“We’ll see,” I said. And then immediately felt apprehensive for doing things in this manner. I should have blindsided her, just like she did me. That way, I couldn’t have given her a chance to campaign against me and for her, like she surely was going to do. But, at the same time, I felt that seeing her and telling her what I was planning to do was morally right. To stoop to her level would be contemptuous, to say the very least, and I didn’t want to be associated with that kind of behavior. My parents raised me to be a gentleman. I didn’t always behave in such a fashion, and, more often than I would like to admit, I behaved as something less than a gentleman. But I was better than behaving low and under-handed. I wanted to be above-board.
Portia was staring at me. “So, I guess you want to have a meeting today. I doubt that there are enough partners here to constitute a quorum. It will just have to be another day, and, by then, I will have worked my magic on everybody here. You won’t stand a chance.”
I didn’t waver. “There doesn’t have to be that many partners here to constitute a quorum. Just 50 partners have to be present for there to be a quorum. And you know, as well as I do, that there are at least that many partners present on any given day. There might be about 10 missing on any given day, because of traveling schedules or vacation days, but that’s it. So, nice try.”
Portia looked surprised at that. It was becoming apparent that she had never read the firm’s constitution, as she seemed to not even know how many partners have to be present for major decisions to stick.
But she did attempt to bluff her way through. “Well, with something as major as this, you need a 2/3 majority of the majority of the partners. So, 50 won’t cut it for something like this.”
“Nope. Nice try. I read the firm’s constitution when I first got this position, and I re-read it yesterday, cover to cover. 2/3 majority of a quorum is all that is required. That’s it. You wanna counter with anything else?”
She shrugged. “No. I’m not worried. At all. These partners here either fear me or love me. Very few of them feel neutrally about me. So, not worried. You call your little meeting today. Go ahead. You’re going to look like a fool. Especially if you decide to pull your ‘I’m going to resign’ act, and the partners essentially say ‘go ahead.’ At that point, you’re going to look like an idiot when you say ‘I didn’t really mean it.’ And, that means that you will no longer have that threat in your arsenal. Everybody will know that it’s empty. Which means that the next meeting, where I propose firing your girlfriend again, you won’t have the teeth to fight me. You’ll be firing blanks. Is that really what you want?”
I had to admit, she was good. She was playing chess, here. Very strategic chess. And, what she was saying was partially true. I mean, I didn’t want to give up this partnership. At all. I loved my work. It was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. With the body of work that I was getting at that firm, I could very well be considered one of the legends one day. Corbusier, van der Rohe, Wright, and me. Well, not quite in their league, but there wasn’t a doubt that I could very well be considered one of the top architects of all time when I retired. If I kept on the pace that I was on with this firm. That was important to me. It was important that I get the chance to not only design buildings, but also influence future generations. I wanted to be studied in the top architectural schools.
So, I held my breath. Because Portia was 100% correct about something else as well. And that was that I couldn’t threaten to resign if it was an empty threat. I had to back it up by actually resigning. And that would leave all my projects in the lurch. The Chase people would be furious, and they very well might blackball me in New York City. I had many, many projects that were coming down the pipeline this year, most of them high-profile, with very well-known clients. All of whom would be apoplectic that I would just leave the firm, and leave them scrambling. I would look foolish and unprofessional.
I had to do another gut-check. But I knew that this was going to be one of my most nerve-wracking moments of my entire life. It was very well possible that today would be my last day at this firm, and that it could very well end my career. I mean, not totally end it. But it would end it as I knew it, and that, after today, I no longer would be considered to be the rising star in the architectural world. I doubted that I could get the same caliber of clients without the backing of this firm.
But it was something that I absolutely felt that I had to do. I would pick up the pieces if the partners chose to allow me to resign, as opposed to ousting Portia. I would still have my position at Columbia, and I hoped that I could still get a foothold in the New York City architectural scene. But probably not.
