“Easier said than done,” Maddox grumbled.
Cailin sighed. “It’d be easier if we just went dark.”
The room went silent. Reed swore he could have heard a pin drop.
“No,” his father said coolly.
One word, spoken as the Alpha, and that was it. No discussion. But they really wouldn’t have discussed it anyway. No matter what, the Jamensons wouldn’t go evil. That wasn’t their way, their nature.
Cailin’s eyes flashed, her back as stiff as a board. She turned to their father and lifted her chin. “I would never do that. You above all should know that. I was just saying it would be easier, not right.”
“Then don’t say it,” Edward chided. “You are the daughter of the Alpha. You need to set an example and spouting off without thinking doesn’t show that.”
Cailin glared but didn’t answer.
Reed had no idea what it meant to be in her position, the daughter of the Pack. He’d never really thought about it. Maybe he should have noticed her anger before. He took a deep breath. Complicated didn’t even begin to describe his family.
His mother spoke up, breaking into the silence. “Enough you two. Come on, I don’t want to let the food go cold. Eat.”
He was so grateful for his mother. Something was going on with his little sister, but he didn’t know what.
Willow rubbed her tiny hand on her heavily protruding stomach. “I’m so happy the three of you are mated.”
Hannah blushed, her ears red. As a werewolf, Willow could smell the three of them all over each other and feel the bond slowly settling into place. Reed kissed Hannah’s forehead and held her closer. “Thank you, Wil.”
Mel leaned over beside Wil and rubbed the pregnant woman’s stomach with one hand, holding Finn in the other. Mel was really becoming her own wolf in their Pack, someone they could look up to when she became the Alpha’s wife, and not just the Heir’s.
She laughed. “Yes, we needed more women. So welcome, Hannah.”
“Hell, yeah,” Cailin yelled, and pumped her fist.
Kade threw a roll her on the head. “Language.”
“Kade,” his mother scolded. “Don’t throw food.”
They broke out into laughter. This was his family. Dysfunction and all. Not too shabby.
“What’s so funny?” Josh asked as he walked into the room, North on his heels.
They quieted again, but Reed just smiled, though his heart beat in his ears. “Cailin’s potty mouth attacks again and Kade is the equivalent of a twelve-year-old in a cafeteria. Come on and sit; we’re just about to eat.”
Josh smiled. Man, how he loved that smile. He sat on the other side of Hannah and grabbed Reed’s hand and squeezed. Hard. His mate might be putting on a brave face and masking his fear well for others, but he couldn’t hide if from him. And by the way Hannah leaned over into him, Josh couldn’t hide it from her either.
Josh kissed her temple, then leaned over and did the same to Reed. With a shake of his head, Reed leaned back into his chair.
North didn’t know what to do with the demon bite. Damn it.
His father cleared his throat. “Since we are all here now, I’d like to formally welcome Josh and Hannah to our Pack.”
His family smiled at his two mates.
“For most of my life, our Pack has been without a Healer. But now, in Hannah, we have one. A talented one by the way her power resonates off her.” His dad smiled. His Alpha’s strength washed over them, welcoming them into their fold. “And, we have a new enforcer to join our ranks.”
Reed started. “What? Who?”
His dad threw back his head and laughed. “I mean your other new mate…Josh.”
Reed looked over at Josh and saw a similar confused expression.
“Um…sir…I’m…I’m not sure I understand you,” Josh stuttered.
His father lifted a brow. “Oh, I think you do, son. I need another guard. Someone to protect the Pack. And with your background and desire to help, I think you fit the bill. I know you’ve been looking for how to fit in and contribute, so here you go.”
Josh furrowed his brows. Reed wondered what he was thinking.
“Don’t look at me like that.” His dad scowled. “I didn’t make this job up for you. We really need you, and you'll be an asset. Don’t let your fears of rejection and loss, cloud your judgment.”
Josh gulped.
“But he’s human,” Hannah blurted out as a heavy blush filled her cheeks.
Josh laughed, Reed joining him.
“About that…” Edward interrupted. “Without the bite, you’d be human, and eventually, if you wanted to stay with Hannah and Reed for eternity, we would change you into a wolf. But with the bite, you may be turning into something else.”
Hannah and Josh blanched while Reed’s pulse quickened. Oh, Jesus, what had his dad found out? He couldn’t lose Josh. Not now.
“I’ve talked to the elders.” His father cursed, then shot an apologetic look to Finn. “They never like talking to anyone, and always talk in riddles, but that’s their prerogative. They said that Josh might be stronger than humans now, long lived as well.”
Hannah gasped, but the others in the room remained silent. Reed wouldn’t lose Josh to old age?
