The girls on campus were the last to come around to the idea of me being in a relationship. I found it fucking hilarious that they’d had no problem hopping in my bed with the hope that I might decide I wanted them around for more. But the second I met a girl I really did want to keep around? Well, that shit apparently didn’t fly and the claws started to come out. I made it crystal clear that any chick who messed with Kaylie was on my shit list, so that didn’t last very long. But the catty glares didn’t stop. And it took for-fucking-ever for the sexual offers and heavy flirting to finally come to an end. I had to shoot down girl after girl any time Kaylie wasn’t with me before they finally clued in that I wasn’t interested. Hell, I even had to turn down some offers while I was with Kaylie from rude-as-shit women who seriously thought I’d be okay with them disrespecting my girlfriend like that.
Kaylie never complained about it though. Either she was the least insecure woman ever or she just didn’t care enough to worry if I’d stray. And I was too much of a chickenshit to ask her which one it was because I wasn’t sure I would like the answer. She never talked about what would happen with us after graduation and always changed the subject when I brought it up. It was tough as shit to get her to really open up about anything. Our lives had been so different, and I tried to be patient since I understood that the future was something she tried to not think about since she didn’t really trust in it after what had happened to her parents. But it was so fucking hard because I wasn’t a patient person, and I could see myself with Kaylie long term.
A future of having Kaylie in my bed night after night was something I could so easily picture in my head. I knew it should freak me out, but things were so good with her that it didn’t. And it certainly didn’t hurt that the sex between us just kept getting better and better. I wouldn’t have thought it was possible, but as we learned each other’s bodies, we figured out exactly what the other person liked. We both used it to our advantage so we could drive each other wild, almost like it was a contest to see who could do a better job of making the other lose control. I still fantasized about tying her up so she was at my mercy, but I hadn’t brought it up again—yet. I figured I could afford to be patient because I fully intended to make sure it happened. I had plenty of time since there was no way I was letting her get away.
Kaylie was going to be busy all day getting ready for her dance thing tonight, so I was on my way to meet Aubrey for lunch. We hadn’t hung out just the two of us in a while, and I was looking forward to catching up with what was going on in her world. I hadn’t seen her out as much lately, and I wasn’t sure if it was because I’d been so busy with Kaylie or if there was something going on with her that I needed to know about. I didn’t talk to Lex as much anymore either, but I still knew that she would have called me if she’d thought Aubrey needed my help, so I hadn’t worried about it too much. It hadn’t been until Kaylie asked me if she was okay that I’d realized that she’d definitely seemed more than a little off lately. I hadn’t seen her with any guys hanging around, so I couldn’t help but wonder if some guy was about to get his ass kicked for breaking my little sister’s heart.
When I pulled into the parking lot of her favorite local deli, I was surprised to see she was already there since Aubrey was notorious in our family for being late, and it usually wasn’t even just a little bit late either. We all teased her about it, pointing out that she’d even been late for her own birth since my mom had gone a full week past her due date when my little sis was born. My brothers thought it was hilarious because all of us boys had been early, and my mom had been so pissed when she didn’t have her a week early. To my mom, it was like Aubrey had been two weeks late instead, and she still complained about it any time one of us brought it up. Aubrey was so used to it by now that she just used it as her excuse whenever she was late for anything and passed the blame to Mom for not getting her out of there on time.
As I walked into the deli, I quickly scanned the room for Aubrey. She was already at a table with drinks and sandwiches in front of her. I glanced at my phone to check the time to make sure I hadn’t totally messed up, but I wasn’t running late so she must have gotten here early. Very strange. When she spotted me, a huge grin flashed across her face, settling my nerves a little bit.
“Hey, bro,” she greeted me as I sat down. “I hope you don’t mind. I took the liberty of grabbing your favorite stuff from here. I was starving so I didn’t want to wait until you got here to order.”
“Aubrey, when have you ever known me to be upset when there’s food waiting to be eaten?”
“How about when Dad’s the one who cooked it?” she teased, knowing damn well we all ran in the other direction the rare times that he decided to help Mom out by making dinner. He was a disaster in the kitchen.
“Well played,” I said before taking a huge bite of the corned beef sandwich in front of me.
We both ate in silence until most of the food was gone. She hadn’t been joking when she said she was starving. Which meant something was wrong because Aubrey was a nervous eater. Any time something was worrying her, she went to food for comfort, thanks to our mom for having used it that way with us when we were younger.
“Mmmmm, that was so good,” she said, wiping her mouth with her napkin.
“Okay, Aubrey. Spill.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, trying to sound all innocent like she didn’t know that I knew something was going on.
“You know exactly what I mean’” I responded as I pointed at the empty plates in front of us. “You know I appreciate you ordering lunch and all, but I know that when you eat like this something’s bothering you. How can I help you if you don’t talk to me about it?”
“Shit, Jackson. It’s not me I’m worried about,” she admitted.
That wasn’t what I had expected her to say. “Then what the fuck is going on? Because you’ve seemed different lately.”