The stakes couldn’t be higher.
Yet, I knew that I was doing the right thing. I knew it as sure as I knew anything in my entire life.
Portia and I could no longer work together. She was dangerous and delusional. Worse than that, she would not rest until she destroyed Scotty. She proved that. So, I had no choice. I had to make a stand, and I had to do it quickly.
Chapter 29
Scotty
I laid in bed that morning, and Jack and I played cards and watched low-brow television. Real Housewives was on that day, and we sat there and half watched it and half played cards while we talked. It was about 8 in the morning.
“So, Scotty, do you mind telling me what’s going on with you? I mean, really?”
I sighed. “Well, Jack, it’s kinda weird. I mean, Mr. Lucas put me through hell. More than he ever did before. He’s more sadistic than he has ever been. Even crueler. I think that Elle divorcing him sent him even more over the edge. I never remembered him getting such pleasure out of hurting me before. But he did. He loved to see me writhe in pain and cry.” I paused. “But I’m handling it better than I thought that I would. I think because I have already processed his violating me, because it happened so often before. It’s horrible that it happened again…but, at the same time, there’s not a lot that I haven’t raged about regarding him. So, I think that I can psychologically handle it. I think.”
Jack nodded his head. “That makes sense. But there’s something going on. Something is happening in that pretty little head of yours, and I want to make sure that you’re straight with it.”
“I know. And I appreciate that. I just hope that Nick is going to be okay. I think that he’s forcing the partners to choose between him and Portia, and that makes me nervous, to say the very least. I mean, what happens if the partners just say ‘okay, Nick, go ahead and walk. We can’t lose Portia?’ He’s going to be screwed if that happens. Because of me.”
Jack gave me his bitch please look, and laid down some cards. “Gin. Now, Scotty, how many times do you have to be told that none of this is your fault? That you didn’t make that woman the cray-cray bitch that she is? You didn’t force her to have the hots for your loverboy. You didn’t make Nick the hot, beautiful stud that he is, which means that women are wetting their panties in his presence constantly. None of that was your doing. So, Portia acting the way that she acts has nothing to do with you. If Nick loses his position, it’s because of that insane clown posse Portia, not you.”
“I know that intellectually. But I’ll still feel responsible.”
Jack sighed. “Okay, then, let’s appeal to logic, shall we? If Nick had never met you, would Portia still be insane?”
“That’s a dumb question. Of course she would.”
“Okay. Now, if Nick had never met you, do you think that Portia would be full of dirty tricks that are designed to hurt Nick?”
I nodded my head.
“Okay, then. Take yourself out of the equation. Nick would have to force a showdown regarding Portia no matter if you’re in the picture or not. So, again, Scotty Marie, IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!” And then he smiled and said “My deal. What’s your pleasure?”
“Let’s play some hearts.”
At that, Jack started dealing the cards.
I took a deep breath. “Okay, Jack, you make logical sense. It�
��s not my fault. But how do I stop feeling guilty?”
“I’d say long-term therapy, but god knows you don’t have the money for that. So, if you don’t listen to Dr. Jack here, then maybe you need to read some books on the subject. I’ll find some for you in the library. Anyhow, I do know one thing, because I’ve read about it myself. Sexual abuse survivors tend to feel inappropriate guilt. Not sure how to deal with it, though.”
“Inappropriate guilt. Sounds like the story of my life.”
“Well, you need to just think things through before you start feeling guilty about something that you had nothing to do with. God gave that woman the cray. You can’t feel bad about anything associated with her at all.”
“Okay,” I said, but I felt unconvinced. “There’s my trick,” I said, laying down some cards.
Jack smiled. “Speaking of tricks,” he said, laying down some more cards. “I think I might have a date this Saturday night. And I don’t think that he’s a closet case, either.”
“Oh, do tell? Is he a Wall Street type?”
“No. I’m done with those. I read somewhere that most of those Wall Street types are psycho, you know?”
