Mrs. Murphy tonight.”
Ronan considered the offer. It’d be a hell of a lot easier.
“And what of your wife?”
“Working, if you can believe it.” Aiden rolled his eyes.
“Fine. Let’s go, but I intend to get really damned drunk, and I don’t want no one around playing mom, got it?” He slapped Aiden’s shoulder.
“Yeah. I got it.”
Together they walked across the lobby and courtyard to the building in the back where most of the employees were housed for the duration of the renovation.
“Did she tell you she wants to turn this building into long-term rentals?” Aiden’s lame attempt at casual conversation was duly noted.
“No, she never mentioned.” But it sounded just like her.
“She wants to provide a place for people in a hard place, or people who are just damn lonely, like Mrs. Murphy.”
They climbed the steps together, with Ronan stumbling only twice.
“She’s got a soft heart. She needs someone to look out for it.” Ronan knew people would always try to take advantage of her goodness, and for some sick reason, he wanted to be her watchdog.
The Seduction of Destiny Rhode [The Seduction 3] (Siren Publishing Ménage and More) Page 19