Drake swallowed hard but shrugged into his shirt with an encouraging smile. He’d screwed up royally but surely it wasn’t too late to make everything better. He wasn’t joining the fucking witness protection program, never to be seen again. He simply needed a little space. “I’ll call you, okay?” He left his shirt half open and pulled her into his arms. Her body was rigid and he tried to stroke her hair so she would relax. “I really wish I didn’t have to leave.”
How could Drake explain that what had just happened between them changed everything? Changed him? It was better to get his head together and figure it out for himself before he emoted all over Tori. Women didn’t like a man who didn’t have his shit together. They wanted a man to fucking be in control.
He was far from that.
His voice was soft and coaxing but Tori wasn’t the same naive little girl who had left Corville. She’d seen men walk out after sex and this was a classic “fuck and run.” Drake didn’t have any intention of calling her. Ever.
Tori shrugged. “You can call if you want. I guess. Whatever.”
The man of her dreams scowled, perhaps in anger but definitely in confusion. “Whatever? Don’t you want me to call?”
Tori twisted out of his arms and tightened the belt on her robe hoping she looked a hell of a lot more casual than she felt. In truth, she was dying inside with disappointment. Her idol had feet of clay.
She wouldn’t let him see how devastated she felt.
“You can call if you want, Drake. Geez, don’t get all possessive.”
His eyebrows shot up and his jaw went slack. “Um, okay. I get it. I forgot you’re from the city, Tori. Tonight was just a fun thing, I guess.”
Her hand gripped the bedpost, her knuckles white, as she told another whopper of a lie. “Sure. Fun. Nothing to get all serious about.”
Drake hopped on one foot and then the other as he pulled on his boots. “Maybe we can get together again sometime. You know, have some more fun.”
“Maybe.” Tori tried to sound noncommittal, as if their lovemaking hadn’t been all that impressive instead of the tidal wave of pleasure it had actually been. “I have a lot going on these days.”
Drake shoved his hands in his pockets and nodded. “Sure. I get that. Well, then maybe you can call me?”
In your dreams, jerk. Go ahead and wait by the phone.
“I’ll do that.” Tori stepped back so he had a clear path to the bedroom door. He seemed to hesitate for a moment as if he had something else to say, but sighed instead and headed for the entrance. She wondered if she was the first woman who had ever put Drake James in his place.
Even if she was, it didn’t feel all that wonderful. It felt kind of crappy to treat him the same way he had probably treated her and dozens of other girls. She really wasn’t cut out for this.
She opened the front door and looked him right in the eye. He should never know how much his behavior had hurt her.
“Well, good night. Thank you for a nice evening. The pizza and movie were great.”
“My pleasure. I’m sure we’ll be seeing each other soon.”
Drake ducked out of the apartment and she closed the door behind him and listened for his truck to pull away. When the sound of the engine grew faint, she opened her door again and padded across the hall. Pressing the doorbell of Kasi’s apartment, she felt the rise of good old-fashioned anger churn in her gut. Kasi finally opened the door, bleary-eyed, her hair sticking up on end.
“He’s a total asshole,” Tori announced before her friend could ask what the hell was going on.
Kasi’s expression immediately turned from puzzled to sympathetic. “I know, honey. Come in and tell me all about it.”
Tori followed Kasi into the apartment. She had been right. Drake hadn’t been worth all the years of love and hero worship. It was the end of an era.
Perhaps now she could move on. Maybe.
Chapter Five
Tori watched Drake walk by the big window of the diner. She had an excellent view of his tight buns from her vantage point and she watched him until he disappeared around the corner. She’d spent last weekend in a funk but had awoken Monday morning with a new attitude. Drake might be a typical womanizing jerk but that didn’t mean her life was over. It simply meant she wouldn’t be marrying him and having those three children she’d planned – Liam, Hannah, and Kyle.
“I’m totally over him,” Tori declared smugly as she and Kasi shared brunch on Sunday just one week later. “I’ve barely thought of him all week.”