I smiled. “Yes, I’m aware of that study. There are a high percentage who fit the criteria for having anti-social personality disorder. Which makes sense if you think about it. But, go on. Who’s this new guy?” I didn’t want to refer to the new guy as a “trick,” even though that was probably what he was going to end up being, knowing Jack. “Do tell.”
“Well, let’s see. He’s a model for Burberry, and he’s a skinny little twink with an attitude. So not like my usual burly boys. And he’s way gay. Way gay. Here…let me get a magazine. I’ll show you!”
At that, Jack got up and ran down the stairs and came right back up. He flipped through the Esquire magazine interestedly. “Let’s see, here…” And then he came upon a Burberry ad and showed me the picture of an angelic-looking boy who looked to be around 19 years old. The boy had big blue eyes, full pouty lips and a mop of uncombed brown wavy hair. He had the typical look of a Burberry boy –contemptuous yet sexy. With his perfect pale skin, long eyelashes and red lips, he looked like a porcelain doll come to life.
“So, what do you think?”
“I think he’s the prettiest boy I’ve ever seen in my entire life. How old is he?”
“22, so just five years younger than me. What else do you think?”
“He looks….pouty. Pretty and pouty. At any rate, I can’t wait to meet him!”
“Oh, I want you to meet him. He’s very pretty, but he seems like a nice guy. I met him through one of the actors on the musical I’m working on. We haven’t gone out yet, but I’m looking forward to Saturday for sure.”
I nodded my head. It was so difficult to get excited for Jack and his men, just because, well, I had been there so many times before. There was the college football player. And the manager of a Walgreens. And then there was the struggling musician. After that was the waiter/actor/model. That was all before he decided to look for “Wall Street types,” because he was tired of always having to pay his date’s way. Which was getting expensive, and Jack, while he was better off financially then myself, couldn’t afford that. Jack, to his credit, did manage to snag a few of those “Wall Street types,” before deciding that they were either boring or too closeted. And now there was Burberry boy. I hoped that Burberry boy would be something other than a boy who was passing through Jack’s revolving door, but I was not holding my breath on that one.
Jack laid down some more cards. “Now, Scotty, I can read your mind. You think that this one is going to be a temporary trick like all the rest. And, what can I say? You’re probably right. But Babe Ruth once said that every strike brought him closer to his next home run. It would do well for you to remember that.”
I smiled. I had never heard that quote before, but it was a good one. In life, it was always good to remember that every failure brings one closer to success. Kinda like Thomas Edison doing thousands of experiments before inventing the light bulb. He, too, said that every failed experiment brought him one step closer to success. I often wondered what the world would be like if Edison had given up after the 999th try, if the thousandth one was the successful one.
“You’re right,” I said, putting down another trick. “Every new boy brings you closer to The One.”
“Well, we can’t all be as lucky as you. Hitting the home run on your first at-bat with Nick.”
“Yeah. Lucky, that’s me,” I said. “Anyhow, let’s total up our points and move on to the next hand.”
Jack was studying me. “I meant what I said,” he said, as he shuffled the cards. “You are lucky. Nick is your very first boyfriend, and what a phenomenal first boyfriend he is. You didn’t have to go through all the broken hearts that the rest of us have to.”
“No, but I went through years of Mr. Lucas. I think I paid my dues.” I was starting to get a little bit irritated with Jack. Usually he wasn’t this insensitive. Well, he was, but it was all in good fun and he usually picked up on my non-verbal cues a little bit better. “Now deal. Time’s a-wasting.”
Jack shook his head at me. “Tut tut. I think little Scotty is getting just a wee bit cranky. I’m only telling you to appreciate the positives in your life, instead of dwelling on the negatives. And I think that not having to go through crappy relationships to get to your prince charming is one of those positives in your life. That’s all I was getting at.”