“I’m fine, Jackson. I know I’ve changed a little over the last few months, but it’s just because I’m finally growing up. And just in time because I’m going to be a senior soon. I can’t act like a child my whole life.”
“Aubrey, one of the things I love most about you is that you can still act like a kid sometimes. Don’t change too much, okay? It’s part of what makes you who you are. Although I am sure the parental units will be thrilled at the idea of you taking school and stuff more seriously.”
“Yeah. I’ve even talked to Dad about working in one of the branches this summer,” she surprised me with since she’d always been so against working for our dad.
“Whoa! Really? What made you decide that?”
“I think it’s because I see so many people around me with purpose in their lives while I’ve been drifting a little aimlessly,” she replied. “Lex has her planes. Drake has rugby. You have banking. Kaylie has dance. Hell, even Char has her parents’ bar to go back to if that’s what she decides she wants to do next. All I will have is a shiny degree that says I did my time here with no plan for what’s next.”
“So the bank is going to be your plan?”
“For now. Maybe I’ll find something else, but it’s as good a place as any to start. As long as you don’t think I’m butting in or anything?” she asked. “We’ve always known you were the one of us kids who was going to end up working with Dad ever since you took to math so well and the rest of us kids didn’t.”
“Aubrey, I don’t mind at all. I’d love it, and I am sure Dad will too,” I reassured her. “But if that’s not what’s bothering you, then what is?”
The smile that had been plastered across her face from seconds ago wiped completely off. “It’s Kaylie.”
“Kaylie? Is something wrong?” I asked as I grabbed my phone to see if she’d tried calling me and I’d somehow missed it.
Aubrey reached out to stop me before I dialed Kaylie’s number. “I didn’t explain that very well. You know how she has the showcase tonight?”
“Yeah?” I asked, still not getting w
here she was going with this.
“Has she talked to you about it very much?”
“Not really. It’s just a show for the end of the year, right? What is there that really needs to be said about that?” I asked, still not understanding.
“Shit, Jackson,” she sighed. “There are going to be scouts from dance companies there. People who are going to be there in part because Kaylie is dancing.”
“Okay, and your point is what, exactly?”
“I know she means a lot to you, Jackson. I can tell how much any time I’m around the two of you or even just when someone mentions her to you. Your whole face lights up. So my point is this. What are you going to do if she gets an offer to go dance somewhere like New York or Chicago or Los Angeles? Dancing has been her thing since she was a little girl, and it means even more to her now because it makes her feel close to her mom. Have you guys even talked about what comes next for you with graduation just around the corner?”
Fuck yeah, I had thought about what would come next for Kaylie and me, but I hadn’t factored her getting her dream job offer that far away from home into the equation. “I guess if that happens then I have some serious thinking to do, Aubrey. Because I’m not ready for this thing to end between us even if she ends up a thousand miles away.”
Chapter 15
Kaylie
Time today flew by, and before I knew it, the showcase was about to begin. There had been a last-minute issue with my costume so I hadn’t had time to go out front to make sure Jackson made it here okay and found his seat. This was the first time I’d danced in front of Jackson on stage, and I wanted him to enjoy it. Knowing that he would be in the audience cheering me on helped calm my nerves each time I thought about the fact that there would be others out there who were here to judge my every step. I learned this afternoon that my aunt would be here, so I already knew there would be at least one person out there who would find fault with my dancing. So I tried to focus my thoughts on dancing for Jackson and not worrying about what anyone else would think.
Jackson: Good luck tonite!
Kaylie: Thx :) C u soon.
I couldn’t help but chuckle when I realized it was Jackson who’d just sent me a text. He had the most amazing sense of timing. It was almost like he had a sixth sense when it came to me, calling or texting when I was thinking about him. Although it might not be saying too much since I thought about him almost constantly, I couldn’t count how many times I’d grabbed my phone to dial his number only to pick up a call from him instead. It was kind of eerie sometimes. Almost like we had some ESP thing going on between us. Which made it very difficult to keep things from him like I was with my dancing.
It hadn’t started out that way on purpose. I hadn’t realized that Jackson wouldn’t know that I wanted to dance professionally. I mean, I was a dance major for a reason. But he wasn’t really familiar with the dance world except from his sister’s perspective. I really adored Aubrey, but dancing was just a hobby for her. So his perspective on dance was a little skewed by that. Not that dancing for fun wasn’t awesome, because it was. I just wasn’t ready to give up on my dream of dancing professionally yet.
I needed this dream to define me. It was what I’d held on to ever since my parents died. My mom was a huge dreamer, too. I hoped to be like her and never stop chasing my dreams. There’s nothing more magical than when you catch one and hold it in your hand, even if just for a moment. And this was the performance that would determine the rest of my life as a dancer. If I was going to be able to catch this dream or not. And I hadn’t been ready to share all of that with Jackson because I was scared to death that being so happy with him was going to make me rethink this dream when I wasn’t ready to do that yet.