Kasi sighed and signaled for the waitress to refill her water. “You’ve mentioned him every single day. You are not over him. Far from it.”
“So I have a few things to work on. I’m not in love with him anymore,” Tori argued. “I’ve given up on the big wedding and the house we were going to restore together.”
“Holy hell, Tori, did Drake get to decide anything in this life together? I kind of feel sorry for the guy. Honestly, it seems like he was just along for the ride in your fantasies.”
Kasi’s words stung as they hit home. As the days had passed and Tori had time to think about things, she’d realized that she hadn’t really taken Drake’s feelings into account. At all. He really had been an afterthought.
She hadn’t much liked the image of herself as a master manipulator.
Her cheeks heated under Kasi’s inquisitive stare. “Shit, I don’t know what I was thinking. Things got out of hand. I convinced myself Drake was one way when he’s really something else.”
“He’s not a jerk. Not any worse than any other man.” Kasi played with her fork, her lips pursed in thought. “I hate to admit it but he’s actually well thought of by females in the area. He might have been a dog with girls at one time, but he’s not now.”
“Are you defending him?” Tori asked indignantly. “He got out of bed so fast he practically ran to the front door pulling up his pants.”
“Far be it for me to defend the male of the species,” Kasi replied evenly. “However, maybe he really did need to get up early. Maybe he was feeling pressured.” Kasi leaned forward her brows drawn together. “I can see how that might happen. Did you say anything to him afterward?”
“I said the sex was amazing.” Tori slumped in the seat of the booth. “I said that he was amazing.”
“You told me the sex wasn’t any good,” Kasi gasped. “Was it or wasn’t it? Spit it out.”
“It was,” Tori admitted. “Out of this world good. Off the charts intense.”
“And you called him amazing?” Kasi shook her fork at Tori. “Well, no wonder he hightailed it out of your place. He wasn’t prepared for what happened and he ran. Typical male behavior.”
“You call everything typical,” Tori muttered. “It didn’t feel typical when it was happening to me.”
“I know. He was supposed to declare his undying love and sweep you off your feet.” Kasi’s tone was cynical. “Perhaps you should forgive him since he didn’t know his part in the play.”
Tori held up her hand in surrender. “I get it. I built up some crazy fantasy all around him and now that I see he’s simply human, I can’t take it. I see my folly now. Are you happy?”
“Not particularly.” Kasi shrugged. “You’re disillusioned and hurt. Drake has no clue what happened to him or why, and you both haven’t given this relationship a real chance. So no, I am not happy.”
“Are you suggesting I go out with him again?” The mere idea made Tori’s heart pound with something like fear and maybe a little excitement.
“Nope. I’m suggesting you get to know him and then decide if you want to go out with him again. You know, like regular people do.” Kasi smiled knowingly.
“After the fiasco in my bedroom just how do you propose I get to know him? Stalking him clearly isn’t the answer.”
Kasi was grinning ear to ear. “Leave it to me. I know exactly what you should do.”
Tori groaned and rested her chin in her hands. “I guess you couldn’t s
crew this up any worse than I have. I’m putty in your hands. Direct me.”
“I need you to bake about a dozen cakes. Any flavors.” Kasi tapped her chin and nodded.
“A dozen cakes? Are you hungry?” Tori tried to joke when she was feeling nervous.
“No, but I know some people who are. Will you do it?”
“Yes. Are you going to tell me what it’s for?” Tori was almost afraid to ask. Was this some scheme to get to Drake’s heart through his stomach? After a dozen cakes, he’d need insulin therapy.
“You’re going to get involved with the community. And with Drake James.”
“Damn, this is good.” Logan Wright hummed in appreciation as he took another big bite of the red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting that Tori had made for the picnic. Once a year, the sheriff’s department had a get together for some of the county’s children that were up for adoption and the prospective parents. It gave them a casual, no pressure venue to meet and get to know one another. Drake had volunteered to help for the last five years.
