“I’m so sorry, Caleb.” Her hand covered his, and then he watched the shock of discovery hit her full force. “Jonathan?”
“Is her son.”
Her lip trembled and she closed her eyes for a brief moment. Caleb felt helpless, and for the first time in his life, he was speechless. When she looked at him again, her expression filled with compassion and something he couldn’t quite define. She brushed the back of his hand in a soothing motion. Had she seen the pain of his sister’s death in his face? Why had he started this?
“My parents died quite a long time ago, so I know what it’s like to grow up without a loving father and mother.”
Caleb witnessed her own sorrow deep in the depths of her eyes. He turned his hand so that hers rested in his palm. The action seemed to bring her back from the past.
“I’m sorry your sister died but I’m glad she left you, Jonathan.”
“Thank you.”
“It’s a great responsibility to raise someone else’s child. If you have even a small inkling that you can’t provide the nurturing and constant attention and love Jonathan needs, then you should place him with a family that can give this type of support.”
Her words were an affront to his character, but Caleb suspected she spoke from experience rather than a desire to insult him. He purposefully loaded his answer with double meaning.
“Jonathan is all the family I have left. I already love him and I will protect him with my life. I only want people around him that have his best interest at heart. Less than that is unacceptable.” He watched for a change in her composure. Better she should know now what he expected of her.
She smiled. “I better get you something to eat.”
Surprised again by this unpredictable woman, Caleb tightened his grip on her hand. “I’d rather talk than eat.”
Julianne stood to her feet still clutching his hand. “We can do both.” She reached out and caught his other hand, pulling him to his feet.
“How about pancakes? I have all the fixings.” Reluctantly, he let her go and they both walked to the kitchen.
“Sure, show me where things are, and I’ll whip up a batch.” She pulled a skillet off one of the hooks that hung over the wood cook stove.
Flour, baking powder, one egg and a jar of cold milk were soon gathered on the table. “Do you have any sugar?” Julianne found a large wooden bowl and began mixing the ingredients together.
Caleb got the sugar and set it beside the milk. He wondered what she planned on doing with it, but didn’t ask.
Jonathan woke up with a cry.
“I’ll get him.” Caleb picked up the little fellow. He took the baby back into the kitchen where Julianne worked.
“There’s a bottle in his bag.” She offered pouring pancake batter into a hot skillet. “Be careful, that nipple isn’t going to last much longer.”
The smell of batter cooking filled the house with a sense of warmth. Jonathan sucked noisily on the bottle. Caleb almost believed they were a real family.
Almost.
He still didn’t know enough about his new wife to trust her. Had she taken Sloan’s money? And what was she running from?
She interrupted his thoughts. “Here, give me the baby, and you eat while it’s hot.”
Caleb did as she said. He watched her sink into a chair and cuddle the baby close. “Aren’t you going to eat?”
“As soon as Jonathan finishes.” She rocked back and forth with the baby.
He picked up the honey and started to pour it. Her voice stopped him. “Don’t you want to try them first?” She brought the baby to her shoulder and gently patted his back.
Caleb tore a bite size piece of the pancake off. He used his fingers and put it in his mouth. Sweetness teased his taste buds. “It’s sweet.”
“Do you like it?”
Jonathan’s burp filled the room and Julianne smiled at the baby. “Good boy.”
Caleb wondered if Julianne knew of his love for sweets. “It’s very good.” He continued to eat and watch Julianne play with the baby.
After a few minutes, Jonathan yawned. Caleb stood and reached for the baby. “Here, I’ll put him to bed.” He noticed the pink fill Julianne’s cheeks.
“I can do it.”
“I’m sure you can, but you need to eat, and I don’t mind.” Caleb gently took the baby from her. He carried him to his cradle and slowly rocked it back and forth until Jonathan fell asleep.
When he returned to the kitchen, Julianne had already cleaned up. She stood by the window looking out into the darkness.
Caleb stopped a few inches from her and looked over her head into the night. If Julianne felt his presence, she didn’t show it. The night was black; no light from the moon or the stars could be seen.
“It’s late.” Her soft whisper surprised him.
Now was the time to bring up the subject he knew both of them had avoided all day. Would she be pleased by his thoughts on the subject? He took a deep breath and blurted.
“It’s time for bed, Julianne.”
Chapter 6
Julianne spun around and sputtered. “I beg your pardon?”
“That didn’t come out right.” She watched Caleb’s face and neck turn beet red.
“I should say not.” New fear enveloped her. Julianne pushed her back as close to the window as she could.
They were married, and he had every right to expect her to sleep with him, but surely there was a better way of saying it. What kind of man had she married? Just when she thought he was kind and understanding, he blurts out ‘it’s time for bed’ as if he could demand it.
Caleb took a step away from her. She flinched when he brought one hand up. She expected him to grab her at any moment and drag her to bed.
He combed his fingers through his hair looking even more embarrassed. “Look, I only meant it is time for us to get some sleep. You can take the bed down here, and I’ll take the one upstairs.”
Her gaze followed his finger that pointed upwards. “It was to be my room anyway until I could build on extra rooms.”