Talking to him about my hopes and fears would have just made them more real. So for once, I just went with the flow and pushed all my concerns aside to focus on today instead of worrying about what would happen tomorrow. It was only now that I thought about how that might make Jackson feel if I did get an offer and had to explain to him that I’d known there was a chance this would happen. And I felt like a total bitch for not talking to him sooner. I didn’t know how I would be able to make this right or if I even could. Because now, if I did actually get an offer, it would affect him too. I couldn’t pretend that it wouldn’t any longer. The moment of truth was here, and it was entirely possible that I had let my fear of being abandoned create a situation where Jackson would have every right to walk away from me. And it would be my own damn fault.
But I couldn’t focus on that right now. I needed to go out there and dance like I’d never danced before. Less than an hour of acting like an ostrich with its head in the sand and pretending that nothing could go wrong was totally doable. It had to be because the only alternative was failure. And with my aunt out there ready to tell me ‘I told you so’ about my decision to attend Blythe, I wasn’t ready to admit defeat.
“Kaylie, you’re on in ten minutes,” one of the stage hands yelled to me across the dressing room.
I moved to do one more round of stretches, warming my muscles up so I’d be ready to go when it was my turn. As I stretched, I visualized the choreography in my mind, picturing myself moving through each step flawlessly. It was a trick one of my dance coaches had told me about years ago that worked really well for me.
Before long, they were announcing my name. I took one deep, cleansing breath to clear my head and moved towards the stage, waiting for the first beat of my music to begin. I heard my cue and moved onto the stage for what ended up being the fastest three and a half minutes of my life.
By the time it was over, I was panting heavily from the exertion with sweat dripping down my body. I felt like it had gone really well, that I had made it into the zone where I could do no wrong. As I walked off the stage, I was sure that, no matter what happened, I could be happy with the fact that I’d done my personal best and left everything I had inside me out on the dance floor. If I didn’t get an offer, then at least I wouldn’t have anything to regret about my performance.
Several people offered me their congratulations as I made my way back to the changing area. I nodded absently in response, focused on getting cleaned up so I could just go find Jackson. Now that it was over, I felt an urgent need to talk to him about everything going on in my head. I just hoped that I hadn’t waited too long.
Once I had changed back into my street clothes and made it to the lobby to search for Jackson, the place was packed. I was one of the last performances of the night, and I’d had a ton of makeup on that I’d wanted to wash off. I’d thought I hadn’t taken that long to get ready, but apparently it was still longer than everyone else based on the mob of people I had to weave my way around while I was searching for him. I finally spotted him across the room and was headed that way when I heard my aunt’s voice from behind me.
“I certainly hope you don’t expect to get a good offer after that performance, Kaylie,” she said in her grating tone of voice.
Jackson’s eyes were on me, so I gave him a reassuring smile before turning to great my aunt. “Hello, Kathy.”
Her expression turned icy with my words. “How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that disrespectful name? You know that it’s either Kathleen or Aunt Kathleen, Kaylie. Really, must you be so immature? You’re getting ready to graduate from college. I would have thought you’d have outgrown this kind of behavior by now.”
Okay, maybe it was immature to always use a nickname I knew she hated. But I was okay with it because it got to her every single time. And I’d take my wins with her where and when I could. I was pretty sure that wasn’t going to change regardless of how old I was.
I offered her an extremely insincere apology. “Sorry, Aunt Kathleen.”
Apparently she either chose to ignore my sarcasm or didn’t catch it. “That’s much better. Now, I’ve made some calls to see if we can get you some extra training before you go out on any auditions this summer. I really wish you had taken my
advice on gone to a school better suited to properly train you. You’ve developed some atrocious habits during your years here.”
“That’s funny because I thought I did very well tonight,” I disagreed.
“Please, Kaylie. You know you’ve never been a good judge of that. Trust me when I say it will be an uphill battle to get anyone who was here to ever seriously consider you in the future. You have your work cut out for you if you want to undo the damage you’ve already done.”
Jackson joined us in the middle of my aunt’s tirade, placing his hand on my back in a comforting gesture. When he didn’t walk past and continued to stand behind me, my aunt gave me a questioning look.
I introduced them. “Aunt Kathleen, this is my boyfriend Jackson. Jackson, this is my aunt.”
Jackson stretched out his free hand to shake hers. “A pleasure, ma’am.”
“It’s nice to see Kaylie dating someone with manners,” my aunt replied. “But I hope you understand that we are having a private conversation right now regarding her future. Would you mind waiting over there?” she asked as she gestured away from where we were standing.
I was mortified by her behavior. Jackson was being perfectly polite to her and she still had to be a major bitch just so she could continue to tell me what a horrible dancer I had become.
“Jackson, no. You don’t have to go anywhere.”
He leaned down to kiss my cheek before addressing my aunt. “Actually, I do mind waiting over there. Kaylie invited me to be here with her tonight, so that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”
“Well,” Aunt Kathleen muttered. “I guess our conversation will just have to wait until tomorrow then since you are too busy with your boyfriend to have a serious discussion with me. Kaylie, plan on my picking you up for breakfast at your dorm at seven a.m.”
The Blythe College Complete Series Box Set Page 33