His green eyes darkened. “At one time, I had counted you as one of my dearest friends.”
At least he made no professions of love. It was hard enough to watch her sister marry today. It didn’t matter that her husband was a duke. It was the love Isabella had witnessed when the two looked at each other. Isabella wanted to believe Nate loved her as deeply as she loved him, but she had no faith that once he learned the truth, his heart would remain engaged. It was better to enjoy only his friendship than be hurt in the end.
“You made those days easier as well.”
“Yet, you ran. Dismissed me.”
He said this quietly, and it wasn’t possible anyone else could have heard him. It was bad enough she had. “We should not talk of this now.”
Nate stopped and turned toward her. “But we will talk of it.”
“Why?”
“I have many questions, Isabella. I intend to get my answers.”
Her stomach clenched. Why did she feel as if he was speaking of something other than those last days they shared? Of his kiss and her rejection. “Your declaration took me by surprise.” Blast, her eyes were tearing up. “I thought we were friends. It’s what I wished.”
Nate’s green eyes held her as he leaned in close. “That kiss and embrace, was not one friends share.”
Her face heated.
“I never believed what you told me, that you were simply sending me to battle with fond memories. Your passion matched mine that night, Isabella, and the questions that have plagued me since that day have never gone away. The woman I knew would not have been so cruel, yet you thought nothing of taking my heart and stomping it into the ground.”
Isabella had to look away, before she confessed that it was all a lie and that she wanted him more than anything in the world. That she still did.
Goodness, people were looking at them with mild curiosity. Of course, Nate was standing very close to her person and the intensity of his face must have made others wonder. “Now is not the time and place for this discussion,” she hissed quietly. In fact, she wished to never discuss it at all. It was bad enough she’d relived those moments nearly daily over the past few years.
Thankfully he took a step back then nodded. “I shall call on you tomorrow.”
Isabella simply inclined her head. He may wish to call on her, but she would not be at home.
Chapter 20
Isabella was used to rising early and going to Kirkland House, but today, she was out the door before the sun was fully up. She was being a coward, of course, and it really wasn’t necessary that she leave so early to avoid the visit from Nate, but it wasn’t like she’d slept much the night before.
At one time, I had counted you as one of my dearest friends. What had he meant? There was an edge to his tone that she’d not heard before, and it made her uneasy. Was he saying that they’d never really been friends? But that made no sense.
Was it because she rejected him and treated him so coldly and with indifference when he came to her after the Battle of Waterloo?
Why was it so important that he speak with her now? Almost insistent. Especially if he didn’t count her as a friend.
His whole manner and the necessity to speak with her put Isabella on edge. She’d always been certain of the soldier on the Continent. She wasn’t so sure she knew the gentleman in London.
A day hadn’t gone by that she hadn’t thought about Nate, and those memories only became stronger when she took the position at Kirkland House. Many of the men talked of the battles, others wished to forget they occurred, which she could well understand. If she could, Isabella would block out the ugliness of maimed men and the memory of burning flesh. The recollections may be distant, but the dreams still visited her at night. She’d wake in a cold sweat, tears streaming down her cheeks, the smell of death in her nose, panicked by the sea of men, lined up one after the other, and she couldn’t help any of them. Moans and cries echoing in her mind, along with screams of pain. At least, those had been her dreams last night.
If Nate was the reason for her nightmares, why couldn’t he have inspired a pleasant dream instead such as Lady Richmond’s ball? Her last happy memory of that time. He was her friend, and Bertram was still alive.
As he was in London, Nate would be enjoying the Season, possibly even looking for a wife, and all the more reason she would not attend another function. It didn’t matter how much Rosalind may beg, Isabella couldn’t watch as he flirted and danced with respectable young ladies who would make him a fine wife.
She’d never stopped loving him and never would. He took her heart long ago, even if he didn’t realize it, and she couldn’t stand by and watch as he fell in love with another. It had been difficult enough when she thought he loved Mary. But now that she’d experienced his kisses, his passion, and his love, it would be twice as hard to watch him court a lady that was worthy of him.
Isabella let herself in the lower level of Kirkland House and entered the kitchens. The cooks were already busy baking bread and beginning to prepare breakfast for the residents. All the men cooking were veterans, able to live here and work. Many of the men took on jobs around Kirkland House, at least those who were able. Even those who were missing limbs did what they could to help make this place a home. They weren’t charity cases, or they refused to be treated as such. Of course, it was impossible for any of them to find positions once they returned from battle, and this was where they ended up, but not one laid around feeling sorry for himself.
In fact, there was very little nursing for her to do. Some men still needed their injuries treated, and many were in constant pain, which she helped when she could. Otherwise, her services were not much different than before. She read and played games or simply talked to the men, while pretending they didn’t have flasks of brandy and whiskey hidden away, since alcohol was forbidden at Kirkland House.
Chapter 21
Although he’d retired long after midnight, Nate was up before the rest of the household, and was left with nothing to do but cool his heels until an appropriate time to call. At least Isabella knew to expect him this time, and she’d be at home.