I sighed. Jack, as usual, was right. Sometimes I did need to appreciate the things that go right in my life, instead of dwelling on what had gone wrong. Glass half full and all of that. And Nick was definitely something that had gone right. Thus far, anyhow.
“So,” I said. “Where are you guys going to go?”
“I think we’re going to try that new restaurant in Chelsea. At least, that’s what he said. And then, who knows?”
“Well, don’t give away the milk for free. See where it gets you to make your boys wait for once.”
“Oh, but Scotty. That’s my calling card. I’m just that good.”
“Well, maybe so, but it’s gotten you exactly nowhere so far. I’m just saying to try something different for once. You know, don’t give a facial on the first date.” And then I felt myself blushing for saying something so crude, even to Jack. “I mean. Well, you know what I mean.”
Jack was trying to hold back a smile. “Scotty Marie. What porn movies have you been watching?”
And then I gave him a look, and he immediately looked embarrassed. After all, the only porns I had seen were the ones that Mr. Lucas had forced me to watch for “educational purposes.” Which was where I had learned about facials in the first place. Personally, I found them disgusting, and hoped that Nick never wanted to give me one.
“Sorry about that,” Jack said, looking chastened. He sighed. “Sometimes I can be such a boob.”
I smiled. “Sometimes?” And then I started cracking up, in spite of myself.
Jack started laughing too. “Touché, little one. Touché.”
Then we played another hand in silence. I was concentrating on my hand, and also concentrating on what was going on right at that moment. I looked at the clock, and it read 10 AM. I felt my heart racing as I thought about the possibility that Nick was summoning the partners right at that moment….
Chapter 30
Nick
It was time to retreat to my office. I had to get my war plans ready, just like a general. Look at every possible battle front and see what maneuvering I could do to make things go my way. I brought out the roster of partners to see who I could count on to be solid allies, who were not solid allies but could be persuaded, and who were just plain lost causes. As I chewed on a pencil and examined the list, I determined that there were about 10 lost causes.
Ten people who would not cross Portia, no matter what. They were all considered by everybody in the office to be lackeys and acolytes. She kept them in line by funneling to them cho
ice projects and kissing their asses. At least half of the ten salivated over her, and everybody in the office knew it. Portia always warned me that she would never hesitate to use all of her considerable assets to get what she wanted, and she was as good as her word.
I had only been at the firm for a few months, but I had already gotten the lay of the land as far as the firm politics. That was one thing that I tried to do at every firm – find out the alliances and what tied them together. Sometimes alliances were weak and could be broken. Other times they were strong and there was no use trying to break them. There were always a few mercenaries in every alliance – people who really had no loyalties, but pretty much went where their bread could be buttered the best. They were the ones that would be targeted in any kind of power move like the one that I had planned that afternoon.
So, I went back through the ten, carefully, to make sure that they were each lost causes. I had to make inroads into that little posse, just in case one of the other partners that I thought would be on my side decided to blindside me.
I went through each name and wrote down the person’s strengths and weaknesses, and where they might be vulnerable. The first four that I examined were the only four who voted with her in the last showdown – Mark, Gregory, William and Richard. They were obviously the tightest with her, as they were literally the only ones who stayed loyal in the last fight.
I put those four aside, and concentrated on the other six, who I assumed had more of a loose alliance with her. One of those six was Fred, who was obviously in love with Portia. Well, maybe not in love with her, but he definitely had it bad. I felt a little bit sorry for the man – he was one of those nebbish losers who never got the girl and go thrown into lockers in high school. I actually went to bat for guys like him in high school, because I was very popular and I was able to influence the other kids not to pick on the underdogs. Now, Portia was treating him like the contemptuous queen bee that she was.
No doubt Portia was a mean girl in high school, just like she was at the firm, and she probably would be the one who would pour the bucket of pig’s blood on people like Fred as a “joke.” After all, she was drop-dead gorgeous and had not a hint of morality in that beautiful body. She probably ate men like Fred for dinner.
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