He didn’t mean to sleep with her? To make her perform her wifely duties? She studied him for several long moments. Could he be believed?
“Look, you and I don’t know each other well enough to share that kind of intimacy. I want my wife to be in love before we are man and wife in more than just name. I believe that is the way God would want it to be, also.” He dropped his hands. “I moved my stuff up there a few days ago.”
Julianne wanted to believe him. Even as he climbed the stairs, she still wasn’t sure of his intentions.
For several long minutes she heard him moving around above. The creak of a mattress told her he’d lain down. “Goodnight, Julianne.”
She moved to her own bed and sat down. “Goodnight, Caleb.”
A little later, his soft snores filled the house. Julianne checked on the baby, and then prepared for bed. She lay on the soft feather mattress listening to her new husband sleep above her.
The baby woke her restless sleep several times during the night, needing to be changed and fed one more time. She took care of his needs and prayed he wouldn’t wake the man upstairs.
When morning came, Julianne was exhausted. Long before the sun rose in the sky, she heard Caleb get up and move around. His soft footsteps came down the stairs and moved about the kitchen.
She peaked from under the covers to see what he was doing. Julianne sighed, glad he’d found the pancakes she’d left out for his breakfast.
Then, he turned in her direction. Julianne closed her eyes tightly and pretended to be asleep. She felt his warm lips on her forehead and heard his soft whisper.
“Have a good day, Julianne. Be sure and bolt the door when I leave. Don’t go into the woods today, we have a lot to go over before you leave the yard.” He kissed her forehead once more and left.
As soon as the door shut, Julianne bolted from the bed and locked the door. She heard his soft chuckle on the other side. Mortified he
hadn’t left; she raced back to the bed and dived under the covers.
Then, she giggled.
He’d cared enough to make sure she had bolted the door. It was sneaky and sweet at the same time. Her heart warmed towards her new husband.
In a matter of minutes, she was sound asleep.
Jonathan woke her up several hours later. Julianne quickly replaced his wet diaper and fed him. Then, she ate a pancake from the night before. Next, she prepared a pot of stew and placed it on the stove to cook.
She straightened the little cabin and put Jonathan down for a nap. Her gaze moved to the room upstairs. Should she go up and clean it?
Julianne made sure the front door was bolted, and then climbed the stairs. A bed took up most of the floor. She noted it hadn’t been made, and wondered if she should make it. But if she did, he would know she had been in his room, and she wasn’t sure she wanted him to know she’d been snooping.
The sound of knocking made her decision for her. Julianne raced down the stairs as fast as her feet would let her without slipping. She raced to the door and demanded.
“Who’s there?”
“Maggie.”
Julianne unbolted the door. “Come on in.” She pulled the door open to its fullest.
Maggie dragged a big bag across the threshold. “It’s about time you opened that door. A woman could die of heat stroke while you dallied around in here.”
“I’m sorry. I was cleaning and didn’t hear you. Besides, it’s not hot out there.”
Maggie dropped into a chair. “No but it was a nice trip to make on a sunny day. I’m parched.”
Julianne shut the door and turned to face her visitor. “What’s in the bag?” Julianne pushed her hair out of her eyes.
“A couple of the men sent their laundry for you to do. You still want to take in laundry, don’t you?”
Julianne dipped out a cup of cool well water and gave it to Maggie. “Of course I do, but I’d rather we not tell Caleb just yet.”
She watched Maggie tip the dipper and drink its contents before handing it back to her. “Why in the world would you want keep it a secret from Caleb?”
“Well, he’s a proud man, and I feel really bad that he had to pay Sloan the money for my passage. I want to earn the money back and that way we will have it as a nest egg.”
Julianne accepted the dipper from Maggie. “Would you like more?”
Maggie waved the offer away. “Naw, I still don’t understand what difference it would make if you told Caleb you’re doing laundry for the men.”
Julianne studied the creases between Maggie’s eyes. The woman really didn’t understand. “Maggie, if you had a husband, how do you think he would feel if he knew you were cooking for over fifty men a day, three times a day for money.”
She watched as understanding dawned on Maggie. “Are you saying it’s an issue of pride?”
Julianne nodded. “That’s exactly what I’m saying. After I make enough money to replace what he paid, I’ll tell him what I’m doing. Then, if he doesn’t want me to continue working, I’ll quit.”
Maggie slapped the table and laughed. “Okay gal, I’ll help you. As far as those mule heads in camp know, I’m doing their laundry and none will be the wiser.” She stood to go.
“Thanks Maggie.” Julianne hugged her new friend close. “I promise I’ll let Caleb in on our little secret as soon as I can.”
The older woman seemed uncomfortable with the hug, but didn’t push her away. “Just be sure that you do. I don’t like deceiving, Caleb. He’s a good man.”
****
Hours later, Caleb wondered what he’d find when he returned home. Would his new wife cower from him? Lord, please let her learn not to fear me.
He opened the door a crack. “Is that beef stew I smell?” A quick glance took in the spotless cabin and Julianne standing at the stove with a big ladle in one hand and Jonathan cradled in her other arm.