Rarely was the family townhouse this quiet, but he knew it would remain so until nearly noon, when his mother finally rose from her bed.
That woman would drive him to Bedlam if he had to live in this household much longer, but did he really wish to obtain bachelor apartments when he wasn’t going to be in London beyond the season?
“You are up rather early.”
Nate turned to find Hannah standing in the entry to the parlor.
“I could say the same for you.”
“I wasn’t the one out until the early morning hours.” Her lips quirked. “In fact, I’m not sure I’ll be allowed to leave this blasted house again. At least not until we return home.”
Hannah was two and twenty and should have married by now. He knew where the fault lie, and it wasn’t with her. Something needed to be done about their mother. Even if it meant visiting Danby.
No, it was best that he deal with the matter himself. He did not want to bring himself to Danby’s attention. “Have you breakfasted?”
“No. I was just going in now.” She smiled. “I prefer my meal hot, and not just warmed waiting for Mother to finally rise from her bed.”
Nate inclined his head. “Shall we?”
He followed her down the corridor and paused just inside the breakfast room. Nate watched as the staff finished setting out the meal on the sideboard before he filled a plate and took a seat across from Hannah.
“Mother hasn’t allowed you to leave at all.”
“No.” Hannah signed. “She’s afraid that we will either run into Danby or a gentleman might steal me away.”
“There is no one of interest at home?”
“No.” She took a sip of her tea. “And further, no one there has the slightest interest in me. Any gentleman worth marrying has already done so.”
“I assume you are at least interested i
n marrying.”
“Yes. I would do nearly anything to escape this household,” Hannah grumbled.
“Good morning,” Tabatha greeted them happily as she entered the room.
“Why are you so happy?” Nate asked.
“Because this is the best part of the day.” Tabitha piled eggs onto her plate before adding toast and took her seat. “We’ve a good two hours before Mother rises.”
“Is she really so bad?”
“She ordered me away from the windows yesterday. Afraid someone might see me.”
“Or Danby,” Hannah added.
Irritation with his mother only mounted.
“Honestly, if I knew that being in London was just like being at home, I wouldn’t have begged to come this year.” Deborah marched to the sideboard and began filling a plate. “I’ve written Sarah to assure her she isn’t missing out on anything grand. Or anything at all for that matter.” At seventeen, Sarah was old enough to be in London and enjoying the season, but their mother had insisted she could wait a year.
“We at least get to leave the house at home.”
Nate tossed his napkin aside. “That is it! I am going to do something about that woman.”
Their eyes widened. “What?”
“I don’t know yet, but I will not allow you to spend the entire season cooped up in this house.” Between him, Sam, and Benjamin, the three of them should be able to thwart their mother somehow. “Is there anyone who has shown an interest?” he asked after a moment.
“We’d have to meet someone first,” Tabitha complained.
There was that, of course. Then he noticed Hannah’s face color a light shade of pink. “Hannah?”
The blush grew darker and she looked down. “He doesn’t know I exist, so it means nothing.”
“Except she knows he exists,” Deborah teased.
“Who?”
“It’s not important,” Hannah insisted.
“The Earl of Stalter,” Tabitha answered with a grin.
“Stalter?” As in Ashton Grell?
“Yes.” Hannah set her cup of tea aside. “Not that any of this matters. We danced once, but as I haven’t been anywhere he’s been, he’s probably forgotten I exist.” She pushed her chair back and stood. “You must excuse me.”
He and Stalter had been classmates when they were younger, and perhaps now was a time to renew their acquaintance.
After he’d dealt with Isabella, he’d see what he could do about bringing Stalter and Hannah together. After that was accomplished, he’d see what he could do for Tabitha and Deborah.
* * *
“You and I are going to talk,” Orlando informed her as he exited the room of a soldier. It wasn’t anything life threatening, but they were trying to find the best treatment for the constant pain in his back. As the doctor who donated his time to Kirkland House was at a loss, Isabella had asked Orlando to come look at the patient.
“Is there anything you can do?”
Orlando shook his head and continued down the stairs. “I have nothing more to offer. I could operate and remove the bits of metal, but I’m afraid it would leave him in a worse condition, and it’s dangerous being so close to his spine.”
That had been the other doctor’s opinion, but Isabella had hoped for a different answer.
“Now, it’s time that you explain a few matters to me.” He paused at the bottom of the stairs in the foyer. “Is there a room where we can speak in private?”
“Of course.” She led him down the corridor and stepped into the smallest of the parlors, which they used for administrative tasks.
“Why didn’t you tell me what Kirkland House was?”
At least he wasn’t going to yell at her for avoiding Nate again. “I assumed you knew.”
“I don’t know what I thought, but not this.” His eyes bore into hers. “Are you sure it’s wise that you work here?”
“It’s where I belong. I knew that the moment I stepped inside.”