It was always a fun affair with softball, volleyball, good food, and lots of laughs. Several families were created each time and this day didn’t appear to be any different. At least a dozen hopeful adoptive parents were spending time with even more hopeful adoptees.
“How many pieces of cake have you had anyway?” Drake popped the last bite of the chocolate fudge flavor into his mouth. Tori’s baking was fantastic. Everyone had been enjoying her treats all day. Drake had also been enjoying the view of her as she played volleyball in a pair of khaki shorts and bright blue knit shirt with short sleeves and a V-neck. Her limbs were tanned gold from the sun and there were glints of blonde in her brown curls. She must have spent some time outside in the last two weeks.
“Three, but who’s counting?” Logan grinned and followed Drake’s gaze to where Tori was serving up the ball. “Whatever happened to you and Tori? Didn’t you go out on your date?”
Drake really didn’t want to talk about his date with Tori. The fact was he was confused as hell about what had happened. All signs seemed to point to her liking him, and then at the end he’d gotten the brush off. He knew she was pissed off that he hadn’t stuck around to talk and cuddle or whatever the hell women wanted to do after having sex but he’d needed to get out of there and think. The fact that she might have been disappointed in his sexual performance was deeply shaming for him as well.
He might be fine for the local ladies around here, but apparently he came up short when compared with the sophisticated lovers from New York City. That still left a bitter taste in his mouth. The sex for him had been out of this world good, but for her…
“We went out.” Drake shrugged, hoping his boss would leave the subject alone. “We just didn’t click, that’s all.”
“Didn’t click,” Logan repeated. “What the fuck does that mean?”
“Leave the poor man alone.” Ava Wright, Logan’s wife sat down next to him and gave him a big kiss. “Maybe there was no chemistry.”
Drake really didn’t want to have a talk about his love life with his boss’s wife. “That’s it. No chemistry.”
Logan scowled and put his arm around his pretty wife. “Bullshit. The way you’re staring at her she could burst into flames. That’s chemistry, my friend.”
Drake rubbed the back of his neck. “It didn’t work out. No big deal.”
Ava gave him a sympathetic look. “Did you do something you shouldn’t have? I swear men don’t know anything about romance.”
“I didn’t do anything wrong,” Drake said defensively. “I took her to the drive in. We ate pizza in the truck and watched Vertigo.”
“And then?” Ava leaned forward, merriment in her eyes. “What happened at the end of the date?”
“Nothing.” Drake was a gentleman, dammit. He didn’t kiss and tell. “Not a thing.”
“I’m not surprised,” Logan answered dryly. “The drive-in and pizza? Shit, you’re a real charmer, Drake. That’s the best you could do?”
“I’m sure Tori enjoyed herself. You fed me pizza if I remember correctly.”
Logan’s grin spread across his face and Ava’s cheeks turned a pretty pink. “I remember very well.”
They were holding hands and looking at each other like they wanted to be alone. Drake was torn between being completely embarrassed and sort of envious. No one had ever looked at him like that. Ava looked at Logan like he was a god or something.
Which was the exact opposite way Tori looked at Drake whenever they saw each other in town. He was one rung below navel lint in her opinion and he didn’t know how to make it better. He’d screwed up that first night they were together. Apparently he was forever tainted in her eyes. He wouldn’t mind a second chance but simply couldn’t imagine a scenario where he’d get one. That ship had sailed and he’d better get used to it.
“Hey, Deputy! Come and play!” Jerard, a young man of about eight and one of the hopeful foster children, yelled from the volleyball court, motioning for Drake to join them. He hesitated for only a second before making his excuses to Logan and Ava. Some physical exertion would get his mind off of Tori Saunders.
Jerard tossed him the white ball and pointed to the back row. “You serve. Carl hurt his shoulder and went to get some ice. All you old guys need to be careful.”