“We’ll have to wait and see,” his father continued. “I can tell something is different, the way his power resonates. He may not need to change to a wolf to live in the bond the three of you hold.”
The three of them relaxed somewhat.
Josh nodded. “Okay. I can do that. I’ll be honored.”
“Good.” His dad smiled. “We need some new blood with good ideas to help protect the Pack. Kade’s taking over Adam’s job for as long it is needed, but I want you to help him.”
“Okay,” Josh answered.
Reed gripped Josh’s hand harder and leaned into Hannah. His family trusted his mates. It was a far cry from when they weren’t even allowed in the room during certain discussions. Things were coming together.
Chapter 21
Blurry images filled with grays and blacks mingled with reds and crimsons flashed across Josh’s vision. He squinted, focusing on the forms, trying to make sense of them. People milled around, moving past him. Josh tilted his head. Where was he?
He kept walking, past the stares of the people that had said they embraced him, sending flames into his back. The mummers of curiosity at his presence in their den stung like little pin pricks dancing along his skin. Why did he care what these strangers thought? He had nothing. No ties. Nothing to show for his efforts.
Deep, throaty laughter echoed along the forest’s edge, calling him. He followed, the sound pulling him like a bull on a chain. A giggle broke through the masculine laughter, causing him to stumble.
His witch.
Hannah.
He changed directions, trailing after the voice that called to him.
The trees blurred, a smoky haze dulling his vision. He shook his head and stopped.
His Hannah stood in front of him naked, bare to the elements.
“Josh, I’ve missed you,” his vixen whispered.
He strode towards her, intent solely on tasting her lips. She looked up, utter trust and pleasure in her gaze. Her skin felt soft under his trailing fingers as he led them to her neck.
And squeezed.
Her eyes bulged, a plea on her lips.
And he smiled.
****
Josh shot up out of his dreams, panting heavily. He glanced down at his hands, thankfully they were not around his mate’s neck. Swallowing hard, he looked down at Reed and Hannah, sleeping peacefully, curled into one another.
Dear God, what the hell had happened?
What kind of sick fuck would dream about squeezing the life out of the woman he loved? Shaken, he gulped and tried to calm his rapid heartbeat. The dream had started off peacefully as he walked through the den, but shadows cast doubt upon him, threatening to drown him in their forsaken promises.
Josh sl
id out of bed, careful not to wake his slumbering bedmates, and locked himself in the bathroom. He turned on the faucet and splashed his face with ice-cold water. He gripped the sink, swallowing the bile rising in his throat and looked at his reflection.
A flash of red passed over his eyes, and he bit back a scream.
Jesus, what was happening to him?
Was he in control?
He couldn’t hurt Reed or Hannah. No. That would kill him quicker than a bullet searing his flesh. But what could he do about it? Leave?
“Josh?” Reed called quietly from their room.
“I’m okay. Go back to sleep; I’ll be there in a minute,” Josh promised.
“Are you sure?”
Josh shook his head again and walked back into the bedroom. He strode to the bed and kissed Reed softly on the lips. Oh, how he loved that now familiar sandalwood taste.
“I’m fine, just a nightmare.” Just a horrific nightmare that threatened everything he had but didn’t deserve.
Reed scrunched his brows. “Okay, get back in where it’s warm.” He lifted up the blanket, inviting him in.
Josh smiled then slid into bed, curling his body around Reed’s naked form. He reached around and caressed Hannah, who lay sleeping in Reed’s arms. He brushed a kiss on Reed’s temple and settled in.
“Good night,” he whispered.
“Dream well,” Reed answered, half asleep.
Oh, if only he could.
****
Later that day, Hannah and Josh were in her workshop getting a few things done. Water splashed on the sideboard, and Josh cursed. Dammit, his mind just wasn’t on his actions today.
“Are you okay?” Hannah asked.
“Just clumsy.” He smiled.
“Really, Mr. SEAL? Now why don’t I believe that?”
He sighed. There was no hiding from this woman sometimes. Well, with most things. “I didn’t sleep well, I guess.” He shrugged and kissed her frown. “I’m fine. I got up in the middle of the night and splashed water on my face, and when I came back, I held the both of you. It helped.”
Her smile could have melted glaciers. “I’m happy we could help, but I don’t like that you can’t sleep. Do you want me to make you something?”
Josh shook his head. He never did drugs—illegal or the herbal variety—they messed up his Finding, and he told her so.
“Maybe I can work with something. I mean, you have a psychic talent that must be related to magic in a way. If I dig deep enough, maybe I can find a way to help.”
God, he loved this woman and her caring nature.
“Don’t trouble yourself. I can work through it. I’ve been through worse.” He shuddered, thinking back to his times on deployment when it was worse.