“It’s about ready. Have you washed up?” Julianne stirred the contents of the big pot.
“Sure did. Here let me take this little fellow off your hands.” Caleb walked across the room and took the baby. He sat down in his chair and really looked at the baby.
Jonathan had a wide forehead, aqua colored eyes and a round face. “He looks like Kathleen.”
Julianne dished up two bowls of stew and set them on the table. “He sure is sweet.” She turned to the counter behind her and placed fresh bread on the table.
“That he is.” Caleb watched the baby’s eyes slowly shut. “I’m going to lay him down, and then we can eat.”
He carried the baby into Julianne’s bedroom, noticing the neatly made bed and her things put away. A warm feeling washed over him. The baby was well taken care of, the house clean, and dinner smelled delicious. It was what every married man wanted when he came home from a hard days work.
Caleb returned and took a seat at the table. She surprised him by asking, “Will you say grace, please?”
As he prayed aloud over the meal, he silently prayed for Julianne.
“Lord, thank you for this food and the nourishment for our bodies.”
And thank you for Julianne.
“And, bless the hands that have prepared it.”
Lord, bless my wife and help her no longer to fear me.
“Keep us safe, in Jesus name. Amen.”
Caleb raised his head and met her clear blue eyes.
She smiled, and a tender look came over her face. Was she thankful she’d married him? He hoped so.
Julianne fiddled with her ring. “Thank you.”
He felt her gaze upon him as he took a bite of the cornbread. Sweetness coated his tongue. Her Mama must have taught her that the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach.
“This is great.” He chewed and swallowed the tasty treat.
“Thank you.” Again she played with the ring on her finger. “Oh, I forgot your coffee.”
She was up in a flash. Julianne grabbed the coffee and cup all in one action. Caleb watched her pour the hot liquid before returning the pot to the back of the stove.
As soon as she was seated again he asked her. “Do you know what that ring stands for, Julianne?”
Her gaze moved to the ring in question. “It means I’m your wife.”
He set his spoon on the table and reached across to capture her hand. Caleb turned the ring watching the gold reflect the sunlight that streamed through the only window in the house. “Yes it does. What else does it mean to you?”
She tugged on her hand but Caleb refused to release her. “It means I’m yours. I clean the house, cook the meals, and watch after Jonathan.”
“Anything else?” He raised his head and searched her face.
“It means I am to do anything you ask me too.” She whispered and lowered her lashes.
Caleb rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb, enjoying the softness of her skin. “Come with me.” He pulled her to her feet.
“But the food will get cold.” She tried again to pull her hand out of his but he hung on tight.
“We won’t be gone that long, Julianne. I just want to show you something.” Caleb pulled her up and around the table. He led her to the door and outside. On the porch he stopped and pulled her in front of him. He dropped her hand and put both hands on her shoulders.
“See the land?”
She nodded.
“It’s yours.”
“See the garden?”
Again he waited for her nod.
“It’s yours. Everything I have is yours.”
He dropped his hands from her shoulders and grabbed her hand again. Caleb led her back into the house. He took her into the bedroom. Julianne stiffened by his side. “See the bed?”
Caleb waited several long moments while she worked up the courage to nod. When she did he announced. “It is yours until you are ready to share it.”
He pulled her to the foot of the bed where Jonathan lay sleeping. “See the baby?”
Jul
ianne kept her gaze on the baby and nodded.
“He is yours.”
Caleb led her back to the kitchen table. “Julianne, this cabin, the land, even the children are ours. Not just mine, not just yours. We are married, and to me that means everything I have is yours. You are not my slave, and I’m not your master. We are partners, and some day, I hope that we will become best friends.”
He watched a tear trickle down her face. Gently he led her back to her seat. When she was seated again he knelt beside her and picked up the hand with her wedding band on it. “My grandmother gave me that ring when I was a little boy. She told me to wear it on a chain around my neck so that it would always be close to my heart until the day I found the lady who would hold my heart and the ring.”
A tear fell and ran through both their hands. “That ring means more to me than you will ever know. It means you are my wife, my friend and the woman who holds my heart.”
Her head snapped up. “You don’t love me.”
“You’re right. But I plan to. Love is more than a feeling; it’s actions too. Try to forget about the past, Julianne, and try to trust me a little. Can you do that?”
Chapter 7
The next morning Julianne pulled her robe on, deciding to make a more concentrated effort to be the kind of wife she thought Caleb wanted. She began to prepare breakfast long before she heard rapid movements overhead.
He descended the stairs in a rush. “You didn’t have to make breakfast for me. I could have grabbed something at the cook’s shack.”
“I know. I wanted to.” She set a bowl of gravy and a pan of hot biscuits on the table.
Caleb pulled a chair out and sat down. “Merciful goodness. This is manna from heaven. Thank you.”
His smile warmed her insides.
“I was thinking about going to the river and doing some laundry today.” Julianne handed Caleb a plate. She dipped a ladle into the gravy for him. “If you’ll collect your dirty clothes, I’ll wash yours, too.” She sat down across from him.
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