The grin on the kid’s face showed he was only giving Drake a hard time.
“I’ll show you old. Get ready for some heat, Jer.” Drake snorted and tossed the ball in the air as he sized up the opposing team. Tori was playing the back area and was crouched low in readiness, her eyes sparkling and a mile wide smile on her face.
Get your mind off of her. Now.
For the next thirty minutes, Drake lunged and grunted while trying to keep his gaze focused on the ball and not Tori’s gorgeous body. She wasn’t muscled like an athlete but she had a natural grace that he couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away from.
“Not bad, old man.” Jerard laughed as they all high-fived after Drake’s winning serve.
“I think I need something cold to drink.” Drake sucked in a lungful of air and wiped the sweat from his brow. He worked out three times a week but he rarely played in competitive games any longer. Perhaps it was time to go back to the Thursday night basketball league.
He plunged his hand into the cooler and grabbed an icy bottle. When he straightened, he was looking directly into Tori’s eyes. She immediately dropped her gaze and pulled a water from the cooler.
“Excuse me,” she said and then tried to make a break for it. Drake hated the awkwardness between them. He caught her arm and she turned quickly in surprise.
“Listen, can we talk?” he asked. “I think we probably should.”
She chewed her lower lip in thought but finally, to his relief, nodded. He jerked his head toward the path through the park and they walked along it for awhile not speaking. At a curve in the walkway, there was a park bench under a cluster of trees. It looked quiet and private and just what he had in mind. He put his hand on the small of her back and led her over, trying to ignore the tensing of her muscles when he made contact. They settled down and Drake took a long drink of his water before speaking.
“I wanted to say I’m sorry for our date. Obviously I upset you and that wasn’t my intention. At all. I really feel badly about the whole thing.”
Her little chin was jutted out and she stared down at the label on her water bottle. “What are you apologizing for exactly?”
“For leaving so fast. I think. That is what upset you, right?”
He didn’t mention that his sexual technique might have made her just as happy to have him leave.
She turned to him then and her eyes were bright with unshed tears. He felt about two inches tall.
Fuck.
“Yes.” Tori nodded. “I guess I just didn’t understand the rules. I do now.”
“Rules?” What was it about this woman that completely confused him? “I’m not sure what you mean.”
<
br /> Tori shrugged. “The ‘casual sex rule’, I guess. I just didn’t know you were looking for a quick roll in the hay and then out the door.”
Panic that she misunderstood made his heart beat faster and his throat tight. “That’s not what I was looking for. Honest. It was just…”
A great communicator he was not. Especially about feelings.
“Just bad?” she prompted, “Or just good? I’m a big girl—I can take the truth. Were you disappointed?”
“Fuck no.” Drake grabbed her shoulders and turned her so they were looking directly at each other. He could see the hurt he’d put there and he wanted to take it away as quickly as possible. By any means. “I thought it was great. Too great. I got freaked out and I jumped up to leave. I’m not proud of it but there it is.”
He must have said the right thing because Tori was starting to smile. “Too great? I don’t think there’s any such thing, Deputy.”
He couldn’t stop the question that had been eating at his gut since that night. “Were you disappointed? Did I not…?”
Tori’s brows were knitted together as if she didn’t understand the question. Suddenly her expression cleared and she practically jumped up from the bench. “No! No way. It was good.” Her cheeks turned red. “Very good. You must have known that.”
Drake breathed a little easier, one worry put to rest. “I thought so but then I wondered. You acted like you didn’t care if you ever saw me again.”
He wasn’t that fond of baring his feelings like this but it needed to be done. Their night together had become too confused and it needed to be straightened out.
“At the time I didn’t.” Her lips twisted. “I was pissed off. It hurt to think I was just another notch on your gun belt, so to speak.”
“Never that,” Drake declared. “I admit I haven’t always been the nicest guy when it comes to stuff like that, but I hope I’ve outgrown most of my bad behavior. Tori, I’d like a second chance.”
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