“Are they the reason for your nightmares?”
How did he know? “I had them before I came here,” she reminded her brother.
“They’ve become worse.”
“How do you know?”
“My room is next to yours.” His eyes bored into hers. The one sibling in the family she’d never been able to hide anything from was Orlando.
“I believe they are more due to who I’ve encountered in London, and not the soldiers.”
He nodded and a small smile pulled at his lips. “The other reason I wish to speak with you.”
Blast. Why did she bring up Nate?
“Captain Storm has called for you every day since the wedding.”
A wee bit of guilt seeped into her conscience.
“You could be home to receive him.”
Isabella threw out her arms. “I’m needed here not at home taking tea with Rosalind.”
“At least give him a chance to say his peace.”
Orlando had no idea how much he was asking of her.
“I’ll give you one week. If you do not allow Captain Storm a moment of your time, then I will tell him exactly where to find you.”
Panic rushed through her veins. “You wouldn’t!”
“Yes. I would.” He took a step forward. “I love you, Isabella, but I fully believe you are doing a disservice to both you and Captain Storm.”
Tears sprang to her eyes. “I’m afraid.”
“I know,” he said gently. “That’s why it’s so important and why I will be here for you no matter the end result.”
“You may be a good doctor, but you can’t mend a heart.”
“I don’t believe I’ll need to.”
Orlando wasn’t going to change his mind on the subject, and Isabella knew him well enough that if something didn’t happen, she’d be facing Nate in a week.
Unless Nate decided he wasn’t going to be bothered and stopped calling on her.
Chapter 22
Had he not looked directly into Isabella’s smoky eyes and felt the instant rush of love and desire mingled with distrust and betrayal, Nate would forget her and plan where he would travel to next, which would most likely be Barbados to visit his brother’s sugar plantation.
Isabella promised to speak with him, but like the days before the wedding, when he called on her, she was not at home. She couldn’t be gone every day could she? And if so, where the hell was she?
And the more she avoided him, the more he became determined to find her.
He’d even asked Mary to call on her yesterday. The two were friends at one time, and Mary was eager to visit with Isabella again. But she wasn’t even home then.
If Samuel wasn’t pacing behind the settee in the parlor, Nate would be. Frustration didn’t begin to describe his emotions at the moment.
Since when did he chase after a chit?
Except, Isabella wasn’t a chit. She was the woman he’d fallen in love with.
A woman who was avoiding him.
A woman who had lied to him about who she was.
A woman who kissed him with passion and desire.
A woman who rejected him and might as well have torn his heart from his chest.
Why the hell was he even pursuing this?
When did he lose his pride?
Perhaps he should wait outside of Felding’s townhouse for her to either leave or return. It may be the only chance he had to encounter her. Yet, the very idea was unappealing. He wasn’t so desperate, yet.
If his head was in charge, he’d forget her. But while his mind was being reasonable, his heart remained stubborn on the subject, and his nether regions, well, they were all too prepared for an intimate encounter with the beautiful Isabella.
“Can we go to a ball tonight, Mother?” Hannah asked.
“Are you so anxious to marry?” Mother demanded with disappointment.
“I am two and twenty,” Hannah reminded her.
“A child,” her mother dismissed.
“I believe yo
u’d already been married and safely delivered four children by the time you were the same age as Hannah,” Nate pointed out.
“A much different time,” his mother dismissed. “In this modern age, there is no need for ladies to marry fresh out of the school room.”
Samuel hitched a disbelieving brow.
“Besides, I would have my daughters close. There are plenty of bachelors in Northumberland, and they will marry one of them.”
Deborah frowned and slouched in her seat.
“Then why come to London at all?” Nate demanded.
“For the holiday, of course,” she answered brightly.
“A holiday spent in a townhouse in Mayfair with an occasional walk in Hyde Park,” Tabitha grumbled. “We can walk at home.”
The butler hurried into the room, his eyes wide. “It’s His Grace.”
His mother’s teacup and saucer clattered as she tried to set it on the table.
“Which His Grace?” Samuel asked calmly.
How many dukes called on them? It was unlikely Roxburg pulled himself from his bride, so of course it had to be Danby. It was only a matter of time before their great-uncle darkened their doorstep.
“Me!” The Duke of Danby strode through the doorway.
His mother appeared as she might have an apoplexy at any moment by the terror on her face.
“To what do we owe this visit, Your Grace?” Nate asked politely.
“Would you care for tea, Your Grace?” Hannah asked.
“No, thank you.” He turned his attention, or glare, on their mother.
She sank back against the cushions.
“You, Madame, will cease hiding in this house as if the world is full of monsters.”
He shook his cane at her. She pulled even further back as terror filled her eyes.
“You’ve not presented your daughters anywhere since you scurried from my granddaughter’s al fresco. They will attend the Bentley ball this evening even if I have to come here and drag them there myself.” He narrowed his eyes on her. “You do not want me to be forced to do so.”
Weathering Captain Storm Page 10