Hannah gripped his hands and ran her thumbs in soothing circles on his pulse. “I hate when I see that shadow in your eyes. I feel like I know you so well, but I hardly know anything about your past. Tell me, please?”
He looked down into her dove gray eyes and could have drowned in the warmth and worry. He’d never spoken about his family or where he’d come from before. Not to anyone, not even his buddies on his team. And those guys were the ones who he’d die for—and almost had. But he’d held himself back because there was a part of himself that he couldn’t share. And now, in this weird three-way relationship, he was doing it again.
Josh sighed. He hated sharing his feelings, his thoughts. It wasn’t something he did, something he could do. He was a SEAL, dammit. He’d die strong and in honor, and not by opening himself up.
“What do you want to know?” he asked after the silence stretched too long for him to get out of it.
“Anything, Josh.” Hannah bit her lip, taking a steadying breath. “I’m not asking you to tell me all of your secrets. But frankly I don’t know why you think you need to have any. We’re bonded. Mates. I can feel you in my soul.” She held her palm to her heart, fire in her eyes. “And even if we didn’t have the paranormal connections we do, we’re sleeping together and, in every way but on paper, married. I know nothing about you. How do you think that makes me feel, Josh? Like I’m not worthy. Like you don’t care enough about me or Reed to share yourself with us. I know you are a SEAL. I know you are tough, and can protect us. But you’re shielding yourself from us, Josh. It’s like you take one step forward with our mating then take two steps back when you realize it’s too much.” She took a deep breath.
Dammit. His heart ached. He hated seeing what his inability to give a piece himself did to his mates. “Hannah—”
Hannah held up a hand, effectively shutting him up. “Wait. I know you’re scared of what’s going on with that bite and the Centrals. I get that. I’m scared out of my mind too. But we need to be able to get on with our lives while all this is going on. Because if we don’t, then I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I can take it anymore.” Tears filled her eyes, threatening to spill over.
“Hannah.” Josh pulled her into his arms, her shuddering body warm against his. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m just not good at this. But I promise I’ll do better.”
She lifted her head, her gaze steady on his. “Tell me about your family.”
Josh froze. Of all the things she could have asked, she’d gone there.
Hannah closed her eyes and exhaled, struggling to release herself from his grasp. He held her harder.
“I lived in Montana with my parents,” Josh began.
Hannah quit moving; as if afraid he’d spook and quit speaking. Well, she wasn’t too far off there. He’d better just get it all out now in one fell swoop to get it over with.
“We had a small ranch where we raised horses. It’d been in our family for generations. My father was good at his job, my mother great at being a homemaker. They had everything they wanted. A perfect normal life. Then I turned five and the little boy on a neighboring ranch wandered away from home.”
Josh took a breath, bracing for the memories. The pain.
Hannah wrapped her arms around his waist, comforting him.
“I’d seen the kid before because our mothers had forced us to hang out together. So when my mom came in and told me the boy was lost, I closed my eyes and thought of him. It was a reflex. These images came at me of the boy walking out in the pasture after a stray cat and falling. I could see him clear as day, sitting beneath a tree with a bump on his head and tears down his cheeks. I thought the tree looked familiar, so I told my mom.” Josh shrugged like it was no big deal
But it had been.
“Her eyes had widened, and she slapped me.”
Hannah gasped, and he kissed the top of her head.
“Yeah, I know. It was like she knew what I was talking about, but didn’t want it to be true. Took me years to figure that out. But anyway, my mom told me never to talk about that again, but I didn’t understand. I just wanted to help the boy. So I told my dad. I don’t remember exactly what happened after that, it’s been awhile, but they found the boy eventually, exactly where I’d seen him.”
“Was he okay?” She asked.
“Yeah, a gash on his head and sprained ankle, but he was okay. And so was the dammed cat he found.” Josh let out a dry chuckle.
“The next day my mom took me to a shrink,” he continued, trying to suppress the urge to vomit or flee. “Apparently this affliction wasn’t a new thing for my mom. Her father had it and killed himself.”
“Dear goddess, why?” Hannah’s jaw dropped.
“I’m not sure, but my parents were religious fanatics, and apparently my grandfather was too. So maybe he thought it was cleansing. I just don’t know. They put me in therapy and gave me a drug cocktail that fucked up my system. When that didn’t work and I could still Find, they shaved my head and used shock therapy.”
His body flinched at the thought of those electrodes and their pain.
“Oh, baby, I’m so sorry. What kind of evil human being does that to a child?” Hannah lifted to her tip-toes and kissed the bottom of his chin.
“Me too. But what happened next? That couldn’t be the end of it. And what about your dad?”
Trinity Bound Page 19